GUILTY MI - Tara Grant, 34, slain, dismembered, Washington Twp, 9 Feb 2007

[concernedperson]

Fran, I imagine the au pair was afraid and wanted to get to safety. If she thought him creepy and was worried about harm being done to her or if her family said "get the heck out of Dodge" she would do so.

She could not have prevented this as most au pairs are very silent or discreet in home environments. They are taught to be so as it effects future employment. It is hard enough for seasoned professionals to gauge when is the appropriate time to intervene much less a household employee.

Just trying to be fair with her. Even Taras sister defended Grant at the beginning.

 

[chicoliving]

Was the au pair interviewed by LE??

 

[Autumn2004]

Alicia Standerfer and her husband's family are friends of ours. I have known the standerfer's since I was a baby. Alicia is a very sweet kind hearted person. Their family has been through so much. Her dad had health problems and she quit work to help take care of him with two little children. Her family grew up in escanaba, a very leave it to beaver town. Obviously everyone is devastated and cant wrap their mind around it. You feel like this only happens to *other people*. I only met tara and her husband once at alicia and eric's wedding. They seemed very normal but obviously you never know.

Alicia's parents are older and her dad is disabled and the mom cant take care of him by herself. This family has been through so much over the last few years it breaks my heart. The kids will be very well taken care of with alicia and her mom and dad. They grew up in a very good stable home.

 

[concernedperson]

Alisha Standerfer and her husband's family are friends of ours. I have known the standerfer's since I was a baby. Alisha is a very sweet kind hearted person. Their family has been through so much. Her dad had health problems and she quit work to help take care of him with two little children. Her family grew up in escanaba, a very leave it to beaver town. Obviously everyone is devastated and cant wrap their mind around it. You feel like this only happens to *other people*. I only met tara and her husband once at alisha and eric's wedding. They seemed very normal but obviously you never know.

Alisha's parents are older and her dad is disabled and the mom cant take care of him by herself. This family has been through so much over the last few years it breaks my heart. The kids will be very well taken care of with alisha and her mom and dad. They grew up in a very good stable home.

In any situation this would be devastating. Give the circumstances it is beyond that. Prayers for this family and for you as you help them overcome some of the difficulties.

 

[Autumn2004]

Thanks

Unfortunately we arent around eric and alicia much since they moved out of michigan but we do see eric's family quite often.

 

[nanandjim]

...I wonder if he did have problems with his role as Mr. Mom...

I think that Tara's success constantly reminded him of what a failure he was. He was jealous of her. She had what it took to be a success. He was a college dropout working for his father. She was beautiful and smart and wouldn't have missed a beat if they divorced. He knew that. That's why he murdered her. He couldn't stand it. Well, now the whole world can see what a real loser this guy truly is. I hope that he rots in prison for the rest of his life. I also do not want his side of the family to have the children. So, I hope that her side fights for custody.

 

[Autumn2004]

nanandjim- they do hope to get custody.

Geez i made spelling errors on her name, I have no clue why must be lack of sleep.

 

[Jess]

http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070305/NEWS04/70305050


A hearing is to be held at 3 p.m. to determine whether the petition will be authorized, according to a county official familiar with the plan. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because the official is not authorized to speak about the Grant case.


After spending three nights with their father's sister and brother-in-law, the Grant children -- a 6-year-old girl and 4-year-old boy -- were picked up late Monday by Tara Grant's sister, Alicia Standerfer, 32, of Ohio.

The children were bundled in winter clothes in the backseat of Standerfer's car. A reporter could see Standerfer, whose husband was driving, turn around to speak to the children, who peered out the car's rear windows as they drove away.

The car was escorted out of the subdivision by Sterling Heights police.

 

[englishleigh]

nanandjim- they do hope to get custody.

Geez i made spelling errors on her name, I have no clue why must be lack of sleep.

Autumn, please pass along our prayers and condolences to Alicia and her family.
This is so very sad. I know Alicia would be a wonderful "second mom" to those kids, she looks so much like Tara...she will be a great comfort to them. :blowkiss:

 

[Autumn2004]

Thank you

They do look very much alike. They are a beautiful family. The grandparents live with eric and alicia so hopefully it will be an easier transition for the kids being able to be around their aunt, uncle, cousins and grandparents in the same house if they are able to have custody of the kids.

 

[fran]

Fran, I imagine the au pair was afraid and wanted to get to safety. If she thought him creepy and was worried about harm being done to her or if her family said "get the heck out of Dodge" she would do so.

She could not have prevented this as most au pairs are very silent or discreet in home environments. They are taught to be so as it effects future employment. It is hard enough for seasoned professionals to gauge when is the appropriate time to intervene much less a household employee.

Just trying to be fair with her. Even Taras sister defended Grant at the beginning.

concernedperson:

I'm sure you are absolutely right, this au pair was in between a rock and a hard place. Dam#d if you do and dam#d if you don't. I take what I said back as being too harsh. She wasn't responsible for what happened to Tara, Stephen was.

According to the au pair, he played a role when she returned that night, she had no idea of the horror that had happened while she was away. To be honest, she's lucky she got out of there when she did.

I know that Tara's sister supported Grant in the beginning. It's sad, just like with Scott Peterson, to see the family of the victim sure the loving husband was the love of their daughter's life, only to find out that he was not who he pretended to be.

I personally know how it feels to have a child's 'true love' turn out to be completely opposite of what they pretended to be. It's heartbreaking and makes you angry at the same time. Fortunately with my daughter, she found out about the creep before it went any further than it did, she didn't marry him and is all the wiser.

You're right that the au pair couldn't have prevented what happened that night. It was already done by the time she came home. Thank God she didn't return in the middle of his tirade. She might have been missing too. I bet she looks for a new line of work. I know, I would.

JMHO
fran

 

[fran]

Thank you

They do look very much alike. They are a beautiful family. The grandparents live with eric and alicia so hopefully it will be an easier transition for the kids being able to be around their aunt, uncle, cousins and grandparents in the same house if they are able to have custody of the kids.

Autumn:

I'm sure this is very difficult for you, knowing the family and this horrific crime touching their lives. Thank you for speaking up. You can tell your heart is in the right place. I just hope you're ok.

I know (first hand) even being acquainted from a distance to someone related to a notorious or horrific crime such as this, can make you feel ................so much more connected than say we........here on WS, ............looking from the outside in.

Many of us didn't hear about the disappearance of Tara until the story broke on national tv. We stood back, hoping LE would do the right thing. Many of us who've been here for some time, have seen this happen, over and over and over,............we know the drill, what to look for, and we call them our 'hinky meters' go off.

This case was no different for many of us. But you are connected, which makes it so much harder to bare. Although we like having you here and your input, if it becomes too unbareable, stop reading here and any websites talking about the case. Doing that could save you much unnecessary heartache.

I know that just about every single MSM report I've seen today has mentioned this case. So, everybody, IMHO, that pays any attention to the news knows about this henious crime. But please, please, let the family know, there are really many people out here who see their pain, almost physically feel it ourselves, and our sincere condolences go out to them. They are truly in many of our prayers tonite.

Take care Autmn, Tara is in a better place. She's watching over her little ones. That's why her sister and BIL were able to drive away with them tonite. They'll see to it that Tara is not forgotten and Tara's parents will see their daughter's life continue thru her children.

Sincerely,
fran

 

[fran]

Was the au pair interviewed by LE??

To be honest, chico, I don't know if she was 'interviewed by LE;' however, since she was living at the home at the time, I guess I assumed she was.

I did see an article in the paper where she gave her account of the night, where she returned home about midnight (I think?) and Grant came walking down the stairs, 'pretending' he thought it was Tara saying something like, "What did you forget," or something like that. I know I could look it up and give you an exact quote, but honestly, LOL, it's too late and I'm too lazy.
But, IF I recall correctly it was something like that.

Now that I think about it, I originally heard that the au pair left because the wife was gone and this was the MO for the au pairs or whatever. In reality, IMHO, I think she was 'creeped out' and decided 'I do not want to be here anymore!' and left.

The truth will probably come out later. But at least the ONLY victim was Tara. It could have included the au pair, had she caught him in the act, or the kids too. Who knows? I did hear the kids were in the house at the time he murdered his wife. Since she had defensive wounds and their was blunt force trauma to the head and she was manually strangled, their must have been one heck of a fight before she finally succumed.

Oh my gosh! I can't talk about this case anymore tonite. It's way too disturbing.

I'm glad he was at least caught!

JMHO
fran

 

[Autumn2004]

Thanks Fran

It is hard and heartbreaking. I probably wont be online for awhile honestly I havent turned on the news or cnn since this begun. We do not get the local paper and Im trying to have my head in the sand. I know we will have to deal with it soon with the service though. Going through this has been very surreal and you feel decieved as to who you thought someone was. I cant imagine how deceived they are feeling. Honestly I dont even know what to say to them but Im so sorry and it doesnt even touch how I feel about it.

 

[chicoliving]

To be honest, chico, I don't know if she was 'interviewed by LE;' however, since she was living at the home at the time, I guess I assumed she was.

I did see an article in the paper where she gave her account of the night, where she returned home about midnight (I think?) and Grant came walking down the stairs, 'pretending' he thought it was Tara saying something like, "What did you forget," or something like that. I know I could look it up and give you an exact quote, but honestly, LOL, it's too late and I'm too lazy.
But, IF I recall correctly it was something like that.

Now that I think about it, I originally heard that the au pair left because the wife was gone and this was the MO for the au pairs or whatever. In reality, IMHO, I think she was 'creeped out' and decided 'I do not want to be here anymore!' and left.

The truth will probably come out later. But at least the ONLY victim was Tara. It could have included the au pair, had she caught him in the act, or the kids too. Who knows? I did hear the kids were in the house at the time he murdered his wife. Since she had defensive wounds and their was blunt force trauma to the head and she was manually strangled, their must have been one heck of a fight before she finally succumed.

Oh my gosh! I can't talk about this case anymore tonite. It's way too disturbing.

I'm glad he was at least caught!

JMHO
fran

Thanks fran! Yes, thankfully he's caught and most likely never to step foot a free man.

Something the sheriff said tonight makes me think that IF the au pair spoke with LE it was independent of SG. The sheriff sounded like they welcomed the interviews that SG did with the media because those statements/comments weren't matching up with what he had told LE. That was my impression not necessarily the words the sheriff used. The ole "give 'em enough rope" adage. I think LE had more than just a baggie with gloves, presence of blood and the metal shavings to obtain that SW. Inconsistent statements would add into that I would think.

 

[chicoliving]

Ahhh the pieces are falling into place....as far as probable cause, imo.

Investigators believe Stephen Grant dismembered his wife at his family's tool and dye shop in Mount Clemens. A man who works nearby gave police what could be some very valuable information.

http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/myfox/pages/Home/Detail?contentId=2581900&version=3&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=VSTY&pageId=1.1.1

 

[sleuthin4fun]

My thought was that if I was Tara's sister there would be no wasy on earth that I would let anyone in SG family have my sisters children!!!! I realize that they didn't commit the act but, I just would never let it happen. Also, if I was SG sister I don't think I could even fight Tara's family for custody. This is too sad!!!!

http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070305/NEWS04/70305050


A hearing is to be held at 3 p.m. to determine whether the petition will be authorized, according to a county official familiar with the plan. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because the official is not authorized to speak about the Grant case.


After spending three nights with their father's sister and brother-in-law, the Grant children -- a 6-year-old girl and 4-year-old boy -- were picked up late Monday by Tara Grant's sister, Alicia Standerfer, 32, of Ohio.

The children were bundled in winter clothes in the backseat of Standerfer's car. A reporter could see Standerfer, whose husband was driving, turn around to speak to the children, who peered out the car's rear windows as they drove away.

The car was escorted out of the subdivision by Sterling Heights police.

 

[angelwngs]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jess
http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/...NEWS04/70305050


A hearing is to be held at 3 p.m. to determine whether the petition will be authorized, according to a county official familiar with the plan. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because the official is not authorized to speak about the Grant case.


After spending three nights with their father's sister and brother-in-law, the Grant children -- a 6-year-old girl and 4-year-old boy -- were picked up late Monday by Tara Grant's sister, Alicia Standerfer, 32, of Ohio.

The children were bundled in winter clothes in the backseat of Standerfer's car. A reporter could see Standerfer, whose husband was driving, turn around to speak to the children, who peered out the car's rear windows as they drove away.

The car was escorted out of the subdivision by Sterling Heights police.


~~~
If this goes to trial they should read this in court......as part of closing arguments.

 

[fran]

The ripple effects of a crime such as this is unbelieveable. It works from the victim AND the perp out. Just as Tara's family is heartbroken and horrified over what happened to their daughter/sister, I'm sure that Stephen's family is just as mortified and shocked that their son/brother could do such a dispicable thing to his wife and mother of his children. The Grant family probably never saw this coming.

I know that Tara's family was going to file for custody of the children, but the fact that Stephen's sister willingly gave the kids to his family yesterday tells me she's trying to do the right thing. In all sincerity, I feel for them just as much as I do Tara's family. They're probably in some way blaming themselves for some of this carnage, think just maybe there could have been some way they could have prevented this tragedy.

Stephen's family will now be branded in the community where they have lived and prospered for so many years. They will be shunned by many people, even some of what they thought were their friends. Some in the community will also most likely feel the same disgust for their entire family as they do the perp,.........it would be something like 'guilt by association.'

When Stephen chose to take this road and murder his wife and everything since, he not only broke the heart of and destroyed the innocence of Tara's family, but his own mom and dad, sister and BIL, nephews and nieces, and cousins and aunts and uncles. Anyone with any connection to him through name or blood, will doubtless personally feel the effects of this crime for years to come.

Divorce would have been so much easier and acceptable. When are these sociopathic husbands going to realize that? When are they going to realize that when they kill their wives, they destroy their children and EVERYONE else related to them in any way.

There will be no winners here. There's no way to take back what SG did, to restore life for this entire family back to what it was. Now they'll just have to deal with what he left in his wake. It could take years, if EVER, for all involved to resume some form of normalcy to their lives.

Again, my condolences to Tara's entire family, and sympathy to SG's FAMILY for what they're going to have to endure with for the months to come. They didn't ask for this, just like Tara didn't.

JMHO
fran

 

[Hopeful One]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jess
http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/...NEWS04/70305050


A hearing is to be held at 3 p.m. to determine whether the petition will be authorized, according to a county official familiar with the plan. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because the official is not authorized to speak about the Grant case.


After spending three nights with their father's sister and brother-in-law, the Grant children -- a 6-year-old girl and 4-year-old boy -- were picked up late Monday by Tara Grant's sister, Alicia Standerfer, 32, of Ohio.

The children were bundled in winter clothes in the backseat of Standerfer's car. A reporter could see Standerfer, whose husband was driving, turn around to speak to the children, who peered out the car's rear windows as they drove away.

The car was escorted out of the subdivision by Sterling Heights police.


~~~
If this goes to trial they should read this in court......as part of closing arguments.

That absolutely breaks my heart.