Hi All. I've been so busy with moving and getting back into the post-trial swing of things, that I've fallen so behind on WS. Over lunch today, I've been reading this thread and I love it - I love the direction in which its content is moving toward (more on that below) and congrats KCL on passing 100 pages! Here's to 100 more!
Just to cover a base or two: I sincerely want to thank everyone for your comments on my blog that KCL posted here. I believe that you've all understood that the content on it represents (and has always represented) the lighter side of this trial. I know some of it tip-toes on the line and I am certain that what I sometimes perceive as funny may not come across like that to others. (For the most part) I don't aim to offend anyone and to those who are compassionate human beings, no matter which side of the fence you are on, I apologize if I offended you.
I do want to say - if you find yourself offended by my posts, please contact me and tell me about it, as opposed to posting anything here. You can always PM me or contact me directly through the blog. Most importantly, I PERSONALLY created the blog and its contents and I am solely responsible for it. Just b/c someone recommends it, doesn't mean they are responsible for it. So again, please don't blame the messenger - blame the creator of your source of anger. And it's cool - you can vent it all out to me. Please just do it privately. Thanks.
While I try to inject a bit of humor into our trial lives, I read KCL's blog and I'm reminded why we need to lean on humor. I want to take this opportunity to direct something to you Kathy: Forget how hard it is to put your thoughts into cohesive paragraphs and forget how tough it is to figure out the technology it takes to upload your work to the internet. Forget how difficult it must be to find the courage to share your story, your sisters tragic story, your brother's situation. Forget all of that. I can tell you, Kathy, without a word of a lie, I don't believe I could go through what you have been through and be able to get out of bed in the morning. Every time I read about your experiences I am reminded that even when we are afforded luxuries in life, they can come at a significantly high price. I understand that when you lost your sister, you lost a piece of your soul and it can not be replaced. Kathy, if your blog and your words have taught me anything, it's that the piece of your soul is not lost - it's with your sister. Your sister took a piece of your soul with her so that she always has you there to laugh with and to cry with and to argue with and to sleep with. I also know that she has left a piece of her soul with you as well because you write and talk about her as if you spoke with her an hour earlier. I don't have this type of strength. You do. That's why we all read what you are writing and it's why we listen to what you have to say. Thank you KCL. There are no 2 other words I could better use to sum up my gratitude.
And finally, I had 4 grandparents up until I turned 15, when suddenly I lost 2 of them in the span of 6 weeks. Both being my father's parents. My grandmother passed away first and I remember the night after her burial, I was falling asleep and just before I went under, I felt a kiss on the back of my neck. I opened my eyes and I turned around to find nothing but air. In the remaining time I lived at my parents home, I never felt that kiss again. After moving out and spending years on my own, I found myself spending a night at their home a year ago with my daughter. My parents were going to look after her while I went out for the evening. I looked in on her when I returned that night and she was sleeping as she always does - sideways on the bed with her tush sticking up. I smiled and went off to sleep. In the morning, she came downstairs. I asked her how she slept, etc. and if I woke her up when I came home that prior night. She says to me "I woke up when you came to kiss me goodnight but you weren't there". Before I could tell her she was mistaken and that I didn't kiss her goodnight, I realized that she was in the exact same bed which was in the exact same position in my old bedroom. Very steadily, I asked her where I kissed her goodnight. "My neck" she says as she points to the back of it. And she walked out of the room as if something miraculous didn't just happen, leaving me with an eyeful of tears. Even sitting here typing this right now is causing the same effect.
On that note, I must get back to my boxes. Thanks again everyone for your comments on my work, especially my Juanisms. Once I'm settled in I will work on getting it on a T-Shirt.
J R O