FL - Somer Thompson, 7, Orange Park, 19 Oct 2009 #31

[sadnpod]

Sad - thank you for sharing that touching story. I'm so glad for you that you had that last happy summer with your sister to remember her by. I had the same experience with my mother before she passed away. I know I will always cherish that last summer vacation with my mom - and I also know that wherever she is, she cherishes it, as well. BTW - my mom didn't want anyone looking at her after she passed away, either. She had a frank discussion with us about it beforehand - no viewing - and even though her friends didn't quite understand, we abided by her wishes.

I feel so sorry for ST that he didn't get to see his little one more recently before she was so brutally & unexpectedly taken from everyone that loves her. I hope he is finding some comfort in his friends and family and faith at this tragic time.

Sad - I have a quick question for you - how many people rode with him in the van from NC to OP when he came for her funeral? It's something I've wondered about, but just kept forgetting to ask. TIA!

Two. Both were longtime friends, they all went to school together. JH was one, she is his g/f now. Ive missed you sorrell, its so good to see you...

 

[ccane]

I have a question
Since the date of death has not been released does that mean there is not a death Certificate yet?
doesn't the funeral home need one?
I read the body would not be released on time for the memorial and funeral?
Has it ever been confirmed she was released
Does anyone understand the process in a case like this?

 

[ccane]

Even though my feeling is that the perp is a stranger...this has made me think that there is still suspicion on someone DT is close to, that LE didn't want to compromise the investigation by letting DT in on details of the final state of the body. I remember there was talk of the casket actually being locked, I'm not sure if that was verified or not. Maybe sadnpod has addressed that at some point.

Never confirmed but thats the understanding from the reporter

 

[sorrell skye]

Hi sorrell long time no see .. where the heck you been

Hey Cane - glad to see those pretty striped high heels again - I couldn't quite picture you in those pink skater shoes - but what do I know?! I like a little heel myself - it's hard to "strut yer stuff" in flats - specially when ya got somethin' to strut!!!

I've been in shopping hades - but I have risen, although empty-handed. Maybe everybody on my shopping list will just get coal in their stockings this year lol!!!

Just thought I'd pop in and see if there are any updates.

Any ideas, anyone? Any new RSO's we should check into?

 

[Kimberlyd125]

Hey y'all.
Just trying to catch up and wanted to comment on a few things.

I can not judge DT for not viewing the body. That is a personal choice that I hope I never have to make.

Also, a lot of people get rid of or change things around soon after a loved one has passed. I don't think we can say it's due to guilt.

IMO - DT has been judged for every move she makes or does not make since day one. IMO a lot of times, "we" talk about her as if she was a horrible mom. So far, I have seen no proof of that.

Sometimes that just gets to me. I would hate to be put under a microscope if God forbid something happened to my child. I don't think there is a "normal" way to act in times of crisis.

I pray for DT and everyone who loved Somer.

 

[ChickenPants]

Sad - thank you for sharing that touching story. I'm so glad for you that you had that last happy summer with your sister to remember her by. I had the same experience with my mother before she passed away. I know I will always cherish that last summer vacation with my mom - and I also know that wherever she is, she cherishes it, as well. BTW - my mom didn't want anyone looking at her after she passed away, either. She had a frank discussion with us about it beforehand - no viewing - and even though her friends didn't quite understand, we abided by her wishes.

I feel so sorry for ST that he didn't get to see his little one more recently before she was so brutally & unexpectedly taken from everyone that loves her. I hope he is finding some comfort in his friends and family and faith at this tragic time.

Sad - I have a quick question for you - how many people rode with him in the van from NC to OP when he came for her funeral? It's something I've wondered about, but just kept forgetting to ask. TIA!

Four years ago and I was with my mother as she died. She had been an extremely beautiful woman and her disease (and medicine) had made her very bloated and overweight which was a terrible source of frustration. As soon as she died, my grief reaction was to clean her up and put make up on her as she would have wanted it before they took her away. The next day when I came to the funeral home, they had her all scrunched down in the casket so her double chin showed, her hair was combed all wrong, the make up was all off and she was yellow.

The memorial service was starting soon so I asked my cousin to run and get my makeup out of the car (I always carry it) and I re-did her right in the casket and what was awful was I was trying to put lipliner and lipstick on her and her lips were all waxed, it was coming off in sheets and I was sobbing...(I could hear her in my head saying, "easy, easy...not too much" lol)

I finally got her re-organized and she looked SO BEAUTIFUL...everyone said she looked 10 years younger. Then I had to sing. No, death is not pretty. But I will always cherish that time even though it was cold and awful but I knew she was "gone" out of there, anyway. NOT TO COMPARE WITH DT AND SOMER, just sharing.

 

[sorrell skye]

I have a question
Since the date of death has not been released does that mean there is not a death Certificate yet?
doesn't the funeral home need one?
I read the body would not be released on time for the memorial and funeral?
Has it ever been confirmed she was released
Does anyone understand the process in a case like this?

Cane - AFAIK, if the exact time of death (hour, minute) is undetermined, the ME will record "unknown", but sometimes will give an approximation, based on forensic evidence.

 

[ChickenPants]

Never confirmed but thats the understanding from the reporter

Somebody addressed this issue earlier on and it was remarked that they close and lock caskets after these violent crimes because of the possibility that rag newspapers would be in there taking pictures.

 

[ccane]

Four years ago and I was with my mother as she died. She had been an extremely beautiful woman and her disease (and medicine) had made her very bloated and overweight which was a terrible source of frustration. As soon as she died, my grief reaction was to clean her up and put make up on her as she would have wanted it before they took her away. The next day when I came to the funeral home, they had her all scrunched down in the casket so her double chin showed, her hair was combed all wrong, the make up was all off and she was yellow.

The memorial service was starting soon so I asked my cousin to run and get my makeup out of the car (I always carry it) and I re-did her right in the casket and what was awful was I was trying to put lipliner and lipstick on her and her lips were all waxed, it was coming off in sheets and I was sobbing...(I could hear her in my head saying, "easy, easy...not too much" lol)

I finally got her re-organized and she looked SO BEAUTIFUL...everyone said she looked 10 years younger. Then I had to sing. No, death is not pretty. But I will always cherish that time even though it was cold and awful but I knew she was "gone" out of there, anyway. NOT TO COMPARE WITH DT AND SOMER, just sharing.

beautiful story thank you for sharing that.

 

[pinamia]

Four years ago and I was with my mother as she died. She had been an extremely beautiful woman and her disease (and medicine) had made her very bloated and overweight which was a terrible source of frustration. As soon as she died, my grief reaction was to clean her up and put make up on her as she would have wanted it before they took her away. The next day when I came to the funeral home, they had her all scrunched down in the casket so her double chin showed, her hair was combed all wrong, the make up was all off and she was yellow.

The memorial service was starting soon so I asked my cousin to run and get my makeup out of the car (I always carry it) and I re-did her right in the casket and what was awful was I was trying to put lipliner and lipstick on her and her lips were all waxed, it was coming off in sheets and I was sobbing...(I could hear her in my head saying, "easy, easy...not too much" lol)

I finally got her re-organized and she looked SO BEAUTIFUL...everyone said she looked 10 years younger. Then I had to sing. No, death is not pretty. But I will always cherish that time even though it was cold and awful but I knew she was "gone" out of there, anyway. NOT TO COMPARE WITH DT AND SOMER, just sharing.

Thanks. What a wonderful daughter your mom HAS. God Bless your mom for raising someone with so much love for her.

 

[ChickenPants]

Re: Judging DT

I agree with you and it has been very difficult for me trying to be fair and discerning here. If it happened to me I would end up in a psych ward, unless of a miracle.

The problem I guess I have is that, after the initial "crisis" passed, DT's demeanor was still and always the same in subsequent interviews: from sobbing to Dirty Harry if you know what I mean?

I had difficulty understanding how and why she did so many interviews, anyway. She always said it was to keep Somer's name out there and find the "it" who had murdered er. But, honestly, she never talked about Somer unless asked a specific question, and then she was often hesitant or gave very cliched answers about all of her kids, ex: when asked how the kids were doing, it was: "well...kids will be kids..." or "they have their ups and downs". The reporter would ask her a question about Somer and she would pause, and smile, and recount a little item like her being clumsy or picked on, hugging everybody, wanting to be a shoulder for everyone.... I just think that any time ANYBODY asked me a question about my murdered child, I would NOT be able to hold it together just thinking about (him).

Looking around to find any new information on the case, one cannot help running across posts from a variety of people - rumor or not - regarding husbands, boyfriends, drugs, custody battles, lack of arrangements for the kids, things said and done...interestingly, most of the information is negative. In fact I HAVE NOT READ ONE POSITIVE POST ANYWHERE ABOUT DIENA'S RELATIONSHIP WITH HER DAUGHTER OR HER OTHER CHILDREN. And this is after a month of following up. On the whole web. Searching for clues.

Yet there continue to be regular posts (including mine) urging people not to judge her and to forgive her alleged lapses in judgement, allow her to grieve in her own way, reminding us we would not want to be in her place.

I said it before, if someone tells you there is an elephant in the corner, and then tells you not to look at it, you won't be able to keep your eyes off of it.

I DON'T WANT TO JUDGE THIS MOTHER!!!

 

[pinamia]

Hey y'all.
Just trying to catch up and wanted to comment on a few things.

I can not judge DT for not viewing the body. That is a personal choice that I hope I never have to make.

Also, a lot of people get rid of or change things around soon after a loved one has passed. I don't think we can say it's due to guilt.

IMO - DT has been judged for every move she makes or does not make since day one. IMO a lot of times, "we" talk about her as if she was a horrible mom. So far, I have seen no proof of that.

Sometimes that just gets to me. I would hate to be put under a microscope if God forbid something happened to my child. I don't think there is a "normal" way to act in times of crisis.

I pray for DT and everyone who loved Somer.

DT herself said she feels guilt. I don't know which mom wouldn't under the circumstances. Even without the circumstances of neglect of 7 year old girl and her other children, moms feel guilt.

 

[sorrell skye]

Two. Both were longtime friends, they all went to school together. JH was one, she is his g/f now. Ive missed you sorrell, its so good to see you...

Hey Sad - good to see you, too!

Thank you for answering my question.

I'm glad ST had 2 good long-time friends with him as he made that long terrible drive from NC to OP. I'm sure it was probably the hardest trip he's ever had to make. Talk about "walking through the valley of the shadow of death."

ETA: Did you follow in your car - IIRC, you went to NC to be with with him after the tragic news, didn't you?

 

[sadnpod]

I have a question
Since the date of death has not been released does that mean there is not a death Certificate yet?
doesn't the funeral home need one?
I read the body would not be released on time for the memorial and funeral?
Has it ever been confirmed she was released
Does anyone understand the process in a case like this?

The body was released for the "visitation" and was buried the next day. The funeral home releases the death certificate, usually within a few days. The time of death is pronounced when the Medical examiner pronounces the date and time of death. No matter when it actually occurred. Cause of death can be homicide, or several other reasons that would be benign to the eye as to real cause of death.

 

[ChickenPants]

DT herself said she feels guilt. I don't know which mom wouldn't under the circumstances. Even without the circumstances of neglect of 7 year old girl and her other children, moms feel guilt.

Yes, and I cried when she said she didn't remember if she told her she loved her, put her hair up in ponytail, talked about being busy and mothers to take time to be with their kids...because you never know...and how she had thought she was busy when she really wasn't, etc. I felt so bad. It gave me roller coaster stomach.

And then she would kind of ... switch it off? She seemed to morph into a different person. Is it terrible to say I liked the mom who seemed sincerely feeling, but wanted to slap the mom that said, (meaningful pause and look directly into the camera, smirk): Look out, we're comin!

How is it possible to do that? Either you are one or the other - I have NEVER seen both at one time from the same person.

??????? Please help !!!!!!! ???????

 

[sadnpod]

Hey Sad - good to see you, too!

Thank you for answering my question.

I'm glad ST had 2 good long-time friends with him as he made that long terrible drive from NC to OP. I'm sure it was probably the hardest trip he's ever had to make. Talk about "walking through the valley of the shadow of death."

ETA: Did you follow in your car - IIRC, you went to NC to be with with him after the tragic news, didn't you?

He was visiting with me and my younger brother that lives in my house in NC on the day somer went missing. I was already in NC. I was with him at his house on wed when the body was found and identified by her birthmark and clothing. I returned to Jax on Friday of that week. He came on Sunday. I went to the services with him here and the service in NC. My car is too small to accomodate him and his wheelchair, so I couldnt bring him to FL.

 

[pinamia]

Yes, and I cried when she said she didn't remember if she told her she loved her, put her hair up in ponytail, talked about being busy and mothers to take time to be with their kids...because you never know...and how she had thought she was busy when she really wasn't, etc. I felt so bad. It gave me roller coaster stomach.

And then she would kind of ... switch it off? She seemed to morph into a different person. Is it terrible to say I liked the mom who seemed sincerely feeling, but wanted to slap the mom that said, (meaningful pause and look directly into the camera, smirk): Look out, we're comin!

How is it possible to do that? Either you are one or the other - I have NEVER seen both at one time from the same person.

??????? Please help !!!!!!! ???????

She's just shutting off those feeling. As sad as she feels for Somer and the guilt she has, the hate for Somer's killer is greater. She originally said she wouldn't sleep until the killer is caught. We'll we know that didn't happen.
Most moms are more sad so she presents a different grieving mechanism. That is because she didn't see Somer's body. She even says it in the interview how she sometimes doesn't believe it.

I do feel for her but it isn't easy because she does have strange ways about her. It seems a lot is about her when it should be about Somer.

I'm just adding to it so we should just go on about Somer unless we will just be looking at DT who I'm sure didn't do this. She played a role but it was that of being careless which a lot of parents are.

Now who would know Somer would be alone and who would Somer trust? Those are the true questions.

 

[sorrell skye]

He was visiting with me and my younger brother that lives in my house in NC on the day somer went missing. I was already in NC. I was with him at his house on wed when the body was found and identified by her birthmark and clothing. I returned to Jax on Friday of that week. He came on Sunday. I went to the services with him here and the service in NC. My car is too small to accomodate him and his wheelchair, so I couldnt bring him to FL.

Thanks Sad - sorry to ask about something that you've already posted about ages ago. I knew that you were there in NC, but it was so long ago, that I had forgotten the details.

I'm glad you were there with him - and gave him a place of refuge from all the media when they swooped in.

 

[txsvicki]

I thought it was dangerous for Diena to be publicly threatening the killer on TV since it's not known who did it yet. For all anyone knows it might not be just a pedophile, but some lunatic like BTK. To me, these types of threats bring needless attention the family of the victim and maybe even other neighborhood kids. I've only watched Nancy Grace, crime show programs, and read here, but don't believe I've ever heard a family member threatening the killer this way except for the woman who threatened Jeffrey Dahmer during the victim impact statements.

 

[camcneishg]

I drove by the home today at about 4....I saw the small silver car backed into the drive, and a big rust-red colored Chevy truck, nice one.....they were both backed in up next to the fence, blocking the garage.....Garage was closed....on my way home, at about 5:30, there were two big silver/gray trucks pulled up on the front lawn.....and the other two were still backed in....I saw no people.....just thought I would share....
sad, I have a question for you....if DT was offered after school care, free.....then doesn't this mean that the kids would also qualify for free lunches??? why would Somer carry a lunch box??