I totally understand, but I can see how a "rehoming" clearinghouses are formed.
I mentioned upthread that someone I know adopted a child from overseas who turned out to be VERY disturbed emotionally - in all likelihood from severe neglect while an infant and toddler in an orphanage. The American family who adopted him were actually afraid for their safely and for the safety of their bio children. I cannot overstate enough that situation was horrific and the family, as loving and strong as they are, could not handle it.
But, once he was adopted, he was their legal child. You can't give a child back, even if he was literally tearing the family apart physically and emotionally. You can't go back to the courts and "undo" the adoption. Churches, community groups, hospitals. social services offered no help for the family I know - there is no system to handle adoptions that don't work out....and there is no system that fully informs families of this in advance. It's a shock that each family has to endure and negotiate on their own.
The people I know eventually were able to "rehome" him, legally and through proper channels, to a couple who knew what they were committing to and had the time and experience to handle an extremely violent child. But what if they didn't find that couple who would take their adopted child? What could they do??
Adopting a child is such a generous thing to do - and families lovingly and eagerly go into it ready to accept whoever they get, sick or healthy....but some children from overseas might require care that a regular family simply cannot provide, especially if they are completely unaware of what harm to their development neglected children may have suffered.
Again, these cases are not just a spirited child or a depressed child or malnurished child....but severely emotionally damaged to the point of being dangerous for people untrained to handle it.
I know I'm going off on a tangent as there is no evidence (that we know of) that little Sherin suffered these severe problems, but I do want to jump in and present another side to the "rehoming" scenario. These are not just people who decided on a whim to get rid of a child they don't like....they are desperate and there is really no support net for them other than to figure it out on their own.
It's a problem that needs to be fixed.
jmo
