GUILTY MS - Alexandria "Ally" Kostial, 21, Ole Miss student found dead, Harmontown, 20 Jul 2019 *ARREST* #2

[MemPat]

I thought the msn report of BT being released was telling.

And yes, it's very common for students to voluntarily drop out of rush.

MOO

It's important to remember though that Ole Miss is a university where Greek life is the be-all and end-all of social life.

A young man with no family history there probably chose Ole Miss for that life.

Why would BT choose to drop out of rush or pledging on his own?

A young man of great wealth would be surely be sought after.

I think a fraternity dropped him and the reason was extreme enough that no one else picked him up....MOO.

 

[borndem]

Maybe there's no bail hearing because Daddy made it clear he won't post it.

After all the years of entitlement for Brandon, perhaps murdering a coed is the family's red line?

"Son, now you're going to have to sleep here with these bad people eating bad food and wearing non-designer shirts.....al least for a few weeks and then we'll talk."

MOO

I think daddy is behind his son all the way. There will be a bond hearing, and the young'un will come home and all the world will be right again.

 

[borndem]

It's important to remember though that Ole Miss is a university where Greek life is the be-all and end-all of social life.

A young man with no family history there probably chose Ole Miss for that life.

Why would BT choose to drop out of rush or pledging on his own?

A young man of great wealth would be surely be sought after.

I think a fraternity dropped him and the reason was extreme enough that no one else picked him up....MOO.

Yes, ITA. He was probably such an azz that the frat or frats knew he would only be a negative to their group. He was probably flirting with brother's dates, drinking too much all the time, not going to class and making bad grades. Most colleges & universities look at the group and individual grades, etc. at each frat or sorority, and can take action if things get seriously negative. Dunno about Ole Miss.
Further, he was a couple of years older than most of them. I would imagine he just wasn't worth the trouble. Bucks or no bucks.

 

[MemPat]

Yes, ITA. He was probably such an azz that the frat or frats knew he would only be a negative to their group. He was probably flirting with brother's dates, drinking too much all the time, not going to class and making bad grades. Most colleges & universities look at the group and individual grades, etc. at each frat or sorority, and can take action if things get seriously negative. Dunno about Ole Miss.
Further, he was a couple of years older than most of them. I would imagine he just wasn't worth the trouble. Bucks or no bucks.

And don't you know they're glad right now?!

 

[Seattle1]

And don't you know they're glad right now?!

Yes -- I think they'll be citing the "example" of BT for years to come when training member chairs and leadership!

MOO

 

[borndem]

And don't you know they're glad right now?!

Ooohh boy, yes! Lots of "Whew, glad we booted him" type comments. And maybe a couple of "I told you so!" comments as well.

 

[Quill]

I thought the msn report of BT being released was telling.

And yes, it's very common for students to voluntarily drop out of rush.

MOO

Yes, and its also common for the guys to be released during rush as well. The pledging process for the guys is like night and day to the girls' process. The girls is more interviews and the guys, is well, you can imagine it gets intense. Some drop voluntarily and others just get dropped. I'll leave it at that.

It's important to remember though that Ole Miss is a university where Greek life is the be-all and end-all of social life.

A young man with no family history there probably chose Ole Miss for that life.

Why would BT choose to drop out of rush or pledging on his own?

A young man of great wealth would be surely be sought after.

I think a fraternity dropped him and the reason was extreme enough that no one else picked him up....MOO.

Lots of reasons for him to drop out of pledging on his own. Sometimes the list of thing they must do gets quite daunting and it is not for everyone. Imagine (hypothetically of course, since I have not myself been on the inside of this) someone with his apparent personality taking orders? Maybe having to do things that humiliate himself? I have a hard time imagining him following that through to the end. So, at the end of the day, I could see either happening. Based on some pictures I have seen, I would make a strong guess that he never actually completed the initial process and never officially joined a group. Its just my guess, though.

I agree that he likely chose the school based on the life advertised by the recruiters there. However, there are so, so many with wealth far greater than a doctor's son going through that process. Wealth is only a small part. Family name/reputation is equal or possibly an even greater asset in that process. He would be small potatoes and not to mention that they do their research, too. They knew more about him than we do right now. I would bank on that.

MOO

 

[marcolepsy]

Yes, and its also common for the guys to be released during rush as well. The pledging process for the guys is like night and day to the girls' process. The girls is more interviews and the guys, is well, you can imagine it gets intense. Some drop voluntarily and others just get dropped. I'll leave it at that.



Lots of reasons for him to drop out of pledging on his own. Sometimes the list of thing they must do gets quite daunting and it is not for everyone. Imagine (hypothetically of course, since I have not myself been on the inside of this) someone with his apparent personality taking orders? Maybe having to do things that humiliate himself? I have a hard time imagining him following that through to the end. So, at the end of the day, I could see either happening. Based on some pictures I have seen, I would make a strong guess that he never actually completed the initial process and never officially joined a group. Its just my guess, though.

I agree that he likely chose the school based on the life advertised by the recruiters there. However, there are so, so many with wealth far greater than a doctor's son going through that process. Wealth is only a small part. Family name/reputation is equal or possibly an even greater asset in that process. He would be small potatoes and not to mention that they do their research, too. They knew more about him than we do right now. I would bank on that.

MOO

If I go back 25 years and remember my "associate membership" in a national fraternity, the stuff you're made to do puts you in this stressful crucible (or what passes for stressful for an 18/19 yo) with the other new guys. In our case there were lame chores, being called at all hours of the night, being locked in attics, and lots of implied threats and dread that really just ended up being nothing but an elaborate theatrical thing that you laughed off at the end. No beatings, no violence - can't speak to what goes on at crazier houses (sometimes on our late night missions, we'd stumble across what some of the other fraternities were doing to their guys and we politely averted our eyes and minded our own business). But what I remember is being aware within the first day or two, which of those 15 other dudes was not pulling their weight and making life miserable for everyone else. A guy like BT doesn't sound like he'd rise to the top in a situation like that. He might have been disappeared by his own fellow pledges.

 

[Mito]

Actually, it's the narc/sociopath that hitches his/her wagon to our daughters and sons. They are frauds, and seek to associate and be connected to the respected, loved, and model student here as a means to elevate themselves.

The narc/socio introduction is masterful, and initial love bombing is pure manipulation in the greatest sense. And victims spend most of the relationship trying to get that charming, interested, attentive, person back.

Narc/socio also won't like your friends, or want to be around them as they are afraid of being exposed.

I've no doubt that Ally walked away more than once during the last 3 years only to be reeled back in by BT's false, manipulating self. Countless quotes how BT took advantage of Ally, and led her on -- apparent to everybody but Ally. He was a powerful drug to her.

In addition to teaching our sons and daughters to stay away from the disordered, it's very important to make them aware of the tell tale signs of narcissism before they begin dating.

Most recent case I can think of was TN high school student Emma Walker shot while she slept after breaking up with her boyfriend. Her parents working to make signs of unhealthy relationships HS curriculum.

MOO

I too believe this should be part of the HS curriculum. My ex, father of my children, is definitely an abusive narc. I never knew these folks existed and I am much older than this poor girl. I spent hours googling trying to figure out why my ex was like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. When I discovered NPD finally I knew why my life was sooooo awful. I thought it was bad moods, or I was not doing things right, I believed everyone had a heart and he would change. My ex is still beloved and goes about charming everyone in town. The rage they show their victims is carefully hidden and they convince you that you caused it. As long as you believe the "sweet person" is the real person you are at risk. The sweet person does not exist- it is only used to lure in the unsuspecting person. I still appease mine to a high degree to avoid triggering him. My friends say "tell him to F off!" to do that I believe is to risk bringing harm to myself or my children. They can not have their ego bruised even a tiny tiny bit of shame or embarrassment will set them off on a path of revenge.

 

[borndem]

Stay strong, stay aware, and remember that you and your children outrank him in every category that is good and loving.
And,

Welcome to Websleuths,
Mito !!​

 

[afitzy]

It's important to remember though that Ole Miss is a university where Greek life is the be-all and end-all of social life.

A young man with no family history there probably chose Ole Miss for that life.

Why would BT choose to drop out of rush or pledging on his own?

A young man of great wealth would be surely be sought after.

I think a fraternity dropped him and the reason was extreme enough that no one else picked him up....MOO.

Perhaps grades were the issue too with his initiation in the fraternity. According to this article from NBC:

Fort Worth Man Charged With Killing Ole Miss Student

Quotes from article:

Theesfeld, NBC 5 has learned, attended Fort Worth Country Day School from 2012 to 2014, but after his sophomore year did not return for "academic reasons," [BBM] according to the private, college prep school. From there, Theesfeld attended and graduated from the San Marcos Academy in San Marcos in 2016.

Here is some info on San Marcos Academy:
San Marcos Academy Profile (2018-19) | San Marcos, TX

Here is some info on FWCD:
Explore Fort Worth Country Day School

 

[MemPat]

Perhaps grades were the issue too with his initiation in the fraternity. According to this article from NBC:

Fort Worth Man Charged With Killing Ole Miss Student

Quotes from article:

Theesfeld, NBC 5 has learned, attended Fort Worth Country Day School from 2012 to 2014, but after his sophomore year did not return for "academic reasons," [BBM] according to the private, college prep school. From there, Theesfeld attended and graduated from the San Marcos Academy in San Marcos in 2016.

Here is some info on San Marcos Academy:
San Marcos Academy Profile (2018-19) | San Marcos, TX

Here is some info on FWCD:
Explore Fort Worth Country Day School

I don't believe for a minute that Brandon was kicked out of FW Country Day for academic reasons alone.

If that was the case there are a number of other private schools he could have attended while remaining at home in Ft. Worth.

Whatever his behavior it was egregious enough that neither set of parents wanted him in their homes.

About the fraternities, they have all sorts of interventions for brothers who aren't making the grade...tutors, study sessions, etc.
If he was a good, socially acceptable guy, they would have found a way to keep him.

 

[afitzy]

In doing a bit of research on current police events in Oxford, MS I came across a recent case of a Oxford police officer (now former) who is accused of murdering a mother of 4 (Dominque Clayton) via gunshots to the head with whom he was in a relationship.

The details surrounding this case are many and complex but the case has prompted a review of the Oxford PD by the MS AG Office. Oxford mayor says state investigating police department as Clayton murder shakes city

I set up a thread for the case MS - Dominique Lashelle Clayton, 32, Oxford, Murdered, Suspect Arrested

Looks like Oxford PD has its hands full at the moment.
MOO

 

[afitzy]

I don't believe for a minute that Brandon was kicked out of FW Country Day for academic reasons alone.

If that was the case there are a number of other private schools he could have attended while remaining at home in Ft. Worth.

Whatever his behavior it was egregious enough that neither set of parents wanted him in their homes.

About the fraternities, they have all sorts of interventions for brothers who aren't making the grade...tutors, study sessions, etc.
If he was a good, socially acceptable guy, they would have found a way to keep him.

Don't disagree with you at all on you assessment of the suspect and his sudden HS transfer after 10th grade!

It looks like the family wanted BT out of Dallas and far away for whatever reason so chose a boarding school in Texas Hill Country.

Found the following academic info in the Ole Miss 2019 Recruitment Guide:

Grade Requirement for Ole Miss Fraternity Membership:

As agreed upon by all IFC fraternities through the IFC bylaws, potential new
members must have a 2.70 / 4.00 cumulative GPA to participate in Formal
Recruitment, receive a membership invitation at any time during the year, or be
initiated into a fraternity. There is no exception to this requirement. [BBM]

Academic Transcripts

Students should submit their final high school or college transcripts after graduation or course completion to the University of Mississippi. PNMs who complete 12 ormore college credits after their high school graduation are considered a college student; therefore, their overall college GPA is used in Formal Recruitment. The grades used for Formal Recruitment are verified by the transcripts on file with the University of Mississippi.

Academic transcripts must reflect a cumulative GPA on a 4.00 scale. Please make
sure the cumulative GPA on a 4.00 scale is listed on the transcript before it is mailed
to the university.

 

[borndem]

Don't disagree with you at all on you assessment of the suspect and his sudden HS transfer after 10th grade!

It looks like the family wanted BT out of Dallas and far away for whatever reason so chose a boarding school in Texas Hill Country.

Found the following academic info in the Ole Miss 2019 Recruitment Guide:

Grade Requirement for Ole Miss Fraternity Membership:

As agreed upon by all IFC fraternities through the IFC bylaws, potential new
members must have a 2.70 / 4.00 cumulative GPA to participate in Formal
Recruitment, receive a membership invitation at any time during the year, or be
initiated into a fraternity. There is no exception to this requirement. [BBM]

Academic Transcripts

Students should submit their final high school or college transcripts after graduation or course completion to the University of Mississippi. PNMs who complete 12 ormore college credits after their high school graduation are considered a college student; therefore, their overall college GPA is used in Formal Recruitment. The grades used for Formal Recruitment are verified by the transcripts on file with the University of Mississippi.

Academic transcripts must reflect a cumulative GPA on a 4.00 scale. Please make
sure the cumulative GPA on a 4.00 scale is listed on the transcript before it is mailed
to the university.

Yes to your BBM -- A 2.70 (essentially a C or maybe a C+) is really not that tuff a requirement for most students who attend most of the classes, who get to class on time, who participate in class discussions, who stay awake in class, who come to class at least somewhat prepared, and who study and make C's and B's on tests or other work during the semester.
This guy wasn't majoring in chemical or aerospace engineering or in nuclear physics -- and he was certainly able to walk or drive to class.
It's not that tough, as we all know.
It sounds as though he was a bit behind in graduating in 4 years <choke>, so something had to be keeping him from staying current with where he should be in a 4-year plan (5-year plan?). Obviously, he wasn't screaming to get outta there.
I'm betting he just didn't have the grades to rush a frat. What a shame.
Apparently he was in no hurry to graduate, and I guess his folks were okay with that. SMH.

 

[Quill]

Don't disagree with you at all on you assessment of the suspect and his sudden HS transfer after 10th grade!

It looks like the family wanted BT out of Dallas and far away for whatever reason so chose a boarding school in Texas Hill Country.

Found the following academic info in the Ole Miss 2019 Recruitment Guide:

Grade Requirement for Ole Miss Fraternity Membership:

As agreed upon by all IFC fraternities through the IFC bylaws, potential new
members must have a 2.70 / 4.00 cumulative GPA to participate in Formal
Recruitment, receive a membership invitation at any time during the year, or be
initiated into a fraternity. There is no exception to this requirement. [BBM]

Academic Transcripts

Students should submit their final high school or college transcripts after graduation or course completion to the University of Mississippi. PNMs who complete 12 ormore college credits after their high school graduation are considered a college student; therefore, their overall college GPA is used in Formal Recruitment. The grades used for Formal Recruitment are verified by the transcripts on file with the University of Mississippi.

Academic transcripts must reflect a cumulative GPA on a 4.00 scale. Please make
sure the cumulative GPA on a 4.00 scale is listed on the transcript before it is mailed
to the university.

Yes to your BBM -- A 2.70 (essentially a C or maybe a C+) is really not that tuff a requirement for most students who attend most of the classes, who get to class on time, who participate in class discussions, who stay awake in class, who come to class at least somewhat prepared, and who study and make C's and B's on tests or other work during the semester.
This guy wasn't majoring in chemical or aerospace engineering or in nuclear physics -- and he was certainly able to walk or drive to class.
It's not that tough, as we all know.
It sounds as though he was a bit behind in graduating in 4 years <choke>, so something had to be keeping him from staying current with where he should be in a 4-year plan (5-year plan?). Obviously, he wasn't screaming to get outta there.
I'm betting he just didn't have the grades to rush a frat. What a shame.
Apparently he was in no hurry to graduate, and I guess his folks were okay with that. SMH.

I am shocked at how low that GPA requirement is. I don't know if its the difference girls to boys or location but that is much lower than my experience.

 

[afitzy]

I am shocked at how low that GPA requirement is. I don't know if its the difference girls to boys or location but that is much lower than my experience.

I was curious about your question too and so here is the info for women for 2019 from Panhel website:

Grade Requirements
As required by the National Panhellenic Conference, there is not a GPA requirement to participate in Formal Recruitment at the University of Mississippi.

The typical average to extend a sorority membership invitation is a 3.00 cumulative GPA. Women who have below a 3.00 GPA are advised they are at a greater risk to be released from the Formal Recruitment process due to their academics.[BBM]

For Formal Recruitment 2018, high school students who joined a sorority had an average cumulative GPA of 3.68, while college students had an average cumulative GPA of 3.26.[BBM]

To help students understand how their GPA may affect their Formal Recruitment experience, Panhellenic Council created grade zones to show how academics may factor in Formal Recruitment. Please note, grades are only one of many factors that chapters will consider in membership selection.

GPA Zones

• Green Zone = Your options are not likely limited based on your GPA. (3.0 + )
• Yellow Zone = Your options are more likely to be limited by your GPA. (2.8 – 2.99)
• Red Zone = Your options are very likely to be limited based on GPA. (2.79 and below)

Based on this Zone map, BT would have been identified most likely as a Red Zone PNM had he been female going through recruitment at Ole Miss! MOO

 

[Quill]

I was curious about your question too and so here is the info for women for 2019 from Panhel website:

Grade Requirements
As required by the National Panhellenic Conference, there is not a GPA requirement to participate in Formal Recruitment at the University of Mississippi.

The typical average to extend a sorority membership invitation is a 3.00 cumulative GPA. Women who have below a 3.00 GPA are advised they are at a greater risk to be released from the Formal Recruitment process due to their academics.[BBM]

For Formal Recruitment 2018, high school students who joined a sorority had an average cumulative GPA of 3.68, while college students had an average cumulative GPA of 3.26.[BBM]

To help students understand how their GPA may affect their Formal Recruitment experience, Panhellenic Council created grade zones to show how academics may factor in Formal Recruitment. Please note, grades are only one of many factors that chapters will consider in membership selection.

GPA Zones

• Green Zone = Your options are not likely limited based on your GPA. (3.0 + )
• Yellow Zone = Your options are more likely to be limited by your GPA. (2.8 – 2.99)
• Red Zone = Your options are very likely to be limited based on GPA. (2.79 and below)

Based on this Zone map, BT would have been identified most likely as a Red Zone PNM had he been female going through recruitment at Ole Miss! MOO

Yes, that looks closer to what I have had experience with, which I should point out was not at OM. You are correct; he would have been a red zone and would have not been likely to have gotten a bid in any house. I will say that they usually have national standards going forward and will issue academic probation's for GPA requirements not met. Most are higher than what the university's standards are.

 

[borndem]

I don't believe for a minute that Brandon was kicked out of FW Country Day for academic reasons alone.

If that was the case there are a number of other private schools he could have attended while remaining at home in Ft. Worth.

Whatever his behavior it was egregious enough that neither set of parents wanted him in their homes.

About the fraternities, they have all sorts of interventions for brothers who aren't making the grade...tutors, study sessions, etc.
If he was a good, socially acceptable guy, they would have found a way to keep him.

ITA -- Kids with study problems, test phobia, bad study habits, not attending class, acting out, etc., are some of the reasons why parents enroll their children in private schools. Of course, a big number of kids in boarding school are "regular" kids whose parents find a school that is suitable for a child's talent, college prep, you name it.
If Brandon had bad grades, bad or non-existent study habits, cutting class, etc., I'm sure the school had experts for that -- assisted study halls, testing for reading or other comprehensive problems, being bullied, sleep problems, etc. That's why some parents enroll their kids -- for the special attention s/he will receive if necessary.
He was booted for something they couldn't "fix" or for actions that the school could not or would not allow. Private schools do indeed ask parents to remove their children for doing forbidden things, and those things, I feel sure, are outlined before the child is enrolled, and the staff most likely warned the parents more than once.
He's just one bad egg in an adult costume.

 

[kbpirate]

(edited for brevity above+BBM)
"IF" Ally was pregnant and I don't know if I believe she was or not...

This may have been an inarticulate depiction of Ally's state of of mind by an acquaintance...

The mental gymnastics required for a 21 year old college girl in mental anguish to numb herself "by drinking etc" with some vague notion that maybe it will all go away literally and figuratively without having a conventional abortion isn't hard to believe.
IMO
(edit:grammar)

I agree. If she happened to lose the baby she could mentally write it off as an accident. An abortion is a big deal to most people and something she was probably taught was wrong.

 

[borndem]

Except defense doesn't believe he's guilty.
BT's lawyers said he will plead not guilty.
And that was my question -- what saith the defense?
Self defense?
Real killer running loose?

I don't think his attorneys believe he is guilty or not guilty. It doesn't matter to them, and I'm sure they haven't asked him. Their responsibility is to assure that he gets a fail trial -- that's all. But we know they will do a bit more that than. During the case discussion with him, if they ask him if he did it, and he says "yes," then they can't ask him to testify . To ask him if he killed her -- as if they would, and he is under oath on the witness stand, and he says, "No I did not," the the attys will be guilty of suborning perjury. Suborning perjury is serious -- Here's a little more info:

Subornation of perjury
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
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In American law, Scots law, and under the laws of some English-speaking Commonwealth nations, subornation of perjury is the crime of persuading a person to commit perjury, which is the swearing of a false oath to tell the truth in a legal proceeding, whether spoken or written.

Subornation of perjury - Wikipedia