GUILTY FL - Dima Tower, 22, charged for murdering his 2 adoptive parents, North Port, 9 Sept 2023

[whitelilac]

I wonder
if his rage towards adoptive parents
was, in fact, directed at bio parents?

Isn't it called "Transference" in psychology?

Transference
is the unconscious redirection of feelings and emotions from a past relationship
(like a parent or caregiver)
onto a new person.

And, in this tragic case,
onto the adoptive parents.



Isn't this phenomenon seen in acts of some serial killers too?
When each new victim
is the same one from the killer's past.
Murdered again and again.



Well,
this case is for psychiatrists to ponder upon.

JMO

This is very possible.

Also what @Megnut above said "... but it's not hard to imagine he came into this adoption telling himself he wasn't wanted -- by anyone -- and then proceeded to prove it, by being impossible to love. "

All the more reason that he should have been thoroughly evaluated by a psychiatrist, and that psychiatrist should have testified and outlined his/her findings during the trial.

 

[Cryptic]

I think that is a good question and wonder if his defense even considered use of a professional translator during the trial.

He maybe more fluent in advanced English than Ukrainian or Russian.

Unless he was making an effort to keep up with his native language, English could have been his sole language for the last 10 years. One can forget a lot- especially advanced vocabulary, advanced verb conjugations etc.

For example, my Colombian friend- born in Columbia, but family steadily went English only after immigrating when he was 9.

He can handle direct conversations about subjects he is familiar with in Spanish. But he also readily admits that advanced vocabulary, subject specific words and complex verb changes like: If you saw him do “X”, what would you have done? Are far beyond him now.

 

[Chimera]

I am still mystified that he did not have a real defense. In pretrial motions was it ruled that no discussion of his life leading up to these murders was allowed? What about testing psychological and other? Was anything presented. WAS FAS brought up. I feel I missed a lot but only thing I saw from defense was him on the stand and not being helped by his attorney at all.

Bbm.
Agreed, and I think all of this ^^^ comment is important.

Who knows what his life was like before being adopted ?
Was there trauma/abuse at the orphanage ?
Please know I'm not excusing his actions.

Would he have been listened to prior to the murders if he requested to be placed into foster care ?
I'm betting a social worker could have had Dimas removed immediately IF he stated he was going to commit a violent act against Robbie and Jennifer; he would not have just been left there !

Also wondering if he occasionally lived away from the adoptive parents, where was he staying then ?

Still many questions ... but I think this was preventable and that's so horrendously tragic.
Imo.

 

[nao]

He maybe more fluent in advanced English than Ukrainian or Russian.

Unless he was making an effort to keep up with his native language, English could have been his sole language for the last 10 years. One can forget a lot- especially advanced vocabulary, advanced verb conjugations etc.

For example, my Colombian friend- born in Columbia, but family steadily went English only after immigrating when he was 9.

He can handle direct conversations about subjects he is familiar with in Spanish. But he also readily admits that advanced vocabulary, subject specific words and complex verb changes like: If you saw him do “X”, what would you have done? Are far beyond him now.

Moo..he was 14 years old. Sounds like life went sideways soon after he arrived. He has no bio parents and then his culture, language, friends and country of origin was taken from him. His identity. He was not a young child who could adapt....moo

 

[Dotta]

Bbm.
Agreed, and I think all of this ^^^ comment is important.

Who knows what his life was like before being adopted ?
Was there trauma/abuse at the orphanage ?
Please know I'm not excusing his actions.

Would he have been listened to prior to the murders if he requested to be placed into foster care ?
I'm betting a social worker could have had Dimas removed immediately IF he stated he was going to commit a violent act against Robbie and Jennifer; he would not have just been left there !

Also wondering if he occasionally lived away from the adoptive parents, where was he staying then ?

Still many questions ... but I think this was preventable and that's so horrendously tragic.
Imo.

As far as I remember
he ran away from adoptive family once or twice, but was brought back.

Also,
he was sent to adoptive parents' relatives for some time after arguments.

Quote:

"Police had been called to the home years before the double slayings because Tower allegedly attacked his adoptive parents.

In one case,
Tower allegedly assaulted his father and was sent to live with relatives on his mother’s side for a short time
before Robbie Tower brought him back home."

Ukrainian adoptee Dima Tower breaks down in court as he’s accused of slaughtering ‘caring’ American parents

A Ukrainian adoptee wept in court as his lawyer detailed his troubled life before he allegedly slaughtered his “caring” American parents.

nypost.com

"He told police he felt like a
'nobody coming from nowhere',
being picked up by two strangers
and brought to a new country
thousands of miles away from his homeland.

He claimed his parents fought about him all the time,
his mother cared more for him than his father did,
and his father blamed him for ruining their marriage.

'I’m not a good kid',
Tower told detectives.
'I was telling you,
I wasn’t raised right,
and I’ve been misbehaving
and not listening and not doing what I’m told'.”

https://eu.heraldtribune.com/story/news/crime/2025/11/14/dima-tower-case-trial-murder-parents-north-port-florida/87250748007/

"Court information reveals
Dima had been accused of assault on a previous occasion.

'He was arrested in 2020 on charges including domestic violence
after he allegedly threw the victim across the kitchen as he was putting groceries in the fridge',
according to an earlier affidavit.

The alleged attack left the victim with a bleeding forehead and lacerations to the back.

The charges were later declined by a judge,
court records show."

Adoptive Son on Trial After Mom and Dad Massacred, Bodies Found 'Head-to-Head' in Bloodied Home

Dima Tower has been charged with first-degree murder in connection with his adoptive parents' brutal slaying

people.com

 

[Charlot123]

We lack context.

I think we can all agree it could be impossibly difficult to raise a child at 14 who had lived whatever past Dima lived... fuessing normal parenting doesn't always work.

I'm thinking of children who carry forward food hoarding, even though their new life provides trustworthy access to abundant food.

If Dima and Robbie butted heads (would hardly be surprising), perhaps Jennifer tried to intervene, redirect, etc. A little bit of good cop. Telling him his adoptive father didn't want a boy (and by extension, this boy) would hardly foster closeness, but maybe that's not HOW it was presented. Maybe she told him how Robbie was on board to adopt a girl, didn't want a boy, but agreed to adopt this boy to show just how great his commitment was, in adopting a son. That would be a very complex concept.

I don't know what capacity Dima has to emote, understand enotions -- his or others' -- but it's not hard to imagine he came into this adoption telling himself he wasn't wanted -- by anyone -- and then proceeded to prove it, by being impossible to love.

His Defense made a strategic decision not to have him evaluated.

At first blush, that seems short-sighted. His past and his mental health may have struck a sympathetic chord with a juror -- so maybe his attorney felt that an eval would actually do the opposite, remove all sympathy. Perhaps there's a lot of not-attractive diagnoses in his file and both sides stipulated to leaving it there. A door the Defense didn't want to open and the State didn't need open.

JMO

You know why I think this Defense is bad?

The defense attorney uses long phrases, hints and innuendos in his speech. He probably considers himself a great orator and we surely understand where he drives at, but does Dima understand him? Dima is a concrete thinker. The instructions from the defense have to be concrete. I doubt that Dima could understand this guy. It is not about the translator.

The Defense has to be much more straightforward. “This is what you say, this is what you don’t say, this is our best bet, this is what happens in the worst case”.

I don’t think that revealing any diagnosis can make the situation worse, tbh.

My personal question as the community member:

- with the diagnoses that Dima has, is it possible that existing treatment modalities can ever lower his threat to the community?

- Can we take a risk to ever let him out, if he is treated and complies with the treatment, or is it hopeless?

But for this, we need to know exactly what he suffers from. “Locking him up and throwing away the key” is not significantly decreasing the level of danger in any community as there are other people with unexplained rage walking around, also undiagnosed.

There are enough nonadopted people around us who suffer from uncontrollable rage. Or have poorly understood homicidal urges. We need to make them safe and functional.

Dima’s orphanage surely made it worse, as some articles indicate that he was bruised and hungry when taken out by the Towers pre-adoption.

However, in this case, I’d say, at least 85% is biology. JMO. What we don’t know is specifically what biology means, in Dima’s case. So why not get a comprehensive answer?

We are discussing whether Dima could have FAS. It is only an assumption. Of interest, FAS itself is more common in people with certain genotypes. Other genotypes can be protective for fetuses subjected to maternal drinking. Lastly, alcohol and acetaldehyde cause certain epidenetic changes. What kind of changes are we talking about?

Here is an article covering these issues.

Genetic Influences on Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder - PMC

Fetal alcohol spectrum disorder (FASD) encompasses the range of deleterious outcomes of prenatal alcohol exposure (PAE) in the affected offspring, including developmental delay, intellectual disability, attention deficits, and conduct disorders. ...

pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

Shouldn’t we be interested in the best way to diagnose FAS? Or what could be the best way to help all children with FAS? How can we find it out?

They didn’t even do all required studied for the court in Dima’s case. Or perhaps Dima suffers from a very different condition?

P.S. BTW, I think he does or rather, it is not only FAS but it is personal feeling. Some genetic conditions were found to be exceptionally common. What if Dima has something frequently met? Don’t other kids need help?

 

[Charlot123]

As far as I remember
he ran away from adoptive family once or twice, but was brought back.

Also,
he was sent to adoptive parents' relatives for some time after arguments.

Quote:

"Police had been called to the home years before the double slayings because Tower allegedly attacked his adoptive parents.

In one case,
Tower allegedly assaulted his father and was sent to live with relatives on his mother’s side for a short time
before Robbie Tower brought him back home."

Ukrainian adoptee Dima Tower breaks down in court as he’s accused of slaughtering ‘caring’ American parents

A Ukrainian adoptee wept in court as his lawyer detailed his troubled life before he allegedly slaughtered his “caring” American parents.

nypost.com

"He told police he felt like a
'nobody coming from nowhere',
being picked up by two strangers
and brought to a new country
thousands of miles away from his homeland.

He claimed his parents fought about him all the time,
his mother cared more for him than his father did,
and his father blamed him for ruining their marriage.

'I’m not a good kid',
Tower told detectives.
'I was telling you,
I wasn’t raised right,
and I’ve been misbehaving
and not listening and not doing what I’m told'.”

https://eu.heraldtribune.com/story/news/crime/2025/11/14/dima-tower-case-trial-murder-parents-north-port-florida/87250748007/

"Court information reveals
Dima had been accused of assault on a previous occasion.

'He was arrested in 2020 on charges including domestic violence
after he allegedly threw the victim across the kitchen as he was putting groceries in the fridge',
according to an earlier affidavit.

The alleged attack left the victim with a bleeding forehead and lacerations to the back.

The charges were later declined by a judge,
court records show."

Adoptive Son on Trial After Mom and Dad Massacred, Bodies Found 'Head-to-Head' in Bloodied Home

Dima Tower has been charged with first-degree murder in connection with his adoptive parents' brutal slaying

people.com

It doesn’t make the adoptive parents guilty. If the dad had to lock the door to his room before going to bed, surely he could say “you ruined our marriage”. Think of what sleepless nights do to us.

My question is, was Dima ever shown to a psychiatrist? A neurologist? What did his pediatrician think? What was the diagnosis? Was he prescribed medications? Did he take them? Or was he manipulating the parents each time? They lived in a well-off community and had many years to deal with his obvious issues.

 

[Dotta]

It doesn’t make the adoptive parents guilty. If the dad had to lock the door to his room before going to bed, surely he could say “you ruined our marriage”. Think of what sleepless nights do to us.

My question is, was Dima ever shown to a psychiatrist? A neurologist? What did his pediatrician think? What was the diagnosis? Was he prescribed medications? Did he take them? Or was he manipulating the parents each time? They lived in a well-off community and had many years to deal with his obvious issues.

I never said that "something make adoptive parents guilty".

Never, ever!!!!!

I hope this is clear.

They are victims of mentally disturbed adoptive son.
These people took him to their home,
cared for him and loved him.

But, in response, this individual made their lives hell.
And, eventually, murdered them in cold blood.

I don't think he can be resocialized.
His place is in prison to the end of his life.

Kept away from civilized society.

JMO

 

[Charlot123]

Bbm.
Agreed, and I think all of this ^^^ comment is important.

Who knows what his life was like before being adopted ?
Was there trauma/abuse at the orphanage ?
Please know I'm not excusing his actions.

Would he have been listened to prior to the murders if he requested to be placed into foster care ?
I'm betting a social worker could have had Dimas removed immediately IF he stated he was going to commit a violent act against Robbie and Jennifer; he would not have just been left there !

Also wondering if he occasionally lived away from the adoptive parents, where was he staying then ?

Still many questions ... but I think this was preventable and that's so horrendously tragic.
Imo.

@Chimera, we don’t even know what part of Ukraine he is from and what was his mother tongue. Surely they can trace back his family history. Medical, psychiatric, behavioral. Also: people have very different past memory. My earliest memory dates back to 10 months of age. My older son remembers himself at one year of age. (But he poorly remembers my mom who was the most important person in his life till he was six because at six he moved here.) I wonder, what if Dima has poor memory of his life in Ukraine? This is why he says, no one from nowhere. Memory is usually linked to speech development and is discreet.

 

[Charlot123]

I never said that "something make adoptive parents guilty".

Never, ever!!!!!

I hope this is clear.

They are victims of mentally disturbed adoptive son.
These people took him to their home,
cared for him and loved him.

But, in response, this individual made their lives hell.
And, eventually, murdered them in cold blood.

I don't think he can be rehabilitated.
His place is in prison to the end of his life.

Kept away from civilized society.

JMO

@Dotta, I know that you don’t blame them. My answer was in response to the Internet community outside of the Websleuths. (Some people ask very strange questions about the adoptive family, really!).

But I am always about prevention, you know. I would never think of calling Dima “evil”, but he is a horrible danger to the society, so from this standpoint, “life” for today is the answer.

But it is a sad answer and it is a burden on the society, and mostly, it does not prevent other tragedies!

I always think, is there any time/actions that make such stories preventable? Kohberger is another big question to me, for example.

 

[Dotta]

@Dotta, I know that you don’t blame them. My answer was in response to the Internet community outside of the Websleuths. (Some people ask very strange questions about the adoptive family, really!).

But I am always about prevention, you know. I would never think of calling Dima “evil”, but he is a horrible danger to the society, so from this standpoint, “life” for today is the answer.

But it is a sad answer and it is a burden on the society, and mostly, it does not prevent other tragedies!

I always think, is there any time/actions that make such stories preventable? Kohberger is another big question to me, for example.

I wonder if DT had drinking problem.
It was reported he drank alcohol before the attack.
In fact,
it was mentioned in his testimony on the stand during the trial.

Mixing alcohol and his obvious issues proved lethal.

JMO

 

[Serononin]

I wonder if DT had drinking problem.
It was reported he drank alcohol before the attack.
In fact, it was mentioned in his testimony during the trial.

Certainly possible, especially since IIRC his biological father was an alcoholic, and predisposition to substance misuse can be hereditary

 

[Charlot123]

I wonder if DT had drinking problem.
It was reported he drank alcohol before the attack.
In fact,
it was mentioned in his testimony on the stand during the trial.

Mixing alcohol and his obvious issues proved lethal.

JMO

I am surprised that the parents bought him a car. I would be afraid of responsibility in their shoes given his anger/impulsivity. But, it means he could pass both theoretical and driving exams. It would be interesting to know how his driving was.

Perhaps they bought him a car because he got a job? It would be interesting to know how he performed.

Also, if he was kicked out of school in 10th grade, did he graduate through a local college?

 

[Dotta]

This case is horrific
because it touches the sensitive issue
of domestic abuse of parents by children.

The cases of parents or grandparents terrorized, abused or even murdered
by their children/grandchildren
(teen or adult)
seem still not exposed enough.

As if it is too embarrassing to talk about.
And victims often suffer in silence,
unwilling to report the abuse.



JMO

 

[turaj]

There is expressive language and receptive language and they can be at variance

His receptive language might be poor, but it is missed because he can “express himself”

BTW, the problem might exist in any language; I suspect that his language comprehension is poor in any language. I also think that if the judge gave him the chance to speak, it would be very obvious.

Here: I think that because he is such a risk to the society, he must be kept in prison. It is not only the issue of punishment but also, how do we protect ourselves from him?

However, since we don’t know what causes such unrestrained anger and what could help, all possible tests need to be done.

It seems. like that testing should have been done in advance of the trial. He could well have a receptive language issue or lots of learning disabilities but. that was the job of his attorney to request accommodations.

 

[turaj]

IF this is true, RT did not want to adopt, then was okay with the idea of adopting a daughter, then finally agreed to a son, wouldn't that have doomed the adoption from the start? Why adopt if both parents aren't 100% sure? The child will be able to tell. I hope it's not true. JMO.

Do we know much about the adoption process...was it a church based agency or what. There are a myriad of interviews and testing of potential adoptive parents. A good facilitator should have been able to sort that issue of the father early on....but no process is perfect. Again so much we don't know.

 

[turaj]

We lack context.

I think we can all agree it could be impossibly difficult to raise a child at 14 who had lived whatever past Dima lived... fuessing normal parenting doesn't always work.

I'm thinking of children who carry forward food hoarding, even though their new life provides trustworthy access to abundant food.

If Dima and Robbie butted heads (would hardly be surprising), perhaps Jennifer tried to intervene, redirect, etc. A little bit of good cop. Telling him his adoptive father didn't want a boy (and by extension, this boy) would hardly foster closeness, but maybe that's not HOW it was presented. Maybe she told him how Robbie was on board to adopt a girl, didn't want a boy, but agreed to adopt this boy to show just how great his commitment was, in adopting a son. That would be a very complex concept.

I don't know what capacity Dima has to emote, understand enotions -- his or others' -- but it's not hard to imagine he came into this adoption telling himself he wasn't wanted -- by anyone -- and then proceeded to prove it, by being impossible to love.

His Defense made a strategic decision not to have him evaluated.

At first blush, that seems short-sighted. His past and his mental health may have struck a sympathetic chord with a juror -- so maybe his attorney felt that an eval would actually do the opposite, remove all sympathy. Perhaps there's a lot of not-attractive diagnoses in his file and both sides stipulated to leaving it there. A door the Defense didn't want to open and the State didn't need open.

JMO

"His Defense made a strategic decision not to have him evaluated." Wow I find that extraordinary and another reason that I think he has a case for ineffective counsel.

 

[Megnut]

"His Defense made a strategic decision not to have him evaluated." Wow I find that extraordinary and another reason that I think he has a case for ineffective counsel.

That is only my speculation.

Because that was really his only (possible) defense -- some sort of mental defect -- I do wonder why he wasn't evaluated, or if he was, why it didn't factor in the trial.

It would appear the defense didn't intend to put on a defense, probably did everything to discourage him from taking the stand (for fear it would go exactly as it did).

Really sad case, all around.

JMO

 

[whitelilac]

If he wants to appeal, how would that work. Would the court assign a new attorney?
Does he even understand that he can appeal?

 

[turaj]

It doesn’t make the adoptive parents guilty. If the dad had to lock the door to his room before going to bed, surely he could say “you ruined our marriage”. Think of what sleepless nights do to us.

My question is, was Dima ever shown to a psychiatrist? A neurologist? What did his pediatrician think? What was the diagnosis? Was he prescribed medications? Did he take them? Or was he manipulating the parents each time? They lived in a well-off community and had many years to deal with his obvious issues.

my daughter came from Latin America. She looked different from most in our community but we sought out adoptive groups and she met many others from her country. It helped. While the adoptees from Russia at that time and now Ukraine don't stand out physically, mentally they are different. I wonder if any attempts were made to find such groups?