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It was just a number thrown out for people in her position. I don’t know what website it was gleaned from several threads ago. I was just using it as a jumping off point. It makes sense to me that she would make around average for her position especially considering so many years experience...

I think the disciplined on Sunday thing was just that it happened in the last weekend or two and was more memorable because all of them got a little too loud and crazy (or whatever) so Jen went stark raving angry yelling at them all then sending them to bed (or spanking or whatever). Kids tend...

I am positive they didn’t qualify for welfare benefits. At $53k, they would barely qualify for Earned Income Credit so even there wouldn’t have gotten food stamps. Then add the adoption subsidy. Definitely wouldn’t qualify. (Adoption subsidy is not taxed but is considered in regards to...

Grrrr Every state offers a subsidy for children considered special needs. Some states offer a subsidy for all kids adopted through the state. Subsidy may include a monetary amount monthly, medical, college, case management services, extra help for therapy/camp/etc. It is complex, but...

Generally, it is easier to foster or adopt another child once you’ve “successfully” done so. For example, if I called my agency today and said we wanted another child, I’d likely get one really quickly even though we already have a handful of kids, some with “issues.” We have proved our ability...

Generally, I would have thought they wouldn’t have left without all the kids. But I could see something like this. If they didn’t find them in a few hours, they may have felt they wouldn’t. And as if whatever made them leave so suddenly wasn’t enough, now they have two who could already be at...

That is just weird. The Harts adopted kids “from hard places” and I could see that some of them may find certain levels of independence challenging. But the chances that all six were that significantly affected by their histories seems slim. I have a handful of children “from hard places.”...

It is an astounding claim. And I would be surprised if there is anything other than personal opinion that backs it up. However, I will say that I homeschooled; and what I saw locally was that fewer than 1/3 are actually educating their children. I didn’t see any evidence of (or even suggestive...

So I want to say upfront that IF the Harts knew of what I’m going to say, it seems more likely to me that they would use it to cover their tears than using it wholeheartedly for the best interests of the children. 1) many times kids “from hard places” are a bit behind socially, even...

Right. Legally, biofamilybis no more related to the kids than I am. Obviously, no one would suggest I should profit from their deaths. I do think that this is an opportunity to consider carefully changes that need to be made in the system. I don’t know that I think any of those changes had...

I’m sure. I actually wonder if Jen may have had the paradoxical reaction, maybe doing it to embolden herself to commit this heinous crime?

It makes me EXTREMELY hyper and angry. It is beyond uncomfortable too. That stuff is evil!

And there are limits to what you *are* allowed to let foster kids do, especially at first. The supervision level is very high, one of my main issues with fostering older kids because some of it seems impossible to do in a way that is both developmentally appropriate AND meets the regulations of...

Its not really a strike against you. And yes, by the time they are looking for out-of-state adoptive parents, the numbers willing to adopt sibling groups with significant history (and they have significant history if they have to look out of state) dwindle a good bit. They pick the best family...

That is just not how it works....at all. Not even close. It takes soooo much to separate siblings. And there are checks and balance systems in place in order to do so. But I could tell you horror stories of kids that should have been separated and it happened too late or not at all. And kids...

You stated this soooo much better than I did.

<modsnip> And Jen explains here why Markis may not be in many of the pictures we see. Now, it could have been planned that way; but I kinda think not. I have a child whose pictures make them look forlorn, sullen, miserable much of the time. It was so hard to get a good picture! And I have...

This is how I felt at first. As an adoptive mom of kids "from hard places," I know how much that doing this long term can really change who you are, what you do, etc. There is positive, of course, but negative also. So what I saw at first was some moms who struggled, made poor choices, and...

Legally, the aunt, bioparents, etc are no more related to these children than you or I are. Obviously, I assume they could make an exception; but typically, these people would have no rights as those were lost with the termination of parental rights. {Right or wrong. Part of the reason we...

<modsnip> I don&#8217;t think being white or having a special ed endorsement mattered because NONE of it matters in the process. Yes, they ask you very intrusive questions and get your experience and education information. They get references and you take classes that include role playing and...