Agatha_C
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(My Bold)
As a matter of fact I do (LOL). Is anyone surprised? Let me remind everyone again, my hubby is an expert in the field of Child Psychology and used as such in our courts of law. Add to it our years in foster care and I would say yeah, on this I know what Im talking about (not that I know it all).
As we all know, some mental illnesses are hereditary and the P's were proof of that in my opinion. Yet to say that BR had inherited said infliction would be hard to determine unless you knew the child well, such as parent, close friends, family and or care givers. Most signs that a child would give could also be called normal child behaviours, making it difficult to determine without prolonged medical observation. With that said, its not far fetched to say that BR could have inherited his families mental genetics.
However, its my opinion that BR suffered from abuse, emotional neglect to be exact as well as the same measure of perfection that Nedra had used on the P sisters, namely Patsy and the stress that comes with that; Only I dont think he ever measured up to her standards in those days. He was unremarkable compared to JBR.
JR was always gone on business and PR was always focused on JBR and the pageants. Think about it, what could BR have ever done that would equal the Miss America Pageant. BR could have never given PR that, nor could he come close.
Its my opinion that sibling rivalry could have ended up, sibling abuse. Let me give you some info and links on this very topic.
Few experts agree on how extensive sibling abuse is, or where sibling conflict ends and abuse begins. It is rarely studied: only two major national studies, a handful of academic papers and a few specialized books have looked at it in the last quarter-century. And it is as easy to over-dramatize as it is to underestimate.
In 1980, when the sociologist Murray Straus of the University of New Hampshire published "Behind Closed Doors," a groundbreaking national study of family violence, he concluded that the sibling relationship was the most violent of human bonds. Judged strictly by counting blows, he was right: Dr. Straus and his colleagues found that 74 percent of a representative sample of children had pushed or shoved a sibling within the year and 42 percent had kicked, bitten or punched a brother or sister. (Only 3 percent of parents had attacked a child that violently, and only 3 percent of husbands had physically attacked their wives.)
John V. Caffaro, a clinical psychologist and family therapist in private practice in the San Diego suburb Del Mar, defines sibling abuse as a pattern of repeated violence and intimidation.
In an interview, Dr. Caffaro, a co-author of "Sibling Abuse Trauma," said abuse was most often determined by a combination of disengaged upbringing by parents, testosterone and family demographics. It occurs most often in large families composed entirely of closely spaced boys, and least frequently among pairs of sisters, he said.
"A kid can hit a sibling once and it can look pretty bad, but that's not what we consider abuse," he said. "We're looking for a repeated pattern and when that happens, somebody — a parent — has got to be out to lunch."
Abuse occurs most frequently, he said, when a parent is emotionally absent as a result of divorce, long working hours, extensive business travel, alcoholism, preoccupation with his or her own problems or other factors. "One or both parents aren't really around much to do their jobs. It's almost a given," Dr. Caffaro said, adding that "peripheral" fathers are particularly problematic.
"Things are chaotic, boundaries are blurred, and supervision is minimal," he said, noting that those families do not always look chaotic from the outside.
"Sometimes the father is just basically extensively out of town for business and Mom is not a good limit-setter," he said.
In other cases, he added, parents escalate conflicts by playing favorites, ignoring obvious victimization, intervening only to shut the kids up or blaming older children without understanding how younger children helped provoke them. http://www.a-better-child.org/page/873183
Excellent source is SAFE Heres a snip and the link...
Back to the SAFE webpage
“All kids fight.” “You have to expect some sibling rivalry that ends up in some punches-it’s normal.” “Boys will be boys.” “Girls argue, boys get physical.” “Brothers and sisters fight, you have to accept that.”
These kinds of sentiments are commonly expressed about families. Often however, disputes between siblings explode into sustained, severely injurious and even deadly abuse.
Findings from the National Family Violence Survey, funded by the National Institute of Mental Health and summarized in the book Behind Closed Doors-Violence in the American Family (Straus, Gelles, Steinmetz, Anchor Press/Doubleday, 1980), illustrate that sibling violence is not always just a matter of some heated words and a few punches:
At least once a year;
• 42% of all children kicked, bit, or punched a sibling.
• 40% hit with an object.
• 16 % beat up another.
• 0.8% threatened with a knife or gun.
• 0.3% used a knife or gun.
http://www.safe4all.org/
Sibling abuse, including sibling sexual abuse, commonly known as sibling incest, is more prevalent than most people would like to believe. In fact, it is probably the most accepted, and ignored, form of domestic violence.
According to Dr. Vernon Wiehe, professor of social work at the University of Kentucky and author ofPerilous Rivalry: When Siblings Become Abusive, '...as many as 53 out of every 100 children abuse a brother or sister, higher than the percentage of adults who abuse their children or their spouse. What some kids do to their brother or sister inside the family would be called assault outside the family'.
Because of the relationship of perpetrator and victim the abuse is rarely acknowledged or understood within the family. It is often hidden or minimized outside the family. 'Boys will be boys' or 'siblings fight' are often heard phrases which minimize the activity, and the damage caused by such behaviors.
Perpetrators are frequently protected by parents and other family members. This protection shields them from dealing with the consequences of their actions. The victim is also not given the help that they need in order to deal with the effects of the abuse. http://www.sasian.org/
Matthew Jonathan Melton, II was born on April 16th, 2003. He was born eight weeks early via emergency C-section because his mom had pre-eclampsia. He spent two weeks in the neonatal ICU because he was only 3 pounds 14 ounces.
On May 17th, 2003, Matthew sustained bilateral skull fractures and a broken rib as a result of sibling assault/abuse. The doctor’s told us that if he lived, he would be in a vegetative state. They also said that he would never walk or talk. He spent two weeks in the hospital with 1 ½ weeks being on life support.
Myself and Matthew's Dad, Matthew, were charged with two felonies and convicted of one, Aggravated Assault by Failure to Protect. We received 6 (six) years probation, which will be up in May of 2010.
Find out more at…. http://siblingabuse.webs.com/matthewsstory.htm
You really need to visit all these sites the last one especially and finish Mathews story.
My next post will be the links to childrens mental Health... Please everyone, do more research on sibling abuse and help to make those around you aware.
Another excellent link/source http://books.google.com/books?id=ai...iolence&source=bl&ots=93xYypiEI2&sig=NMIiWBBn
