With Ray being 60 and about to retire, any insight on why he would plan a disappearance instead of just telling people the truth? Why not just come clean that you want to move out of PA and don't see a future with Patty? I tend to think he left on his own accord because he was intimidated by someone (s). He needed his destination to be confidential and his disappearance to be a complete mystery. He wanted people to ponder the possibility of foul play or suicide..this would benefit him. There's probably one person he trusted with this..I'm sure he needed a new identity, passport, funds, transportation, ect. and would need help pulling this off.
It's a lot of work, not an undertaking someone would take on a whim or an excuse to break up with a girlfriend. JMO, doing the disappearing act (which is extremely difficult to do, even 20 yrs ago) is probably the least likely scenario. Maybe a threat to his or his family's life, or risk of imprisonment for some crime. He had no personal financial obligations to escape from.