Fencesitters & Not Guilty Post Here

[narlacat]

 

[BloodshotEye]

Not sure why some here, feel the need to make such a vocal and strenuous objections to someone's post/theory/rant/opinion.

Hell, truth be told, I'm totally full of it. My theories regarding this case, are largely speculation. Good heavens, if there is the requirement that I refrain from snap-judgements, finger pointing at the usual suspects, speculating about motives, etc. - I will surely have to go somewhere else.

If someone wants to speculate that the McCann's were f-ing martians, and that they sold Maddie to extra-terra beings, I'm ok with that. If you want to speculate that their married life was crap, and they dabbled with swinging to re-capture their interest in each other, great. I don't necessarily agree, but who the f cares?

I very much enjoy all points of view. Wild speculations and weird theories. I would hate to see these posts, drummed out of here, simply because that's not "nice". This ain't a school yard, and we arn't gettin' gold stars for playing nice.

And that's all I'm going to say about that. - out

 

[colomom]

And if they AREN'T "swingers", which they probably aren't, what's the reason??

Did it really *never* occur to you that her tense look might come from her knowing she may never see her daughter alive again? Gee...I wonder if that would make a mother's face tense? Nawwww - it must be all that wild swinging sex she & her husband have been having that makes her so tense. I know wild sex with rowdy young doctors makes my mouth turn way down.

Shrinky - amazed at what passes for analysis here

The bit about K and G being swingers is just idle gossip- it is not a fact.

For what it is worth...

I know for a fact that the front office staff at the Ocean Club resort were absolutely convinced that they were there on a "swinging holiday" (their words).

Also Paulo Reis wrote (on May18th):

(http://gazetadigitalarquivo.blogspot.com/2007/05/em-directo-da-praia-da-luz-algarve-news.html)

Let me make one thing very clear: I watched the news and heard the words of Mr. Barra da Costa. I wasn’t the only witness of this interview. Around 1, 2 million Portuguese viewers (average number of viewers of “Telejornal”, main news of RTP) heard Mr. Barra da Costa saying that “a police dog found traces of the missing girl near the swimming pool of Robert Murat’s house”.
I have a link to RTP page, where they have the full video of main news (“Telejornal”). This afternoon, I talked with Mr. Barra da Costa, but he just told me that he had no comments about nothing for any journalist, as he says he was misquoted on a previous interview, also in TV. In that interview, he said that “there is information that the (McCann) couple was an adept of ‘swing’, meaning sexual relations among couples”.

(note: the report of traces around the swimming pool was false....maybe the statement about being mis-quoted was false also??)

I honestly don't believe that this "rumor" materialized out of thin air...do you?

 

[CaliKid]

Their behavior seems "off" to me too. A complete disconnect. As if they are able to merely compartmentalize various issues and events, very easily. Kate seems like a very conflicted person to me. Conflicted, because she has matriculated through the same, rigorous med school, residency program, etc., as her husband. Yet she is the one who must ditch her career as a doctor, and juggle the demands of these three children, while her husband is seemingly disconnected. Husband seems to compete with (or resent?) the attention given to the children. Very sad, perilous dynamic in that house.

BSE, I think you may have nailed down something about Kate that makes what she wrote in her diary so obvious. She has complained about how she must take care of the children herself while Gerry is off swimming and playing golf. But I think it goes much deeper.

Despite making allowances for the upcoming birth of Madeleine by changing specialties (switching from anesthesiology to being a GP), it sounds like Kate was frustrated about having to be the one to dial back on her career. I mean, she'd gone through much the same hard work and intense, expensive schooling as her husband. Her career probably meant as much to her as Gerry's did to him. Is it possible she secretly resented her children for taking it away from her?

 

[NK57]

I have seen parents like the McCanns over the years in my practice. From my observations of this couple from their earliest pressers right up until now, some of their actions have troubled me.
From the very beginning, early in May, I was somewhat suprised at their restraint when the search for Maddie commenced. One if not both parents would normally be so emotionally distraught that there would be the "hysterical" press conferences and statements. I never saw that. But then again,l I wrote it off as perhaps being a cultural stiff upper lip demeanor.Then I vacillated again to perhaps they were in shock.
I didn't follow the case nearly as close as you guys but I did find it a bit odd that they jetted off to see the Pope. Again, I was mildly curious about their seemingly cool demeanor. I seem to remember that Gerry was also here in the states and then that they both were seen in various European countries. Again, odd since most parents wouldn't be able to tear themselves away from where their child went missing from. Finally as the case took the turn of them being named arguido, did I read Gerry's blog and begin to really take a closer look at this couple.
Since I don't know them but have only observed them in the media, I do seem them as unhappy. Not the in your face "my kid is missing" unhappy but just generally unhappy with each other.
Sadly enough many young people have children for all of the wrong reasons. Whether you have them through IVF or the good old fashioned way once they arrive, children change our lives dramatically. If you have been a type A driven parent, given to bouts of perfection, once you have a kid or two or three, that perfection goes out the window. No matter how much you love them, face it, our kids are loud, messy, expensive and can be quite inconvenient. They get sick forcing us to lose time at work, they wreak havoc with our need to have contact with adults, and they have a way of coming up sick when we have busy lives.
Kate appears to me( and this is my opinion only) that she has been defeated. Defeated in not being able to compartmentalize her life they way it should be
(as others would see it). Her defeat could further be compounded by the fact that she may have had a special needs child with Maddie or that having these children was Gerry's wish and not hers. We may never know. At the end of the day Kate looks to me that she may have a type of situational attachement disorder. She doesn't look overly attached to either twin, and, she doesn't look that attached to Gerry. She looks at him with overwhelming sadness.
I'm not ready to convict either one of these parents. I do believe that they need/needed, parent training, and marital counseling. I also believe that if they are indeed responsible for the death of their daughter, it was an accident.

 

[SeriouslySearching]

I don't recall Kate's face being so "intense" until recently. I still can see her playing and smiling with the twins like she didn't have a care in the world early on. They do have many photos of her looking very much at ease.

After the tides turned, you won't find one of those, IMO.

 

[colomom]

I have seen parents like the McCanns over the years in my practice. From my observations of this couple from their earliest pressers right up until now, some of their actions have troubled me.
From the very beginning, early in May, I was somewhat suprised at their restraint when the search for Maddie commenced. One if not both parents would normally be so emotionally distraught that there would be the "hysterical" press conferences and statements. I never saw that. But then again,l I wrote it off as perhaps being a cultural stiff upper lip demeanor.Then I vacillated again to perhaps they were in shock.
.

I think you post shows logical, thoughtful and insightful thinking.

I appreciate that :clap:

 

[csds703]

Do you think that the lack of emotion could be medication to sedate them? I know that if my child were missing I would probably need to be medicated just to deal.
As far as their personal relationship, some people are just very reserved in public with each other. Add the stress of this whole ordeal and I don't think I would be paying much attention to anyone around me.
What do you think?

 

[colomom]

BSE, I think you may have nailed down something about Kate that makes what she wrote in her diary so obvious. She has complained about how she must take care of the children herself while Gerry is off swimming and playing golf. But I think it goes much deeper.

Despite making allowances for the upcoming birth of Madeleine by changing careers (switching from anesthesiology to being a GP), it sounds like Kate was frustrated about having to be the one to dial back on her career. I mean, she'd gone through much the same hard work and intense, expensive schooling as her husband. Her career probably meant as much to her as Gerry's did to him. Is it possible she secretly resented her children for taking it away from her?

Also, good thinking...IMHO. :clap:

 

[narlacat]

Just because that's what they think- it doesn't make it true!
The fact is there is no proof the Mc's are swingers.

Yep- that's how rumours start- out of thin air.

 

[ceeaura]

I think you post shows logical, thoughtful and insightful thinking.

I appreciate that :clap:

I second colomoms :clap: Very thoughtful post NK57

 

[KOOL LOOK]

I have seen parents like the McCanns over the years in my practice. From my observations of this couple from their earliest pressers right up until now, some of their actions have troubled me.

Very nice post. Hey, does it count I meant to say this? I agree with the analyzing and assessments you make concerning kate's behavior and looks towards her family. I sense and feel it too.

 

[KOOL LOOK]

Well, I don't want to destroy someone's public image, no. Don't you think though, in all honesty that pretty much the Mccanns are never going to be the same again? Their own choice, though it is sad, is going to haunt them because in the lest she went missing and is probably dead because of it. The worse scenerio is she is dead, by the hands of her parents. I hope not though.

If they were swingers, and they were doing it on Holiday with their children, shame on them. They've got the reputation they deserve, having received their consequences. In the same thought, though, I do believe in forgiveness, learning a lesson from your mistakes and having a second chance and a new beginning. I don't want it to destroy them, no I don't.

 

[Olivia77]

Hi Olivia 77,

This is a good start....

http://websleuths.com/forums/showpost.php?p=1666989&postcount=9

I will go gather some more links...BRB.

Thank you colomom!

 

[KOOL LOOK]

Nope, but I have a pocket book that says you'll have a good defense, maybe someone like Mark Geragoes, nahhhhhhhhhhh just kidding sweetie. :blowkiss: I nominate uhmmmmmmm we did actually have a member that was an attorney. I know Jeana DP and oh Lord, when she gets here and reads some of these posts, run for cover. She works for a legal firm.

Seriously, you have posted everything by the book, according to the tos and rules here. You haven't, pardon the pun, even rode the fence, even on this thread te he. You are well within your legal rights and rules of this forum to the best of my knowlege.

I will be demanding some RNR for you though after we have some answers. To be totally honest, you and a few others I've seen in this forum over the last seven years, are remarkable at reporting, posting and keeping us "Up to the Minute" from news sources all over this world.

Your prize is comin.

 

[BloodshotEye]

Was this meant for me BloodshotEye?

So sorry, Ceeaura. I guess our posts were back-to-back, huh. I didn't mean to make it look like I was replying to your post. Very sorry that it looked like that. Absolutely not...my comment was not ment for you, Ceeaura.

Please excuse my soapbox rant, Ceeaura ;] It just seemed like it was getting a little bitchie in here. As if we all got through the week, and waited to hear that, on a Saturday afternoon.

 

[Jeana (DP)]

I have to say that I'm very disappointed in you long time posters who certainly know better than to let a thread disintegrate the way this one has. If you received a PM from me, you are on notice and the next time you hear from me may be to tell you that you've received a time out.

If you're new to this forum and have any questions about what's allowed, I suggest you re read the Terms of Service that you agreed to when we accepted your membership.