Emotional Toll

[Jacie Estes]

Now even worse details are coming out; bears and cartoon *advertiser censored* and who knows what is next. I'm going from sadness to anger to disgust back to anger and then sadness.

Norah Jones and Elmo

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-c3fvqNlFvc&feature=fvst"]Norah Jones Sings "Don't Know Why" on Sesame Street - YouTube[/ame]

 

[Reannan]

Just wanted to say Hugs to everyone.... tough case, huh? Hang in there, and stay strong - Susan still needs to come home.

 

[tiredblondy]

I am still so very angry. I know that is a normal emotion when something like this ocurs but I find it frustrating. I want to participate in the Powell threads. I find myself still too raw and emotional at this point. And this is not even a case I have been nearly as wrapped up in as some of the others. Dabbling here is what I have done.

So why this white hot, lava liquid anger I feel?

I just wish I knew what to do with all of it.

I feel so cheated on behalf of the Coxes. It wasn't enough to take their daughter. He had to take the boys too? The selfishness, the sheer hatred such an act must have taken. I don't buy for a minute that he knew the jig was up and just couldn't bear to be parted from his boys. BS BS BS

He knew the jig was up and he was no longer going to even have the illusion of control anymore. He wanted to exit on his own terms and to ensure that the Coxes and Susan's friends would not even have the boys to remember her by.

Sick, evil, awful little man.

TL this is for you... This anger is another coping mechanism that helps us focus our attention on someone or something else as a means of deflecting the pain.
http://stagesofgriefandloss.com/


To everyone,

We have seen some horrible horrible people and what they've done to children here. I usually don't cry but two cases have made me cry. Ethan Stacey and the day I heard Josh had murdered his children.

I have had to step away several times since then and still just reading this thread makes me want to cry. You guys make the difference. You are my family.

I think the anger and fury is because of the injustice of it all. We have seen pure evil personified in Josh Powell. When dealing with evil there is no rhyme or reason. We cannot comprehend it because we are not evil.

I had so much faith in justice.

I had suspected that his every move was being tracked. I don't think it was.

I was afraid for the boys but I was afraid he'd leave with them.

I don't understand why he wasn't in jail where he could commit suicide alone, without murdering his children.

I think about the men who drown their children just to get revenge on their ex wife. How is this poor excuse for a human being any different other than killing his wife? Why do those cases not affect me like this?

This case was like family to me. We loved Susan and all she stood for. I loathed Josh and his dad. Everytime I saw those two or one of them it triggered such strong feelings very close to hate and definitely repulsion.

Good against Evil, the age old battle. The day that this occured, it seemed like Evil won. Not so, as Kirk Graves said, Susan won the custody battle.

Susan was good and light. Josh was bad and darkness. He was the devil's child. Susan, Charlie and Braden were God's children.

It gives me comfort to know that those boys felt the kind of love they hadn't felt since Susan disappeared with the Mr.and Mrs. Cox. I love the picture of Charlie beside the picture of his Moma.

You and I know those boys should have been removed from Josh Powells evil posession a long time ago. It is even harder to accept that it wasn't done knowing what is coming out now. We convinced ourselves that the powers that be would never allow them to stay if it was so bad.

For whatever reason, our faith in those authorities in control ,who had full knowledge of everything we didn't, did not do what we felt should/could have been done. We were not ready for this. No one was.

But I know as strongly as I know my name that there were two precious souls carried to their Moma and Jesus before the Evil one ever lit that match.

We can't go back and change anything. It's over. Take the anger and use it to help make sure it doesn't happen again.

I just want to know two things; What can I do to help law enforcement and social services prevent this from happening again? How does one person have pictures like that on their computer and end up being arrested for child *advertiser censored* and another one not?


5 Stages of Grief
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

*sometimes the Anger comes after the Bargaining

http://www.livestrong.com/article/14684-stages-of-the-loss-process/



May God bless you all and give you peace and strength.

 

[tiredblondy]

It has been a long day and a very long week. I am grateful for the people here, it helps.

Amen to that.

 

[CHERIE.T]

This has to be one of the most difficult missing persons, murder cases I ever read about. I can barely follow it daily. Thanks to all who posted on this thread.

imho

 

[couggal]

Let me just say I cried for two weeks after Josh killed the boys. I have never been affected by a case like this one. That being said, last night I had a dream. There was only one boy in the dream, but I think that came from the fact that my little boy was laying in bed next to me and I could feel his body next to mine. I was loosly in on the police department's plan to rescue this boy from Josh's care. I gained Josh's trust and I was eventually allowed to go for a walk with the boy outside at which time I ran with him and rescued him. Josh was taken into custody and then he tried to escape. A police office shot him non-fatally. Then I shot him strait between the eyes. Then I woke up. I can't believe how much I care for Susan and those boys.