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I feel like Barry was minimizing Suzanne’s contribution in the marriage with the ATM comment. I will await further information as to whether he withheld funds, or if he meant that he was the sole breadwinner. I’m thinking he believed that as the man of the house, he was entitled to make all the decisions. I bet that what Barry decided was usually the rule in the house. Suzanne drove a nice SUV, had beautiful clothes, and went on many trips without Barry. I think he probably believed that he could grant or deny Suzanne’s spending as he saw fit.
I believe what he meant, precisely, is that Suzanne had no access to cash unless he gave it to her. That's what he meant and that's how I think most people would take that comment. She didn't need an ATM card.
This is a really common tactic of the controlling, abusive spouse. It does beg the question of how Suzanne funded her GreenDot account. I suspect she had ways around him - especially since he looks so disorganized. I'm guessing those pendaflex folders held Suzanne's work for his business as well as their personal life. She did the filing - I am not sure he withheld statements from her, someone had to file taxes at some time. By filing, I mean the physical work of opening things, throwing away inserts, and then properly filing them. It was part of her household duty.
He gets concerned that he has no clue about her system and realizes after she's gone that he has no one to yell at, with his urgent questions how about how much he spent on this or that landscaping job/purchase. His urgent questions about their personal funds (how much cash did he actually have??) would have been high on his list of priorities at that time.