2010.06.19 ~ Kyron Horman's Blended Family

[Kentjbkent]

But, that is just assuming that because the biomom 'got better', that she would just have to go to court, and they'd just hand all custody over to her. It does NOT work like that in the courts. Mothers do not automatically get custody just because they feel better or want it. No, the court will not remove a child from the home of ONE of the biological parents where they appear to be doing well just because the other one wants full custody. More likely that they would assign 50/50 legal custody with a physical custody that allows the child to stay in the home/school they are used to. If you live in town with that child, you may be able to pull off a full 50/50 time share, but if you live out of state, your time share is not going to be 50/50, and it really means NOTHING about you as a parent.

EXACTLY! Which is the point I was trying to make that it was unfair and uncalled for to assume biomom CHOSE to be a noncustodial parent all these years...

 

[AbbieNormal]

BBM -

Brings up a real quick question - Did we learn for a fact that Desiree & Tony were in Medford the morning Kyron went missing? I've assumed that may be true, but I've not seen this confirmed - maybe this was covered in an article this w/e or anything? Or maybe you were just assuming that's where they were?

On the same vein - did we ever learn for a fact that Kaine was at work?

TIA

I don't know for a fact where Kaine was, but I did read that he worked from home on Fridays.

 

[AbbieNormal]

EXACTLY! Which is the point I was trying to make that it was unfair and uncalled for to assume biomom CHOSE to be a noncustodial parent all these years...

Also, can't ASSUME that the courts were even involved i Kyrons case, it could have just been a verbal agreement between the parents. Perhaps if she had asked to have Kyron come to live with her, it would have happened. Perhaps she thought Kyrons roots were with Terri and Kaine and that she didn't want to uproot his life, take him from his familiar school and friends.

 

[Donjeta]

Desiree never tried to regain custody of Kyron, though she has maintained a close relationship with her son, caring for him every weekend or so with her new husband, Medford police Detective Tony Young.

This sounds like she did not take the custody issue to court.

 

[Nellie]

I wonder why all the quotes in the article are people who are connected to Terri and Kaine Horman's side of the family. No friends and relatives of Desiree and Tony are quoted although they're an important part of Kyron's blended family as well.

I've wondered if any locals have heard any rumors about this? I've heard one and I just wonder if anyone else has... Until it all comes out, that is all I consider it.

Just wondering...:waitasec:

 

[Aedrys]

Seems like this thread got pretty heated for a bit there. I think we need to take a breath and step back. I have my suspicions about Terri myself, but without much information and only that rosy article about the family, I don't think it's possible to know motivations and who started what with who and who moved in with who for what reason just yet. Wow. Seems like the claws are coming out today. Maybe it's because it's Monday...

I think we need to wait for more information before villainizing Terri. I was almost doing that myself in the beginning, but for the sake of this missing boy and not having enough information to form a good opinion of what's going on here, I've decided to step back and not be so judgmental. The fact is, we don't know how these parents got together or if there was underlying motives or whatnot. The fact is that they loved this child, all of them, and now this child is missing. The last thing we need to do is to keep ripping the family apart. It won't help find Kyron, and just think if it was you and your family. Would you want your family history discussed like this?

 

[Donjeta]

There used to be a thread on the letter but I see it's been pulled.

 

[Aedrys]

Yeah, it got heated on that thread too. Desiree was being torn apart in there and it wasn't pretty. So I don't blame the mods for pulling it. I'm glad someone posted the letter here because it's a really heartfelt letter. Kyron's "momma" Desiree really misses him. I always thought she was genuine.

 

[Wendy101]

There used to be a thread on the letter but I see it's been pulled.

Yes, sorry, that was me. I posted it in a different thread.. because I wanted to discuss it...

It is here now: Kyron's family statements, appearances news conferences


anyway, here is the link for the letter .. sorry about that

http://www.kgw.com/news/local/Kyrons-mom-reaches-out-with-emotional-letter-96794804.html

 

[Donjeta]

Seems like this thread got pretty heated for a bit there. I think we need to take a breath and step back. I have my suspicions about Terri myself, but without much information and only that rosy article about the family, I don't think it's possible to know motivations and who started what with who and who moved in with who for what reason just yet. Wow. Seems like the claws are coming out today. Maybe it's because it's Monday...

I think we need to wait for more information before villainizing Terri. I was almost doing that myself in the beginning, but for the sake of this missing boy and not having enough information to form a good opinion of what's going on here, I've decided to step back and not be so judgmental. The fact is, we don't know how these parents got together or if there was underlying motives or whatnot. The fact is that they loved this child, all of them, and now this child is missing. The last thing we need to do is to keep ripping the family apart. It won't help find Kyron, and just think if it was you and your family. Would you want your family history discussed like this?

It's just a matter of perspective I think. From my point of view, if someone says that they believe Terri and Kaine were already together when Kyron was born because the other story sounds rather silly and this version makes more sense, I don't see it as ripping anybody apart. It's simply an opinion about which one of conflicting stories is more believable.

People start new relationships while they're still married to somebody else and while it may be very sad and stressful it doesn't mean that anybody has to be a villain in my world. Sometimes it could be a good decision for everyone to rearrange the relationships so that everyone can find someone they can be happy with.

I believe Carol Moulton's version over the story about a babysitter leaving her job and moving in with her child to care for his toddler in purely platonic manner because I see romantic partners doing it for each other regularly but the other case is much less likely. But it doesn't mean they shouldn't have moved together or shouldn't have had a relationship. It's their choice. We don't know how it worked for them and I guess it's none of our business, unless they choose to tell us but IMO if they choose tell us an unlikely story that doesn't fit with what we've been told previously we're allowed to have an opinion about it.

 

[gwenabob]

I have had a lot of single guy friends that I've been very very close to, though not intimate with, and I really can't even imagine myself giving up a career to go live with a man and take care of his infant son if the relationship was platonic at the beginning. I'm sure that Beaverton has daycares... I would guess that Intel may even have a daycare on the Jones Farm Campus... regardless, daycare or a daytime sitter at home would make sense. That's what most working single parents do. Moving a friend of your wife's into the house when the baby is 3 days old (I suspect earlier, actually) does not make sense.

A teacher leaving a full-time teaching job to move into the house to raise another woman's baby does not make sense. Leaving insurance and benefits to be a babysitter? Doesn't make sense. Giving up a new career to raise a baby for a friend? Nope... just doesn't make sense. Lugging your eight year old son along into this new home where you're going to raise someone else's baby? Are you kidding me? WHO does this kind of stuff?

My conclusion is that the relationship with Terri and Kaine wasn't as innocent at the beginning as the article's informant opined.

I think the writer of the article was duped with a Capital D.

 

[joshiesmom]

BBM -

Brings up a real quick question - Did we learn for a fact that Desiree & Tony were in Medford the morning Kyron went missing? I've assumed that may be true, but I've not seen this confirmed - maybe this was covered in an article this w/e or anything? Or maybe you were just assuming that's where they were?

On the same vein - did we ever learn for a fact that Kaine was at work?

TIA

Yes, Desiree & Tony were at home in Medford. They left for Portland very quickly after getting a phone call saying Kyron was missing.
http://localnewscomesfirst.com/index.php?option=com_seyret&task=videodirectlink&Itemid=431&id=5169

 

[human]

I think that it's hard to get along all of the time with just one other person.

So I can't believe that there aren't issues with all of these people and their needs and wants .

 

[Aedrys]

It's just a matter of perspective I think. From my point of view, if someone says that they believe Terri and Kaine were already together when Kyron was born because the other story sounds rather silly and this version makes more sense, I don't see it as ripping anybody apart. It's simply an opinion about which one of conflicting stories is more believable.

People start new relationships while they're still married to somebody else and while it may be very sad and stressful it doesn't mean that anybody has to be a villain in my world. Sometimes it could be a good decision for everyone to rearrange the relationships so that everyone can find someone they can be happy with.

I believe Carol Moulton's version over the story about a babysitter leaving her job and moving in with her child to care for his toddler in purely platonic manner because I see romantic partners doing it for each other regularly but the other case is much less likely. But it doesn't mean they shouldn't have moved together or shouldn't have had a relationship. It's their choice. We don't know how it worked for them and I guess it's none of our business, unless they choose to tell us but IMO if they choose tell us an unlikely story that doesn't fit with what we've been told previously we're allowed to have an opinion about it.

That's fine to have an opinion. I'm not saying we can't have opinions. But I think it's a huge leap to say she had insidious intentions in getting with Kaine, and that she's some kind of evil stepmother. Yes, the focus is on her. Yes, that makes me feel uneasy. But without any facts to back it up, to make these assumptions about her is just cruel. And as a stepmother myself, it makes me think if anything happened to my stepchild, I would probably be roasted at the bad stepmother who didn't love her by people who would jump to conclusions about me because I'm her stepmother and not her biological mother, who isn't even fit to be a mother in the first place, but that's besides the point. You can't judge a family just on it's blended makeup alone and make inferences about who got together with who and how with so little facts to go on.

Now if some facts come out that prove true what everything is thinking, including me at times, I'll eat my words. But I will not cast this woman under the bus as the evil stepmother bent on destroying the family all for selfish gain when NOTHING like that has come out about her. Yes, some of her actions seem selfish from what we've seen and the LE seem to be focusing on her, but all we have is guesses at this point, not facts. That's what I'm saying.

It reminds me of Mr. Roy Kronk from the Caylee Anthony case. The defense has done everything it it's power to potray him as a duct tape loving pedophile when their only proof is two ex-wives that wouldn't mind talking trash about him. He found the body of Caylee Anthony and he's a hero for that, and the police have completely cleared him, yet the defense would have you believe he found the body because he put it there in the first place. He has no criminal record, and nothing that his ex-wives have said have yet to be proven. In fact, one ex-wife keeps pushing NOT to be deposed, so what does that tell you?

I am not going to make the mistake of jumping to conclusions with TH unless I am given facts to back up all of the rumors going around. And I'm not going to make inferences from the rosy writeup of Kyron's family or the letter Desiree wrote either. We know almost nothing about these people, and I'm tired of seeing good people get thrown under the bus for no good reason. Doesn't mean I'm not suspicious of Terri, but until the LE says she is a POI and there are facts to go along with it, I'm not going to assume she has anything to do with what happened to Kyron.

The important thing is that Kyron is missing and needs to be found. I don't think he would like us talking about his family like this. He needs all four parents whether we like them or not, and hopefully none of them are involved in what happened to him. And if his family is involved, then hopefully the law will catch up with them and make them pay the price. Until then, I am just going to wait for more facts to come out from LE, however long that may be.

All IMO. I hope I am not out of line here. If I am, I'm sorry.

 

[grandmaj]

We are not sleuthing family members.

We can discuss information released by the main stream media regarding TH only at this time.

Do NOT start posting about resumes, schools attended, organizations that the family members belong to, bra size or anything else of that nature.

[ame="http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=106878"]Threadiquette & Forum Rules Updates ~ Ask Your Questions Here - Websleuths Crime Sleuthing Community[/ame]

 

[rosiebean]

I've wondered if any locals have heard any rumors about this? I've heard one and I just wonder if anyone else has... Until it all comes out, that is all I consider it.

Just wondering...:waitasec:

I'm not a local, but did hear an 'opinion' about this subject from one...I used to live on the west coat and still have friends there.

Despite opinions, MOO is that the article about the blended family is slanted...in that it only quotes from SM's friends and family. It could very well be that the fact in the article are true, but until I hear from other sources outside of SM's circle, I'll withhold judgment. So far, I've read different facts about when SM and BioDad were married, when she began taking care of Kyron, etc...so given that the 'blended family' article conflicts with other articles (one quoteing SM's mother)...again, I'll take a 'wait and see' attitude about this.

 

[glorybug]

It appears to be extremely common for people to move in and care for other people's children in a platonic situation. And then days, weeks or even years later for it to take a romantic turn. It's called the babysitter or the nanny. Sad thing is it happens far too often while the parents are still married.

What is uncommon is for your best friend to have an affair with your husband, move in with him and care fr your child, marry him after you're divorced, and then end up being the supposed last person who saw your missing child-----

All while having nerves of steel to not go ballistic on this 'friend' at some point in public.

I find this scenario not believable at all, and think it more likely that the SM's mother just slipped with how many years they'd actually been a 'couple'. My parents would not be able to say correctly exactly how many years I've been with my fiance. A good guess maybe, but not exact.

 

[PorcineGranny]

glory, just for the record I do not know of any person who has given up their profession and moved in with someone of the opposite sex to care for their child. JMO

 

[denkster69]

I just wanna know how the MOM'S are getting along now,,,,,,,,I'm curious to know if Desiree is willing and able to be around Terrie, knowing she is the one being focused on.

 

[eyes4crime]

glory, just for the record I do not know of any person who has given up their profession and moved in with someone of the opposite sex to care for their child. JMO

I know a couple people - didn't give up their profession, but put it on hold. moo