Presumed dead relative, don't want to post name publicly - help?

[minutenoodles]

Can I make a post about a mysteriously deceased family member whose name I don't want to get publicly indexed?

Hi there, I've been investigating the death of a family member who (we believe) died mysteriously sometime around 2010.

So far, I've only discussed this with family members and a large but private genealogy group, as well as many departments in the locale where the relative died.

Someone in my genealogy group suggested I reach out to you folks for advice. But I have reason not to want to post my relative's name publicly at this time, so I'm wondering if it would be OK to make a post with the details but without a name, and only give the name over PM if someone wants to look deeper into it themselves? Or if there is a logged-in-only message board where I should post it?

A bit of context on where I've looked so far, in case it matters:

The presumed death occurred in the USA. We requested a death certificate from the vital records department, which found none. He has no grave that we know of, certainly not one in the local cemetery where his spouse was buried, whose office we have called and which has no record of him. We do know that the Social Security Administration investigated the death, as another relative who has since passed helped with the investigation (and received no closure (nor cared for any) as far as we know). I've enlisted the help of local librarians in the law department of the county's library who found no record of this investigation anywhere in the US in their database. The local Social Security office's phone number seems to have a problem at this time, as when I call it, I hear the first half-second of a recording and then get hung up on. I haven't been able to find a clerk who would have records on this sort of case, aside from the vital records department.

Is there a good place for me to post about this? Also welcoming advice.

Thanks for your time,
minutenoodles

 

[Marg from Oz]

His body would have been taken somewhere. That is if the really died. Who told you he died? Where did he die? What was cause of death? A funeral parlour would had handled it even if he was cremated. I am in Australia so unable to help you out. If there were more details I'm sure one of our wonderful sleuths would help you out..All the best in your endeavour.

 

[minutenoodles]

His body would have been taken somewhere. That is if the really died. Who told you he died? Where did he die? What was cause of death? A funeral parlour would had handled it even if he was cremated. I am in Australia so unable to help you out. If there were more details I'm sure one of our wonderful sleuths would help you out..All the best in your endeavour.

There are lots more details, just didn't know if this was an appropriate place to post those, or if I should make a post in the missing persons forum or similar.

We believe he died for a few reasons. First, he would be 112 today if he hadn't. Second, he was living with a guardian relative who was known for (and I'm told had been imprisoned for) committing financial fraud, including committing fraud to steal from this relative; when the SSA called to check on him, the guardian insisted that he couldn't be brought to the phone, over and over again, with very suspicious excuses, which is what caused the investigation to start. It's believed that the guardian relative was hiding my relative's death in order to continue to collect SSA checks. Some of us suspect my relative's body was destroyed or hidden before any officials got involved and was never found, but I don't know how realistic that is.

We would love to know the cause of death, but as no records have been found, including a death certificate, we don't know. We were really hoping to learn that from the death certificate. I would like to believe it was of the "passing away peacefully in his sleep" variety, but it could have been neglect or violent murder as far as I know. I'm not sure the body would have been in a state to learn this by the time it was discovered, if it ever was.

 

[minutenoodles]

(accidental post)

 

[chaz]

Can I make a post about a mysteriously deceased family member whose name I don't want to get publicly indexed?

Hi there, I've been investigating the death of a family member who (we believe) died mysteriously sometime around 2010.

So far, I've only discussed this with family members and a large but private genealogy group, as well as many departments in the locale where the relative died.

Someone in my genealogy group suggested I reach out to you folks for advice. But I have reason not to want to post my relative's name publicly at this time, so I'm wondering if it would be OK to make a post with the details but without a name, and only give the name over PM if someone wants to look deeper into it themselves? Or if there is a logged-in-only message board where I should post it?

A bit of context on where I've looked so far, in case it matters:

The presumed death occurred in the USA. We requested a death certificate from the vital records department, which found none. He has no grave that we know of, certainly not one in the local cemetery where his spouse was buried, whose office we have called and which has no record of him. We do know that the Social Security Administration investigated the death, as another relative who has since passed helped with the investigation (and received no closure (nor cared for any) as far as we know). I've enlisted the help of local librarians in the law department of the county's library who found no record of this investigation anywhere in the US in their database. The local Social Security office's phone number seems to have a problem at this time, as when I call it, I hear the first half-second of a recording and then get hung up on. I haven't been able to find a clerk who would have records on this sort of case, aside from the vital records department.

Is there a good place for me to post about this? Also welcoming advice.

Thanks for your time,
minutenoodles

Hi, welcome to Websleuths.
Have you checked for unidentified bodies in the general area?
If you feel more comfortable in a members only thread you can also go to: https://www.websleuths.com/forums/forums/the-jury-room.25/ It's not totally private but it will not show up on google searches. Good luck, I hope you will find some answers.

 

[lisaNYC]

You can try the social security death master file click search by name.

 

[minutenoodles]

Hi, welcome to Websleuths.
Have you checked for unidentified bodies in the general area?
If you feel more comfortable in a members only thread you can also go to: https://www.websleuths.com/forums/forums/the-jury-room.25/ It's not totally private but it will not show up on google searches. Good luck, I hope you will find some answers.

Thank you very much, I'll go post there. I haven't checked for unidentified bodies and don't know much about that; I'll ask about that in the other thread with a good big pile of details.

 

[minutenoodles]

You can try the social security death master file click search by name.

Yeah, that one is indexed in genealogy services so it's one of the first places I checked.

 

[minutenoodles]

Posted much more detail here: https://www.websleuths.com/forums/t...-dead-seeking-information-on-when-how.570011/

 

[Forumetiolo]

Hi, welcome! I understand the need for confidentiality. I read your post on another thread. Fortunately, a lot of comments have the right resources so good luck.