GUILTY CA - Oscar Jimenez, 6, beaten to death, San Jose, 18 Feb 2007

  • #41
I'm in agreement. I don't believe that single parents should introduce their children to anyone they're simply dating. However, if they've been in a long-term relationship and honestly KNOW the person, then having them meet the child is fine.

When I was dating, I went out with a man who was wonderful (I thought.) After about a month, we went on a picnic with my daughter. We actually never made it to the picnic. She was four and kicking the back of the passenger seat of the car. He pulled over and raised his voice to her in a really scary manner. That was the last time I saw him, and I ignored all his pleas by email and phone messages to give him another chance.

There was one man who I met at my parent's house for the first time. The date was to be without my daughter, but she ran around the corner, saw him in the doorway and gave him a serious head butt in the stomach! I almost did something about it - but watched instead. He knelt down to her level, explained that he'd hoped they could be friends, but friends do not hurt each other, so he hoped she'd not hurt him again. Then he smiled at her, stood up, and we left for our date.

I think I fell in love with him at that point - without knowing anything else about him. :-) We ended up in a beautiful four year relationship that ended on peaceful terms. There are good ones out there.
 
  • #42
i would burn alive, be torn limb fro limb ANYTHING to prtect my kids. 99% of parents i think would agree. Any one who EVER touches my kids abusivley will certainly be sorry.

That's the way I feel. I would die trying if it came to that.
 
  • #43
Okay, while I do understand the sentiments, please people, don't go into other extremes. Yes, when you're a single parent you should be careful when you are dating, and your children should always come first. But there is a whole world of difference between being a responsible adult in this and letting the first Joe or Jane Homey move in after the second date and have him/her watch your kids while you're working one, two or three jobs. There are many, many more single parents who (eventually) date (again) and end up forming lovely new families than the freaks we read about on here. Sorry, had to get that off my chest.

Amen!
 
  • #44
Glitch, you are a very wise woman.
 
  • #45
When I was dating, I went out with a man who was wonderful (I thought.) After about a month, we went on a picnic with my daughter. We actually never made it to the picnic. She was four and kicking the back of the passenger seat of the car. He pulled over and raised his voice to her in a really scary manner. That was the last time I saw him, and I ignored all his pleas by email and phone messages to give him another chance.

There was one man who I met at my parent's house for the first time. The date was to be without my daughter, but she ran around the corner, saw him in the doorway and gave him a serious head butt in the stomach! I almost did something about it - but watched instead. He knelt down to her level, explained that he'd hoped they could be friends, but friends do not hurt each other, so he hoped she'd not hurt him again. Then he smiled at her, stood up, and we left for our date.

I think I fell in love with him at that point - without knowing anything else about him. :-) We ended up in a beautiful four year relationship that ended on peaceful terms. There are good ones out there.

My mother married my step dad when I was 7 and he adopted me. He was one of 2 boyfriends I ever met in 7 years. I love him like he is my real father and he loves my kids to death. There are good ones out there but it is just scary in this day and age that people choose men over their own children. I think we just get so sick of hearing it is the mother's boyfriend, when will people learn and not be blinded by wanting a companion so bad they would put their child in jepordy.
 
  • #46
When I was dating, I went out with a man who was wonderful (I thought.) After about a month, we went on a picnic with my daughter. We actually never made it to the picnic. She was four and kicking the back of the passenger seat of the car. He pulled over and raised his voice to her in a really scary manner. That was the last time I saw him, and I ignored all his pleas by email and phone messages to give him another chance.

There was one man who I met at my parent's house for the first time. The date was to be without my daughter, but she ran around the corner, saw him in the doorway and gave him a serious head butt in the stomach! I almost did something about it - but watched instead. He knelt down to her level, explained that he'd hoped they could be friends, but friends do not hurt each other, so he hoped she'd not hurt him again. Then he smiled at her, stood up, and we left for our date.

I think I fell in love with him at that point - without knowing anything else about him. :-) We ended up in a beautiful four year relationship that ended on peaceful terms. There are good ones out there.

What an excellent post! A great example of what can happen.
 
  • #47
My mother married my step dad when I was 7 and he adopted me. He was one of 2 boyfriends I ever met in 7 years. I love him like he is my real father and he loves my kids to death. There are good ones out there but it is just scary in this day and age that people choose men over their own children. I think we just get so sick of hearing it is the mother's boyfriend, when will people learn and not be blinded by wanting a companion so bad they would put their child in jepordy.

I am sick of hearing about these women also, I will never understand not protecting your child. I know it happens far to often but I just will never be able to understand it. I think it is fine for a good mother to date after divorce. I think the way Glitch went about it is ideal, she wouldn't put up with someone who couldn't deal with her child properly, that is what I would do too.
 
  • #48
Glitch, you are a very wise woman.

Thanks! I was waiting for someone to say "Your daughter head butted a strange man in the stomach and you didn't haul her off and punish her!?!"

:woohoo:
 
  • #49
I am sick of hearing about these women also, I will never understand not protecting your child. I know it happens far to often but I just will never be able to understand it. I think it is fine for a good mother to date after divorce. I think the way Glitch went about it is ideal, she wouldn't put up with someone who couldn't deal with her child properly, that is what I would do too.
i cant understand it either. kids are the most innocent among us and should be treated as precious as they are. so many times we hear about people that treat the safety of their child as a after thought. i just think how? how can you treat any child like this much less your own? no answer would be enough.
 
  • #50
Thanks! I was waiting for someone to say "Your daughter head butted a strange man in the stomach and you didn't haul her off and punish her!?!"

:woohoo:
i just figured she was little and they do strange stuff like that sometimes. if she still does it at 14 ....:)
 
  • #51
i just figured she was little and they do strange stuff like that sometimes. if she still does it at 14 ....:)

The strange things she does at 14 are so far and beyond stranger than headbutting - I can't begin to describe them! But... she's my whole world. (Though she will tell you that I am evil, if you catch her at the right moment.)
 
  • #52
Thanks! I was waiting for someone to say "Your daughter head butted a strange man in the stomach and you didn't haul her off and punish her!?!"

:woohoo:

If it was one of the guys visiting your bookclub meeting at your parent's house (just an example here :D) and she did that, I would have expected you to at least have a little talk with her I guess.... but since this was your date.... what better way to find out about his character than this way? You were very wise indeed!
 
  • #53
Here's another article --an interview with Little Oscar's dad.

the beginning of the interview:
"For months, there were the unanswered phone calls to his estranged wife, the worrying, the waiting by the phone, the wondering: Where was his 6-year-old son?
Finally, Big Oscar is getting Little Oscar back home.
But the two can't sneak into any more movies together, play around with the G.I. Joes piled up in the corner of Big Oscar's San Jose apartment or pretend they are superhero crime-fighters.
Now, Oscar Jimenez Sr. says, the fight for justice is about his slain son."

Link to the story:

http://www.contracostatimes.com/ci_6880103?source=most_viewed&nclick_check=1
 
  • #54
If it was one of the guys visiting your bookclub meeting at your parent's house (just an example here :D) and she did that, I would have expected you to at least have a little talk with her I guess.... but since this was your date.... what better way to find out about his character than this way? You were very wise indeed!


*shudder* A bookclub at my parent's house. I'd rather have a root canal!
 
  • #55
12/1/2007 - SAN JOSE (Map, News) - The alleged killer of 6-year-old Oscar Jimenez Jr. made his first court appearance in Santa Clara County today and could face the death penalty, according to Deputy District Attorney Jeff Rosen.

http://www.examiner.com/a-1079430~Alleged_child_killer_could_get_death_penalty.html

Note: This case appears to still be wending its way through the court system. Samuel Corona has been held without bail in Santa Clara County Jail since 11/29/2007. His next court date is 5/18/2010.
 
  • #56
3/6/2008 - SAN JOSE - A San Jose woman who watched as her boyfriend allegedly beat and stomped her 6-year-old son to death was sentenced today to a year in county jail after the defense argued she had been forced into submission by months of physical and emotional abuse.

Kathryn Jimenez, 38, was a devout churchgoer who led a largely sheltered life, and was "absolutely helpless to resist" the domination and abuse of Samuel Corona, deputy public defender Ken Mandel said after Jimenez was sentenced in Santa Clara County Superior Court.

http://articles.sfgate.com/2008-03-06/bay-area/17168488_1_son-hostage-visitation-dispute-son-s-body
 
  • #57
3/6/2008 - SAN JOSE - A San Jose woman who watched as her boyfriend allegedly beat and stomped her 6-year-old son to death was sentenced today to a year in county jail after the defense argued she had been forced into submission by months of physical and emotional abuse.

Kathryn Jimenez, 38, was a devout churchgoer who led a largely sheltered life, and was "absolutely helpless to resist" the domination and abuse of Samuel Corona, deputy public defender Ken Mandel said after Jimenez was sentenced in Santa Clara County Superior Court.

http://articles.sfgate.com/2008-03-06/bay-area/17168488_1_son-hostage-visitation-dispute-son-s-body

give me a break. is this the defense they all use now? barsi, garrido.......'we had no choice'. maybe not to save yourself.......but how can you let it happen to your own child???????????
 
  • #58

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