CA - 2-month old baby found dead in hot car - June 20, 2024

[SMK777]

Is there more to this story? Could the 2 yr-old have been sick and the dads were tending to him?
They had had the little girl long enuff to probably have a rhythm with both their children. Did something happen on that day/night that took them way off their usual to-do's?

Something was clearly out of the ordinary, for her to be unnoticed from 3 to midnight, and not even being discovered by the dads.

Were the 2 dads even home? They were not the ones to call 911, either.

 

[SMK777]

Two months is certainly long enough for the mind and body to develop a habit, but it's also a short enough time for the muscle memory from before that time to still be in place. So if they went about their day following what used to be their schedule and patterns from before this baby was adopted, I can see that happening.

I have a theory about these cases, at least the ones where the child was honestly forgotten about. My theory applies to the overall increase in these cases, not about any specific case. I'm thinking about how life has become so much more fast-paced, people try to normalize a certain amount of stress and to keep all their "balls in the air" by sheer willpower rather than by actually getting enough sleep, enough exercise, and having a life that doesn't exceed their mental and scheduling means.

At the same time I won't be surprised if it turns out there is more to this story. Even if my "stressful life" theory is correct, that doesn't provide an explanation for individual cases.

So sad.

MOO

Yes, the article said they had a large amount of pets, too. I know how tiring pet care can be, because I’ve kept large amounts of pets at times — and can’t imagine doing that on top of caring for a toddler and baby.

 

[MissMalowe]

Where do you suppose the babysitter (if that's who it was) had gone in the family's vehicle with an infant and a toddler in tow?

 

[SMK777]

Where do you suppose the babysitter (if that's who it was) had gone in the family's vehicle with an infant and a toddler in tow?

I wonder. Yes, the idea of someone babysitting was just a theory I had, due to her being unnoticed for 9 hours, and someone other than the parents finding her and calling 911.

IF there was someone babysitting they might have gone to a store, or a park. The question is, if they had the toddler inside for 9 hours, how could they not notice that the baby wasn’t there? Were they sitting only for the baby while the boy was somewhere else?
It’s baffling.

 

[SMK777]

Most stories where an infant is left in a hot car for 9 hours involves a parent going to work forgetting that the baby was in the car and supposed to be dropped at daycare. They find the baby in the car at the end of the day.

I’ve never heard of a case where the baby is left in the driveway that long.

 

[clorenc]

There have been PSAs on this in California in the past to remind parents to put their cell phones in the back seat next to the infant seat so they'll notice as they get go their destination.

The fact that humans are more likely to remember their cells phones than their children . . . says a lot about us.

 

[MissMalowe]

Yeah I'm super confused by this bc your theory of babysitting family member makes sense since it was a family member who discovered the baby in the car and called 911.

Yet when I think of loading up a toddler and an infant into the family car to run errands or something I think... why? Why do that if you don't have to? Why try to wrangle two kids in new territory rather than just staying at the family home if youre just babysitting for a short period of time?

 

[SMK777]

Yeah I'm super confused by this bc your theory of babysitting family member makes sense since it was a family member who discovered the baby in the car and called 911.

Yet when I think of loading up a toddler and an infant into the family car to run errands or something I think... why? Why do that if you don't have to? Why try to wrangle two kids in new territory rather than just staying at the family home if youre just babysitting for a short period of time?

Good question. Unless there was a specific need to pick something up. Or, on the other hand, something nefarious, like going to buy drugs.
Maybe the babysitting was for overnight.
Police never mentioned the dads being home.
Or maybe putting the infant out there because she was crying too much?
I’m baffled and I hope there are updates.

 

[Mistyjks]

Perhaps dads have two vehicles..not uncommon..and they arrived at home from any possible errand, etc…and “handed over” the kiddos to the “sitter” at the home…for whatever reason baby was left in the car..maybe dad #1 thought dad #2 brought sleeping babe in and put in its crib, and vice versa when in fact neither did. A quick bye and sitter just always assumed they were watching only the older child. Maybe dads called at midnightish to say..headed home, how are the kids and it was then all realized. A bit far gone, but not impossible imo. Sad.

 

[Inthedetails]

Perhaps dads have two vehicles..not uncommon..and they arrived at home from any possible errand, etc…and “handed over” the kiddos to the “sitter” at the home…for whatever reason baby was left in the car..maybe dad #1 thought dad #2 brought sleeping babe in and put in its crib, and vice versa when in fact neither did. A quick bye and sitter just always assumed they were watching only the older child. Maybe dads called at midnightish to say..headed home, how are the kids and it was then all realized. A bit far gone, but not impossible imo. Sad.

I'm thinking the parents had a date night and left the kids with the sitter. Maybe the sitter picked up the older sibling at daycare in the afternoon with the baby and then the sitter forgot the baby in the car, only to realize HOURS later what happened.

Just is speculation only!! I have no idea where the parents or sitter actually were. Just trying to make sense of why the baby was forgotten during dinner/bedtime hours.

I hope we learn more. For the time being, I'm assuming this was a horrible but unintentional tragedy, not something done on purpose.

jmo

 

[abyquinn]

I just don't get it... how are two people in the house for 9 hours and neither realizes the baby isn't there? No feedings? No diaper changes? No playtime? Snuggles? Wtf
From all accounts and photos on that daily mail article they seem like well rounded, mature, compassionate, caring people.
Even severely sleep deprived... HOW?!!

This makes no sense to me. They had been home & caring for baby for 2 mos. They didn't forget to drop her off at day care then work for 8 or 9 hours. She was forgotten in the car in front of their house! Jayson is a stay home dad according to the articles! She was forgotten during the busiest time of the day and then into the night! They must have missed 3 feedings, diaper changes, bath time possibly & bedtime! Did they think she was with Grandma? Did they think she was taking a good snooze so they never checked on her? That poor little angel. Those poor families. The bio parents who wanted her to have a better life. This is beyond horrible. Unless they press charges, we'll probably never know how this happened.

 

[GoBuckeyes]

A 2-month-old baby died June 13 in Santee after she was left inside an SUV for more than 9 hours.
San Diego doctors warn against leaving children in hot cars after Santee infant death

The newborn, Diana Sofia De Los Santos, was found unresponsive in an SUV outside the home of her adoptive parents at 12:20 a.m. on June 13, 2024, in Santee, San Diego.
[snip]
The couple took her home on April 11, after traveling to Arizona to meet her in the hospital.
Parenting, Baby Names, Celebrities, and Royal News | CafeMom.com

PICTURED: Baby girl who died after being left in hot car 'for hours'

lots of photos of the adoptive dad, 2 year old big brother and adorable baby girl at the Daily Mail link

heartbreaking!!!

 

[GoBuckeyes]

Most stories where an infant is left in a hot car for 9 hours involves a parent going to work forgetting that the baby was in the car and supposed to be dropped at daycare. They find the baby in the car at the end of the day.

I’ve never heard of a case where the baby is left in the driveway that long.

I have, but only when drugs were involved. And they would have already charged if that were the case here. moo

 

[Lilibet]

This is heartbreaking. They were providing such a lovely life for these two children. Their home looks so welcoming.

I have a young friend who also left her baby in her car, also in Santee coincidentally. It was daytime at a shopping center. She was in the store for 30 minutes and when she came out the police were there thanks to someone who saw her baby and called 911. Her baby had been removed from the car and was fine. She had to take a parenting class and there may have been other penalties.

My point is that she was an excellent, experienced mother with two older kids. She was devastated. Apparently her large family was visiting and she needed to run to the store. Her Dad offered to watch the baby while she was gone, but then decided not to for some reason, so my friend took her baby with her. In all the chaos, she was still thinking he was back home being watched, and she just got out of her car. She couldn’t believe she did it. I’m sure up until then she was someone who would say “I would NEVER forget my kid in the car.”

I’m sure the parents in this case would have said the same thing. Of course, we don’t know who left the baby until LE tells us.

This article explains how this can happen to anybody because of how our memories work.

Be Careful: Research Shows That Anyone Could Forget a Kid in a Hot Car - Consumer Reports

In this report on Forgotten Baby Syndrome, Consumer Reports says people who forget kids in hot cars is a common memory failure with tragic consequences.

www.consumerreports.org

This one is the experience of a mom who had been left in a hot car as a small child and years later her own daughter got stuck in the car while she was in the house getting the kids to bed.

I Thought Parents Who Forgot Their Kids In Their Cars Were Monsters. Then I Did It.

"How could I have done this? Why hadn’t I paid more attention? I hated myself."

www.huffpost.com

This really can happen to anyone.

JMO

 

[MissMalowe]

Just realized something that may have been a huge shift in their normal weekday routine.... that day (prior to her being found at 12:20am on the 20th) was a federal holiday, Juneteenth. Perhaps the working dad was home that day, and that created confusion and assumptions about which parent was handling which parental tasks that day?

The family member making the discovery still doesn't quite fit in that scenario though.

 

[Lilibet]

We spent a lot of time in Santee when we were full-time RVers from 2003-2011. My husband’s family lives in San Diego and there is a wonderful RV park at Santee Lakes Recreation Preserve. We’d spend several months there in the winter. This park consists of a string of lakes and is just a few blocks from where this family lived.

I’m quite familiar with the surrounding neighborhood and Santee itself. I found it to be a very unpretentious and friendly community. The homes near the lakes are modest tract homes built around 1960 like the one this family live in. A good friend of mine lives in one just off the other end of Settle.

Being well inland from the ocean it can get quite hot in Santee in the summer. I’ve been there when it’s been in the high 90’s. It was in the low 70s the late afternoon of June 19. We know cars heat up fast even at that temperature. The humidity was up in the mid-60% range. Ugh.

San Diego, CA Weather History | Weather Underground

None of this info is particularly important, but just my impression of Santee so you have the lay of the land.

 

[Inthedetails]

Just realized something that may have been a huge shift in their normal weekday routine.... that day (prior to her being found at 12:20am on the 20th) was a federal holiday, Juneteenth. Perhaps the working dad was home that day, and that created confusion and assumptions about which parent was handling which parental tasks that day?

The family member making the discovery still doesn't quite fit in that scenario though.

Very good thinking. Not only was it a holiday, it's a new holiday. In my family there was confusion about whether it was a day off for some family members, for example.

It's entirely possible the routine was different!

jmo

 

[SMK777]

Just realized something that may have been a huge shift in their normal weekday routine.... that day (prior to her being found at 12:20am on the 20th) was a federal holiday, Juneteenth. Perhaps the working dad was home that day, and that created confusion and assumptions about which parent was handling which parental tasks that day?

The family member making the discovery still doesn't quite fit in that scenario though.

Good observation. A change in routine is known to cause upheaval and forgetfulness about who is doing what, and when.

Yes, it’s confusing as to who this family member is; why they were there at midnight; why they were the one to discover the infant and call 911; and where the 2 dads were at this time.

 

[SMK777]

Perhaps dads have two vehicles..not uncommon..and they arrived at home from any possible errand, etc…and “handed over” the kiddos to the “sitter” at the home…for whatever reason baby was left in the car..maybe dad #1 thought dad #2 brought sleeping babe in and put in its crib, and vice versa when in fact neither did. A quick bye and sitter just always assumed they were watching only the older child. Maybe dads called at midnightish to say..headed home, how are the kids and it was then all realized. A bit far gone, but not impossible imo. Sad.

Yes, I’m thinking along those lines as well…..

 

[SMK777]

I'm thinking the parents had a date night and left the kids with the sitter. Maybe the sitter picked up the older sibling at daycare in the afternoon with the baby and then the sitter forgot the baby in the car, only to realize HOURS later what happened.

Just is speculation only!! I have no idea where the parents or sitter actually were. Just trying to make sense of why the baby was forgotten during dinner/bedtime hours.

I hope we learn more. For the time being, I'm assuming this was a horrible but unintentional tragedy, not something done on purpose.

jmo

Yes, this also would make sense. And although we of course don’t know that the dads went out or had anyone sitting, the fact that someone else discovered the baby and called 911 so many hours later seems to strongly suggest something of this kind.

Someone who had no experience taking care of a newborn and was unaware that there would be feedings and diaper changes during a 9 hour period. Or maybe they were sleep-deprived, and fell asleep for hours, not realizing so much time had passed?

I can’t imagine that this was anything other than a horrible, tragic mixup and error.

An article said police were investigating and trying to determine who was responsible for bringing the baby in from the SUV.