Lori Ruff Identified as Kimberly McLean of PA

[fred&edna]

I am uncomfortable with the speculation into KM's pre-FLEK life. We will never know these things, and further sleuthing can only hurt living family members. I would not blame the moderator if they locked the thread. She is deceased. Her identity is now known. She probably was never reported missing because she was of age when she left, and she left voluntarily with no foul play, telling family not to look for her.

Nothing more to see here, folks, time to move on.

We have many other unidentified people on this forum who could use our help.

I am curious, but must agree... we should move on.

 

[rascal32]

My brother in law disappeared from the family for about 5 years. He lived in a larger city, just moved to a different address and changed his cell number. We had no idea where he was or what happened to him. LE was no help because he was 30 years old. He didn't have social media accounts so we couldn't communicate that way. He loved to play pool so My husband drove the 2 hour drive several times a month for years going to the bars, game rooms hoping to find him. After 5 years his ex-wife and child found him through child support and gave us his phone number.
The reason why he never contacted family...he wrecked his car that his father co-signed on and thought he would be mad. Simple. This is a normal family. Not some horrible situation he was running from. There may have also been some mental illness as sadly last year he took his own life at just 38 years old after his new wife left him.
I tell you this because sometimes there is no big mystery. Sometimes people just act or do things that we will not understand. I feel for her family. If this had happened with our family it would be tough to read all the speculation about our lives. Currently I know some family members with a loved one missing. The buzz surrounding the family has not been kind. It is heartbreaking for them.
I agree with the last few posts... she has her identity back, let her Rest In Peace and let her family adjust.


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[scriptgirl]

No, I think it's shady that Lori's family didn't look for her or report her missing. What in the Sam Hill was going on in that household?? Speculation about her past life is legit because it is the reason she did all this mess in the first place.

 

[mrseeker]

No, I think it's shady that Lori's family didn't look for her or report her missing. What in the Sam Hill was going on in that household?? Speculation about her past life is legit because it is the reason she did all this mess in the first place.

The article said they did look for her. And she was not a missing person. She said she was leaving and left them a note not to come looking for her. The police would not look for you in that circumstance. She was 18 and free to never speak to them again. Her past life might not be the cause of anything other than she was 18 and very unhappy. We can speculate about all kinds of scenarios. Lot's of people walk away. Police will not look for adults unless there is evidence they are endangered. its just a fact. Most likely Mom just hoped she would come back in a few months after she cleared her head. What else could she do?

 

[Sherwood Park]

Through all of this, there arare 2 things that st stick out to me: one is the strained relationship with the stepdad. I wonder if there was sexual or mental abuse there. Is he even alive? Also, Lori's in-laws are a pain in the *advertiser censored*, esp that mother-in-law, who butted in at every turn. Lori's life was none of that woman's business and Lori owed her nothing. Lori was not obligated to share any info with her in-laws-her life is private, it's that simple. I don't gibe with the idea that in-laws have to know all about you and your life. Lori's mother-in-law should have just minded her own business.

It doesn't sound right that the Ruff family should "mind their own business" while hundreds of people on Websleuths and other sites spent years digging into the lives of others trying to figure out the true identity of FLEK.
The identity mystery has been solved and now Kimberly McLean's worst nightmare is coming true; people are digging into her life and privacy.
Kim's family life is none of our business.

 

[Brainy]

Yes, let it go folks. It was her life and she is no longer alive.

 

[Fukiyama]

Maybe a change of subject will help. I'm interested in this as a matter of curiosity.

I can definitely see using the phrase "give person X his/her name back" when it comes to identifying an unidentified body. But in the case of Lori, it just seems odd considering she had her new identity that she chose for herself and had purposefully left behind her birth identity. How does this work in all your minds? Just quibbling over semantics on my part?

 

[Cubby]

No, I think it's shady that Lori's family didn't look for her or report her missing. What in the Sam Hill was going on in that household?? Speculation about her past life is legit because it is the reason she did all this mess in the first place.

The McLean family are considered victims per TOS. This is a victim friendly forum. An ID has been made - case closed.

 

[SavetheQueen]

Maybe a change of subject will help. I'm interested in this as a matter of curiosity.

I can definitely see using the phrase "give person X his/her name back" when it comes to identifying an unidentified body. But in the case of Lori, it just seems odd considering she had her new identity that she chose for herself and had purposefully left behind her birth identity. How does this work in all your minds? Just quibbling over semantics on my part?

To me, she was Lori Erica Kennedy. That's who she went through hoops to become. She ran far, far away from Kimberly McLean, so I don't see that she was "given her name back". I see that her original identity was discovered and confirmed, and her biological family notified.

And, no, I don't feel this is case closed by a long shot. There's so much more to this story, but I doubt it's something for a WS forum. The questions that many have will probably be answered by an investigative author who writes her biography, old acquaintances that eventually come forward, etc.

Just my thoughts.

*All statements are that of my own opinion unless otherwise specified.*

 

[Magnum P.E.]

Here is a good case, coincidentally from Pennsylvania and about the time KM left. She was a passenger in a big rig which crashed and despite photos and prints, she has never been identified. Family may still wonder what became of her.
If enough eyes see her we could solve this. If anyone who was sleuthing KM's case wants to pitch in, you are welcome to do so. Note that there are only nine pages to read to get up to speed.

http://www.websleuths.com/forums/sh...ntown-WhtFem-20-40-in-big-rig-accident-May-86

 

[Tulessa]

It doesn't sound right that the Ruff family should "mind their own business" while hundreds of people on Websleuths and other sites spent years digging into the lives of others trying to figure out the true identity of FLEK.
The identity mystery has been solved and now Kimberly McLean's worst nightmare is coming true; people are digging into her life and privacy.
Kim's family life is none of our business.

^^^This^^^ :goodpost:

 

[llywrch]

To me, she was Lori Erica Kennedy. That's who she went through hoops to become. She ran far, far away from Kimberly McLean, so I don't see that she was "given her name back". I see that her original identity was discovered and confirmed, and her biological family notified.

Ditto.

And, no, I don't feel this is case closed by a long shot. There's so much more to this story, but I doubt it's something for a WS forum. The questions that many have will probably be answered by an investigative author who writes her biography, old acquaintances that eventually come forward, etc.

My suspicions about the story of LEK? She was a typical person who did something unusual for typical reasons. Maybe she was fleeing sexual/physical/mental abuse, but if that was the case I doubt anyone from her family would be willing to admit to that. Shame & loyalty to family runs deep. But I can see that if her stepfather simply didn't like her, that would be enough to lead her to break all contact with her family.

I was in her situation, a stepchild with a stepparent I didn't get along with. I thought about doing something similar to what LEK had done -- leave, break off all contact, maybe change my name -- but I didn't. There were many reasons I didn't go that far -- wanting to stay in contact with my father's brothers & sisters was one -- but I could have easily.

Then again, maybe the reason Kimberley McLean became Lori Erica Kennedy was something that happened to her in those undocumented months after she broke all contact with her family (1986) & she appears in Dallas (Spring 1988). But I agree with SavetheQueen: a forum on Websleuths is not where it will be solved.

Just my thoughts.

Mine too.

 

[dexter75]

Hope you get some sleep and feel better Dexter!!!
:therethere::balloons:

Thanks BCA😉❤
You're awesome!!

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[Chuz Life]

I am such a Johnny Come Lately to this thread. I guess I have a plate of crow to eat because I was so convinced that "Denise Sheehy" was a match and she clearly was not. Now, I have to apologize for pushing the idea as hard as I did. I always shared some of the concerns others had with the perceived age differences and the like. . . but I felt the match was still plausible. I'll be thinking of ways to stay mindful of my lessons learned with this case as I enjoy my plate of Crow this evening.

 

[tiffay01]

I am such a Johnny Come Lately to this thread. I guess I have a plate of crow to eat because I was so convinced that "Denise Sheehy" was a match and she clearly was not. Now, I have to apologize for pushing the idea as hard as I did. I always shared some of the concerns others had with the perceived age differences and the like. . . but I felt the match was still plausible. I'll be thinking of ways to stay mindful of my lessons learned with this case as I enjoy my plate of Crow this evening.

Can I just say that you shouldn't apologize honestly. We are all here because we want to help locate who she was. None of us knew who she was until the article came out about it. So I say no crow needed, that's the best part here we all bounce ideas and theories.

JMO

 

[Chuz Life]

Can I just say that you shouldn't apologize honestly. We are all here because we want to help locate who she was. None of us knew who she was until the article came out about it. So I say no crow needed, that's the best part here we all bounce ideas and theories.

JMO

Thank you so much for your kind words and understanding. This case especially has been quite an education for me. So many hours by so many people. I hope that Lori's (Kimberly's) daughter can have some solice, someday, knowing that our actions to identify her mother were always well intended.

 

[docbh]

I always felt like DNA could solve this one, and I'm glad to see it finally did. That having been said they were very lucky to have a 1st cousin match on 23andme or ancestry. In my experience I haven't found anyone closer than 3rd or more distant cousins in the few profiles I have looked at...

I shouldn't be surprised that so many of our wilder theories were off. it might be interesting to know what KM was doing in those 2 years before switching identities... but plenty of other cases to sleuth.

 

[toribreanne]

The contradiction here is that Kimberley just doesn't seem to fit the profile of a textbook runaway. Had she been the victim of physical and/or sexual abuse by her stepfather, conventional wisdom would indicate an adulthood marked by alcohol/drug addiction and sexual promiscuity. If I tended to doubt so many of the fanciful theories (running from a religious cult/human trafficking, etc.) it's because what I found most compelling about her story are the indications that she stayed in school, had no criminal record, and at least attempted (bankruptcy notwithstanding) to live within her means.

.

Just because she didn't fit the textbook abused runaway doesn't mean she wasn't abused. My childhood was horrible, I went through every type of abuse imaginable. But, I never turned to drugs, alcohol or promiscuity. It's possible Lori went through abuse but was able to pull herself together and make something of her life. Not everyone who's been abused is doomed to a life of substance abuse and promiscuity.


We will probably never know the real reason why she ran away.


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[cherrymeg]

Just because she didn't fit the textbook abused runaway doesn't mean she wasn't abused. My childhood was horrible, I went through every type of abuse imaginable. But, I never turned to drugs, alcohol or promiscuity. It's possible Lori went through abuse but was able to pull herself together and make something of her life. Not everyone who's been abused is doomed to a life of substance abuse and promiscuity.


We will probably never know the real reason why she ran away.


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Could she have changed her name without borrowing someone else's identity? It seems like a lot of work to get away from a family. At 18 she should have been able to legally disappear- her parents wouldn't have the right to know her whereabouts.

 

[fred&edna]

Could she have changed her name without borrowing someone else's identity? It seems like a lot of work to get away from a family. At 18 she should have been able to legally disappear- her parents wouldn't have the right to know her whereabouts.

I could be wrong, but I think a legal name change is public record... they aren't automatically confidential (or sealed).