Anyone think it is strange that what's not in the letters is obvious. No questions to KC's "boys" about how the seaches for Caylee are going. I think that would be a hot topic to talk to your friend about. Very little about Caylee and when Caylee is mentioned it is suddenly without warning followed by a "Food Commercial" and then she continues and changes the subject. Sort of forced, maybe because the note from the other inmate mentions her children. Seems out of place to mention her child. Also KC does more drooling over this inmate which appears to be unnatural. She barely knows this person and yet becomes immediately "sisters" and "partners in legal crime". What is that? Legal crime, what does that mean? A crime for which you don't get caught????
~Sorry guys, this one's a long one~
I find it strange too. Not even strange, just sickening. She whinges about having to help Jose with the case? An innocent woman would want to do EVERYTHING she could to try to get to the truth of what happened to murdered baby girl- whereas KC only cares about exonerating herself and she doesn't even take
that seriously, talking about food, and God, taking a vacation and bit*hing about everyone and anyone/thing.
"Partners in legal crime" and " I suck at life sometimes and I'm not afraid to admit it. Can I go home now?" ....are the closest I think we'll ever hear from her regarding a confession.
I think she's knows she's not getting out- that the jury will find her guilty, but she just can't say those words herself. "I did it"
In one of the letters it sounded like her parents were trying to get her to admit to something, but she refused.
As for having an immediate super-close bond with Robyn- she was desperate. She felt like her blood family had betrayed her, along with all her friends on the outside. She knows everyone else hates her, and she needed
someone to hang on to....to prove that she can't be that horrible person everyone says she is if she still has ONE friend.
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Something else I wanted to share (which is pretty scary) is that I can actually relate to KC in a way. Not the me
now, but the me I was when I was a teen and in my early 20's, partying and having all sorts of addictions.( I didn't have kids of my own then). I'd lie my *advertiser censored* off to everyone and screwed over a lot of people- emotionally. (not finacially or physically)
I knew what I was doing was bad and wrong, but I was having so much fun, and it was all about ME me me. I knew there were consequences, but I pushed them out of my mind.... That was, until my lies unravelled and most of the people in my life turned on me.
Then all of a sudden everything was bleak and I blamed them- not myself. How could they all abandon me? Shouldn't they still love me anyway? Why didn't they try to do something to stop me, or to HELP me?
But I did feel guilty, even if I didn't admit it then. I convinced myself that I had Aids, cancer, all sorts of medical probs that would kill me.
Because the idea of dying meant that #1 people would love me again and feel bad for saying horrible things about me, and #2 because I was subconcioulsy admitting that I DESERVED to die for the things I had done. #3 was that dying meant I didn't have to deal with my issues.
And just like KC, I didn't go to get any testing done, because if they came back negative, then I wouldn't have that obsessive fear/guilt-invoking tool to use anymore.
But the major difference between KC and I is that I CHOSE to get the help I needed before it was too late. I admitted all of my wrong-doings and made amends. I got my together. :woohoo:
I didn't turn to God and expect that He would fix everything for me. I went to rehab, and continued to get therapy, and still do to this day. I apologized to all the people I hurt and have spent the rest of my days doing as much as I can to help other people to balance out the scales.
Oh, sorry, one other thing, she talks about hating the modeling thing and the attention being on her. That's classic SAD. (which I have) Nobody knew I had it, because I didn't talk about it, and alcohol and drugs changed that and made me LOVE attention.
Now that she doesn't have booze and pot to ease that anxiety, she's back to being very self- conscious. I don't think she's vain at all, I think she has VERY low self esteem....and part of that is just a part of her make-up, the rest is because she KNOWS she has done horrible, horrible things to so many people.
Let alone the murder of Caylee.... Notice how quickly she changes topic after mentioning Caylee, to something comletely mundane? She can't spend too much time thinking about her, or else she will start thinking about how she killed her. Much easier to think/write about the mundane. She just pushes all those ugly thoughts away.
Sorry to post about myself when this is about KC, but I couldn't help but notice the similarities, and wanted to share that insight.
All JMO.