Moms Who Hate Their Own Children

[Confusion]

I had a great aunt that I loved dearly. She was Christian, classy and well educated for a woman of that time. She and her husband .....my grandfather's brother lived within blocks of us and I visited almost daily. She had several sons and a daughter she cherished. At that time all the kids were grown with families of their own.

She died a few years ago at almost a hundred years old. I had the chance to speak to her pastor a year or so before she died. He told me that she felt that her biggest sin ever was enjoying christian romance novels.

At her funeral.....that same pastor had the oddest funeral ever for her. It was all about forgiveness and mental illness.

Turns out that sweet great aunt had a son I had never met but had heard of in rare times. I thought he'd estranged himself from the family for some reason.

Turns out my great aunt hated him and always had. He was her first born and she denied him from delivery. She insited....although he was born at home with her mother and sisters attending that he was not his. She had given birth to a girl and someone had switched babies. She would not hold him or nurse him. She said she hated him and wished him gone or dead or both. She could not be trusted with him. The extended family stepped in to raise him. He never really lived with his family. If they tried to have him live home...his mother would either ignore him or tell him she hated him and that he was not her child. When he was in his very early teens he hired himself out as a live in farm hand and never really contacted his family much.

As his mother's life was coming to an end he tried again to reconnect with her and the family. He was in his early eighties. She still wanted nothing to do with him. He was heartbroken again....the family...even his elderly brothers and sisters still sided with their mother. They hardly knew him and only knew him as someone their mother truly hated.

I was gobsmacked to find this out. What could happen to make a mother hate her own child so much? Why one child and not the rest? How could a woman appear so utterly normal and do a fine job raising her other children and be so hateful to her firstborn? Back then...outward appearances were crucial. It was soooo covered up. It was like he didn't exist.

From what I have heard he was a broken man most of his life. He really tried toward the end of his life he worked with the pastor and other family members to reconnect with them. It failed

To tell the truth, it sounds like he may have been born because of rape or worse, although we never really know what might set someone else off. One of my grandmother's sisters was like that with her first son. She had a terrible relationship with his father, and she said it reminded her of it every time she looked at thim. My grandmother raised him until he joined the marines. His mother never did change her mind about him, but his brothers (from her second marriage) did accept him into their dysfunctional little family.

 

[Linda7NJ]

I had a great aunt that I loved dearly. She was Christian, classy and well educated for a woman of that time. She and her husband .....my grandfather's brother lived within blocks of us and I visited almost daily. She had several sons and a daughter she cherished. At that time all the kids were grown with families of their own.

She died a few years ago at almost a hundred years old. I had the chance to speak to her pastor a year or so before she died. He told me that she felt that her biggest sin ever was enjoying christian romance novels.

At her funeral.....that same pastor had the oddest funeral ever for her. It was all about forgiveness and mental illness.

Turns out that sweet great aunt had a son I had never met but had heard of in rare times. I thought he'd estranged himself from the family for some reason.

Turns out my great aunt hated him and always had. He was her first born and she denied him from delivery. She insited....although he was born at home with her mother and sisters attending that he was not his. She had given birth to a girl and someone had switched babies. She would not hold him or nurse him. She said she hated him and wished him gone or dead or both. She could not be trusted with him. The extended family stepped in to raise him. He never really lived with his family. If they tried to have him live home...his mother would either ignore him or tell him she hated him and that he was not her child. When he was in his very early teens he hired himself out as a live in farm hand and never really contacted his family much.

As his mother's life was coming to an end he tried again to reconnect with her and the family. He was in his early eighties. She still wanted nothing to do with him. He was heartbroken again....the family...even his elderly brothers and sisters still sided with their mother. They hardly knew him and only knew him as someone their mother truly hated.

I was gobsmacked to find this out. What could happen to make a mother hate her own child so much? Why one child and not the rest? How could a woman appear so utterly normal and do a fine job raising her other children and be so hateful to her firstborn? Back then...outward appearances were crucial. It was soooo covered up. It was like he didn't exist.

From what I have heard he was a broken man most of his life. He really tried toward the end of his life he worked with the pastor and other family members to reconnect with them. It failed

How very sad. I once worked with a girl that suffered awful post partum , depression, refused to believe the baby she brought home was the same one she gave birth to. It took her over a year before shed even hold him. Her husband really stepped up to the plate, but he was distraught over the whole situation


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[LotusPawprint]

I've only posted on one WS case until now, but after seeing this episode of Dr. Phil I am glad this thread is here. I share the outrage and sadness by everyone.

The first mother clearly has her own set of issues -- her childhood trauma, psychological problems, and her daughter's autism. It pained me to think of the damage she's done to her daughter -- in that her special needs require extra love, understanding, patience, and other tools.. and her mother is not only depriving her of those but doing just the opposite. I feel for the mother's past and the challenges I know can come with an autistic child, but in no way does it excuse or allow her to continue putting that child in harm's way. Physical, emotional, or verbal. I'm worried the damage done to her is irreversible.

The second "mom".... don't get me started! Because I won't ever stop! I'm not a regular viewer of Dr. Phil though I think he does a decent job most of the time. I couldn't understand why, when the "mother" was telling him what was and was not child abuse, he didn't say "well here are some people who CAN tell you what child abuse is." And bring out authorities, cuff her, and have CPS taking that sweet little girl to safety NOW! That way Dr Phil gets his ratings and the world gets confirmation that "mom" is in the right hands, as is the daughter.

I didn't know he was no longer an actual Doc/ licensed practioner. I would be baffled if he didn't report regardless of a "manditory" requirement, not because he's such a great guy or anything, but because this just happened on his stage. I was surprised there was no mention at the end of the show or on his website that the case was reported to LE and was now in the courts. I checked again this afternoon but nothing.

Dr. Phil has a foundation, aptly named the Dr. Phil Foundation, which among other things focuses on the welfare and wellbeing of children who are abused and victimized. I sent a message to the website inquiring if they had any information about the show, stories, or children and their well being. I did a little sleuthing to no avail but would much rather them let us know that things have been put into action.

I am so fearful for both girls, short and long term. Especially if their "moms" have any contact with them on or after the air-date of the show. It could trigger the mothers seeing themselves and snap. How scary to think these are not the only two parents like this to have precious innocent children in their care....

 

[Linda7NJ]

I've only posted on one WS case until now, but after seeing this episode of Dr. Phil I am glad this thread is here. I share the outrage and sadness by everyone.

The first mother clearly has her own set of issues -- her childhood trauma, psychological problems, and her daughter's autism. It pained me to think of the damage she's done to her daughter -- in that her special needs require extra love, understanding, patience, and other tools.. and her mother is not only depriving her of those but doing just the opposite. I feel for the mother's past and the challenges I know can come with an autistic child, but in no way does it excuse or allow her to continue putting that child in harm's way. Physical, emotional, or verbal. I'm worried the damage done to her is irreversible.

The second "mom".... don't get me started! Because I won't ever stop! I'm not a regular viewer of Dr. Phil though I think he does a decent job most of the time. I couldn't understand why, when the "mother" was telling him what was and was not child abuse, he didn't say "well here are some people who CAN tell you what child abuse is." And bring out authorities, cuff her, and have CPS taking that sweet little girl to safety NOW! That way Dr Phil gets his ratings and the world gets confirmation that "mom" is in the right hands, as is the daughter.

I didn't know he was no longer an actual Doc/ licensed practioner. I would be baffled if he didn't report regardless of a "manditory" requirement, not because he's such a great guy or anything, but because this just happened on his stage. I was surprised there was no mention at the end of the show or on his website that the case was reported to LE and was now in the courts. I checked again this afternoon but nothing.

Dr. Phil has a foundation, aptly named the Dr. Phil Foundation, which among other things focuses on the welfare and wellbeing of children who are abused and victimized. I sent a message to the website inquiring if they had any information about the show, stories, or children and their well being. I did a little sleuthing to no avail but would much rather them let us know that things have been put into action.

I am so fearful for both girls, short and long term. Especially if their "moms" have any contact with them on or after the air-date of the show. It could trigger the mothers seeing themselves and snap. How scary to think these are not the only two parents like this to have precious innocent children in their care....

Well.... I so enjoyed your post!
Be sure to keep on posting !


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[Filly]

I had a great aunt that I loved dearly. She was Christian, classy and well educated for a woman of that time. She and her husband .....my grandfather's brother lived within blocks of us and I visited almost daily. She had several sons and a daughter she cherished. At that time all the kids were grown with families of their own.

She died a few years ago at almost a hundred years old. I had the chance to speak to her pastor a year or so before she died. He told me that she felt that her biggest sin ever was enjoying christian romance novels.

At her funeral.....that same pastor had the oddest funeral ever for her. It was all about forgiveness and mental illness.

Turns out that sweet great aunt had a son I had never met but had heard of in rare times. I thought he'd estranged himself from the family for some reason.

Turns out my great aunt hated him and always had. He was her first born and she denied him from delivery. She insited....although he was born at home with her mother and sisters attending that he was not his. She had given birth to a girl and someone had switched babies. She would not hold him or nurse him. She said she hated him and wished him gone or dead or both. She could not be trusted with him. The extended family stepped in to raise him. He never really lived with his family. If they tried to have him live home...his mother would either ignore him or tell him she hated him and that he was not her child. When he was in his very early teens he hired himself out as a live in farm hand and never really contacted his family much.

As his mother's life was coming to an end he tried again to reconnect with her and the family. He was in his early eighties. She still wanted nothing to do with him. He was heartbroken again....the family...even his elderly brothers and sisters still sided with their mother. They hardly knew him and only knew him as someone their mother truly hated.

I was gobsmacked to find this out. What could happen to make a mother hate her own child so much? Why one child and not the rest? How could a woman appear so utterly normal and do a fine job raising her other children and be so hateful to her firstborn? Back then...outward appearances were crucial. It was soooo covered up. It was like he didn't exist.

From what I have heard he was a broken man most of his life. He really tried toward the end of his life he worked with the pastor and other family members to reconnect with them. It failed

Wow. You just never know.

That is so sad all around.

Poor man.