MO - Elizabeth Olten, 9, St Martin's, 21 Oct 2009 #5

[crimecurious]

Hell, I was sneaky as they come. Well, obviously I'm not because my 16yo has way outdone me... in a bad way.

 

[CementPond]

Yes, this is true. I think when people like myself self ask the question "Where are/were the parents?", we are not speaking of the ones who are involved who's kids sneak and do things behind their back. Nor are we speaking of the hard working parents who can't be there 24/7 with their kids.

I know when I say that I am referring to the parents who choose drugs, for example, over their kids. Or ones who think that dating and hanging out in bars is more important than being home and helping their kids with their homework and everything else they should be doing.

Yes, you can have a parent who is totally involved and home full time and yet their kid can still end up having problems. But, you gotta agree, more often than not the kids who turn out like AB do NOT have parents like that. Sorry if I'm not explaining myself well. But, I think you'll understand what I mean.

Kids can be sneaky as hell. Not everything that goes wrong can be blamed on parents. I have first hand knowlege of that thanks to my brother.

 

[danni]

Yes, this is true. I think when people like myself self ask the question "Where are/were the parents?", we are not speaking of the ones who are involved who's kids sneak and do things behind their back. Nor are we speaking of the hard working parents who can't be there 24/7 with their kids.

I know when I say that I am referring to the parents who choose drugs, for example, over their kids. Or ones who think that dating and hanging out in bars is more important than being home and helping their kids with their homework and everything else they should be doing.

Yes, you can have a parent who is totally involved and home full time and yet their kid can still end up having problems. But, you gotta agree, more often than not the kids who turn out like AB do NOT have parents like that. Sorry if I'm not explaining myself well. But, I think you'll understand what I mean.

Funny you should mention all this. I grew up with a kid, his dad was a preacher, his mom stayed at home, home schooled, went to church twice on sunday, wensday, thursday night they knocked on doors. But let me tell you, friday and saturday night he was the worse one out of our group of friends. If and when we ever got caught in trouble. it was because something stupid he did. He went above and beyond what everyone else did. NOTHING like killing, or hurting anyone or anything physically, emotionally, or anything like that. Ever hear the phrase, "Bad little kid" well that was Colby!! lol

Two brothers that were in our group were the son of the chief of police. The one just got married the other I think just had his first baby. They are 26 and 28 years old, both have been in and out of rehab more times then I can count. One would go in get clean, come out, the other would go in, get clean, before he could get out his brother was using again. this went on for YEARS! They are both clean now.


If your dad being a preacher or a cop can't keep you on the straight and narrow I don't hardely see how the "average joe" can!

 

[*~Aimee~*]

Funny you should mention all this. I grew up with a kid, his dad was a preacher, his mom stayed at home, home schooled, went to church twice on sunday, wensday, thursday night they knocked on doors. But let me tell you, friday and saturday night he was the worse one out of our group of friends. If and when we ever got caught in trouble. it was because something stupid he did. He went above and beyond what everyone else did. NOTHING like killing, or hurting anyone or anything physically, emotionally, or anything like that. Ever hear the phrase, "Bad little kid" well that was Colby!! lol

Two brothers that were in our group were the son of the chief of police. The one just got married the other I think just had his first baby. They are 26 and 28 years old, both have been in and out of rehab more times then I can count. One would go in get clean, come out, the other would go in, get clean, before he could get out his brother was using again. this went on for YEARS! They are both clean now.


If your dad being a preacher or a cop can't keep you on the straight and narrow I don't hardely see how the "average joe" can!

But this is true. I know several preachers kis/cops kids and they can be the worst. LOL Hence - the 80's footloose movie? She was a preachers daughter. I know it ain't bad movie but even when I was growing up that was said.....a preachers daughter can be trouble LOL

And my nephew-in-law by marriage OD'd last year and his father was a policeman. So yep parents can't all keep track. It is sad...just gets worse everyday.​

 

[Absolutely]

You can also do a search in myspace on her ms screen name - that will take you to other people who she is listed as a friend on, or she has posted a comment on. I only get about 33 hits.

All the stuff I'm finding about AB, videos, comments etc are at least a year and a half old....anyone find anything more current like this year....or did she fall off the net so to speak?

 

[CementPond]

LOL How true about the preacher thing.

Back when we were in HS we used to laugh at how us public school kids would get a bad reputation and yet it was a lot of the local Catholic HS girls that we knew who ended up pregnant, on drugs, and big time drinkers. Not that it didn't happen to public school kids too. But, the difference was that everyone treated the Catholic girls like they were saints, good girls, could do no wrong, etc. and treated us the total opposite. lol Funny how things turn out some times.

 

[danni]

Whoa whoa whoa....I worked in the therapeutic foster care business for awhile. I do work in the state of Kentucky so it might be different. But I do know children with behavioral problems in my state are paid by level.

It is WAY different, Missouri has the second LOWEST amounts paid out to forster or guardians in the United States, only second to Nebraska!

In Missouri children with a feeding tube are the highest income level.

What they consider a "traditional" two year old brings about 270.

In this state when they figure child support they take into consideration the bills of the child. This amount has to cover, food, diapers, electric, water, sewage, morgage. The amount that a foster child brings in is not even that of what child support would be on that child.

Foster care is not a BUSINESS. MOST people do it out of the love they have for needy children.

 

[mommy2many]

Whoa whoa whoa....I worked in the therapeutic foster care business for awhile. I do work in the state of Kentucky so it might be different. But I do know children with behavioral problems in my state are paid by level.

i live in ky also and a friend of mine is a foster parent and she gets almost a thousand a month for the child she has. he is 17 and its based on levels he is a level 3 or 4 i forget now. but he gets in a lot of trouble at school.

 

[Padua]

Foster care is not a BUSINESS. MOST people do it out of the love they have for needy children.

No they don't.

 

[Padua]

Let me know when you are a foster parent.

 

[danni]

Let me know when you are a foster parent.

WHEN I become a foster??

How about I tell you how long I have been dealing with the foster system in Missouri. Lets see I am 26 now, almost 27, I started doing respit care at 18, became guardian to my cousin (her mother died of breast cancer and she spent several years in foster care in miller county) at 22, had a temporary placement living in my home at 24.

My cousin just within the last six months moved out of my home and on her own.

Not that I feel I need to toot my own horn or anything!

 

[danni]

No they don't.

Maybe not in a state where the family gets 1000 dollars per child, but in a state where the family does not even get enough money to cover BASIC needs, why else would the do it? :waitasec:

 

[*~Aimee~*]

WHEN I become a foster??

How about I tell you how long I have been dealing with the foster system in Missouri. Lets see I am 26 now, almost 27, I started doing respit care at 18, became guardian to my cousin (her mother died of breast cancer and she spent several years in foster care in miller county) at 22, had a temporary placement living in my home at 24.

My cousin just within the last six months moved out of my home and on her own.

Not that I feel I need to toot my own horn or anything!

your an angel. Like I wrote earlier I did nursing in home pediatric. It seems the foster parents I dealt with always seemed to care so much more for the birth parents. Lots of lucky kids out there. I know some say foster system is no good but all I have dealt with have been awesome.

I think it would be so hard getting attached to see the child return home then to be back. Up and down yoyo​

 

[danni]

your an angel. Like I wrote earlier I did nursing in home pediatric. It seems the foster parents I dealt with always seemed to care so much more for the birth parents. Lots of lucky kids out there. I know some say foster system is no good but all I have dealt with have been awesome.

I think it would be so hard getting attached to see the child return home then to be back. Up and down yoyo​

It is SUPER hard. I cared for twin girls. They were born in st louis, their mother was a prostitute these were babies 7 and 8 for her, all her children were in foster or adopted out. They were born at 7 months gestation, they were addicted to crack and we didn't know if they were going to live much less be "normal" children. They were in foster care with the same family for 18 months about 12 of those months I lived with the family day and night. It was a 55 year old "retired" nurse, and her husband. They also had a boy that was suphocated at the age of 4 months old. He had a feeding tube and was in a wheelchair/bedbound. The girls got adopted when they were 18 months old, and the little boy was 12 when the foster mom could no longer lift him, and he wasn't getting the standard of care SHE WANTED FOR HIM! He went to another AMAZING foster family where he is still living. Having the children leave your home is one of the hardest things in the world but fostering is one of the most rewarding because you have the chance to make a difference in a childs life.

Anyways, I am outta here see ya all same place tomorrow!

 

[CHICANA]

Maybe not in a state where the family gets 1000 dollars per child, but in a state where the family does not even get enough money to cover BASIC needs, why else would the do it? :waitasec:

A lot of them do it with the intention of adopting the child they foster. Then they get the adoption bonus, a tax deduction, a monthly check for adopting a child out of state custody,and if they adopt a special needs child who qualifies for disability, it's significantly more than what they'd make as a foster parent.
Since it sounds like you had good intentions, it might be hard for you to imagine that others don't .

 

[CHICANA]

your an angel. Like I wrote earlier I did nursing in home pediatric. It seems the foster parents I dealt with always seemed to care so much more for the birth parents. Lots of lucky kids out there. I know some say foster system is no good but all I have dealt with have been awesome.

I think it would be so hard getting attached to see the child return home then to be back. Up and down yoyo​

Did you mean they cared more than the birth parents ?

 

[*~Aimee~*]

Did you mean they cared more than the birth parents ?

I am saying the one's I have dealt with.....you can tell they treated them different. I had one case I went to both the foster parents home and then to the parents when the client had to "return home". This mom knew that if she did not see the client in 1 year time that she would loose them so every 10 1/2 months she would start to ask for them. This went on for years. So sad the child dealt with her about every 11 months only because she did not want to "loose" her.

Then another case had the parent throw the client against the wall which in turn rendered the client a quad. He was only 10 months old. Now the clients would would all change. He lived to be early 20's. Now yes the foster parents in these "cases" I took care/dealt with I would say cared lot more.

(This is only 2 of the many I worked)

I am not by any means that "all birth parents" are like this. If you read I wrote with what I have dealt with.


I didn't mean to upset ya. (hope this explains how I got my view....on the ones I dealt with)​

 

[CHICANA]

I am saying the one's I have dealt with.....you can tell they treated them different. I had one case I went to both the foster parents home and then to the parents when the client had to "return home". This mom knew that if she did not see the client in 1 year time that she would loose them so every 10 1/2 months she would start to ask for them. This went on for years. So sad the child dealt with her about every 11 months only because she did not want to "loose" her.

Then another case had the parent throw the client against the wall which in turn rendered the client a quad. He was only 10 months old. Now the clients would would all change. He lived to be early 20's. Now yes the foster parents in these "cases" I took care/dealt with I would say cared lot more.

(This is only 2 of the many I worked)

I am not by any means that "all birth parents" are like this. If you read I wrote with what I have dealt with.


I didn't mean to upset ya. (hope this explains how I got my view....on the ones I dealt with)​

In Missouri, it doesn't matter if the birth parent sees the child regularly or not, if the child isn't returned within 12-18 months (I think 18 but I can't remember), they move to terminate parental rights.

 

[butwhatif?]

I saw the comment and the myspace of the girl who wrote this. I don't understand what the phrase means? I guess it is best I don't know.It is just a weird statement. "I like turtles?"​

Re: Turtles
Slang term used in the bay area for marijuana. Coined turtle because it's green and makes you move slow.
OR:
Substitute for an 'easy' woman (ie - once their on their back they're *ed)
or:
an uncircumcised penis; the head of the penis enclosed in the prepuce
The turtle came out of its shell while I was playing with it.
OR:
VERB : During a fight, the act of covering up your head with both forearms and cowering. Significantly decreases the effectiveness of an opponent's attacks, however, it carries a massive reputation backlash.

NOUN : The actual act of doing a turtle.

NOUN 2 : Slang term for one who has done a turtle.
'Man, I was gonna beat him down, but he pulled a turtle on me.'
'A'ight, let's do this thang. No guns, no knives, no turtling.'
'I can't believe you wimped out on me! You're such a turtle.'

(per urban dictionary)
ETA: There's 7 pages worth of definitions....if I post anymore I'll probably get banned. Many are kinda x -rated.

 

[Turtles]

Re: Turtles
Slang term used in the bay area for marijuana. Coined turtle because it's green and makes you move slow.
OR:
Substitute for an 'easy' woman (ie - once their on their back they're *ed)
or:
an uncircumcised penis; the head of the penis enclosed in the prepuce
The turtle came out of its shell while I was playing with it.

(per urban dictionary)

yikes, that sure makes me think about changing my name. BTW, the name comes from my Nephew when he met my first born. He said that baby looks like a turtle