I spent some time a few years ago on a Psych Forums thread which was meant to be a support for pedophiles not wanting to offend. I learned A LOT. I was trying to understand what they are thinking. I often could not be on there reading posts for more than 10 minutes as it was very disturbing to read how they justified themselves. Some of my observations...
There are pedophiles who manage to hold their urges in check. Some are afraid they might abuse their own children, so they do not marry or have kids. They feel isolated and alone with their feelings and know they are hated by society. These are the pedophiles who realize their desires are not normal, and that to act on them would hurt children. They resist child




for fear of the knock on the door, being exposed to loved ones, losing everything and jailtime. Also because they are afraid




could open the floodgates inside of them. These are the ones who deserve counselling and support.
Then there are the pedophiles who flirt around the edges. They will do want they can get away with. They think their fantasies are OK and convince themselves that they really just love children. Every opportunity they see to touch a child, they will take. Yes, they may even choose their job to be around children. For stretches of time, they may do nothing but watch and wait to get close to a vulnerable child. They are building up a huge fantasy world in their heads. Relatives like siblings, nieces, nephews and cousins seem to be especially at risk because of the access they have to them.
These can not be changed until they see what they are doing is wrong and hurtful.
Then there are the very scary pedophiles who dream of possessing and dominating children, including raping them. They will groom a child for years if need be. They will offend often and in very terrible ways. Their fantasies are truly awful as they get pleasure from causing pain. These can never be changed in my opinion.
This thread was eventually closed because I and another person discovered through private messages we received and reported, that there was a pedophile




ring started through contacts from that forum. They were actively recruiting people to exchange stories and pictures of child




. Can you believe it? The mods acted quickly to shut it down.
I just feel sorry for the few on there who I believe sincerely came for support to not offend, but honestly, in my opinion, those who were dedicated to not acting on their desires were in the minority. Guard your children and grandchildren, and be on the alert for these sly predators.