CO - Jessica Ridgeway, 10, Westminster, 5 Oct. 2012 - #23

[Nore]

I think it's going to be harder for the family than just living with what he did. I'd expect them to lose a lot of friends, and be treated differently by many, if not most, people. I'm sure there will be some who are being judgmental and feel like they had to know something but covered up for him, and others who worry that AS isn't the only one in the family who's a sandwich short of a picnic. I think that the biggest problem, though, will be people who start avoiding them because they just don't know what to say and feel uncomfortable about it. A lot of times it happens even with the family of a victim, but how do you go up to a mother and say, "I'm so sorry that the child you loved so much turned out to be a monster"?

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Confusion you are so right. Very often when you have grief people shun you. It happened to us. Our son wound up totally paralized after a blood clot stroke. Now that was not his fault but people turned away in droves!! They ignored us our DIL,and his daughter. After all settles down they will ignore Jessicas family also. All a person needs to say is " if you need to talk, I am here."
Some of our family stayed with us but not many.I have a small family now and it hurts..:seeya:

 

[kkdj]

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Confusion you are so right. Very often when you have grief people shun you. It happened to us. Our son wound up totally paralized after a blood clot stroke. Now that was not his fault but people turned away in droves!! They ignored us our DIL,and his daughter. After all settles down they will ignore Jessicas family also. All a person needs to say is " if you need to talk, I am here."
Some of our family stayed with us but not many.I have a small family now and it hurts..:seeya:

This story is so sad. I'm so sorry for your pain.
I think alot of people don't know how to react or what to do so they just avoid and go on with their lives as usual. Very sad.

 

[human]

AS apparently brought his brother to school everyday Why a 13 year old boy does not take the bus to school makes no sense. Is there no busing?

 

[johan555]

Serial killers worked Denver streets from '75 to '95, police say

"Sexual assault, strangulation and a desire to shock police were elements that drove the killer," said Marv Brandt, a cold-case investigator for the Arapahoe County Sheriff's Office.
"That person might be 60, still capable of finding more victims."

http://www.denverpost.com/serialkil...-serial-killers-worked-denver-streets-from-75

 

[mck16]

AS apparently brought his brother to school everyday Why a 13 year old boy does not take the bus to school makes no sense. Is there no busing?

Did he go to the same school as Jessica's friends brother? Just wondering if there was any connection. tia

 

[otto]

AS apparently brought his brother to school everyday Why a 13 year old boy does not take the bus to school makes no sense. Is there no busing?

Sometimes, there's something like a 1 mile radius around the school that is considered walking distance. Students outside of that area take the school bus. Students within that area can take city transit, if it's convenient, or the parents drive the children. My son's school closed and he was transferred the another school that was considered within walking distance. He wasn't familiar with public transit, I didn't want him crossing a 6 lane road or walking in the sometimes cold weather ... so I drove him to school through grades 7-9. It actually took him three years to figure out how to get to the bus stop on time and get on the correct bus. He actually ended up at the bus depot ... way on the other side of the city one day.

 

[human]

where I live it's a two mile limit for middle school and up.

Is the brother within some limit? I am map impaired so I can't figure that out

I still wonder how AS got to school and mother got to work

Maybe mother got a ride with someone or took the bus?

 

[stillwatersc]

Yeah, I agree. But maybe he wanted to be there. Austin Sigg's family and friends seem to be sticking by him, for some reason. Including showing support for him in court.

Which I don't really understand. Personally if I was the parents, I'd try to get the younger brother as far away from all of this as possible. But thats just me.

I agree. If one of my children did something so horrifying, I would certainly let the other children know everything but keep them away. If someone could do that to an innocent child, they are extremely dangerous to everyone, including their own family.

Also, IMO only a sociopath could do what AS did. He deserves no sympathy!

 

[Mustang Sally]

You know that a lot of "problematic" voices can be fixed nowdays.

I knew a girl who could not shout or raise her voice, she had something wrong with her vocal cords and they could not fix her because she lacked the necessary raw material, but other conditions such as ARS are a matter of a simple snip by a good surgeon.

I wonder if this was ever explored?

:cow:

ETA: link for voice surgery
http://www.nyogmd.com/2011/06/im-a-...igh-pitched-voice-is-there-anything-i-can-do/

Growing up (in the 50/60's Different World..LOL)..I had an uncle who also drove our school bus (1st to 12th ages)...He had a very high voice and sounded just like AS...Just before he passed away they did a procedure on him and placed a tube down his throat...When he recovered his voice was very deep...When he spoke the first time it scared him as well as family members..You just never know!

Dear God Please Bless & Give Strength to The Family of AS

Dear God Bless the Family of Jessica Christine Ridgeway!

 

[Cashew]

In that district there is a fee for the bus I think as well. We were discussing it earlier in the case RE:Jessica.

FWIW, the girl that was missing in Firestone has been found. She called her mom yesterday. I am guessing she was a runaway but I didn't see it posted anywhere....just that she was found.

 

[Feebot]

Growing up (in the 50/60's Different World..LOL)..I had an uncle who also drove our school bus (1st to 12th ages)...He had a very high voice and sounded just like AS...Just before he passed away they did a procedure on him and placed a tube down his throat...When he recovered his voice was very deep...When he spoke the first time it scared him as well as family members..You just never know!

Dear God Please Bless & Give Strength to The Family of AS

Dear God Bless the Family of Jessica Christine Ridgeway!

Could you tell me where to find the recording of AS's voice? THX.

 

[pinto]

AS apparently brought his brother to school everyday Why a 13 year old boy does not take the bus to school makes no sense. Is there no busing?

There was a fee for the bus, which is why Jessica was walking, IIRC. I don't know whether they were in the bus district or not, though.

As to your question about not taking the bus ... there are a lot of reasons kids are driven to school. Often (esp before daylight savings kicks in), kids have to wait in the dark for a bus to get them to a 7:30 am start. A lot of times it's just the route and how it works with your neighborhood ... I made my son ride the bus to high school, because they were the last stop on the route, and we would have had to leave the house at the same time whether I was driving or he was riding the bus. So that didn't make sense to clutter up the roads with another car.

But I drive my daughter every day, because they changed the order of the stops, and she would have to be at the bus stop at 6:20 am, when they don't even get to school until 7. That's crazy. They did ride the bus to middle school, because it was a little later, and they were the last stop, so they weren't on the bus that long. But they didn't ride it home, because they were the last stop, which meant they were on the bus at least 30 min, and it was quicker to walk home.

Hope that makes sense.

 

[otto]

There was a fee for the bus, which is why Jessica was walking, IIRC. I don't know whether they were in the bus district or not, though.

As to your question about not taking the bus ... there are a lot of reasons kids are driven to school. Often (esp before daylight savings kicks in), kids have to wait in the dark for a bus to get them to a 7:30 am start. A lot of times it's just the route and how it works with your neighborhood ... I made my son ride the bus to high school, because they were the last stop on the route, and we would have had to leave the house at the same time whether I was driving or he was riding the bus. So that didn't make sense to clutter up the roads with another car.

But I drive my daughter every day, because they changed the order of the stops, and she would have to be at the bus stop at 6:20 am, when they don't even get to school until 7. That's crazy. They did ride the bus to middle school, because it was a little later, and they were the last stop, so they weren't on the bus that long. But they didn't ride it home, because they were the last stop, which meant they were on the bus at least 30 min, and it was quicker to walk home.

Hope that makes sense.

Does school start at 7 am?

 

[passionflower]

Does school start at 7 am?

I see where pinto says 7:30 start

 

[csziggy]

AS apparently brought his brother to school everyday Why a 13 year old boy does not take the bus to school makes no sense. Is there no busing?

The younger brother probably goes to a school too close for busing. Early along, there was a long discussion about why Jessica was not taking the bus. Within a certain distance of the school there is not free busing available.

From the school system web site:

Because of increased costs and decreasing state and local financial support, Jeffco Public Schools will continue to charge students for school bus transportation in the 2012-2013 school year. Under a Board of Education approved plan, the bus fees are as follows:

All students who ride the bus to a neighborhood school will be charged $150 per child, per year.
Students who attend option schools will pay $200 per child, per year to ride the bus.
Choice enrolled students or students ineligible for bus service (those living within walking distance and/or beyond bus service) may buy a bus pass for $200 per child, per year, depending on space available.
http://www.jeffcopublicschools.org/transportation/index.html

 

[kkdj]

I read a news article today that said the BTK's brother felt for mom (Sigg's mom) as he too had to turn his brother in for murder after reading BTK's papers. I can't find it anywhere now. It was heartfelt and really told how a person feels turning in their own child or family member. Take it as rumor unless found...

I read that also.

 

[tlcya]

I think the article told about the unibomber, ted kazinski, brother turning him in. It was very moving and sad.

ETA link http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_2...other-understands-anguish-siggs-mom-must-feel

 

[tlcya]

With all due respect, I think you need to do some research on autism. Because you just don't understand it.

Basically you are talking about Dustin Hoffman's Rain Man being a serial killer. Sorry, not believable.

Respectfully, your opinion is yours and valid. Have you read the posts of confusion and several other members in this thread posted yesterday? I think they bring personal experience to this discussion. I think they, for personal RL resons, have done more research than many of us combined on the subject.

 

[tlcya]

I seem to know how to single handedly shut down a discussion. Not my intention. Backing out now. Maybe I need coffee.

 

[Confusion]

With all due respect, I think you need to do some research on autism. Because you just don't understand it.

Basically you are talking about Dustin Hoffman's Rain Man being a serial killer. Sorry, not believable.

I've lived with autism for close to 60 years now, and know several others with it in addition to those in my immediate family. Life isn't like the movies, and every person with autism is not Dustin Hoffman. In fact, I'd be willing to bet that very few are like what's portrayed in the movie. I'd suggest reading up on the autism spectrum, and you might be surprised by the wide separation between high spectrum and low spectrum, between those who were diagnosed early and those who were diagnosed as adults, those who received proper treatment and those who didn't, etc.

In addition to the time spent with my son, I have talked to many therapists about it, seen doctors at the autism society, heard lecturers about it, and read many, many books. Asperger's Syndrome was basically unheard of in the US until the early '90s, and I had read up on it years before his psychologist had even heard of it. In all of my research, discussions, experiences, I have never had a professional say, "People with Autism don't commit crimes; that would be like saying Rain Man was a murderer."

I personally don't have Asperger's, but my doctors have told me that (in spite of not exhibiting all signs of it) I would most likely fit the criteria for high-functioning autism. Some people with it self-medicate with alcohol and/or drugs. I chose a different way. As a teen, I bought books on reading body language and facial expressions, I practiced looking people in the eye by using a mirror (and it still took several months before I succeeded with the mirror for the first time), I read hundreds of self-help books, talked to therapists, got treatment for my anxiety and depression, joined a Toastmistresses group to learn to speak to people, used a tape recorder to help me monitor my voice well enough to be heard from more than 6 inches away, etc., etc., etc.

It took a lot of work and a lot of years, but nobody meets me now and thinks, "Wow, she must be autistic or something." I've had many people tell me how lucky I am that speaking to people comes so easily for me, and it takes a lot of effort to just say thank you rather than cracking up laughing. Funny thing is, the harder I work at it, the luckier I get! Anyway, to make a long story even longer... If you have done more research on it than I have, and you have evidence that I really don't understand it, I'll be more than happy to hear what you have to offer too. As my father always said, "You learn more from listening than you do from talking."