CA CA - Bob Harrod, 81, Orange County, 27 July 2009 - # 4

[believe09]

Dream, I am familiar with the hurdles for AMW...I have done a packet for a family before. I can take on this task unless anyone else has started the process?

I am really, really interested in People as well.

 

[Montjoy]

The daughters did not begin posting ill of their father at first, quite the contrary. The tone of their posts changed over time and in response to comments posted by others and their bewilderment over the curious behavior of their father's new wife, essentially a stranger to them.

(Respectfully snipped.)

You're right, there were some positive, hopeful messages about Bob initially, but the time it took for antagonism to emerge was not that long.

On 6 Aug 09, R posted on IS that Bob "had been very bizarre and secretive since our Mother passed away last year", and on the same day suggested that her father 'bit off more than he could chew'.

On 9 Aug 09, R posted on IS that the barber (since cleared) "bilked our Mother's Blood money -- money D could certainly have spent to improve the conditions of Mom's care, but refused to".

On 9 Aug 09, R posted on IS: "Why wouldn't he take his friggen dirty $$$ with him, then we wouldn't think we were expected to properly manage things in his absence. Also, if he did this, it is cruel to Fontelle and unforgiveable (sic)!"

On 9 Aug 09, R posted on IS: "He pushed his family away and became even more secretive. We now know more about what his single-minded secret was that IMHO he was so ashamed of as to push family away. Definately (sic) NOT the same person we remember going to church when we were little, only to end up selling out to the devil IMHO."

In short, the hopeful messages were quite quickly overwhelmed by and washed away with antagonism and finger pointing.

 

[Montjoy]

Actually, fwiw, any publicity in a missing persons case is gold. It is akin to the lottery. It doesnt matter if it is about the bushes in front of his house-the fact that his name is out there and that there is substantial media is spectacular.

In reference to something I believe you wrote elsewhere on this page, there may be no handbook for the families of missing people, but if there were, I would hope this would be included. I laughed when I read about the bushes, but you are 100% correct. I guess that's why I posted some of those comments on the media -- they seemed odd, counterproductive, contrary to the pursuit of Bob's return or information about his disappearance. The media should be embraced, not accused of creating a circus that keeps Bob away, or of failing to give enough attention to the daughters (who, as has been noted, frequently declined to speak with the media anyhow).

 

[believe09]

I know, I was being silly about the bushes but you got the point, Montjoy. I am thrilled that there is a chance to bring his case to a wider pool. This would be an ideal time to correct any inconsistencies and put the focus back where it belongs...on Bob and away from the drama for lack of a better word.

 

[Kat]

Actually, fwiw, any publicity in a missing persons case is gold. It is akin to the lottery. It doesnt matter if it is about the bushes in front of his house-the fact that his name is out there and that there is substantial media is spectacular. We need more. It needs to be even more recognized nationally. Because that is what brings in those little tips that turn things around; that is what causes someone who may be close to the case to be willing to do the right thing and stand up for this 81 year old man who could not have possibly deserved whatever happened to him.

I just had to bump this believe!

I bolded a portion of it too. If I could bold it, capitalize it, make it in brail, put it to a soundbite I would!

There are literally thousands of missing people who do not have media attention and in fact, never had their name mentioned in any media outlet.

Yes it is the lottery. Any media attention is better than no media attention I agree with all my heart.

JMHO.

 

[believe09]

:blushing:

Thanks Kat....I "believe" it with all of my heart fwiw.

 

[believe09]

(Respectfully snipped.)

You're right, there were some positive, hopeful messages about Bob initially, but the time it took for antagonism to emerge was not that long.

On 6 Aug 09, R posted on IS that Bob "had been very bizarre and secretive since our Mother passed away last year", and on the same day suggested that her father 'bit off more than he could chew'.

On 9 Aug 09, R posted on IS that the barber (since cleared) "bilked our Mother's Blood money -- money D could certainly have spent to improve the conditions of Mom's care, but refused to".

On 9 Aug 09, R posted on IS: "Why wouldn't he take his friggen dirty $$$ with him, then we wouldn't think we were expected to properly manage things in his absence. Also, if he did this, it is cruel to Fontelle and unforgiveable (sic)!"

On 9 Aug 09, R posted on IS: "He pushed his family away and became even more secretive. We now know more about what his single-minded secret was that IMHO he was so ashamed of as to push family away. Definately (sic) NOT the same person we remember going to church when we were little, only to end up selling out to the devil IMHO."

In short, the hopeful messages were quite quickly overwhelmed by and washed away with antagonism and finger pointing.

Everytime I tell myself not to jump...I can't help it. Basically, the implication is that Bob let his wife suffer because he slipped a portion of his assets to someone who was eventually and rapidly cleared from any involvement.

Even IF tens of thousand of dollars changed hands the estate and trusts are worth millions, right? It is hard to imagine that a loan, or financial gift would have impacted him in such a way that he caused his wife of many years to suffer. IIRC the hairdresser was kind enough to come to the home and do Georgia Harrod's hair when she was unable to easily travel. Someone arranged for this and someone paid for it. I dont think it was the children or grandchildren only because IIRC Bob was supporting them. He owned their houses, he gave them cash gifts etc...doesnt sound much like a hard hearted guy. JMO

Hey, I wonder if their has been any movement on the UID vs Mr. Harrod for comparison...I am going to check...BRB.

 

[Montjoy]

I'm glad you picked up on that, Believe -- I had wanted to edit my post to note that from what I can remember reading, Bob was a very dedicated and devoted caregiver to Georgia when her health was failing. I recall that he was always by her side, had modifications made to the house, and eventually had a hospital bed moved in. I remember reading these things because they increased my sympathy for Bob (just as references to 'blood money' might have the opposite effect).

 

[believe09]

Yes, IIRC he cleared out the dining room so that she would have a comfortable place to be.

I will let you know if I hear back from the San Bernadino County MedEx who is handling the UID. He is a spectacular human being, as Cubby already noted, so I feel confident I will hear by return email or phone call.

Peace all...

 

[dreamweaver]

Dream, I am familiar with the hurdles for AMW...I have done a packet for a family before. I can take on this task unless anyone else has started the process?

I am really, really interested in People as well.

believe09: I have not started any process with AMW for Robert Harrod.
It has been at least 18 mths since I last worked with a family re: AMW.

 

[dreamweaver]

In reference to something I believe you wrote elsewhere on this page, there may be no handbook for the families of missing people, but if there were, I would hope this would be included. I laughed when I read about the bushes, but you are 100% correct. I guess that's why I posted some of those comments on the media -- they seemed odd, counterproductive, contrary to the pursuit of Bob's return or information about his disappearance. The media should be embraced, not accused of creating a circus that keeps Bob away, or of failing to give enough attention to the daughters (who, as has been noted, frequently declined to speak with the media anyhow).

There are several excellent 'handbooks' for families of missing people. That does include the one here on WS.
Even the federal government has a handbook.
AMW has an excellent video series about how to raise awareness for a missing person. It was done by someone who jumped in to help on a missing person case.

fwiw: Family of Robert Harrod did receive these links to 'handbooks.'

 

[dreamweaver]

Sorry for all of the back to back posts-the producer I have been referencing and I spoke at length yesterday. There is clear interest-the good news is that this will give everyone from Fontelle to the daughters to grandsome to SIL the opportunity to participate in drawing attention to this case.

Pretty cool I have to say...and it is never too late to make up for lost time.

YAY. Yay. YAY!!!!!!!
:dance::dance::dance:

 

[Angelo]

07-25-2010, 09:24 AM
CA Exile

Angelo wins the prize. She hit the nail on the head! That is where I am going to start, with Bob and Fontelle. This is what Bob told me. It may differ from what you read in the paper a little. You will see why when you read it.

Bob knew Fontelle back in MO. He was going into the marines and being shipped out to CA. Before he left, he gave Fontelle a ring. I was what some people call a "promise ring". He told Fontelle that if the strain of having a long distance relationship would be too much for her, he would understand. Therefore, he would leave it up to her how the relationship would turn out.
He stayed in Pasadena at Georgia's house. I do not remember how he knew the family, but he did. Apparently someone in the house, don't know if it was a father or brother, wanted Bob and Georgia to get together. Bob never received any of the letters Fontelle had sent him. They were either returned or destroyed or whatever. Bob had thought Fontelle had given up on him.
Meanwhile, Bob got to know Georgia and fell in love with her. They got married, had kids, jobs, mortgages, etc. Fontelle had become a distant memory for him. He went on with his life. At the same time, Fontelle believed the same about Bob. She married, had kids, etc. She went on with her life.
http://www.websleuths.com/forums/showthread.php?t=87453&page=24

Snipped~~

I brought this post over from a previous thread. CaExile is relating what was told to him by Mr. Harrod regarding the circumstances surrounding his relationship and parting with Fontelle years before.

Last year daughter P posted a completely different version which she claims was told to her by Mr. Harrod.

"D told me that he thought he was going to Korea and that he would not come back, so he said that he would NOT write her and for her NOT to write him, yet she states that she did write and her letters were opened ."

 

[Montjoy]

I do not believe his family members were about getting attention for themselves at all.

On this point -- daughter P writes on IS, 13 Aug 09: "Hope that you understand that all we have heard is poor "F", she is the victim. Well guess what, there are many more victims that the news reading and listening public does not even know about, because the PD gives us the impression that we are NOT important."

Thing is, Bob should be seen as the victim, here.

 

[believe09]

Montjoy, Bob IS the victim. His family and Fontelle's family are collateral damage. I stand firm in my belief of that. We gathered here for him. He is our cause on this thread and unraveling the events have proven to be a heart-rending experience. I feel terrible for him and what he might have gone through. Again I am struck by the differences in opinion between the daughters and his wife, as well as with his treasured friend. His treasured friend was clearly energized and warmed by this friendship. It was one he continued in spite of relocating.

It just doesnt jibe with the portrait being painted online by his flesh and blood.

 

[Cubby]

On this point -- daughter P writes on IS, 13 Aug 09: "Hope that you understand that all we have heard is poor "F", she is the victim. Well guess what, there are many more victims that the news reading and listening public does not even know about, because the PD gives us the impression that we are NOT important."

Thing is, Bob should be seen as the victim, here.

As much as my step mom has at times annoyed me, the heavens and mountains would have had to be moved by the Almighty himself for myself or siblings to discuss either of our parents like this after a remarriage - Let alone a MISSING parent.


BOB IS the victim.
BOB who who we are ADVOCATING for.

Any old baggage Bobs daughters have with losing their mother and their fathers remarriage really should be dealt with a therapist and not on forums for missing persons.

JMVHO

 

[suzyq211]

When I first started reading the IS thread, I went into it like alot of people might...hmmm, it must be the new wife! Then the more I progressed and read post after post by his daughters of RH's greed, callousness, selfishness and tight-fistedness, I became deeply disturbed. IMO these daughters were not trying to find their father, they were trying to put a spin on things out there! It is so obvious that there was an agenda, and not in a good way! Everything on IS and ROTW was nothing more than an outcry for pity and attention.

Everytime I come across one of those posts, I think of the last part of RH's interview on KTLA...when he chokes up and can barely talk. I think of the man who stayed by his dying wife's side till the end.THAT is the man we are looking for!

http://www.ktla.com/videobeta/?watchId=787b9661-cce5-40f4-ae8a-ec7b54c23643

 

[Fairy1]

As much as my step mom has at times annoyed me, the heavens and mountains would have had to be moved by the Almighty himself for myself or siblings to discuss either of our parents like this after a remarriage - Let alone a MISSING parent.


BOB IS the victim.
BOB who who we are ADVOCATING for.

Any old baggage Bobs daughters have with losing their mother and their fathers remarriage really should be dealt with a therapist and not on forums for missing persons.

JMVHO

Of course, you are absolutely right, Cubby. But you have to admit, those publicly posted statements have given us insight (such as it is) into the dynamics of this family that we rarely, if ever, see on missing persons cases. They have also made it possible to see questionable details with regard to the timeline and most certainly, a possible motive.

IIRC, the comments on IS were not at all negative in the very beginning. I've already mentioned my pathetic memory, so hope someone else who was following there can back me up on this. But I recall the daughters initially pleading for help finding their father. It was a bit before it took a darker turn. In retrospect, I would guess that had a lot to do with F deciding to stay in the home and stake her claim. Seems it went downhill from there. Fast.

 

[ShowMe]

SNIPPED

... I dont think it was the children or grandchildren only because IIRC Bob was supporting them. He owned their houses, he gave ...

Please provide a valid LINK.

No rumor please.

Thank you.

 

[Fairy1]

Actually, fwiw, any publicity in a missing persons case is gold. It is akin to the lottery. It doesnt matter if it is about the bushes in front of his house-the fact that his name is out there and that there is substantial media is spectacular. We need more. It needs to be even more recognized nationally. Because that is what brings in those little tips that turn things around; that is what causes someone who may be close to the case to be willing to do the right thing and stand up for this 81 year old man who could not have possibly deserved whatever happened to him.

Truer words have never been written b09! You know what they say in the celebrity world - any press is good press!

It is tragic to really see how few missing persons cases EVER make the news or pick up any media at all. I realize the whole Bob + Fontelle angle has been what has put this story in the news and I respect that. Still, a man is missing. Over a year later. And NO ONE is actually looking for him.

There are plenty of people claiming to "miss" him and "worry" about him and want to "find" him. IS ANYONE ACTUALLY LOOKING FOR BOB?

Even if LE is focusing on WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE, they are not looking for Bob.

As an aside....I have NO designer shoes ( I HATE shoes entirely). All from Payless or Target (and sometimes Kohl's). And when I'm beating the bushes, I usually have boots on! But thank you, B09! You made me seem fabulous! I am not.