Anjelica "AJ" Hadsell's Disappearance from Norfolk, VA - 3 March 2015 #2

[CabinFever]

Please don't think I'm picking on you, but I just want to remind everyone that you do NOT have to wait 24 hours to file a MPR. You can call immediately if you suspect something alarming has happened to the person. It got my goat when in the SMMPAS petition, they said they had to wait 26 hours and that could have made a difference. AJ wasn't even reported missing (but safe) for at least 38 hours, so that makes no sense anyway. Spreading that kind of misinformation could be deadly if someone who has a loved one who is in danger; as we know, most people are killed within a few hours of being abducted.
SBM
Many people are under the impression that you have to wait 3 days or 72 hours before you can report a person missing. This is not the case. It doesn't matter if it is a child, or an adult, you can call the police and file a missing person report as soon as you know they are missing.
http://www.missingpersonsofamerica.com/2011/03/when-can-you-report-person-missing.html

Thank you for pointing this out.
I did think you had to wait 24 hours!!!

Why in the world do they always say this on TV then?

 

[DexterMorgan]

Sadly enough I experienced those same scary circumstances a few times. My daughter is now a healthy, happy successful 23 yr old. But at 17 and 18 she was a bit rebellious and free spirited. Ahem.... She is very beautiful and looked 20 when she was 15---so it was a wild ride through her teen years. :rollercoaster: And she was a model and an actress and worked a lot, so had her own funds and was very independent. Bought her own car and had her own $ so it was rough for us for awhile. She was very responsible but also stubborn and adventurous.

I went through a few incidents when she was home from college, we got in a fight, and she would stomp off, in a huff. VERY SCARY. We took her car keys one time when we found out she had a fake ID for going to clubs---:slap: ---and she left walking at midnight when we fought about it. Luckily her best friend lived a block away. But still very scary stuff.

So all of this to say that I know exactly how JH might have felt when she had not yet heard from her independent, responsible college student, home on break. It is not the same as a high school kid that is expected to be home by midnight. It is an awkward time for parenting and they are spreading their wings and it is rough at times. So when do you call them missing or are they just angry and hanging with their boyfriend? ugghhhhhh....so glad we made it through that minefield.


I will say that in recent months my lovely daughter has told me how grateful she is that we were so protective and attentive. One of her childhood friends recently hung herself and DD says it is partly because she felt unloved. and unsupported by her family:cry: :rose:

Much Obliged. Wonderful outcome.

Don't forget. On occasion. Tell your daughter to join Websleuth.

Once she does.

The realities of life will help her focus more and help her to take proper steps to avoid being a victim.

This way; Mom isn't the only one reminding her to be careful.

Good job.

 

[DexterMorgan]

Please don't think I'm picking on you, but I just want to remind everyone that you do NOT have to wait 24 hours to file a MPR. You can call immediately if you suspect something alarming has happened to the person. It got my goat when in the SMMPAS petition, they said they had to wait 26 hours and that could have made a difference. AJ wasn't even reported missing (but safe) for at least 38 hours, so that makes no sense anyway. Spreading that kind of misinformation could be deadly if someone who has a loved one who is in danger; as we know, most people are killed within a few hours of being abducted.
SBM
Many people are under the impression that you have to wait 3 days or 72 hours before you can report a person missing. This is not the case. It doesn't matter if it is a child, or an adult, you can call the police and file a missing person report as soon as you know they are missing.
http://www.missingpersonsofamerica.com/2011/03/when-can-you-report-person-missing.html

Agree.

A person in distress doesn't calculate the time you have to wait to report a missing person.

So the reasoning of waiting for that purpose doesn't fly with me.

Usually a distraught parent will just do it and let LE say whatever.

But. There is no thought process of having to wait for so many hours of filing a report on your missing kid.


This is no longer the hippie era. Jmo

 

[spamelope]

Thank you for pointing this out.
I did think you had to wait 24 hours!!!

Why in the world do they always say this on TV then?

Most people think that, and it's horrible that they perpetuate it. If SMMPAS wanted to do some good, they could spread the word about that not being true. Tell your friends, tell your family. People need to know they CAN call right away.

 

[spamelope]

Maybe someone can help me out with a link. I distinctly remember WH saying that AJ didn't go out. That she was a homebody, basically. I see her twitter account differently than most, I suppose, because I don't see a partier at all. I see a girl who was annoyed with classmates who weren't prepared and roommates that were noisy. I see a girl committed to her studies, not a stoner. Did she ever partake? Maybe, but I don't get that she did it often. I saw a girl craving OJ, McDonalds, and warmth. And looking forward to the next year when she had her own apartment. Makes me so sad she didn't get to do that. She almost made it.

 

[MsMarple]

Please don't think I'm picking on you, but I just want to remind everyone that you do NOT have to wait 24 hours to file a MPR. You can call immediately if you suspect something alarming has happened to the person. It got my goat when in the SMMPAS petition, they said they had to wait 26 hours and that could have made a difference. AJ wasn't even reported missing (but safe) for at least 38 hours, so that makes no sense anyway. Spreading that kind of misinformation could be deadly if someone who has a loved one who is in danger; as we know, most people are killed within a few hours of being abducted.
SBM
Many people are under the impression that you have to wait 3 days or 72 hours before you can report a person missing. This is not the case. It doesn't matter if it is a child, or an adult, you can call the police and file a missing person report as soon as you know they are missing.
http://www.missingpersonsofamerica.com/2011/03/when-can-you-report-person-missing.html

Thank you for reminding everyone! Virginia has no waiting period for people under the age of 21. I understand that many parents may not realize that but wouldn't you think that someone plugging an "organization" would have also checked? It took all of 5 seconds or so on Google to verify there are no "strictions." SMH.

Plus, neither WH nor JH ever said anything about needing to wait. And frankly, I don't understand the whole thing about exchanging texts at 4:30/5:30 in the morning. My personal experience with my own girls was that when they were home from university they automatically told me if they had plans or were spending the night elsewhere. There was never any "I'm with friends" or "I'm not ready to come home yet" stuff, it was more like "Going to the X concert and spending the night at Y's house."

IOW they let me know about their plans. I didn't demand it, rather they kept me in the loop so I could plan dinner or other family plans accordingly. I'm not casting aspersions at the Hadsells, I'm just curious as to why JH was up in the middle of the night texting with AJ. What caused her to be concerned in the middle of the night? Was her hinky alarm going off?

http://vscc.virginia.gov/Missing Persons_FINAL.pdf

 

[DexterMorgan]

Most people think that, and it's horrible that they perpetuate it. If SMMPAS wanted to do some good, they could spread the word about that not being true. Tell your friends, tell your family. People need to know they CAN call right away.

To tell you the truth. I am very shocked at the people in AJ'S life that even thought about promoting this system in regards to AJ'S case.

Their flyers and website consisted of puzzling last seen time frames and nobody wants to clarify nothing since Wes is now the supposedly poi.

So Iam still confused on why they are using this case to promote that alert system.

You can't say that we need to change things because of AJ's case; But never tried to do something in the first place (regarding AJ's case)

So another question.

Who told JH that she had to wait so many hours to report AJ missing?

 

[MsMarple]

Sadly enough I experienced those same scary circumstances a few times. My daughter is now a healthy, happy successful 23 yr old. But at 17 and 18 she was a bit rebellious and free spirited. Ahem.... She is very beautiful and looked 20 when she was 15---so it was a wild ride through her teen years. :rollercoaster: And she was a model and an actress and worked a lot, so had her own funds and was very independent. Bought her own car and had her own $ so it was rough for us for awhile. She was very responsible but also stubborn and adventurous.

I went through a few incidents when she was home from college, we got in a fight, and she would stomp off, in a huff. VERY SCARY. We took her car keys one time when we found out she had a fake ID for going to clubs---:slap: ---and she left walking at midnight when we fought about it. Luckily her best friend lived a block away. But still very scary stuff.

So all of this to say that I know exactly how JH might have felt when she had not yet heard from her independent, responsible college student, home on break. It is not the same as a high school kid that is expected to be home by midnight. It is an awkward time for parenting and they are spreading their wings and it is rough at times. So when do you call them missing or are they just angry and hanging with their boyfriend? ugghhhhhh....so glad we made it through that minefield.


I will say that in recent months my lovely daughter has told me how grateful she is that we were so protective and attentive. One of her childhood friends recently hung herself and DD says it is partly because she felt unloved. and unsupported by her family:cry: :rose:

Thanks katydid - I saw this after I posted (I'm soooo slow at composing) and it helped me to understand a little better.

:loveyou:

 

[DexterMorgan]

Maybe someone can help me out with a link. I distinctly remember WH saying that AJ didn't go out. That she was a homebody, basically. I see her twitter account differently than most, I suppose, because I don't see a partier at all. I see a girl who was annoyed with classmates who weren't prepared and roommates that were noisy. I see a girl committed to her studies, not a stoner. Did she ever partake? Maybe, but I don't get that she did it often. I saw a girl craving OJ, McDonalds, and warmth. And looking forward to the next year when she had her own apartment. Makes me so sad she didn't get to do that. She almost made it.

Let's not forget. How good water taste after a nice work out.

My girl Aj.

Much oblige.

After being a alcoholic and just starting back to doing the right things and working out.

I now remember her point about water tasting very refreshing after a work out or practice.

My girl.

 

[Lilibet]

Agree.

A person in distress doesn't calculate the time you have to wait to report a missing person.

So the reasoning of waiting for that purpose doesn't fly with me.

Usually a distraught parent will just do it and let LE say whatever.

But. There is no thought process of having to wait for so many hours of filing a report on your missing kid.


This is no longer the hippie era. Jmo

I don't disagree, but I think this quote from the link makes it clear that LE may not be in a hurry to look for your missing loved one immediately, no matter how quickly you file a report.

You should also consider before you file the report it they are really missing. Sometimes people will disappear for many reasons. They are mad and need a cool down period or they are depressed and want to be alone. It is not against the law to be missing, so you may find the police will not be in a rush to locate them as you are,

So IMO they will expect you to have made phone calls and other efforts to locate your adult loved one before filing a report. If you've done that, they are more likely to take the situation seriously. Those efforts certainly don't need to take 24 hours in most cases. But I can see that it might take longer for a family to ask around, get answers and then realize that a report needs to be made. That seems to be what happened with AJ's family for some reason. We just don't really know if the delay was for a nefarious reason or not. I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt on that...for now. JMO

http://www.missingpersonsofamerica.com/2011/03/when-can-you-report-person-missing.html

 

[Linda 61]

I would ask why did WH and JH keep saying AJ was "safe". What made them think that? I aways thought that was so strange.

Now back to lurking I go...

 

[spamelope]

To tell you the truth. I am very shocked at the people in AJ'S life that even thought about promoting this system in regards to AJ'S case.

Their flyers and website consisted of puzzling last seen time frames and nobody wants to clarify nothing since Wes is now the supposedly poi.

So Iam still confused on why they are using this case to promote that alert system.

You can't say that we need to change things because of AJ's case; But never tried to do something in the first place (regarding AJ's case)

So another question.

Who told JH that she had to wait so many hours to report AJ missing?

IMO No, one told her that. And if they did, why didn't she call at 24 or 26 hours? If I were following the "strictions", I would have called at 24 hours and one second. And I agree with all that you said.

 

[spamelope]

Let's not forget. How good water taste after a nice work out.

My girl Aj.

Much oblige.

After being a alcoholic and just starting back to doing the right things and working out.

I now remember her point about water tasting very refreshing after a work out or practice.

My girl.

Boom!
Made me cry.
Such a simple thing, but to me, that's how I view AJ.
A hardworking athlete, not some druggie.
A girl whose goodness made her shine especially bright considering her surroundings.

 

[spamelope]

I don't disagree, but I think this quote from the link makes it clear that LE may not be in a hurry to look for your missing loved one immediately, no matter how quickly you file a report.



So IMO they will expect you to have made phone calls and other efforts to locate your adult loved one before filing a report. If you've done that, they are more likely to take the situation seriously. Those efforts certainly don't need to take 24 hours in most cases. But I can see that it might take longer for a family to ask around, get answers and then realize that a report needs to be made. That seems to be what happened with AJ's family for some reason. We just don't really know if the delay was for a nefarious reason or not. I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt on that...for now. JMO

http://www.missingpersonsofamerica.com/2011/03/when-can-you-report-person-missing.html

But if you think that someone else has your daughter's phone and is impersonating her, that makes it more urgent. Especially when you also have bullets missing.

 

[DexterMorgan]

I don't disagree, but I think this quote from the link makes it clear that LE may not be in a hurry to look for your missing loved one immediately, no matter how quickly you file a report.



So IMO they will expect you to have made phone calls and other efforts to locate your adult loved one before filing a report. If you've done that, they are more likely to take the situation seriously. Those efforts certainly don't need to take 24 hours in most cases. But I can see that it might take longer for a family to ask around, get answers and then realize that a report needs to be made. That seems to be what happened with AJ's family for some reason. We just don't really know if the delay was for a nefarious reason or not. I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt on that...for now. JMO

http://www.missingpersonsofamerica.com/2011/03/when-can-you-report-person-missing.html

Agree. I give them the benefit of doubt as well.

I just hate hearing that they thought that they had to wait so many hours which made them not call.


If all leads are depleted; Then call irregardless.

LE may not start searches. But they will atleast document something.

Did anyone call LE and say my loved one is missing and I exhausted all leads; but do I have to wait more hours?

Or did they let someone else convince them to not even try LE until so many hours later?

Lol. Sometimes i speak to a customer services rep who says there is nothing we can do.

But if I feel strong enough about my situation; I will say; Put your boss on the phone.

I don't go by anyone standards. Of nothing we can do; If i feel things are not right. Jmo

PUT YOUR BOSS ON THE PHONE.

LOL.

JMO

 

[Happyshoes]

Eileen, I adore you! Had to say that. Where would our little darling have gone? As far as phone calls go, anybody could have called and asked for her help and she would have gone. Was there a purpose in her last movements? I agree with CabinFever, too, what caused them to finally say "Ok, we're not waiting any longer..." and what was done in the meantime?

 

[Happyshoes]

But if you think that someone else has your daughter's phone and is impersonating her, that makes it more urgent. Especially when you also have bullets missing.

IMO, I think JH knew that the ammo was w/WH. She couldn't have wanted that left there. (He didn't need it in that hotel, either, I just think he was thinking of future practice). I think that's why she said she felt AJ was "safe" and just at a friends house, not answering her phone, - and maybe because she knew she was angry at her, too. But when she got that 5:30am text, I think she must have gone into action. The most important thing IMO was to have the flyer out there w/NPD's #. I have mixed feelings about that. WH's idea? Probably.

 

[RunDaSurf]

Was I the only one cynical enough to think SMMPAS might be misdirection to take suspicion away from them waiting to report her missing in the first place?

 

[cluciano63]

Wouldn't a parent or spouse just call police anyway? And ask if there is a waiting period? Not just "assume" there is? That is what I never understand.

 

[katydid23]

But if you think that someone else has your daughter's phone and is impersonating her, that makes it more urgent. Especially when you also have bullets missing.

EXACTLY. If I had ever thought someone else was texting me instead of my daughter, when she was 'taking a break from us because we were nutso parentals'---I would have freaked and called 911 immediately. And sometimes I would ask her things like ' where's your puppies leash' just to make sure it was really her. She thought I was even more nuts but I had my reasons, lol.