I'm just going to have to weigh in one more time, as one of those "self-righteous" parents who did not ever leave my children alone.
My kids are now 27, 23 and 17. We have lived in a suburban community outside San Diego since they were born and we have no family in town to act as babysitters. My husband was (he's recently retired) an executive for a large company so we had to attend a lot of company schmoozing events here in town and we traveled a good deal - both on family vacations all over the world, and as tag-alongs on business trips.
It wasn't always easy to find childcare. During the course of my children's childhoods, I used mom-to-mom babysitting coops, teenage sitters, and, on occasion professional companies hiring bonded sitters. If we couldn't find a suitable sitter, one or both of us stayed home. That simple.
I do fault the McCanns for leaving their child alone. My personal theory is that she died in the apartment, possibly from doing some kind of activity while under the influence of sedatives that were supposed to have knocked her out. But, whether she was kidnapped or died as a result of an accident, the McCanns are responsible for leaving her in a position for harm to come to her.
We have a pool in our backyard. For that reason alone, I would never have left my children alone, even to go across the street, and even with every door in the house locked and the pool alarms operating on the doors and outside at the pool site. The McCanns however, felt free to leave their three babies unattended, with the doors supposedly unlocked and an enticing pool just steps away. That alone constitutes criminal negligence in the state of California.
As the initial post on this thread points out - mothers with less political and economic clout do get brought up for prosecution when they leave their children unattended. Lucky for the well-connected McCanns that they were able to place calls to just the right people to suppress being hauled to jail for leaving their three children alone.
I find everyone on this board to be good and sincere people but how anyone can defend the McCanns' leaving three babies alone is beyond my ability to comprehend. These weren't school-age children. They were toddlers with absolutely no ability to discern safe behavior.
Jayelles, you can label me "self-righteous" but those are my honest opinions. I've lived motherhood for 27 years and I believe my opinions are valid by virtue of experience on the "field" and by virtue of comparison with the many other mothers I have known over the years who also did not leave their toddlers alone.
(This post doesn't even take into account the particular callousness it would take for a parent to disregard completely that their child cried for them in night's previous and clearly did not want to be left alone in a strange country and a strange bedroom. That part of this story makes me cry every time I think of Madeline being left by herself when she was so clearly scared/lonely/upset....whatever.)
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