2010.08.02 - DS's friends speak out.

[Emeralgem]

SBM

Can I just say that I find that a (really) snarky post? I am not skinny - wear a size 18, as a matter of fact. I don't eat a lot. I skip meals daily. I don't eat lunch at work most of the time...

To say what you did is, in my opinion, just mean. Yes, she's fat. So am I. I am pretty physically active (hold a blackbelt, have 125 skydives, ride a thoroughbred horse 5x weekly, and am a student nurse on my feet 12 hours a day). In my horse show clothes, I resemble tweedledee to an alarming degree. And I eat 1x a day. My day starts about 4:30 am. Breakfast is usually coffee, no lunch, and dinner is had after everything else is done - usually around 6-7 pm. So being fat does not mean eating all the time; nor does skipping a meal on a 40 acre farm mean that someone is involved with a kidnapping/murder.

Sorry if I've offended you. And I do mean that sincerely. But your post had nothing to do with anything, and was just mean. Thanks for understanding.

Best-
Herding Cats

O/T..Not telling you what to do, but you really need to eat three times a day or even more for your metabolism to work properly...I'm not saying large amounts of food but three or four small meals a day.. If you don't eat brakfast and don't eat lunch, your body thinks you are starving it and will hold on to everything you put in your stomach when you do.decide to eat.....JMO

 

[Jo in Calif]

Pertaining to the title of this thread. Friends of D's speak out. How many times do we hear of people being in total shock of hearing something of their neighbor or friends being arrested for murder. Sometimes when things like this happen, friends, neighbors and family will say I can't believe it, I had no idea they were capable of doing something like that. We don't know what makes some people capable of doing certain unheard of things, the fact of the matter they do happen. I'm not saying that DD or Terry are in fact guilty of anything, I'm just saying people don't always know what other people are really capable of doing. IMO

 

[Snowball58]

Yeah, I heard she went to another gym other than the usual, that is kinda bizarre, I wonder what gym Dede usually went to, since she shared Terris love of fitness.

Can you tell me where you read this? A link?

I have a theory that DD checked into the gym as TH, to buy TH more time to do whatever she was doing, and if she selected a different gym than her usual spot, it supports my idea (no one would recognize her or know that DD wasn't TH, and DD could have likely even checked Baby K in/out).

 

[cluciano63]

No one wins in these situations. If no one came forward to defend Dede, we would be wondering why she did not have any friends...

 

[ami]

Yeah, I heard she went to another gym other than the usual, that is kinda bizarre, I wonder what gym Dede usually went to, since she shared Terris love of fitness.

Is that true? I thought the gym listed in Kaine's restraining order and the gym listed in the article about her time line were the same.

 

[Herding Cats]

O/T..Not telling you what to do, but you really need to eat three times a day or even more for your metabolism to work properly...I'm not saying large amounts of food but three or four small meals a day.. If you don't eat brakfast and don't eat lunch, your body thinks you are starving it and will hold on to everything you put in your stomach when you do.decide to eat.....JMO

Thanks, Emergalgem...you're totally right. It's hard, though, to make the decision to decide to eat, and then actually carry through. LOL. It is something I do definitely need to work on.

Best-
Herding Cats.

 

[Sidley]

Is that true? I thought the gym listed in Kaine's restraining order and the gym listed in the article about her time line were the same.

I just looked on the thread about TH facts confirmed in the MSM and it states she worked out at 24-hour Fitness in Beaverton on Waterhouse Avenue. I need to look at the RO again, but I don't think that is the same gym Kaine's attorney identified

 

[ami]

Im soooo glad I don't know Terri in any way. Why Desiree and Kaine feel all who do should step forward defies logic....who in their right mind wants to be dragged through the mud and accused of being involved in a murder/abduction OF A CHILD or anyone? :shocked2: De's lucky she can afford a crim defense attorney, not many of us can. How about the promise of anonymity to anyone coming forward???

I would step forward and be as open and low-key as possible. I can't stop thinking: this is a young child, a defenseless young child. A child Dede must have known, if she was friends with Terri. An innocent child, missing and possibly hurt or worse.

Were I confronted by police for one of my friends' missing sons because they thought some conversation I'd had might shed light - or EVEN that I might be involved... I can't imagine that I would be thinking, "my reputation!" at that moment. I'd be amazed that the police would think I had any insider knowledge. I'd be scared, but confident that my innocence could be proven if they had enough knowledge of my life, schedule, history and schedule for June 4th - and perhaps through questioning I would unknowingly give them some missing piece they needed to unlock the mystery.

 

[Emeralgem]

No one wins in these situations. If no one came forward to defend Dede, we would be wondering why she did not have any friends...

No I wouldn't and I haven't.. Never entertained the thought of WHY no friends were coming out to support her before today... All I'm interested in is finding out what happened to Kyron, who is responsible...And IF DeDe knows something she should be talking to police and telling what she knows...A child is missing and IMHO thats more important than her friends defending her while she is covering her rear...JMO

 

[Aedrys]

Originally Posted by Aedrys



This is a series of assumptions not based on any facts. It is an assumption that TH has been trying to contact DS. It is an assumption that DS has cut off TH. It is an assumption that DS asked her friends to come to her defense.



Terri has been silent. Period. She hasn't come to her own defense. At this point, I don't expect her to come to anyone else's defense. At this point, even if she shouted her innocence from the rooftops, most people would diagnose her with some condition that would negate her proclamation of innocence and would, instead, be used as further proof of her guilt (re: NPD, sociopath, MBP, etc.).

And what of Desiree and Kaine's statements about DS and her not being cooperative, advising TH in ways that were not helpful to the investigation? Is it possible that DS told TH to stop talking?



In the post to which I was responding, you said:





Actually, they have an opinion about Terri via their knowledge of Dede:





The lawyers were speculating. It is not a proven fact that DS has requested or has been granted immunity. There could be other reasons DS didn't testify, immunity is only one of them.



These are assumptions about what may or may not have gone on, with very little or no facts to back up those assumptions. Kaine and Desiree said Dede was advising Terri, not vice versa.



That deduction and choice of words was as a result of this statement with periodic emphasis:

If I were Terri, I'd be terrified. Dede sounds like someone you just. don't. cross.



How is debating an opinion not your respecting your right to believe whatever you want to believe? I'm respectfully debating your opinion, not resorting to personal attacks or improper language. On a discussion board, there is discussion. I'm just discussing and debating the complexities of this case and the opinions expressed about it.

You keep mentioning facts. There are no real facts in this case other than the fact that Kyron is missing. Telling me what I believe is not based on facts doesn't do anything. That's not debating, that's just pointing out that all I have is speculation. I never said anything was based on actual fact. You're right, it's just my opinion. But that's all we have in this case. Bring out facts that irrevocably say I'm wrong, then okay, I'm wrong and I'll admit it. But we have no facts in this case, so I am free to speculate what I believe and there is nothing wrong with that. There is no need to tear apart every post of mine and keep saying "there's no facts".

I agree to that! There are no facts! Nothing to tell us what happened here, who did it, how they did it, ANYTHING. So what is left when there are no verifiable facts either way? Speculation. Theorizing. And I will do both until the facts come out to prove that I am wrong. And I respect your right to do the same. Can we just agree to disagree? Is that so hard?

 

[ami]

Is that true? I thought the gym listed in Kaine's restraining order and the gym listed in the article about her time line were the same.

Her regular gym in the RO is listed as 24 hour fitness on Waterhouse Ave in Beaverton.

Kaine's gym is listed as The Edge in Beaverton.

 

[ami]

Oops, didn't mean to quote myself, above, meant to quote Sidley:

I just looked on the thread about TH facts confirmed in the MSM and it states she worked out at 24-hour Fitness in Beaverton on Waterhouse Avenue. I need to look at the RO again, but I don't think that is the same gym Kaine's attorney identified

 

[SurfieTX]

Her regular gym in the RO is listed as 24 hour fitness on Waterhouse Ave in Beaverton.

Kaine's gym is listed as The Edge in Beaverton.

Totally O/T, but I wonder why they went to different gyms? I've haven't joined recently, but don't some of them offer some kind of discount for family members? To me, it just speaks to their relationship. I used to love to work out at the gym with my boyfriend when I was younger, and I would like to now with my husband if finances allowed. It's nice to have a partner to motivate you and with a daycare on site, well...there's nothing I can see that would prohibit it. JMO.

 

[Sidley]

Oops, didn't mean to quote myself, above, meant to quote Sidley:

Thanks, Ami. The Edge in Beaverton was the name of the other gym I knew I had read somewhere but just couldn't remember. I don't think until now I realized that TH and KH belonged to separate gyms.

 

[KopDog]

I would step forward and be as open and low-key as possible. I can't stop thinking: this is a young child, a defenseless young child. A child Dede must have known, if she was friends with Terri. An innocent child, missing and possibly hurt or worse.

Were I confronted by police for one of my friends' missing sons because they thought some conversation I'd had might shed light - or EVEN that I might be involved... I can't imagine that I would be thinking, "my reputation!" at that moment. I'd be amazed that the police would think I had any insider knowledge. I'd be scared, but confident that my innocence could be proven if they had enough knowledge of my life, schedule, history and schedule for June 4th - and perhaps through questioning I would unknowingly give them some missing piece they needed to unlock the mystery.

I think you can do both - you should be able to communicate to police what you know and then try and avoid all else as much as possible. For adults, reputation isn't like it is in high school (who slept w/ who) - this is serious stuff - e.g. - if you have kids, other parents might not want their kids playing with your kids, your career could be seriously impacted, no job, no house, etc. You absolutely have a duty to protect yourself and your family from all this wild speculation. What if DDS is innocent? Look at what is being speculated about her on just these couple pages alone. It is completely unfair and slanderous. If she is innocent, she obviously reached out to TH cuz she is a good friend and so god bless her. I'm guessing if she knew then, what she knows now, she might take a different path. And let's not forget, she wasn't called out just for being a friend - K an D both shouted her name from the rooftops. Sorry to keep going back to the CA story - but when Cindy Anthony was throwing Amy and Jesse under the bus - people were rushing to their defense - all up in arms about such behavior. Same thing on Roy K - how dare people accuse him...he was just trying to do the right thing. Why doesn't the same justice and assumption of innocent apply here?

 

[pittsburghgirl]

I kind of agree with you here. I understand what a lawyer's job is. Doesn't mean I like the no talking part. And if they are guilty, they should have thought about being in a jail cell for their rest of their lives before committing a crime, not afterward in coverup mode. If they're innocent, then they won't go into a jail cell for the rest of their lives, so there should be nothing to worry about. Neither seems to have a record before this, only a DUI for TH. That doesn't equal murder. I can see them being scared about it, but to not talk and fully cooperate only gets them closer to that cell, not further away from it. It just doesn't seem smart to me the way they are handling this, even if their lawyers told them to handle it this way. They're not going to be happy if their lawyers handle them all the way into a jail cell, I would imagine.

The first thing any decent lawyer will tell a client is "let me do the talking." In regard to talking to the media, most people, even actual killers, don't have practice in handling reporters, cameras and interviewers. Nothing good can come out of addressing the media for most people who are somehow "involved" in the case. In regard to talking to LE, it's in the best interest of people who are "friends" of suspects to have a lawyer mediate that discussion as well. Remember, this case already involves a missing child (potentially kidnapping, custodial interference, obstructing justice and murder) and an alleged murder for hire. Anyone on the fringes of this case needs an attorney and should stay out of the media spotlight.

That is not to say that these people (DS, her friends, etc.) shouldn't cooperate with LE in any aspect of the case that involves Kyron. Cooperating with LE is not the same as making public statements about wanting Kyron to come home, etc.

Regarding the bold font: "Innocent" people have the most to lose if they become entangled in a high-profile case that involves people who are missing or dead. They can be tried, found guilty and sent to prison for a laundry list of stuff, including being an accessory after the fact. Innocent people can also be scapegoats for guilty ones. There are many, many innocent people in prison today because they made statements to LE that were misconstrued, not believed, or even (in the worse cases) ignored. Just being charged with a felony can wreck a person's life. Think about the "Have you ever been arrested or charged with a felony?" question on many job applications.

We do not know what any of these people are saying to LE, who is not talking. And we should not equate making public statements about Kyron just to appease public opinion with caring about Kyron or where he is. The first thing a psychopath would do is make seemingly sincere speeches about finding Kyron (see Scott Peterson as a case in point.)

 

[ami]

Totally O/T, but I wonder why they went to different gyms? I've haven't joined recently, but don't some of them offer some kind of discount for family members? To me, it just speaks to their relationship. I used to love to work out at the gym with my boyfriend when I was younger, and I would like to now with my husband if finances allowed. It's nice to have a partner to motivate you and with a daycare on site, well...there's nothing I can see that would prohibit it. JMO.

Good question. Does anyone remember which gym Terri and Kaine went to together after Kyron's disappearance?

I looked up Kaine's gym (Xtreme Edge) and Terri's gym (24 Hour Fitness). Both are in Beaverton, both have good reviews. Terr's has a pool and it doesn't look like Kaine's does. Both have kids clubs.

Kaine's looks much more "hard core" and they emphasize "basic training" that looks pretty serious and militaristic. The employees wear black and white and grey camo pants. Their website is actually kind of fierce. (wish they had one near me, actually...)

Terri's looks a bit cushier and more of what you'd expect in one of the large chain health clubs - they mention "initiation fee" and "monthly dues" - I imagine it's along the lines of a Bally's Fitness or similar. It's probably cleaner and smells better than the Xtreme place.

 

[Tuffy]

Totally O/T, but I wonder why they went to different gyms? I've haven't joined recently, but don't some of them offer some kind of discount for family members? To me, it just speaks to their relationship. I used to love to work out at the gym with my boyfriend when I was younger, and I would like to now with my husband if finances allowed. It's nice to have a partner to motivate you and with a daycare on site, well...there's nothing I can see that would prohibit it. JMO.

Hi Surfie. I just wanted to jump in about the gym. I don't think that not working out as a couple says anything about the state of their relationship. I don't enjoy working out with my husband. He has mentioned us running together, and I don't even want to do that.

Its not that I don't enjoy being around him. I just like to work out alone. I also don't want to be seen all sweaty and stuff, no make up, all that. We do lots together but working out, I'd rather not.

 

[PortlandMama]

Question.. Did she go to her regular gym that day or did she go to another gym?Also, do both gyms have a day care and IF she used a gym she doesn't frequent often, would they even know her and baby K for certain.?

We know which gym she went to that day, according to MSM:

At 11:39 a.m., Terri checked in at a 24-hour Fitness in Beaverton on Waterhouse Avenue and worked out for about an hour until 12:40 p.m.

http://www.katu.com/news/local/99151549.html

To my understanding, that is her usual gym. It does have a Kids' Club.

 

[ami]

I think you can do both - you should be able to communicate to police what you know and then try and avoid all else as much as possible. For adults, reputation isn't like it is in high school (who slept w/ who) - this is serious stuff - e.g. - if you have kids, other parents might not want their kids playing with your kids, your career could be seriously impacted, no job, no house, etc. You absolutely have a duty to protect yourself and your family from all this wild speculation. What if DDS is innocent? Look at what is being speculated about her on just these couple pages alone. It is completely unfair and slanderous. If she is innocent, she obviously reached out to TH cuz she is a good friend and so god bless her. I'm guessing if she knew then, what she knows now, she might take a different path. And let's not forget, she wasn't called out just for being a friend - K an D both shouted her name from the rooftops. Sorry to keep going back to the CA story - but when Cindy Anthony was throwing Amy and Jesse under the bus - people were rushing to their defense - all up in arms about such behavior. Same thing on Roy K - how dare people accuse him...he was just trying to do the right thing. Why doesn't the same justice and assumption of innocent apply here?

All of this makes a lot of sense. I admit the things about DS that bothered me were 1) her smile when she exited after the Grand Jury - she was just asked questions that related to a missing child, and so I find it hard not to dislike her when she comes out literally smiling, and 2) I'd read that she did not answer questions in her time with the GJ.

Beyond those two things I wouldn't have formed any opinion of her at all. I was willing to give anyone the benefit of the doubt even considering Kaine and Desiree's words, simply because I know they are suffering terribly and probably inclined not to trust anyone right now. I would understand almost anyone they had suspicions about whether warranted or not.

It was just that smile she had on her face... Kyron is missing, half of us have tears in our eyes thinking about the questions involved, and she walked out of a Q&A session with a smile. That disturbs me on a human level even while I acknowledge that is not reason enough to suspect her of anything.