In response to the comments about kids sneaking out, wanting what they want, etc -- there is often a reason for that and it has nothing to do with the kids being spoiled, out of control, or whatever. It has to do with the family as a whole. Something is askew. Even "Families of the Year" can put on quite a show for a community on the outside but be falling apart behind closed doors. Doesn't have to be abuse or neglect - just a lack of connectedness or meaningful relationships.
Hold on to your kids, and start when they're small. One can't be distant from their younger children and magically think they'll have a good relationship with them when they're teens. It's something that has to be maintained and fostered.
So when I hear about kids climbing out of windows, I don't always assume it's just a bratty kid with no respect for the parents and who just 'want what they want'. It often means the kid is in search of something they're not getting at home. :twocents:
I appreciate everyones opinions... Myself as a young teen.... I snuck out, I hung with the older boys. I feel that I had great parents, who where very involved. My mom knew all of my friends parents, visited houses before I could go...etc... But my sister and I still did the stupid stuff. I was having sex at 13, my sister at 14. Now as an adult, I am not proud to admit that, but hey, it happened.
I had a friend, same type of attentive family, that got pregnant at 13 by a 27 yr old! Her Moms solution? abortion, and keep it quiet. For some, thats just how life is. I do not agree with that....... But sometimes thats how the family dynamics play out.
I graduated highschool early, and moved away to college at 16. I had my own apartment that I payed for from working 2 jobs and going to school full time. Within 3 months, I moved in with a guy that was 32!!!! I kept that from my parents, enough that I kept my own apartment, so when they came to visit it looked as though I was on my own.
After that I met my now husband, who is 10 years my senior. I had just turned 18, he was 28. He is a wonderful man, and sad for him, we were at the same stages in life... lol.... But that is beside the point. We have been together for almost 9 years, and have a beautiful family.
I guess what I am getting at, it is normal.... wait not normal, but I have seen it as normal in my expierence...... That a 12 yr old would be blinded by love, would want something like this, would sneak and lie, and do these things because she wanted to. Not because her homelife was horrible, not because of past abuse, just because she is a 12 yr old developed almost woman. And thinks she is old enough to know.
I AM NOT PLACING ANY BLAME!!!!! At 12, when I or my friends did these stupid things, we didnt have a huge consequence like she is in the middle of. And we never thought anything bad could happen. Just trying to get into the mindset of this situation. I often wonder about my ex's what were they thinking? I was a child.... It was illegal!!!!!!!
I hope some of this made sense, and my point gets across, I am exhausted, and feel I am blabbering.
I just pray with all of my heart Brittany is safe, and will find her way back home.