Boy's Adoption Plea

[michmi]

"Adoption service under fire as it's revealed Davion Only - the boy who begged churchgoers to adopt him - is STILL not in a permanent home despite dozens of families being turned away"

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...home-despite-dozens-families-turned-away.html

This is criminal, it really is---you can't tell me that out of all those families nobody was suitable. And according to the article, Davion is no longer "allowed" to talk to media.

'Something doesn’t seem right. I pray about it,' said his mentor, Richard Prince, 22.

'He’s changed schools and foster homes, and he’s not allowed to tell me certain things. People want to hear a happy ending, but it’s not too clear what’s going on.'

More than 300 people contacted the Times last fall saying they couldn’t get in touch with anyone at Davion’s foster agency, Eckerd.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...ozens-families-turned-away.html#ixzz2wqe5qPQL
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[Blondie in Spokane]

Orphan Davion Only who became famous when he made emotional plea for a 'forever home' in church is thrown out by adoptive parents after fight

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...-prospective-family-physical-altercation.html

 

[Ausgirl]

from the link above:

There was allegedly a physical altercation between Only and another child and the pastor
The boy's case manager flew him back to Florida
Eckerd, his adoption agency, has refused to allow him to be interviewed and his Facebook page has been closed
The Florida teenager, has bounced around foster care his whole life
He has lived with four different families since his September plea
A spokesperson for Eckerd says Only is receiving treatment and that they will re-visit potential families for the boy when he's ready

____

The couple, a minister and his wife, flew Davion up to visit over spring break. They introduced him to their three children and took him to church. Davion came back to Florida just long enough to pack a small suitcase.

Then he returned to Ohio, where his prospective parents signed him up to play football - something he had always wanted to do.

The adoption could take place in 90 days, said Terri Durdaller, whose agency, Eckerd, oversees Tampa Bay's foster children. That would have meant that Davion could be adopted this month.

Instead, he is back in Pinellas County, at a therapeutic foster home, upset and embarrassed, unwilling to talk.'There was an incident in Ohio,' said Eckerd's director, Lorita Shirley. At one point, she said, things got physical between Davion and another child in the house, and with the dad. The family wanted him out.

____


Well. That was very Christian of them.

Sounds to me like they were in NO way prepared for a kid who was not passive, obedient and 100% grateful. Certainly, not prepared for a child who's been institutionalised all his life.

And of course, they'd rather chuck him back in the system than seek the extensive help he'd need. I wonder how they treated the other kid....

I feel slightly ill after reading that. I hope this family -and- the adoption agency are feeling bad about themselves.

I hate that the agency have silenced this boy.

 

[Blondie in Spokane]

EXCLUSIVE - 'Davion's our blood. He belongs with his real family': Teen's aunt says she wants to take in orphan nephew after he was kicked out by foster parents

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...phew-kicked-foster-parents.html#ixzz36XnbmzKw

 

[jjenny]

Orphan Davion Only who became famous when he made emotional plea for a 'forever home' in church is thrown out by adoptive parents after fight

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...-prospective-family-physical-altercation.html

It's very hard to adjust to adopting a teenager. Especially one who has some issues.
It doesn't always (or even usually) work out.

 

[Ausgirl]

Then the structure in which these kids are being adopted by families needs overhauling, and a ton more help and support given to the adoptive families in order that they both have a better chance of adjusting.

This young man will be an adult very soon, and will never have known parents who will see him through the hard times, both within him and around him. It's impossible for me to simply shrug about that. Especially as he's just one of so many in desperate need.

 

[Linda7NJ]

This child should have NEVER been placed in a home with younger or smaller children. IMO

Reading between the lines here...IMO this child is dangerous. He's probably where he needs to be. Hopefully he will get the help he needs to become a law abiding citizen and productive member of society.
The state makes a terrible parent, when they take over that responsibility..more effort needs to be made to "get it right"

All IMO


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[Linda7NJ]

There is no shortage of available children waiting for a home.
http://www.adoptuskids.org/meet-the-children/state-photolists


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[Ausgirl]

To be fair here - we *don't know* if this boy is "dangerous"....

We don't know what the other child said or did, we don't know who started it, we don't know the dynamics of that family, whether that foster father over-reacted - we know nothing, except there was altercation of some kind, and the boy in question was packed off back to the system quick smart. Which is a crappy response, IMO.

I am sure there's foster parents who are unaware of just how terrible their own kids can be to fosters. In my own experience - pretty damn terrible! Some foster parents delight in mouthing off about how awful the child's natural parents are - in front of them. Some foster parents raise their kids like little tin soldiers, and simply cannot comprehend that their 'wholesome' lifestyle isn't a/ perfect for everyone and b/ the instant cure for a lifetime of parental neglect.

So before we start labelling this child - who clearly was desperate for a chance to live with a family - as "dangerous", it might be wise to consider that we do not have all the information -- and trust me, it's not *always* the fault of the foster child when things go utterly pear-shaped.

 

[Linda7NJ]

To be fair here - we *don't know* if this boy is "dangerous"....

We don't know what the other child said or did, we don't know who started it, we don't know the dynamics of that family, whether that foster father over-reacted - we know nothing, except there was altercation of some kind, and the boy in question was packed off back to the system quick smart. Which is a crappy response, IMO.

I am sure there's foster parents who are unaware of just how terrible their own kids can be to fosters. In my own experience - pretty damn terrible! Some foster parents delight in mouthing off about how awful the child's natural parents are - in front of them. Some foster parents raise their kids like little tin soldiers, and simply cannot comprehend that their 'wholesome' lifestyle isn't a/ perfect for everyone and b/ the instant cure for a lifetime of parental neglect.

So before we start labelling this child - who clearly was desperate for a chance to live with a family - as "dangerous", it might be wise to consider that we do not have all the information -- and trust me, it's not *always* the fault of the foster child when things go utterly pear-shaped.

All true and certainly a possibility. However, I sincerely doubt it.

IMO a child raised in foster-care his entire life...... is more of a failure of the state. It says more about the system than it does this boy, regardless of whatever happened.



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[jjenny]

There is no shortage of available children waiting for a home.
http://www.adoptuskids.org/meet-the-children/state-photolists


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While that might be so, most of these kids are older, and many have severe special needs. That most people are not equipped to handle.

 

[Linda7NJ]

While that might be so, most of these kids are older, and many have severe special needs. That most people are not equipped to handle.

This child has severe special needs.

My point was......this particular boy is by no means special. There are countless THOUSANDS waiting and wanting a home.
IMO

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[ditchinzimbabwe]

This child has severe special needs.

My point was......this particular boy is by no means special. There are countless THOUSANDS waiting and wanting a home.
IMO

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I think Davion (or, as you call him, "this child") is absolutely special. As are each and every one of the "countless thousands others waiting for a home". They are not countless--I count many of them... by name every day at work--and each and every single one of these children have as many unique needs, hopes, and dreams as any other child not in foster care due to the mistreatment inflicted on them by the very hands that should have been preventing and protecting them. In the end though, perhaps there is something that makes every child (foster care or not) "not special": they all yearn for the same thing--some may admit it more readily or appropriately in words or behaviors--to be loved unconditionally in a safe and stable environment.

 

[Ausgirl]

I think Davion (or, as you call him, "this child") is absolutely special. As are each and every one of the "countless thousands others waiting for a home". They are not countless--I count many of them... by name every day at work--and each and every single one of these children have as many unique needs, hopes, and dreams as any other child not in foster care due to the mistreatment inflicted on them by the very hands that should have been preventing and protecting them. In the end though, perhaps there is something that makes every child (foster care or not) "not special": they all yearn for the same thing--some may admit it more readily or appropriately in words or behaviors--to be loved unconditionally in a safe and stable environment.

...the thanks button isn't enough.

Thank you so much for those words.

 

[Linda7NJ]

I think Davion (or, as you call him, "this child") is absolutely special. As are each and every one of the "countless thousands others waiting for a home". They are not countless--I count many of them... by name every day at work--and each and every single one of these children have as many unique needs, hopes, and dreams as any other child not in foster care due to the mistreatment inflicted on them by the very hands that should have been preventing and protecting them. In the end though, perhaps there is something that makes every child (foster care or not) "not special": they all yearn for the same thing--some may admit it more readily or appropriately in words or behaviors--to be loved unconditionally in a safe and stable environment.

Yeah, thats terrific.

But sometimes "love" isn't enough to overcome the horrors of their pasts.

Sometimes, the damage done is too much to overcome and as a result, some children aren't SAFE to place in a home with younger, smaller or weaker children.
Some children are better suited to the structure and 24/7 supervision a therapeutic residential facility can provide.

That's just the way it is.

When I said, "countless thousands" I was referring to the outpouring of interest this particular child received after having his story in the media.
The vast majority of people prefer to remain ignorant to the THOUSANDS in the same boat. I'm just letting hem all know, if someone scoops this one up...there are plenty more waiting....






IMO



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[Blondie in Spokane]

'I always thought of you as my mom': Boy, 16, who made church plea to be adopted only to be sent back by minister who took him in finally finds a family with his caseworker

Davion Only, 16, captured hearts around the nation in 2013 when he made a plea in front of church congregation for a family to 'love him forever'

He was adopted by a minister in Ohio but sent back into the system a few months later when he fought with one of the minister's children

In the next year he was shuttled between four different homes and four schools in Florida before calling his old caseworker, Connie Bell Going

Davion called and asked Miss Connie if she would adopt him last July

Going agreed, and in February they signed court papers to officially make Davion her son, which should take effect April 22

'I guess I always thought of you as my mom,' Davion said to Going last December

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...ly-finds-family-caseworker.html#ixzz3X3UTAhnN

 

[jjenny]

So glad to hear this story has a happy ending.
:loveyou: