ME - If Under 14, All Sex Must Be Reported To The DA

[txsvicki]

I think if a child that young is having sex it should be reported because there is something really wrong and that these are very troubled kids. A kid could be vulnerable and coaxed into it by another that has been sexually acting out for years, a kid could have been sexually abused by someone and is acting themselves, etc.

 

[believe09]

I suppose my first comment came from the "band aid" feeling-what led up to the state of Maine jumping in with the pill I wonder? Condoms to me are common sense because barriers are barriers-std protection etc...but offering medication is an interesting leap, and I am curious as to who is taking the medical hx of these kids and deciding on handing out the pill?

 

[ziggy]

Some good thoughts Pedinurse but here's my problem: I REMEMBER BEING A TEEN OK? Even as a young adult we KNOW guys don't want to wear condoms. You think that changes with education? Ha! A guy is going to convince a girl who is on the pill he doesn't need a condom because she won't get pregnant, she's already protected. Guys are so horny = stupid. I know adult, mature men who are shocked when their girlfriend or some hook up gets pregnant because "she told me she was on the pill". Oh yeah, her word is her bond huh?

Anyway, you are right that teens are not responsible when taking the pill. Education is not going to fix this because it is THEIR AGE and lack of understanding true consequences and their coping mechanisms are to "just not think about it". They don't live in reality - they can't. REmember? We felt imortal and the pressure to be loved by a boy can be overwhelming to the point that we aren't thinking straight at that age in the heat of passion and the incredible intensity that comes with everything at that age.

I think it would be more important to have mandatory counseling to help these girls understand the empowerment of NO and why they feel this need to give their bodies to horny dudes at the risk of so many things; pregnancy, disease, possible sterilization from disease and self esteem and mental problems.

The womens movement and sexual revolution has harmed girls in this area imo. It's not fair that men/boys can have sex without as many consequences, especially the emotional ones, but life is not fair and when it's a female body that is able to bear life, then she carries more responsibility so we need to get that message out. We aren't equal in all areas.

Just because a minority of kids might have parents that don't react well to their sexual promiscuity doesn't mean all parents should have their hands tied. I'm tired of that minority bringing everyone down to their level. Let's teach them to rise above that.

 

[Wudge]

Just because a minority of kids might have parents that don't react well to their sexual promiscuity doesn't mean all parents should have their hands tied. I'm tired of that minority bringing everyone down to their level. Let's teach them to rise above that.

Did you really mean to imply that a majority of parents react well to a young teenage daughter who is sexually promiscuous?

 

[pedinurse]

Some good thoughts Pedinurse but here's my problem: I REMEMBER BEING A TEEN OK? Even as a young adult we KNOW guys don't want to wear condoms. You think that changes with education? Ha! A guy is going to convince a girl who is on the pill he doesn't need a condom because she won't get pregnant, she's already protected. Guys are so horny = stupid. I know adult, mature men who are shocked when their girlfriend or some hook up gets pregnant because "she told me she was on the pill". Oh yeah, her word is her bond huh?

hahaha

guys are horny = stupid. love it. :laugh:

let's take that equation and add (+ bc pills + 14 year old girls). that would = somewhat decreased chance of unintended pregnancy? right? maybe that's where they are coming from.

here's my thing. do you think they'd use the rubber if they were not on BC pills? i'm thinking prolly a no.

i have NEVER understood the "i don't wanna wear a condom" thing!!

but yes, i do think that education plays a BIG part. and believe it or not... girls are a lot more mature than the guys. and at the middle school age, they (both sexes) CAN comphrend, they are moldable, and they can understand the concepts of sex and STD's. and, MOST children respect hc providrers as an authority, and they listen and TRUST their HC providers. so, they (the healthcare providers) can make a difference!
so if you get these kids in there who want BC, give her the BC, teach her how to use it, but you push absteinence, barriers, healthy relationships... maybe you'll make a difference to her. so if the HC providers who are involved in this really make an effort... they can make a HUGE difference where they are at. Just my honest opinion there.

i guess i just have accepted the fact that i can't follow every 14 year old around all the time and make sure they won't get pregnant.

but i have to say... if my daughter was 14 and wanted BC, i'd flip out. i'll concede that!!! i'd freak out, lock her away without a key. homeschool her. she'd never ever leave my side. but right now i am looking at it from the "healthcare provider" side of the issue.

 

[CaliKid]

" Abuse also must be reported to the appropriate district attorney's office, Anderson said, when the suspected perpetrator is someone other than the minor's parent or guardian. "

So, if it's the parent or guardian, it doesn't get reported there?

:banghead: Oh, so it's okay if the minor is having sex with a parent or guardian.

I hope this was just really bad way of phrasing this sentence and not permission for incest. :behindbar

 

[SewingDeb]

It sounds to me like they deliberately excluded parents and guardians. Some states do give shorter sentences for incest and I will never understand that.

 

[pedinurse]

It sounds to me like they deliberately excluded parents and guardians. Some states do give shorter sentences for incest and I will never understand that.

yeah i don't understand that. maybe they have a separate law that has a harsher sentence for that? i don't understand... where they are coming from on that.

 

[SewingDeb]

But wouldn't it still need to be reported to the DA?

 

[IrishMist]

In my opinion, if a child of this age is having sex, they need a safe place to go for information and yes, even birth control. Somewhere that will give them straight up, honest answers, and without fear of being "turned in" to anyone.

From what I understand, this is not a concept just pulled out of the air. The school nurse has either 5 or 6 students that have this particular need. None of it is being forced on anyone.

When my daughter's were young, I told them that not having sex is their best bet. I explained how getting pregnant as a teen leaves you with three very difficult, life-altering choices.

I also made it very clear to them that they could come to me for birth control. If they weren't comfortable doing that, then they could go to my sister who was authorized to take them and not tell me.

The children that are allowed to be served by this clinic have to have permission by their parents to use the service to begin with. Personally, I think it's a sadder state of affairs if our society were to DE-volve to societal standards where women weren't allowed to get help. They were just sent away for a "long visit" with a distant relative.

I'd also like to add that it's a stereo type that it's always the boys that are trying to get sex and are always horny. There are quite a few young females that are aggressors, too.

 

[SewingDeb]

Baltimore has been doing this since the 80's and many states' schools have been doing it since the 90's. It's not new and it is because there is a need.

As a parent, I want to know any medication my children are taking and I think of middle schoolers as children, but I can see where there is a need and a child might be afraid for their parents to find out.

 

[pedinurse]

But wouldn't it still need to be reported to the DA?

had better be!

 

[SewingDeb]

Pedinurse, if it is not required to be reported to the DA under the law they quoted, I sincerely hope it is covered under another law. If not, the people in that state need to insist that it become law.

 

[pedinurse]

Pedinurse, if it is not required to be reported to the DA under the law they quoted, I sincerely hope it is covered under another law. If not, the people in that state need to insist that it become law.

I agree with you 500%. If it isn't, the people need to be screaming out what an injustice and disgusting thing that would be!!
I am betting the thing is that incest laws are MUCH more stringent than sex between consenting minors, and that is why there is a distinction. I bet that is what the distinction is, but the article should have said that is. That's my assumption, don't you bet that is probably the case?

 

[Wudge]

Pedinurse, if it is not required to be reported to the DA under the law they quoted, I sincerely hope it is covered under another law. If not, the people in that state need to insist that it become law.

When a D.A. must know what parents are not entitled to know, then in the immortal words of Pogo: "We have met the enemy, and he is us".

 

[mysteriew]

In theory I would want any sexually active middleschooler to have access to BC if they are sexually active. But I think it stinks that parents are not notified. BC is a medication and providers need to know medical history in order to administer it. Kids often don't know their own nor their family medical history. Also BC has side effects that parents need to be alert for. Did you know that many teens react to BC with depression? And early teens are especially suseptible to the side effects.

In theory I would want middle schoolers who are sexually active to have access to BC pills without having to go through the DA. But in real life- I can see incestous fathers telling their daughter to go get BC pills and to say that their boyfriend is the same age they are. I can see other adults telling the girls the same thing. And I can see school nurses accepting the answers without question, not paying attention to the quetions/answers to the questions or not even bothering to ask the question. (Please nurses don't jump me.) I have seen too many teachers blow off physical abuse of their students without reporting it. Not every teacher or every nurse- but some of them.

One of the ways a child who is being abused acts out is to become sexually promiscous or to begin having sex with others at an early age. So I guess that is why I think it is good that the DA told the school this. Since parents aren't allowed to be alert to what their children are doing, at least one more set of eyes are looking at it.

 

[pedinurse]

In theory I would want any sexually active middleschooler to have access to BC if they are sexually active. But I think it stinks that parents are not notified. BC is a medication and providers need to know medical history in order to administer it. Kids often don't know their own nor their family medical history. Also BC has side effects that parents need to be alert for. Did you know that many teens react to BC with depression? And early teens are especially suseptible to the side effects.

In theory I would want middle schoolers who are sexually active to have access to BC pills without having to go through the DA. But in real life- I can see incestous fathers telling their daughter to go get BC pills and to say that their boyfriend is the same age they are. I can see other adults telling the girls the same thing. And I can see school nurses accepting the answers without question, not paying attention to the quetions/answers to the questions or not even bothering to ask the question. (Please nurses don't jump me.) I have seen too many teachers blow off physical abuse of their students without reporting it. Not every teacher or every nurse- but some of them.

One of the ways a child who is being abused acts out is to become sexually promiscous or to begin having sex with others at an early age. So I guess that is why I think it is good that the DA told the school this. Since parents aren't allowed to be alert to what their children are doing, at least one more set of eyes are looking at it.

you have pointed out a serious potiental flaw. most middle school aged children do not have a serious grasp of their past family medical history. as providers, we try to get children to start becoming the primary historians at age 7. however the parent is usually there to fill in the gaps (much needed).
but in this instance, if you have a child coming in who wants birth control, but has a STRONG family history of clotting disorders, early blood clots, stroke, heart attack, ect, and the child also reveals to the provider "i'm smoking"... it would be concerning to the provider, and would effect the oral contraceptive pill choice the provider makes for the child. the provider might choose to not even put the child on contraceptives due to high risk. but what if the child didn't know that background or history? and what if the child didn't reveal habits such as smoking to the provider? that is scary.

i am wondering if they have the family fill out paperwork for the children at the beginning of the school year to use the clinic. but it would have to be updated frequently to be kept up to date.