Desiree says Terri had “Extreme hatred for Kyron"

[cluciano63]

Its not impossible to talk about the emails, they exist, whats impossible is to pretend they are once again, dulled down and taken out of context to make Terri look bad. I think the LE are preparing the parents for a murder charge on Terri, they need to be braced and gently shown reality, thats just compassion.

Ya know, Drew Peterson was talked and talked and talked about for MONTHS before he was arrested, so just because it hasn't been an immediate arrest, it does not mean its never going to happen, because all indicators are showing thats where its going.

I said it is impossible for me.

 

[pufnstuf]

It's entirely your assumption that LE called the parents in to show them important evidence. We don't know that is what happened. I tend to doubt that it was because that would be improper and I am not prepared to demean LE by accusing them of acting improperly. More likely they were just doing what they were required to do to further the investigation by checking into and verifying information that they had collected.

"Desiree Young says on Friday police showed her emails that Terri sent to friends before Kyron's disappearance."

Start at .40 mark on this video: http://www.king5.com/news/Kyrons-mother-says-Emails-show-Terri-hated--could-hurt-him-108176524.html

 

[desquire]

The police are trying to find Kyron, its unethical to plant evidence, its unethical to bribe a witness, it is NOT unethical to show parents of a MISSING CHILD, what the defacto suspect said about him that indicates malice! Terri is NOT more important than Kyron or some Queen that needs to be bowed down and given all this courtesy!

Actually, it is improper - and a violation of every law enforcement agency code of ethics that I am aware of, including the Multnomah County Sheriff's Office - for LE to disclose confidential information gathered in the course of an investigation other than for legitimate investigative purposes. If private communications were obtained pursuant to a search warrant, disclosing them to a third party is even more strongly frowned upon. It's not a matter of bowing to Terri, it's a matter of preserving the integrity of the process and the prosecution. In sum it is about Kyron.

I can think of plenty of scenarios under which LE might have legitimately shown the emails to desiree and/or Kaine. Briefing the family of the victim on the conduct of the investigation, however, can be, and normally is, done without showing such evidence.

 

[pufnstuf]

Actually, it is improper - and a violation of every law enforcement agency code of ethics that I am aware of, including the Multnomah County Sheriff's Office - for LE to disclose confidential information gathered in the course of an investigation other than for legitimate investigative purposes. If private communications were obtained pursuant to a search warrant, disclosing them to a third party is even more strongly frowned upon. It's not a matter of bowing to Terri, it's a matter of preserving the integrity of the process and the prosecution. In sum it is about Kyron.

I can think of plenty of scenarios under which LE might have legitimately shown the emails to desiree and/or Kaine. Briefing the family of the victim on the conduct of the investigation, however, can be, and normally is, done without showing such evidence.

BBM... I agree... LE had plenty of reasons to share the email with Desiree. It's still an investigation; no one has been charged; so input from the child's mother in regards to the emails might be crucial. There's no indication that MCSO have jeopardized the integrity of the case by showing the emails to the mother. I'm certain that this isn't the first murder case that MCSO and MC DA have worked.

 

[miabellamoure]

Call me disgusting then and just about every other parent I know. Just last night I told my son I was going to smack him upside the head if he didn't clean his room. This morning I heard my secretary say that she was going to kill her daughter when she got home. Over the weekend a woman told me that her 3 year old could be such a manipulative little snot. Maybe Terri's statements were more serious than these, maybe they weren't. I'm sure that if I were Desiree, looking at such statements about Kyron through a prism of unbearable pain and loss, I would be hurt and appalled by them. But I'm not Desiree and I haven't seen the e-mails, so I prefer to save my righteous indignation for those things that I know to be, not those that I merely imagine to be.

I'll admit as a mother of five... to making similar comments in the past but, now that I am older and wiser, I've learned just how powerful those kind of words are & can hurt just as much as a smack upside of the head.

I pray in my next life (if I were to have children) I would refrain from that kind of verbage and handle my frustrations differently.

Must say I am in agreement with other posts, that unless those comments also include a missing child...it's a whole different ball of wax!

 

[SmoothOperator]

I agree 110%. Great post. I'm also wondering what it was about Desiree that she disliked so much? Terri and Kaine had been together for 8 years. What happened or why did Terri start to hone her anger in on Desiree and Kyron after such a long time?

It might be that Terri LOVED Kaine so much that she wanted their family to be just the three of them.

BINGO!!

I posted this exact statement ^above^ the first month of Ky missing.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[stmarysmead]

"More likely it was "We have some e-mails regarding the family and certain events/quarrells/issues in the months leading up to Kyron's disappearance, we'd like to ask you some questions about the events described."

But if these emails were just very normal silly venting...that no jury would ever see as anything but just what all frustrated Moms say...why would LE want to know anything about the circumstances surrounding them on that day?

If they are fluff and nonsense...what does it matter if Terri and Kaine fought over what to watch on TV?

How can these emails be both as normal as what we all say every day...and worthy of calling the parents in...to re-create the surrounding circumstances?

 

[ami]

Everything you said was pretty much my point. Until we know what the e-mails said, I'm not jumping to any conclusions.

Regarding the line bolded by me, the police only should have shown the e-mails if they had a legitimate investigative purpose in doing so, otherwise it would have been a breach of confidentiality and police ethics at the least. My assumption, then, is that to the extent they were shown to Desiree it was because the e-mails mentioned her or events connected with her and the discussion was necessary for the purpose of verifying facts related in the e-mails or understanding the context.

Yeah, but we have no idea if they obtained these from a search warrant, or if the friend who received the emails just handed them over when Terri became a suspect.

You'd know way more that I would how investigations are handled, but to me it makes sense that kaine and Desiree would be shown the emails to ask them if this was normal language for Terri when talking about Kyron to them, or to ask about a specific event she described (like seizures) to see if it was true, etc. Perhaps not so much just to show them something nasty or to rile them up.

 

[wvjules]

I'm sure Desiree sees what is said in those emails as vile and hatred towards Kyron, however, she is a grief stricken mother talking about emails that the person she believes to harmed her son sent. What TH said could have been vents described by desquire, or they could truly have been vile and hate as DY describes. Until we see them, we do not know which it is. I wish we could read them soon. Of course, I'm sure no one's opinion will change anyway.

 

[nosysw]

Exactly. I think the bolded line above is key. Terri only told each person what she wanted them to know, in my opinion. With everything taken together and now being able to look back on everything in it's totality it was clear Terri was a ticking time bomb. And in my opinion Terri is a dangerous woman and is a danger to all who are around her. She's NOT sick in my opinion. This is not the work of postpartum depression. Terri is just plain narcissistic and evil, in my opinion.

Unfortunately it looks like the world has another Casey Anthony on its hands. Only this time Terri is far more intelligent than Casey and it looks like she's going to get away with murder.

Above BBM:

I'm curious as to why you think she will get away with this JSR...

 

[grandmaj]

The subject of this thread is what Desiree claims the emails said that she personally read.


Do not personalize posts and do not ever put another poster or a group of posters in a negative light because you disagree with them. Post within the guidelines set for you. Do not vent about the rules on the forum.

Everyone please review term of service and please post responsibly.

 

[citigirl]

It is still not clear to me why LE did not show these emails to Kaine and Desiree earlier...what were they afraid would happen?

I would think it would have been helpful to get Kaine's take on the emails...considering that whoever received these emails must have been trusted by Terri. Kaine might have been able to help lead them to an accomplice or connect some dots...

 

[Michael25]

DY said she believes Terri transferred her dislike of herself (DY) onto Kyron. I didn't think of this until now...but why exactly does DY think Terri dislikes her? If anything, DY had every right to dislike Terri, no? Maybe she felt like Kyron should be with DY permanently, and Kaine said no, so she felt "burdened?" It would be interesting to know if DY was also mentioned in these e-mails.

 

[JSR]

Above BBM:

I'm curious as to why you think she will get away with this JSR...

Because child abduction cases are so different than if an adult goes missing. Especially without a body. Until they can procure Kyron's remains I don't think Terri will ever be charged. They need his remains. And I'm of the opinion that Terri handed off her phone to Dede so now LE has absolutely no idea where to go searching. I don't think she wanted them to be able to track her (and to locate the pings to go search for his body) And OR is a really easy place to hide something and have it never to be found.

Unless there's some evidence that can prove Kyron is no longer alive I don't see any charges ever being brought against Terri. She was smart. The fair was a perfect distraction and a perfect excuse that someone OTHER than her abducted Kyron. Terri isn't stupid and I think if she just waits it out and never speaks to anyone (i.e. LE) she will skate.

Which is incredibly sad. Because I feel that she did kill Kyron. I just hope that Kaine can keep her away from his only surviving child. In my opinion, Terri isn't someone who should ever be around children. Ever.

At some point Terri's reality will get distorted again and she will have to find someone else to blame for what she perceives as stopping her from having the perfect life. She's got a really bad combination of personality flaws that make her dangerous to anyone she's around. And that includes adults.

ADDED: Also important to note is that Terri it seems covered her tracks well. And as such I'm also of the opinion Terri planned this well in advance. I mean very far in advance.

All my opinion of course.

 

[nosysw]

Because child abduction cases are so different than if an adult goes missing. Especially without a body. Until they can procure Kyron's remains I don't think Terri will ever be charged. They need his remains. And I'm of the opinion that Terri handed off her phone to Dede so now LE has absolutely no idea where to go searching. I don't think she wanted them to be able to track her (and to locate the pings to go search for his body) And OR is a really easy place to hide something and have it never to be found.

Unless there's some evidence that can prove Kyron is no longer alive I don't see any charges ever being brought against Terri. She was smart. The fair was a perfect distraction and a perfect excuse that someone OTHER than her abducted Kyron. Terri isn't stupid and I think if she just waits it out and never speaks to anyone (i.e. LE) she will skate.Which is incredibly sad. Because I feel that she did kill Kyron. I just hope that Kaine can keep her away from his only surviving child. In my opinion, Terri isn't someone who should ever be around children. Ever.

At some point Terri's reality will get distorted again and she will have to find someone else to blame for what she perceives as stopping her from having the perfect life. She's got a really bad combination of personality flaws that make her dangerous to anyone she's around. And that includes adults.

ADDED: Also important to note is that Terri it seems covered her tracks well. And as such I'm also of the opinion Terri planned this well in advance. I mean very far in advance.

All my opinion of course.

Well that was a very thorough response! Thank you...I agree with so much of what you said. I never really thought of her handing her phone off to Dede although I'm sure it was discussed (couldn't keep up with these threads all the time and RL, lol)...I do hold out hope that Kyron will be found. Above, BBM: I don't think TH is capable of keeping this (or anything) to herself forever- she needs validation...and if she handed phone to Dede, Dede must know something so she would also need to keep quiet forever...I agree completely that she is a very dangerous person, given her narcissistic tendencies...I'm not sure she's that smart...More like "street smart" survival instincts to me...But that's JMO...she could be a diabolical mastermind...

 

[pittsburghgirl]

We haven't seen the emails.
We all know parents and stepparents and spouses that are struggling and having difficulties--and we know that it is possible that we might make judgments without having the courage to intervene.
We don't know what anyone might have said to Kaine in an attempt to intervene or whether Kaine would tell us if someone did.
We do know that Kaine was the other adult living in the house and clearly was not alarmed enough to intervene (although TH's biological son moving might have been a first step in trying to deal with her situation).
And, in general, I think normal people find it incomprehensible that a friend or relative could murder a child.

 

[JSR]

Well that was a very thorough response! Thank you...I agree with so much of what you said. I never really thought of her handing her phone off to Dede although I'm sure it was discussed (couldn't keep up with these threads all the time and RL, lol)...I do hold out hope that Kyron will be found. Above, BBM: I don't think TH is capable of keeping this (or anything) to herself forever- she needs validation...and if she handed phone to Dede, Dede must know something so she would also need to keep quiet forever...I agree completely that she is a very dangerous person, given her narcissistic tendencies...I'm not sure she's that smart...More like "street smart" survival instincts to me...But that's JMO...she could be a diabolical mastermind...

Diabolical. Interesting word choice. Unfortunately, I've long been afraid that Terri really is diabolical. I mean you would have to be right? To kill an innocent 7 year old boy because you thought he interfered with your rocky marriage? Or to kill a little boy in order to inflict immeasurable pain on your spouse and their ex-spouse?

I have such a hard time wrapping my mind around people like Terri or Casey Anthony.

I've been hoping Terri just snapped, but the more we hear about what allegedly took place I'm afraid Terri thought really long about how to carry this out. And frankly that scares the bejesus out of me. Because I want to think that Kyron didn't suffer, but I'm beginning to think he did. And that Terri made sure he did. <shutter>

 

[DreamyEye]

Call me disgusting then and just about every other parent I know. Just last night I told my son I was going to smack him upside the head if he didn't clean his room. This morning I heard my secretary say that she was going to kill her daughter when she got home. Over the weekend a woman told me that her 3 year old could be such a manipulative little snot. Maybe Terri's statements were more serious than these, maybe they weren't. I'm sure that if I were Desiree, looking at such statements about Kyron through a prism of unbearable pain and loss, I would be hurt and appalled by them. But I'm not Desiree and I haven't seen the e-mails, so I prefer to save my righteous indignation for those things that I know to be, not those that I merely imagine to be.

I agree with you. Some otherwise good parents say horrible horrible things to and about their kids all the time. For some people, using derrogatory language about kids, curse words, and terms of violence that they don't really mean gets to be a habit.

So if I hear a parent say something terrible, how would I know whether this particular parent in this particular case will follow through on some uglinesss that he or she has voiced? I'm apt to assume that the person is just venting or speaking in an overly dramatic way out of habit. It's only going to be after the fact, when something bad happens to the kid, that I'm going to feel terrible, knowing I should have taken that ugly remark more seriously.

Growing up, the mother of a friend of mine often said "I'm going to dip your head in a bucket of water three times--and bring it up twice." Eventually this got coded, and she'd just say "How would you like 2/3rds of a Baptism?" He went to college on a 4 year scholarship, majored in physics, and eventually got a top secret job of some kind with the government as a scientist specializing in physics. Obviously his mom was a good person overall and did a pretty good job of raising him. But the next time I overhear a parent saying something terrible like that, I'll think of TH now and wonder what I should do.

What should we do?

 

[DreamyEye]

Maybe I'm different. I've never called my son an ugly name to anyone. I've never told my son that I'd physically harm him, not even as a threat. I've never said that I want to kill my child, not even in jest.

I really loathe personal anecdotes on the forums here, because responses to them come across as a personal attacks. It's hard to counter someone who relays their personal experiences without sounding like you're attacking them. No personal attack is intended when I say this, though: I just really have to believe that there are a great many parents out there who threaten their children with physical violence, call their children ugly names, or say that they want to kill their children. I can honestly say that none of my friends or family have ever said such things to me about their own children, just like they don't say racist, sexist, or homophobic things to me.

Maybe it's because they know that I wouldn't approve, and I'd look at them like they were crazy.

Here in the U.S. there's a huge diversity of cultures, and when you leave your own home and your own circle, you quickly learn that not everyone holds to the same rules and customs that prevail in your circle. You are right--many people hold children sacred and seek to be constantly mindful not to be disrespectful. In many communities children are not belittled or made the butt of jokes, and the adults pressure one another to treat kids fairly, and to not use kids as scapegoats. Those are wonderful customs, and they're no doubt healthier. Still, their are families, communities, cultures out in this great country that don't place the same value on sparing children. These people are not all criminals, and most of them are good parents in other respects. It's just that their value systems are different--and especially their habits.

 

[Kimster]

DY said she believes Terri transferred her dislike of herself (DY) onto Kyron. I didn't think of this until now...but why exactly does DY think Terri dislikes her? If anything, DY had every right to dislike Terri, no? Maybe she felt like Kyron should be with DY permanently, and Kaine said no, so she felt "burdened?" It would be interesting to know if DY was also mentioned in these e-mails.

I've known a few women who don't like their husband's exes "just because", but not to the degree of killing his kids.