Arizona girl, 2, left in car by father on 109-degree day and is found dead

[SMK777]

At those ages, he should have been playing WITH the kids!

Sadly, it’s too late now, but it really would have been better to hire a good child care provider and just let him be a stay at home dad for things like driving, housework, shopping, etc., or just being there as a supportive parent in the background.

Also if the mom had had a camera on the garage and driveway so she could check remotely if he was sticking to her directive to not leave them in the car.

It’s just so sad that the 2 girls now have a dead sister, a father headed to trial and incarceration, a grieving mother, and all the travel and fun spoiled. This case has really hit hard for me.

 

[SMK777]

I wonder how often this happened. Did he routinely put the toddler in the car when they were there at home without going out on grocery trips or such? Like every day.

It sounds like often, because:
1. In the texts, his wife said, How many times have I told you? [not to leave them in the car]
2. The 2 older siblings told police that their father left all 3 of them in the car often.
Sad to say, but he was using the car the way some people over-use a dog crate, from laziness and not wanting to have to deal.

 

[Herat]

A nine-year old is not a baby and can have considerable language and skills. That would be a 4th grader. I cannot fathom my parents leaving me locked in the car at that age, probably intended to secondarily babysit my siblings, while my parent hides out in the A/C house without me.

I would really think something was seriously wrong. That is NOT an normal way to treat a child.

 

[imstilla.grandma]

Right, not trying in any way to excuse his negligence, but I can’t imagine his knowingly leaving her outside for 3 hours leading to her death and his arrest. Purely selfish motives would prevent that, so I’m thinking he totally forgot she was outside…

His perception of time was off for some reason or another. Or he could simply be mixing up his lies with the inconsistencies Perhaps drugs or some aspect of his personality could have affected how he perceived time passing. Sounds like he was really zoned in on the game. I think he forgot about her being outside. Or inside. He fogot about the baby. He probably forgot all about his two other daughters too.

 

[MsMarple]

If this case ever goes to trial the defense will be interesting as the dad seems to be claiming he purposely left his daughter in the car but only for a half hour to hour and then “forgot” she was still there until mother arrived home and asked about her. Crazy. IIRC he claimed he never received the notification on his app that the car had shut off. Another lie? Certainly no defense.

IMO it was more about his reluctance to tear away from what he was doing, be it putting food away, playing on the PS5, making an alcoholic drink, whatever. As in telling himself he’ll get her “right after…”

So did he truly forget or did he respond when confronted by saying he forgot? Like little kids do when caught by a parent?

IMO he didn’t intend to kill his daughter but he didn’t put much thought into the consequences of leaving her in the heat either. IOW dad acted with no regard for her safety. What’s that term… depraved indifference? Send him to prison.
All MOO

 

[SMK777]

What’s that term… depraved indifference?

SBM
Yes.
Here’s another:

gross negligence

www.law.cornell.edu

 

[callmehenry]

Not on the surface, but if he lied about his credentials and job experience, that's a big deal.

Now that I would agree with. If he turns out to be a liar (and he did lie to LE as is proven by their records) then yes that’s a whole different kettle of fish

 

[KMouse]

I was a SAHM for years, and geez, I wish my life had been boring! I was constantly going places and doing stuff. My kids went to swimming lessons in the summer, little ones were in a preschool, for 4 hours a day.

I don't remember sitting around playing video games in the middle day.

Right? There was no 'me' time when my kids were young. By the time they were all in bed and everything was tidy and we were ready for the next day it was bedtime. I don't think I read a book for about 15 years.

 

[NuttMegg]

Sadly, it’s too late now, but it really would have been better to hire a good child care provider and just let him be a stay at home dad for things like driving, housework, shopping, etc., or just being there as a supportive parent in the background.

Also if the mom had had a camera on the garage and driveway so she could check remotely if he was sticking to her directive to not leave them in the car.

It’s just so sad that the 2 girls now have a dead sister, a father headed to trial and incarceration, a grieving mother, and all the travel and fun spoiled. This case has really hit hard for me.

I think both parents reveled in presenting the facade, a successful, good looking, softball coach, pillar of community.....Mr. Mom! And Mom herself is successful doctor. This was their image, just like we all project our best sides on FB, YT etc.

Really beautiful kids and parents, that family photo w/ all dressed in white: stunning.

But it's hard to keep up the show, his heart was clearly, imo, not in it.

I posted this days ago, I think the resentment caught up to him. She makes the dough and sends him texts....how many times have I told you....
I was married back when, no way either of us would dare to use that tone, as towards a child not cleaning his room.

He was abdictating his responsibilities, creating (imo) an alternative home online. In the gaming community where he could star in his own right. Or maybe other online communities where he could satisfy his yearnings. Imo.

He literally could not wait to start his many hours of gaming, couldn't wait long enough to bring the baby in to safety.

 

[SMK777]

I think both parents reveled in presenting the facade, a successful, good looking, softball coach, pillar of community.....Mr. Mom! And Mom herself is successful doctor. This was their image, just like we all project our best sides on FB, YT etc.

Really beautiful kids and parents, that family photo w/ all dressed in white: stunning.

But it's hard to keep up the show, his heart was clearly, imo, not in it.

I posted this days ago, I think the resentment caught up to him. She makes the dough and sends him texts....how many times have I told you....
I was married back when, no way either of us would dare to use that tone, as towards a child not cleaning his room.

He was abdictating his responsibilities, creating (imo) an alternative home online. In the gaming community where he could star in his own right. Or maybe other online communities where he could satisfy his yearnings. Imo.

Good insights and perception.
Yes, when you create a narrative but choose not to look at the cracks and the problems, it will at some point fall apart— in this case, with disastrous consequences.

 

[Ladyotm]

LE also said he had lied to them repeatedly, so no way to know what he actually thought, not a reliable narrator. He never checked on her in 3 hours was proved by video footage from neighbors.

Right. I don't believe he thought she had been brought in. This is where he began covering his axx.

 

[jdglove]

I live in Arizona. It may not be obvious to anyone who does not live here, but if you do you would never leave a child in a car in 109 degree even with AC running. You'd have to be mentally deficient or senile.

It sounds like he forgot the child, the child died, and he made up the story of having the ac on. investigators will find out.

Very sad. Horrible way to die.

 

[SMK777]

It sounds like he forgot the child, the child died, and he made up the story of having the ac on. investigators will find out.

Do you think maybe he’d discovered her dead before and waited for his wife to find her? Although I guess maybe that doesn’t make sense….just thinking…

 

[LifeIsAMystery]

I agree, the child must have made noise, as a parent how are you completely ob

His perception of time was off for some reason or another. Or he could simply be mixing up his lies with the inconsistencies Perhaps drugs or some aspect of his personality could have affected how he perceived time passing. Sounds like he was really zoned in on the game. I think he forgot about her being outside. Or inside. He fogot about the baby. He probably forgot all about his two other daughters too.

He was gaming while wearing a VR headset and drinking something that the police took the remains of for testing. Some reason or another was self indulgence to an astonishing degree. JMOOO.

 

[LifeIsAMystery]

Do you think maybe he’d discovered her dead before and waited for his wife to find her? Although I guess maybe that doesn’t make sense….just thinking…

I think he just avoided it all. The looking through the house seems fake to me, but JMOO.

 

[amaraya]

A

I live in Arizona. It may not be obvious to anyone who does not live here, but if you do you would never leave a child in a car in 109 degree even with AC running. You'd have to be mentally deficient or senile.

It sounds like he forgot the child, the child died, and he made up the story of having the ac on. investigators will find out.

Very sad. Horrible way to die.

Agreed. but the fact that he had done it before shpws he thpught it was ok- which is so wrong. I thinki he was drinking or smoking something (rehularly) and playong games to escape his responsibility and situation. Fatally irresponsible selfish and cruel.

 

[MsMarple]

I live in Arizona. It may not be obvious to anyone who does not live here, but if you do you would never leave a child in a car in 109 degree even with AC running. You'd have to be mentally deficient or senile.

It sounds like he forgot the child, the child died, and he made up the story of having the ac on. investigators will find out.

Very sad. Horrible way to die.

Do you think maybe he’d discovered her dead before and waited for his wife to find her? Although I guess maybe that doesn’t make sense….just thinking…

Great points! IMO everything’s on the table right now. Once the reports from the car’s computer and dad’s cell phone are complete we should have a better picture.

He’s already been caught in several lies so why should we believe anything he says?
MOO

 

[LifeIsAMystery]

I think both parents reveled in presenting the facade, a successful, good looking, softball coach, pillar of community.....Mr. Mom! And Mom herself is successful doctor. This was their image, just like we all project our best sides on FB, YT etc.

Really beautiful kids and parents, that family photo w/ all dressed in white: stunning.

But it's hard to keep up the show, his heart was clearly, imo, not in it.

I posted this days ago, I think the resentment caught up to him. She makes the dough and sends him texts....how many times have I told you....
I was married back when, no way either of us would dare to use that tone, as towards a child not cleaning his room.

He was abdictating his responsibilities, creating (imo) an alternative home online. In the gaming community where he could star in his own right. Or maybe other online communities where he could satisfy his yearnings. Imo.

He literally could not wait to start his many hours of gaming, couldn't wait long enough to bring the baby in to safety.

I agree re: resentment. "Sorry Babe!" in a text when you have murdered a child?!!! And then trying to smear her as a bad parent when doing so does not in any way help him and may further hurt the kids? Kind of burning it all down on his way out the door, literally. Then she manages to talk a judge into releasing him. Smh.

I fear his anger at the kids for ratting him out to cops as gaming. I fear neither parent is guaranteed to follow the order re: him not being alone with kids. The whole situation seems so tense and unstable, I fear what may happen next. The father dominates the dynamic and the mother focuses on him not the welfare of the kids in an effective way. I imagine those kids feel deeply unsafe. The dynamics have not changed but intensified in this scenario, IMHO.

 

[shesfixingherhair]

Also if the mom had had a camera on the garage and driveway so she could check remotely if he was sticking to her directive to not leave them in the car.

I hear what you’re saying, but, my God, if you have to have a nanny cam to make sure a stay-at-home dad isn’t doing something that would cause complete strangers to call 911…it just seems like he might as well not be staying at home? Idk. It’s just a low, low bar.

I mean. Paired with all the oblique references to him staying at home so that his wages won’t be garnished? I feel like that in itself would be such a red flag in someone I were casually seeing, how did his wife think that was marriage and family material? Never mind it getting to the point where she is probably bringing home a third of a million a year, and the idea of opening up his wallet is still that offensive???

 

[LifeIsAMystery]

Not on the surface, but if he lied about his credentials and job experience, that's a big deal.

Was there a link to him doing so? This thread is moving so fast, sorry if I overlooked it.