So, just who is the father of this new child? The uncle by marriage.....and whose marriage?
I wanted to back up a bit and bring up an issue about the children. I have a feeling that many of us on board share similar views concerning child rearing, safety and even housekeeping. However, I have learned (through adoption) that children are quite resilient.
Children have been born in unheated and "squalid" environments since the beginning of time. After all, Jesus was, and he did quite well for 33 years. I'm still shaking my head over how Frank McCourt was able to write the way he did, and win the Pulitzer, after living on tea and soda bread for his entire childhood.
Granted, these children are not in great shape but let's look at each statement separately. They didn't have vaccinations. Many kids don't. Most of my grandchildren don't and never will. One of my son-in-laws doesn't. There are arguments pro and con. The children were behind intellectually. They will probably catch up. And any IQ tests or psych evals done this week are not worth the paper they are written on, IMO, as the children are in shock.
They have some health and vision related issues. No doubt they have not seen a doctor nor an optometrist. It would amaze most Americans to know how many kids never have.
I'd like to put this into perspective without minimizing these particular children's needs. When we adopted twins from Los Angeles County in 1992, they came to us at age four. They had been born at 25 weeks gestation weighing only 1 lb and 1 1/2 lbs. respectively. They had been prenatally exposed to crack cocaine, heroin, PCP, and probably a host of other substances. They were their parents' 7th and 8th children. They were abandoned at the hospital.
Our daughter was never diagnosed with cerebral palsy, autism, ID, severe vision impairment or deafness. She had no braces for her legs and no hearing aids nor glasses. She didn't even have a pair of shoes that fit. Our son had never been diagnosed as seriously mentally ill nor had he received treatment or medication for that disability. They had had no documented vaccinations but had lived in six foster homes--and high priced specialized ones at that. They were clients of the California Regional Center.
Most everyone here knows that our family became foster parents for the first time two years ago, after our 13 children were grown. It is a noble calling. I have the greatest respect for most foster parents.
My point is that even with high end foster care payments, social workers, teachers, and case managers, our children still were sorely lacking in basic care--in Los Angeles, CA. In our current economy, many children are going without. Any child mired in poverty is likely behind intellectually and suffers from some health and vision deficits. It is truly tragic but it is a fact.
I am not happy about the condition these children lived in but my biggest concern is their isolation. That can hamper their development more than anything. Unless (and this is a very big UNLESS) their mother was there for them and loved them. If she loved them and if they are bonded to one another, there is no limit to how they can blossom and grow. Consider the two men I mentioned above.
Time will tell. The story is not yet fully revealed. JMO
