School Parents Want 1st Grader W/ Peanut Allergy Sent Home/Home-Schooled

[JBean]

I know everyone has really strong feelings on this topic, but we have to avoid getting personal with other members. Please refer to the parents in the story and not other members in an attacking way.
Thanks everyone.

 

[Trident]

Natural selection?
Are you suggesting this girl be kicked out of the gene pool so the other kids don't have to swim with her? help me here.

Yep, natural selection kept us, as human being alive with two arms, two legs, heads, etc. I am saying, back in the good ole days, before we figured out how to keep everyone alive, no matter what, this child may not have lived; therefore, this would never have emerged as a problem.

Swimming in the gene pool brings a lot of unpleasant images to mind, such as being born minus limbs, noses, faces, hearts, etc. Do you think everyone should survive, reproduce, and change the gene pool?

My own opinion, and really curious.

Actually, now I am really OT, and maybe we should have a separate thread?

 

[JBean]

I am saying, back in the good ole days, before we figured out how to keep everyone alive, no matter what, this child may not have lived; therefore, this would never have emerged as a problem.

Swimming in the gene pool brings a lot of unpleasant images to mind, such as being born minus limbs, noses, faces, hearts, etc. Do you think everyone should survive, reproduce, and change the gene pool?

My own opinion, and really curious.

But it is not the good old days Trident. We'd all be dead by 35 if that were the case. We have the ability to save lives and I am thankful for it

These kids have to wash to save this girl. Why the uproar? Washing is good.

As for the gene pool, my only question is are you suggesting this girl die off so that we don't have this problem? If you are THAT is a problem and I am suggesting you do not mention it again. I do need clarification as to whether or not this is what you were suggesting.

 

[Steely Dan]

Yep, natural selection kept us, as human being alive with two arms, two legs, heads, etc. I am saying, back in the good ole days, before we figured out how to keep everyone alive, no matter what, this child may not have lived; therefore, this would never have emerged as a problem.

Swimming in the gene pool brings a lot of unpleasant images to mind, such as being born minus limbs, noses, faces, hearts, etc. Do you think everyone should survive, reproduce, and change the gene pool?

My own opinion, and really curious.

Actually, now I am really OT, and maybe we should have a separate thread?

I'm just curious, where do you draw the line? Are you suggesting that those who aren't completely healthy at birth be killed?

Have you ever gone to the doctor? If so why?

 

[SugarQueen]

I have a child with sensory issues. While sensory wise he has improved he has developed severe food aversions. Not allergies, just fear of eating most foods. It is not an easy life for him.

He had 2 children in his class with severe (?) nut allergies. The same 2 kids 2 years in a row. The difference in how the parents handle it is amazing. Parent one told me my son didn't need to stop bringing PB for lunch, just asked that he not sit next to her DD and wash his hands. Parent one sent in special snacks for her DD for parties and such. Her DD was also very good at checking labels and not eating things she wasn't sure of. Parent one felt her DD would have to live with this and would need to learn to deal. When the school set aside nut free lunch tables parent one had her DD eat there.
Parent 2 wanted no snack time in class and no parties. She also wanted no PB at lunch. Parent 2 had a fit that the school set aside nut free lunch tables. She refused to allow her son to sit there. She said that was discrimination. She did not want her son separated. She did however fight for a nut free bus for class trips. The difference in the children is amazing. Child one (a girl) is outgoing, well liked by the other kids, involved in sports and scouts. Child 2 (a boy) is a skittish child. He seems so uncomfortable in his own skin. The other kids don't interact with him much. He is not allowed to attend or have friend birthday parties. He is not allowed to receive valentine cards or other holiday cards from the kids. He is basically an outcast. I know both mom's, one better than the other. Mom 2 can't seem to have a conversation without mentioning what her son CAN"T do or have. His allergy comes up in every conversation. Mom one treats her child like a normal child while making careful choices. Both mom's have told me their kids allergies are "about equal". The difference is amazing!!

I have no problem making changes for the children. I really just find the difference in how the parents handle it and the differnce in the children fascinating.

 

[Shear22]

Yep, natural selection kept us, as human being alive with two arms, two legs, heads, etc. I am saying, back in the good ole days, before we figured out how to keep everyone alive, no matter what, this child may not have lived; therefore, this would never have emerged as a problem.

Swimming in the gene pool brings a lot of unpleasant images to mind, such as being born minus limbs, noses, faces, hearts, etc. Do you think everyone should survive, reproduce, and change the gene pool?

My own opinion, and really curious.

Actually, now I am really OT, and maybe we should have a separate thread?

So, not only should this little girl not be able to go to public school, she shouldn't be allowed to reproduce? If we really follow the natural selection argument then she should be allowed to go to school and all the other kids should be able to eat their peanut butter sandwiches right next her, and nature will take care of things. That's how it was done in the 'good ole days' and that's why I think the good ole days were not so great.

Btw, and OT, as far as I know we haven't figured out how to keep everyone alive no matter what. An old friend of mine just lost his 37 year old wife in childbirth and it happened at a great hospital with nobody at fault. Nature does take its course, but if there are steps that we can take to save the lives of others I think that we should.

Back on topic, I think washing and rinsing is not inappropriate for schoolchildren to do, and I think that holding a protest outside of the school is absolutely the wrong way to address the issue.

 

[Steely Dan]

I have a child with sensory issues. While sensory wise he has improved he has developed severe food aversions. Not allergies, just fear of eating most foods. It is not an easy life for him.

He had 2 children in his class with severe (?) nut allergies. The same 2 kids 2 years in a row. The difference in how the parents handle it is amazing. Parent one told me my son didn't need to stop bringing PB for lunch, just asked that he not sit next to her DD and wash his hands. Parent one sent in special snacks for her DD for parties and such. Her DD was also very good at checking labels and not eating things she wasn't sure of. Parent one felt her DD would have to live with this and would need to learn to deal. When the school set aside nut free lunch tables parent one had her DD eat there.
Parent 2 wanted no snack time in class and no parties. She also wanted no PB at lunch. Parent 2 had a fit that the school set aside nut free lunch tables. She refused to allow her son to sit there. She said that was discrimination. She did not want her son separated. She did however fight for a nut free bus for class trips. The difference in the children is amazing. Child one (a girl) is outgoing, well liked by the other kids, involved in sports and scouts. Child 2 (a boy) is a skittish child. He seems so uncomfortable in his own skin. The other kids don't interact with him much. He is not allowed to attend or have friend birthday parties. He is not allowed to receive valentine cards or other holiday cards from the kids. He is basically an outcast. I know both mom's, one better than the other. Mom 2 can't seem to have a conversation without mentioning what her son CAN"T do or have. His allergy comes up in every conversation. Mom one treats her child like a normal child while making careful choices. Both mom's have told me their kids allergies are "about equal". The difference is amazing!!

I have no problem making changes for the children. I really just find the difference in how the parents handle it and the differnce in the children fascinating.

That is fascinating. Where's the line at overprotective?

 

[WhyaDuck?]

So, not only should this little girl not be able to go to public school, she shouldn't be allowed to reproduce? If we really follow the natural selection argument then she should be allowed to go to school and all the other kids should be able to eat their peanut butter sandwiches right next her, and nature will take care of things. That's how it was done in the 'good ole days' and that's why I think the good ole days were not so great.

Btw, and OT, as far as I know we haven't figured out how to keep everyone alive no matter what. An old friend of mine just lost his 37 year old wife in childbirth and it happened at a great hospital with nobody at fault. Nature does take its course, but if there are steps that we can take to save the lives of others I think that we should.

Back on topic, I think washing and rinsing is not inappropriate for schoolchildren to do, and I think that holding a protest outside of the school is absolutely the wrong way to address the issue.

BBM

Agreed, 100%. It should not have been handled where the child in question would be so publicly singled out, and I dislike that the other kids likely now see her as some sort of "problem" that angers their parents.

(ETA: I also agree that the good old days were not all that great, but I'm saying that part quietly.)

 

[JBean]

Let's move past the natural selection issue, it is beyond offensive regarding a 6yo with a penaut allergy and public school. It has no place in this thread or in this topic.
I am sure that is not what TRident meant.
Let's drop it here.

 

[SugarQueen]

That is fascinating. Where's the line at overprotective?

Both children also take the school bus back and forth most days. Child 1 has a packet of wipes and will wipe her hands after she sits down. She does her best to keep her hands off the seats and such. She sits with the same friend everyday. Child 2... bus driver has to wash down the front seat before picking up his grade. Child 2 sits in the front seat ONLY wears gloves for the ride and is NOT allowed to sit next to anyone.

Both parents want what is best but handle it differently, it shows in the children.

Just as an aside... my DS10 has an allergy to adhesives!! It isn't a common allergy. So far we still can't pin down exactly what adhesives will bother him and to what extent. We do know medical adhesives touching his body are a huge problem. He has since had reactions to several glues. At this point it is all hit or miss. I have not asked the school for any changes other than having him wash his hands after art or class projects. I did also ask the art teacher if they use a less common type adhesive for projects to please keep an eye on him and check hands ,wrist, face for hives. We have been told it will get worse with exposure but really how far can we take it?? No glue/tape/bandaids in school??

 

[WhyaDuck?]

Both children also take the school bus back and forth most days. Child 1 has a packet of wipes and will wipe her hands after she sits down. She does her best to keep her hands off the seats and such. She sits with the same friend everyday. Child 2... bus driver has to wash down the front seat before picking up his grade. Child 2 sits in the front seat ONLY wears gloves for the ride and is NOT allowed to sit next to anyone.

Both parents want what is best but handle it shows in the children.

Just as an aside... my DS10 has an allergy to adhesives!! It isn't a common allergy. So far we still can't pin down exactly what adhesives will bother him and to what extent. We do know medical adhesives touching his body are a huge problem. He has since had reactions to several glues. At this point it is all hit or miss. I have not asked the school for any changes other than having him wash his hands after art or class projects. I did also ask the art teacher if they use a less common type adhesive for projects to please keep an eye on him and check hands ,wrist, face for hives. We have been told it will get worse with exposure but really how far can we take it?? Now glue/tape/bandaids in school??

Do you know if there is a difference in the severity of their allergies or in their history of reactions? I think it's great that they have trained the little girl to be so aware of what she needs to do.

But this process of wiping things down and not touching everything under the sun, etc - that's what I mean by homeschooling until the child is old enough to self-monitor. My son is only 3yo, but I have a hard time imagining him being contained enough by 5yo to be safe - but I admit that I may really be overprotective, so there's that.

Just a side note to clarify, I wasn't saying the parents should be *forced* to homeschool, just saying I would consider it seriously if it was an extreme allergy, at least until my child could be as aware and safe as that child in your description sounds.

 

[JBean]

Do you know if there is a difference in the severity of their allergies or in their history of reactions? I think it's great that they have trained the little girl to be so aware of what she needs to do.

But this process of wiping things down and not touching everything under the sun, etc - that's what I mean by homeschooling until the child is old enough to self-monitor. My son is only 3yo, but I have a hard time imagining him being contained enough by 5yo to be safe - but I admit that I may really be overprotective, so there's that.

Just a side note to clarify, I wasn't saying the parents should be *forced* to homeschool, just saying I would consider it seriously if it was an extreme allergy, at least until my child could be as aware and safe as that child in your description sounds.

I wonder if this girl does understand what she needs to do. That would explain why, if her allergy is overly extreme and/or severe, the kids and school are required to do very little.
Maybe she has 90% of it covered and the extra 10% assistance by schoolmates makes it safe for her.

 

[WhyaDuck?]

I wonder if this girl does understand what she needs to do. That would explain why, if her allergy is overly extreme and/or severe, the kids and school are required to do very little.
Maybe she has 90% of it covered and the extra 10% assistance by schoolmates makes it safe for her.

Yes, my opinion would completely depend on the individual situation and context.

I have a kid who will eat dog treats he finds in snowbanks, so I lack perspective on this issue, I think. :blushing:

ETA: Okay, so eating might be overstating - but tasting is very likely. Playing with? Certainly. :sigh:

 

[SugarQueen]

Do you know if there is a difference in the severity of their allergies or in their history of reactions? I think it's great that they have trained the little girl to be so aware of what she needs to do.

But this process of wiping things down and not touching everything under the sun, etc - that's what I mean by homeschooling until the child is old enough to self-monitor. My son is only 3yo, but I have a hard time imagining him being contained enough by 5yo to be safe - but I admit that I may really be overprotective, so there's that.

Just a side note to clarify, I wasn't saying the parents should be *forced* to homeschool, just saying I would consider it seriously if it was an extreme allergy, at least until my child could be as aware and safe as that child in your description sounds.

The 2 mom's know each other and do chat on the days they pick the kids up from school. In conversation with both they have said the allergies/reactions are about equal. Mom 1 just feels HER child has the issue so HER child has to be able to handle it. Her DD also has a long list of other allergies and asthma. She also has a life threatening allergy to bee stings. Mom and child do not have a simple, uncomplicated life. Mom just tries to keep it as normal as possible and her DD is used to being careful. The DD is also very aware of the times she needs medical help be it epi-pen or inhaler.

 

[angeldust]

The kindness of my heart has feed the hungry, clothed the naked, and given shelter to many without a roof. However, I don't feel it kindness of anyone's heart to bend over backward for a family who maybe should take responsibility for the life of their own child. God helps those who help themselves.

My opinion only

So why does nt that kindness in your heart spread to children with no control over their illness.

 

[eileenhawkeye]

Does the school check the kids' backpacks everyday when they come into school? What if one of the first graders sneaks a Reese's Cup in their bag after Halloween, thinking it is chocolate instead of the same peanut butter that Mom puts on his or her sandwiches?

 

[angeldust]

Hi Angela,

I hear ya - it's a very difficult situation. I didn't even think about kissing - egads! My son is 13 and is coming upon those romantic years! There's no doubt that parents can somewhat control what their children eat in the early years, with no worries of children stuffing their pockets, or stopping at a shop. Once they get a bit older (teen years) is when I would start to worry more for the allergic child. So many unknows that adults will find difficult to control.

I absolutely understand the consideration for any allergy. It scares me, however, when the allergy is so deadly. I need to educate myself more on this, as I thought it was similar to a bee sting, and if you had an epi-pen you might be okay. That doesn't seem to be the case. Is there anything out there medical wise that can treat this allergy in case of an emergency?

Thanks for your POV - it's much appreciated (for a naive person like me).

Hugs,

Mel

Hi Mel:seeya:

I didnt even think about the kissing thing, you have no idea, although like yourself im thinking the older and more independent they get the harder it will become. Im certainly not looking forward to it and as she s 10 Im hopeing this wont be a problem until later lol.

Thats the thing with this allergy there is no knowing just how severe it is and where the child might be tolerant to something one day the next is a problem. Its all new to us too so were taking it one day at a time. It may be that my daughter will be fine as long as she avoids nuts ie as in eating them I dont know we will just have to take it as comes,as they cant be tested for their tolerance.

Yes the wee one has her epipen,piriton and her inhalers and knowsif at any time the epipen is used she has to call 999.

The sad state of affairs is it can happen to anyone at any time. My Friend sister is a nurse and her husband a doctor one night after coming home from his shift he had a bottle of beer and a pack of nuts about a half hour later he said he needed to lie down didnt feel to good not thinking for a moment about the nuts. His breathing became laboured and he said to my friend call an ambulance i think im going into shock .. he was she was in a panic anyway long story short he was ok but now cannot eat nuts and has to carry a pen he s 50. btw my friend sister can be a little intolerant of patients families fussing, however when she was the one on the receiveing end she reacted just like all the others, she is quick to brush off. Her attitude has changed a little now,

So Its not just kids it happens to, its just as adults were more able to control our own environment.



for the fact that you actually care enough and have taken the time to respond to this thread the way you have shows what a considerate person you are.


Thank you x angela

I actually came to this thread thinking I may get a little support or information that may be helpful to me.

 

[Steely Dan]

Both children also take the school bus back and forth most days. Child 1 has a packet of wipes and will wipe her hands after she sits down. She does her best to keep her hands off the seats and such. She sits with the same friend everyday. Child 2... bus driver has to wash down the front seat before picking up his grade. Child 2 sits in the front seat ONLY wears gloves for the ride and is NOT allowed to sit next to anyone.

Both parents want what is best but handle it differently, it shows in the children.

Just as an aside... my DS10 has an allergy to adhesives!! It isn't a common allergy. So far we still can't pin down exactly what adhesives will bother him and to what extent. We do know medical adhesives touching his body are a huge problem. He has since had reactions to several glues. At this point it is all hit or miss. I have not asked the school for any changes other than having him wash his hands after art or class projects. I did also ask the art teacher if they use a less common type adhesive for projects to please keep an eye on him and check hands ,wrist, face for hives. We have been told it will get worse with exposure but really how far can we take it?? No glue/tape/bandaids in school??

My suggestion is to keep track of the names of the different glues or the products that have the glue on them. Once you get a list of about ten you can start researching them against the ones that don't cause hives and find if there is an ingredient present in glues that give him troubles. JMO

 

[SugarQueen]

Thanks Steely. That's pretty much what we have been doing. It's been hit or miss. DS was supposed to wear a heart monitor for 10 days. Day 4 when I picked him up from school he had hives. I had never dealt with hives before and thought it was a viral type rash. Within 2 hours he had a full systemic reaction including swollen lips with dark blotches. That is when we discovered the allergy.

 

[Steely Dan]

Thanks Steely. That's pretty much what we have been doing. It's been hit or miss. DS was supposed to wear a heart monitor for 10 days. Day 4 when I picked him up from school he had hives. I had never dealt with hives before and thought it was a viral type rash. Within 2 hours he had a full systemic reaction including swollen lips with dark blotches. That is when we discovered the allergy.

http://www.tandurust.com/skin-care/adhesive-tape-allergy.html

Home Remedies for Allergic Reactions of Adhesive Tape or Glue

Allergy in general is the immune system’s hypersensitivity to contact with certain surfaces or materials such as adhesive tapes or glue resulting to allergic rashes, itching, and skin redness. Allergy is a mysterious body reaction, and one of its most notable characteristic is the difficulty to point out which specific chemical component caused the allergic reaction.

The source of allergy can only be determined through laboratory tests. Generally, there is no cure for allergies such as glue allergy. The only thing you can do is manage the symptoms and look at the possible source of the allergic reaction and start managing the condition from there....



I found this, if you don't know some of this stuff I hope it helps.

This is a health board where people talk about adhesive allergies; Adhesive Allergy - Skin Problems Message Board - HealthBoards