Kyron's parents' statements, interviews

[waltzingmatilda]

Is it difficult to regain custody of a child if one allows the other parent primary custody during times of personal upheaval?

I am getting a very sick feeling in my stomach for our dear Kyron. It breaks my heart that this handsome little guy was in the middle of all this 'discourse'. He is just a little 7 (now 8) year old boy. How is a child to understand such things? Where is Kyron? Lot's of people are praying for your return Kyron!

wm

 

[Emma Peel]

Yeah, I guess. But I still don't see how knowing that Terri drinks too much or didn't "like" Kyron would aid in the search.
Most of us don't put all our garbage out for everyone to see until it's apparent we have no choice.
I think Kaine started off believing this was just a senseless kidnapping or a child wandering off and getting lost, and as more facts were brought to light, he began to see the whole ugly picture. I know I've had times in my life where I couldn't see what was in front of my face until I moved back a bit. Perhaps we're all a bit "farsighted" when it comes to our own lives?

I understand, because I really used to think the same. And I wanted to excuse it.

If I'm honest, I think I've stepped off more than one fence in recent weeks.

“I think that there will be things that come out of this investigation that will surprise you. That you’ll think about later on after it’s over. These are things I will tell you, when you ask me about the stresses that my staff is under and the other detectives and agency representatives are under, is that we have a knowledge of things that we don’t want to know about. ... "We have knowledge of things we wished we didn't." - Sherriff Dan Stanton

 

[jadejazzkayla]

]I just listened to the video & recall that she said "the choices he's made." Past tense. [/B]

These poor choices are glaingly obvious. Who allows their husband/wife to get drunk & pass out on the sofa and their baby up at all hours? Maybe it's just me that's finds it appalling - but then, I hate drunks. I ran a tight ship - if my hubbie had been a drunk he would've walked the plank!

for consistancy, in the interview dy says "I just can't stand by and support the choices that he's making." present tense.

 

[Adrienne37]

I can't imagine the pain that both Kaine and Desiree are feeling. The point of the matter is no matter what has happened, Terri and Terri alone is responsible for Kyron's disappearance. It's not up to us to judge Kaine's actions nor is it up to us to judge Desiree's actions. It's obvious that Terri's actions have spoken far louder than words and if you can cause a child to disappear because he is "interfering" in your marriage, then you've got a really serious problem. She sent her biological son to live with someone else, she caused Kyron's disappearance, and baby K would have been next. Thank God for the presence of mind that Kaine has had in protecting baby K from this deeply disturbed woman. I may not agree with all of the choices that he has had made, but he loves his son and he loves his daughter, of that I am 100% certain. I can't believe that it's so easy to continue to make excuses for this woman. I guess in reality when all is said and done, and everyone finds out that Kyron is dead and that she is the one that caused it, it will still somehow be Kaine or Desiree's fault. ~JMO~

 

[Emma Peel]

quote from dy:

I personally have learned of information lately that has disappointed me in Kaine's choices and his behavior, and I just can't stand by and support the choices that he's making.

-----------------

i would like to know what choices kaine is making that dy doesn't support. or if maybe she meant choices he made prior to kyron going missing, like saying on several occasions dy getting custody of kyron was "NOT AN OPTION".

I want to know what the information is. And the source of it - who gave the information to Desiree. Can't watch the interview yet. Was it clear she was speaking about the documents coming out of the divorce related proceedings? Or is this some other information and some other source?

Why would Desiree be getting this information at this time?

Are we closing in on an indictment? Has there been more GJ activity?

:waitasec:

 

[Aedrys]

So are we now blaming Kaine for what Terri did to Kyron? It's Kaine's fault his son went missing and is probably dead? It's Kaine's fault for the whole investigation not going faster to bring Kyron home? Is Kaine now to blame for everything?

Wow, such compassion is being shown to this man right now. I am utterly appalled. A few words from Desiree and Kaine is no longer the victim? What next, is Kaine to be blamed for Kyron's death too?

I think I need to step away from this thread. It sickens me to see such a rush of judgment against Kaine when Terri is the one that has done wrong against Kyron and Kaine. I am not blaming Kaine for Terri's actions.

 

[passionflower]

O/T Something LE KNOWS has come to a head.
All of a sudden divers back in water, search back on,
Desiree on GMA and now Kaine talking today.
Lots of action!
Maybe we will see an arrest of TH soon?
Bless Kyron and please find him..............so he can be layed to rest.
Yes I do believe he is in heaven, so sorry to write the words.

 

[BeanE]

Conflict between Kaine/Desiree statements re: red flags/crying

Desiree:

"Kyron became increasingly unhappy about not spending time with me. He wanted to come live with [me and his stepdad]," Young says. "Several times he would just break down and sob because he wanted to stay."

(This article has the video)

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20401700,00.html

She described "red flags," such as Kyron's increasing unhappiness with returning to his father and stepmother's Portland home after visiting his mother.

"He wanted to come live with us," she said. "Several times he would just break down and sob because he wanted to stay."

http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/07/kyron_hormans_mother_desiree_y_1.html


Kaine:

Q: What were the "red flags" or warning signs that Desiree Young thought she may have missed prior to Kyron's disappearance? Desiree told the Today Show that Kyron seemed increasingly unhappy when he left their home after his visits with the Youngs. Kaine, did you see any warning signs and if so what?

A: Desiree's quote was not taken in its entirety. As a younger boy, Kyron can express distress when going from one household to the other if he has been having a great time and is looking forward to upcoming activities with that particular household. There was no abnormal amount of this happening after he left Desiree's household or when he left ours to go visit Desiree. He has been unhappy several times when he has had to leave our house to go visit Desiree, nothing Desiree or I would deem out of the ordinary.

http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/07/kaine_horman_describes_how_ter.html

 

[mommyofthreekidz5]

So are we now blaming Kaine for what Terri did to Kyron? It's Kaine's fault his son went missing and is probably dead? It's Kaine's fault for the whole investigation not going faster to bring Kyron home? Is Kaine now to blame for everything?

Wow, such compassion is being shown to this man right now. I am utterly appalled. A few words from Desiree and Kaine is no longer the victim? What next, is Kaine to be blamed for Kyron's death too?

I think I need to step away from this thread. It sickens me to see such a rush of judgment against Kaine when Terri is the one that has done wrong against Kyron and Kaine. I am not blaming Kaine for Terri's actions.

I completely agree . When Kaine learned that Terri was even "possibly" a suspect, he immediately left and was not on her side . That speaks volumes .IMOO .

 

[Emma Peel]

I can't imagine the pain that both Kaine and Desiree are feeling. The point of the matter is no matter what has happened, Terri and Terri alone is responsible for Kyron's disappearance. It's not up to us to judge Kaine's actions nor is it up to us to judge Desiree's actions. It's obvious that Terri's actions have spoken far louder than words and if you can cause a child to disappear because he is "interfering" in your marriage, then you've got a really serious problem. She sent her biological son to live with someone else, she caused Kyron's disappearance, and baby K would have been next. Thank God for the presence of mind that Kaine has had in protecting baby K from this deeply disturbed woman. I may not agree with all of the choices that he has had made, but he loves his son and he loves his daughter, of that I am 100% certain. I can't believe that it's so easy to continue to make excuses for this woman. I guess in reality when all is said and done, and everyone finds out that Kyron is dead and that she is the one that caused it, it will still somehow be Kaine or Desiree's fault. ~JMO~

To be fair, I think Desiree has opened the door on the judging of Kaine's choices, and this has led to the discussion here.

And, I'm not sure how we could judge this to be Desiree's fault?

It appears Desiree simply didn't have the information she needed to understand the complete situation that created Kyron's unhappiness. Because it was withheld from her. Apparently. JMHO.

I'm thinking Kyron may have been targeted because summer was coming, he had big long vacation plans with Desiree on a houseboat, etc., and Desiree and Kyron would have had hours and hours together to talk about Terri. And Terri knew it.

I'm thinking Kyron was disappeared because he knew too much, perhaps he was becoming a little more assertive at home, "I'm telling Desiree, I want to live in my other house - like big brother left.", etc.. Perhaps in Kyron's awareness and unhappiness, he was somehow a threat to Terri, Terri's marriage, baby K's home. Just a thought.

 

[Kimster]

Tone it down please.

Remember, step-families are never a piece of cake. I was in one where my ex's side had a lot of issues. I tried to be the voice of reason and now I'm not married anymore because of it. It's not pretty. It's not easy. Before I came to WS, I was an active member in a step-mother board and after reading all the issues with hundreds of step-families, none of this surprises me except one thing, Kyron is gone.

I'm wondering if Desiree is going through the stages of grief - shock, sadness and anger. Is she in the anger stage? Who can blame her? My gosh, Kyron is so special to all of us let alone his own mother! She might even have remorse, though she was not in control of the situation. My ex and I spent many a day in an attorney's office trying to get custody of his son and it wasn't until the school called DHS were we able to do it. Oregon's stance is that you do NOT move a child from their home unless there is documented proof that it is not in the best interest of the child.

And I'm thinking Kaine really didn't think it was as bad as it was. I do not believe in a heartbeat that he would have kept Kyron just to be a control freak. And if he did, he has suffered a thousand times more than he should. This is his child and he loves Kyron.

 

[Adrienne37]

To be fair, I think Desiree has opened the door on the judging of Kaine's choices, and this has led to the discussion here.

And, I'm not sure how we could judge this to be Desiree's fault?

It appears Desiree simply didn't have the information she needed to understand the complete situation that created Kyron's unhappiness. Because it was withheld from her. Apparently. JMHO.

I'm thinking Kyron may have been targeted because summer was coming, he had big long vacation plans with Desiree on a houseboat, etc., and Desiree and Kyron would have had hours and hours together to talk about Terri. And Terri knew it.

I'm thinking Kyron was disappeared because he knew too much, perhaps he was becoming a little more assertive at home, "I'm telling Desiree, I want to live in my other house - like big brother left.", etc.. Perhaps in Kyron's awareness and unhappiness, he was somehow a threat to Terri, Terri's marriage, baby K's home. Just a thought.

I was speaking to the times that I have read on this very board about Desiree's choices regarding her illness and allowing Kyron to live with his father and then not trying to get him back when she was well. Those are the actions that I am speaking of.

Additionally, my point was this is not KAINE'S FAULT nor is this DESIREE'S FAULT. The only person to blame in this terrible situation is Terri for what she has done to Kyron. ~JMO~

 

[Emma Peel]

These are just our thoughts and opinions, and most of us here are trying to support them by sharing our thinking "out loud". We're allowed to express our opinions here without other posters telling us how we should think, or that our opinions are appalling.

In truth, not a one of us can actually judge Kaine or Terri or anyone else... we can just have opinions, and civil discussion.

ETA: I pushed my post button before Kimster our mod chimed in. TY Kimster. A reminder that things can always be painted back to grey from black & white and certainly opinions are well-colored by one's own experience and beliefs.

 

[jadejazzkayla]

I want to know what the information is. And the source of it - who gave the information to Desiree. Can't watch the interview yet. Was it clear she was speaking about the documents coming out of the divorce related proceedings? Or is this some other information and some other source?

Why would Desiree be getting this information at this time?

Are we closing in on an indictment? Has there been more GJ activity?

:waitasec:

bbm...

beane has transcribed dy answers in this thread post #34.

after dy says she can't support kaine's choices the news person says...

"Some of that has to do with those court documents that you've seen..."

then after after dy talks about kyron wanting to come live with her the news person says....

"Then on Friday the police showed you some emails that terri had sent to friends of hers describing her marriage to kaine and her feeling about your son..."

 

[Kimster]

These are just our thoughts and opinions, and most of us here are trying to support them by sharing our thinking "out loud". We're allowed to express our opinions here without other posters telling us how we should think, or that our opinions are appalling.

In truth, not a one of us can actually judge Kaine or Terri or anyone else... we can just have opinions, and civil discussion.

Exactly, which is why I asked everyone to tone it down. I know everyone is upset. I'm upset too. But we are here to discuss what happened and respect each others different points of view.

 

[BeanE]

These are just our thoughts and opinions, and most of us here are trying to support them by sharing our thinking "out loud". We're allowed to express our opinions here without other posters telling us how we should think, or that our opinions are appalling.

In truth, not a one of us can actually judge Kaine or Terri or anyone else... we can just have opinions, and civil discussion.

Well said, Emma. Thank you.

Making observations of people's actions, and even pondering and discussing why they took those actions, is certainly not "blaming" anyone for what happened to Kyron. It's just trying to figure out the dynamics and background that preceded it. Period.

 

[Kimster]

Thank you all for the positive feedback. Now let's get back to discussing the show. :grouphug:

 

[Aedrys]

But the mods have never given any permission to bash Kaine or Desiree, unless that just changed and I'm not aware of it. We can have our opinions, but we can't turn this into bashing Kaine for Terri's choices. She does not get a pass because Kaine didn't force her to change or didn't stop her from her destructive behaviors. The only one responsible for Terri is Terri. Period.

I'm all for a constructive discussion about this, not just pointing fingers at Kaine and calling him a bad man.

ETA: I didn't see Kimster's post until now. Sorry about that.

 

[eyes4crime]

Just listened to the video and my heart is breaking for Desiree.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/40192247#40192247

Holding up a united front for the sake of Kyron has to be difficult and exhausting when the united front is with the man who has lied to you during traumatic events in your life. Having an affair when you're 8 months pregnant and lying by omission regarding the state of your marriage and the care of your son...how does a mom deal with that?

Lying by omission has resulted in Desiree failing too obtain crucial facts regarding her son. Crucial facts that most likely would have given her custody of Kyron. How very sad this case is. All just my opinions and stuff like that!

 

[kappy50]

It would be intersting to know if Ms. Rackner, knew that Desi didn't know.