Dad Refuses to Give Up Newborn Son With Down Syndrome

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I just want to chime in here, I understand where KZ is coming form and if I understand correctly- the point she is making is that in some other countries these children's lives are very bleak- certainly not the kind of lives or the support we see for them like we do in countries like the US. When I heard about this story I really thought only two things- I was happy the father decided to keep the baby and I was grateful the mother HAD the child and even more grateful she was willing to give him up. I don't ever want to see any baby, but especially a baby with Down syndrome, being raised by a mother that doesn't want them. We all know how that can end- being Websleuthers. Babies being neglected, beaten or worse- murdered with long drawn out pretend kidnappings and whatnot!

My son with down syndrome is one of the greatest gifts I have ever been given and he teaches me more, on a daily basis, than I will ever be able to teach him. It pains me to say this but I would rather see these babies be aborted or given away than be neglected or abused. They feel things so deeply and believe others are good- their loving and intuitive natures make them all the more vulnerable and that just about kills me thinking they are not wanted or loved, hated or resented even.

In terms of the idea of siblings or other children in a family being responsible- in the end- for a family member with Down syndrome- so what? That IS what families are about. My daughters adore their brother with Down syndrome and understand his vulnerability. They love him and will be there for him, not because it is expected or demanded but because they want to. His cousins, boys and girls, feel the same way too. Some of them may step up to the plate more than others, some of them may feel resentment- who knows- but that is no different than siblings taking care of ailing parents or taking care of someone in their family who has had an accident or a stroke. It is life, the good, the bad and the ugly but hopefully with a whole heck of a lot of beauty for the various manifestations of lifes full experiences... the lessons and the love. I wouldn't trade that for anything "perfect".
 
Sonya610 said:
My point is he is knew the risks when women over 40 get pregnant.

On the upside he is a good vet and he wanted to retire a couple of years ago, but I haven't heard anything more about him retiring (likely because he cannot afford to now that they have huge medical bills due to the youngest).
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I know someone who had a child with downs at 20.

I had my last child at 41. All healthy and fine.

There are risks every time you have a baby.

But no matter what he is supporting his family.
 
I will never understand how these types of causes raise this much money. I don't think I have ever seen an fund for a missing or murdered person raise this much money, even mass shooting funds, when divided among the victims are not this much. What is up with all this outrage over some ancedote when there are problems in the world that affect millions of people? It is like people want to live in a world where this is the worst thing that is happening, so they ignore everything else, and are !!OUTRAGED over random stuff. I really hope this story ends up being a hoax, apparently the father hasn't even shown much proof that this actually happened.
 
If this was a woman who did not have any money or means to raise a child, can you imagine the names she would be called? There would be no fund for her.
 
eileenhawkeye said:
I will never understand how these types of causes raise this much money. I don't think I have ever seen an fund for a missing or murdered person raise this much money, even mass shooting funds, when divided among the victims are not this much. What is up with all this outrage over some ancedote when there are problems in the world that affect millions of people? It is like people want to live in a world where this is the worst thing that is happening, so they ignore everything else, and are !!OUTRAGED over random stuff. I really hope this story ends up being a hoax, apparently the father hasn't even shown much proof that this actually happened.
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Eileen, I think a large part of society can't and don't want to know about, let alone think about or contemplate, horrific crimes. Just like people don't want to know about incest and molestation- because it is just too difficult to contemplate or accept. This situation, however, people can think about, contemplate and hope for the best- even contribute financially.
 
eileenhawkeye said:
If this was a woman who did not have any money or means to raise a child, can you imagine the names she would be called? There would be no fund for her.
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That is not true at all. There was a woman recently collecting for baby Gammy in Thailand. She got a lot of donations.
 
eileenhawkeye said:
I will never understand how these types of causes raise this much money. I don't think I have ever seen an fund for a missing or murdered person raise this much money, even mass shooting funds, when divided among the victims are not this much. What is up with all this outrage over some ancedote when there are problems in the world that affect millions of people? It is like people want to live in a world where this is the worst thing that is happening, so they ignore everything else, and are !!OUTRAGED over random stuff. I really hope this story ends up being a hoax, apparently the father hasn't even shown much proof that this actually happened.
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Haven't shown much proof? What proof do you need? It was verified in msm that he had a child with Down syndrome and the mother is divorcing him.
 
jjenny said:
Haven't shown much proof? What proof do you need? It was verified in msm that he had a child with Down syndrome and the mother is divorcing him.
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Doesn't mean it is true.. MSM gets it wrong or does not like to full vet some things.
 
How could it be the hoax? It's very obvious from the photos of the kid that the kid does have Down syndrome. The father has the kid, and wife does admit she wanted to give up the kid (even if she is denying some other things).
 
jjenny said:
How could it be the hoax? It's very obvious from the photos of the kid that the kid does have Down syndrome. The father has the kid, and wife does admit she wanted to give up the kid (even if she is denying some other things).
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It could easily be a hoax or not what it has been presented to. What I want answered is where is all the resources he had before the baby was born. They were planning to take it home and care for it yes? So why does he need money now? Take it home and care for the child and save money and move away.
 
ScarlettScarpetta said:
It could easily be a hoax or not what it has been presented to. What I want answered is where is all the resources he had before the baby was born. They were planning to take it home and care for it yes? So why does he need money now? Take it home and care for the child and save money and move away.
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He doesn't have the home. His wife is divorcing him and apparently he isn't welcome back into their home (at least that is what been reported).
As to why does he need money now? Really?
He has an infant with a disability and no wife.
People in this situation go on public assistance (these program where everybody "donates" the money where they want to or not).
He just figured out a way to get a lot more money and only from people who actually want to donate.
 
I'm unwilling to involve myself in the abortion or fundraising debates. Just making myself clear from the start. I'm pro choice on the abortion front. I've been lucky enough to have 5 healthy children. My first and my last weren't planned. My third was born with a birth defect. Not a disability so it's not the same but if anyone had suggested I had an abortion, I'd have been p***ed! Really p***ed! I could never leave one of my own. Once born, s/he is here and is entitled to a loving family no matter what. My flesh and blood is my flesh and blood... My babies! JMO. I couldn't leave a child of mine!
 
jjenny said:
He doesn't have the home. His wife is divorcing him and apparently he isn't welcome back into their home (at least that is what been reported).
As to why does he need money now? Really?
He has an infant with a disability and no wife.
People in this situation go on public assistance (these program where everybody "donates" the money where they want to or not).
He just figured out a way to get a lot more money and only from people who actually want to donate.
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The child does not have a disability. He is an infant that needs to be fed and changed and loved. That is all. Just like the rest of the babies in the world. Get an apt. Do what you have to. Many women do it alone without fund me's.
He needs a job and a plan.
 
I don't understand why he would need this much money to raise a child with down syndrome? Is the child expected to have lots of hospital visits? Do they already know that he is so severely disabled that he needs 24/7 care? I would think that a lot of kids with down syndrome are able to go to school.
 
eileenhawkeye said:
I don't understand why he would need this much money to raise a child with down syndrome? Is the child expected to have lots of hospital visits? Do they already know that he is so severely disabled that he needs 24/7 care? I would think that a lot of kids with down syndrome are able to go to school.
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Right? This child is an infant. He needs formula and diapers. And a JOB.

I don't like people who ask for handouts. It bothers me a lot. This is not a catastrophic event.
 
ScarlettScarpetta said:
Right? This child is an infant. He needs formula and diapers. And a JOB.

I don't like people who ask for handouts. It bothers me a lot. This is not a catastrophic event.
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You might not like it, but it doesn't change the fact that the child automatically qualifies for disability. Starting from birth.
 
jjenny said:
How could it be the hoax? It's very obvious from the photos of the kid that the kid does have Down syndrome. The father has the kid, and wife does admit she wanted to give up the kid (even if she is denying some other things).
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A hoax as in evil mother tells loyal husband/father she wants nothing to do with that retarded baby and she is divorcing him asap (in the hospital room, moments after father meets baby and falls in love with baby etc...).

It becomes a worldwide story and the fundraising starts, and donations are raised quickly.

Then maybe it turns out "evil mother" has a change of heart after father and baby relocate to NZ with all of that donated cash.

(Sort of like the lesbian waitress that didn't get a tip yet had a nasty hate message scrawled on the bill....yes she was a lesbian and a waitress, but the rest of it was a lie that raised a LOT of money).

The whole story and photos seem very very CONTRIVED to me, imo.
 
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