NH NH - Maura Murray, 21, Haverhill, 9 Feb 2004 - # 3

[Peabody]

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be insulting, I'm really just trying to read between the lines and sometimes guesses are wrong.

This is a confusing story, with people saying confusing things like that Maura was the picture of stability when all that seems to be reported of her last few weeks were someone who was completely unstable, and maybe depressed.

It seems the closer people are to someone they love who is missing, the more they may believe the person would never purposely leave, and yet that does happen.

prayers from me, also, that she is found alive although the possibility seems remote.

KatherineQ,

I did not find your remarks insulting, only misinformed. Thank you for your interest in Maura's case.

Her case is certainly a confusing story.

However, when it comes to facts regarding Maura personally being unstable and depressed, the only facts are: (1.) that she was crying uncontrollably at work one night before she went missing (2.) that she had 2 accidents in 2 nights/three days - and both were sliding on icy roads - most unfortunate, but not indicators of her being unstable (3.) that she decided to take a few days off of school and not tell anyone

In my review of these facts, I do not find them to be indicators at all of her being unstable or depressed.

No doubt, somthing had her feeling overwhelmed - but I think armywife said it very well on <modsnip - no longer a working site> and most likely, she was physically tired from working 2 part time jobs and maintaining Dean's List grades while being across the continent from the man she loved.

Being female, having 4 sisters and several daughters, I know it is not unusual to just have emotional meltdown and NOT BE UNSTABLE......there are times that are short lived when everything just seems to be too much.

Most of what is "published" on the internet about Maura being depressed or unstable is theory.........just as the police had a theory that she was suicidal and running away.

If you read Sharon's report on<modsnip - no longer a working site> you will see that the police had a theory that she was both suicidal and a runaway at the same time. I know that is one of the reasons the family begged them to look for her: The family told the police "IF you believe she is suicidal, then don't you have the obligation and responsibility to be looking for her to prevent her from harming herself." Their answer was that Maura was 21 and had the right to do as she pleased.

From this theory of the police, many have "assumed" that Maura was unstable and depressed. There is no coborating (sp) evidence that any family, friend or investigator can find.

Thank you for joining me in prayer for Maura and her loved ones.

 

[KatherineQ]

Peabody - I don't know her, so I'm kind of at a disadvantage here compared to you and others who do know her.

I'm only speaking as a stranger, but with some experience with depression.

To cry uncontrollably when there is no apparent external source of the upset is a big red flag. To pack up her room and not tell her fiance, her family or her friends that she was leaving, and to email her teachers with a lie that she had a family death and had to leave, really, these are huge red flags. To pretend to be cheerful through all of this and then quietly sneak off . . .

Stable people don't do this. They might tell friends I really need to get away, see you in a few days. Or they may pack a few things and head off for a few days of solitude. But to pack up her room and buy a LOT of alcohol and leave quietly is something entirely different.

To do the planning that Maura did, searching for a place to stay days ahead, and emailing professors, and then concealing her leaving from her friends, family and fiance, are all enormous steps.

I don't mean to sound hurtful. Have you consulted suicide prevention and support groups and talked about Maura?

 

[Masterj]

Peabody - I don't know her, so I'm kind of at a disadvantage here compared to you and others who do know her.

I'm only speaking as a stranger, but with some experience with depression.

To cry uncontrollably when there is no apparent external source of the upset is a big red flag. To pack up her room and not tell her fiance, her family or her friends that she was leaving, and to email her teachers with a lie that she had a family death and had to leave, really, these are huge red flags. To pretend to be cheerful through all of this and then quietly sneak off . . .

Stable people don't do this. They might tell friends I really need to get away, see you in a few days. Or they may pack a few things and head off for a few days of solitude. But to pack up her room and buy a LOT of alcohol and leave quietly is something entirely different.

To do the planning that Maura did, searching for a place to stay days ahead, and emailing professors, and then concealing her leaving from her friends, family and fiance, are all enormous steps.

I don't mean to sound hurtful. Have you consulted suicide prevention and support groups and talked about Maura?

I don't believe it has been confirmed that her room was packed up. It could just have easily been that she hadn't unpacked yet from break. Additionally, the amount of alcohol is not necessarily a lot.

Maura does not sound like the type to tell her friends she is going away for a few days. In my opinion she is someone who keeps to herself as she appears to trust herself to make the right decisions.

 

[KatherineQ]

I don't believe it has been confirmed that her room was packed up. It could just have easily been that she hadn't unpacked yet from break. Additionally, the amount of alcohol is not necessarily a lot.

Maura does not sound like the type to tell her friends she is going away for a few days. In my opinion she is someone who keeps to herself as she appears to trust herself to make the right decisions.

I don't know what you'd consider a "lot" of alcohol.

 

[Masterj]

I don't know what you'd consider a "lot" of alcohol.

We know she bought a bottle of baileys, one of kahlua and one vodka. I don't believe we have any idea what size these bottles are. In my opinion, the size of the bottles would help me determine whether or not it was a lot.

 

[KatherineQ]

And a box of red wine. And I've always read "bottles of vodka" although that might not be right.

 

[docwho3]

KatherineQ,

I did not find your remarks insulting, only misinformed. Thank you for your interest in Maura's case.

Her case is certainly a confusing story.

However, when it comes to facts regarding Maura personally being unstable and depressed, the only facts are: (1.) that she was crying uncontrollably at work one night before she went missing (2.) that she had 2 accidents in 2 nights/three days - and both were sliding on icy roads - most unfortunate, but not indicators of her being unstable (3.) that she decided to take a few days off of school and not tell anyone. . .

Oh, I don't know but how about adding to the list that she had 2 single car wrecks within a few days of each other at least one of which had alcohol involved. Could those have been suicide attempts? Many suicides have early attempts that fail before doing the real thing. Would L.E. have considered that as a possible red flag item? Probably. The day she left she was reported to have been seen on security camera footage, alone, buying a significant amount of alcohol and tylenol (which might have been another one of the reasons the L.E. thought she might have been suicidal since alcohol and tylenol is often a combo used in suicide attempts.) L.E. reported in the news reports that her room was packed up, even taking the pics off the walls, even though some have disputed that without any real proof of that I might add, and piled all her letters from her boyfriend on the bed along with other things(and there had been past problems between Maura & her boyfriend according to boyfriends moms news statement), again according to news reports quoting L.E. She left West Point possibly to change from a school where leaving improperly would have been illegal to attend Umass with a killer schedule in effect the whole time, according to you peabody, and then lies to her employer & to her college profs about her reasons
to leave (not typical for a level headed stable person of West Point type of character.) Then Maura lied to her boyfriend and failed to let him know what she was planning. She also failed to let her family know. (Yes I have heard the claims that she surely would have done so but the fact is that she did not do so and there is not one shred of evidence that she ever would have.)

I could go on and on but I mentioned all this, not to somehow dirty the name of the missing person but because I am getting tired of posters from the maura murray.com site coming over to this thread and browbeating posters for daring to follow the evidence to a logical conclusion (and a conclusion I might add that seems to be what L.E. came to long ago.) It is getting old to have people act as if we are all somehow being blind to be willing to look at the facts at their face value. When a fact might indicate Maura is alive and thus gets in the way of Maura being dead that fact is summarily dismissed as being a misquote or just plain wrong almost always without any supporting proof at all and if a poster persists in looking at facts he/she is spoken of as if they are somehow being unreasonable or are "assuming" things not in evidence. This smacks of spin control and it is unworthy of this forum.

. . .No doubt, somthing had her feeling overwhelmed - but I think armywife said it very well on <modsnip - no longer a working site>and most likely, she was physically tired from working 2 part time jobs and maintaining Dean's List grades while being across the continent from the man she loved. . .

Yes army wife said what she thought when she said

. . . With that being said I am going to post my theory next, though it is not completely done. I would love to hear what you guys have for input. I am a bit reluctant to post it on websleuths in fear of a lynching.... talk about determined to believe that this is a shiny happy world with all shiny happy people holding hands! Some of those folks are in serious denial! . . .

Actually I was the only person even hinted at (by peabody) not to post certain posts so the only real pressure or lynching on this thread has really come from the other side of the aisle so to speak. If you all want to believe that Maura is dead (as was the case for some from the time she had been gone only 10 days) at least allow others to view the evidence independant of pressure or accusations and without calling us a lynch mob in denial. As for me, I will continue to look in on this thread but I will not try to look into her willful leaving further as I think we have come close to violating Maura's privacy and don't want to cause her to be found against her will. I will continue to look into possibilities of foul play if any turn up.

. . .Most of what is "published" on the internet about Maura being depressed or unstable is theory.........just as the police had a theory that she was suicidal and running away. . .

That's a possible state of mind during a "meltdown."

. . .Their answer was that Maura was 21 and had the right to do as she pleased. . .

That seems to have been the right answer.

. . .From this theory of the police, many have "assumed" that Maura was unstable and depressed. There is no coborating (sp) evidence that any family, friend or investigator can find. . .

See the list of reasons above. Not sure "assumed" is the right description there. They looked at the evidence and came to a conlusion. You might think it was the wrong conclusion but no one just jumped to that conclusion without looking at things about the case that make that seem a reasonable conclusion.

. . .Thank you for joining me in prayer for Maura and her loved ones.

I too earnestly hope for a happy conclusion for Maura and her family. Before we split into name calling sides I think everyone should remember we really are all supposed to be here to attempt to help a hopefully happy conclusion take place. This is not a personal attack on you peabody or anyone but it is a cry for a more reasoned and careful approach to this discussion.

 

[nnglas]

DocWho,

I must admit, in the beginning I was totally against your theory. But the more I ponder this case, I am starting to agree with you.

There are still certain aspects of your theory that I just can't grasp. I just don't think someone she knew was following her to make sure she was safe. So I have to go with the thought that she either walked or hitchhiked out of there.

Another thing that makes me think that Maura may have disappeared is the call to her boyfriends cell phone. Ok, if the family thinks that it was her calling, she must have left the accident site ok. So going on that theory alone she must have willingly dropped out of sight. I don't buy that she had like 3 seconds to make a call, and she called him, and the cell phone wasn't working correctly, I mean all of that seems a little far fetched. If in fact she was being held against her will and she had like seconds to make a call from a phone booth or something, why call him with a calling card? I mean my experience with calling cards is that that is alot of numbers to dial, when she could have simply called 911, or the operator.

So, with that I am going to jump on your bandwagon, and hope that wherever she is she if safe and sound, and didn't hurt herself. Also, I pray that she at least contacts someone, anyone who knows her and lets them know that she is indeed ok. I know, I know, that is not likely, but I can still pray.

BTW, she could have hitchhiked and told the person who picked her up that she was leaving some sort of danger so she asked them not to report seeing her.

Another short point is that I think that while I believe that her family misses her very much, and I sympathize with them, I have to agree that from published reports, it seems that Maura was very much controlled by people around her. I am only saying that to say that it could very well be why she decided to disappear, if she decided to disappear.

JMO

 

[docwho3]

. . .BTW, she could have hitchhiked and told the person who picked her up that she was leaving some sort of danger so she asked them not to report seeing her.

Another short point is that I think that while I believe that her family misses her very much, and I sympathize with them, I have to agree that from published reports, it seems that Maura was very much controlled by people around her. I am only saying that to say that it could very well be why she decided to disappear, if she decided to disappear.

JMO

You make some good points there. Even though I posted my own theory that does not mean it is all set in concrete. It is certainly possible that she hiked out or even hitchhiked. In fact there are several possibilites and my personal theory is always subject to change as evidence surfaces. Thank you for the kind words. I hope that someday Maura and her family's troubles have a happy ending. Whatever happens, I am convinced that there are some intelligent people working hard on the case.

 

[Peabody]

Fred Murray is appealing the decision by the judge in Grafton County Superior Court to the New Hampshire State Supreme Court

Father Appeals To N.H. High Court For Missing Daughter's Records



POSTED: 12:16 pm EST January 31, 2006


CONCORD, N.H. -- The father of a Massachusetts woman missing for two years in New Hampshire is pressing his attempts to get police files.

Last week, a Superior Court judge rejected Fred Murray's request for investigative files, so he is appealing to the state Supreme Court.

Murray's daughter, Maura, of Hanson, Mass., disappeared in northern New Hampshire after a minor car accident in February 2004.

Link: http://www.thechamplainchannel.com/...015/detail.html

 

[Rachael]

My feeling is this.. IF someone picked Maura up near the scene of the accident and dropped her off unharmed they would have reported it to the police (provided that they heard about this case on the news or radio). The only way this would make sense would be if the person was not from the area (as in a truck driver making his/her way through the state ect). :waitasec: I would like to think that she took off on her own and I know that would be very hurtful to the family but I don't think that is the case. I wish it were.

 

[armywife210]

Ok DocWho, here I am. Don't get all bent at poor Peabody if it's me you have something against. I haven't had much time lately to spend online as I might like as my husband is getting ready to deploy. The time I do spend online has been spent gathering information and answering PMs on <modsnip - no longer a working website> as well as my theory at this point. I did that because I was requested to.
I will admit that I am totally bewildered by the thought that she just up and left on her own. I do have a bit of a sarcastic side to me which I admit, at times I need to curb. If I got a bit sarcastic, I do apologize.

That being said, I am still bewildered.
She had no reason to leave. She had no personality disorder. She had no legal problems. She had very good grades. She had a very close relationship with her family. She was not being controlled by anyone. She had no reason to fear if she really did want to leave UMass. There was nothing shady about her time at West Point, she never had a single honor violation. She didn't owe money. She wasn't involved in drugs. She drank lightly, and she carried tylenol. She got into two accidents. Well one of them was minor and most likely due to road conditions. No one was upset with her about the accidents.

The girl was stressed out and missed her boyfriend. Good gosh, I was in nearly the same situation that she was in when I was engaged. In fact, when I was a university student up in northern MN my fiance' was here at FT Sill. I was working like a maniac with school, going back and forth from MN to OK. I was so incredibly stressed. I have been in three car accidents in my life. One was when I was 16, just learning about MN ice and 4 wheel drives not being invincible. The other two were within a three week time period when I was completely stressed out from school and missing my fiance'. Did I think about taking off? Yea, I did think about taking off, but to Oklahoma. TO the one I love, not away from him. Have I gone on crying jigs when I am stressed? I am a woman, need I say more?

I see no evidence what so ever of her having to run from anything or anyone. A few days away by herself were in order though. When you are 21, you have a cell phone and a triple A card (both of which she had just gotten), what else do you need to feel safe?

It seems that it's just nicer to believe that she left on her own rather than that she was taken. The family wishes and prays that is true. But the family knows that it isn't. The vast majority of girls that go missing are abducted. Few do show up years later living a new life, but it's very few and in those cases deep down the family knew something was a bit off. So many girls go missing every year, some are found a few months later dead. Some are found years later dead, some are never found. There are even cases where they are abducted and kept against their will for years.

Certain family members don't even post on here anymore because it hurts them to see how people that don't even know Maura are coming to believe things that are not even close to being within her character. This hinders the public cry for answers. The publics insistence is what motivates authorities to put more effort into investigating, thus solving, crimes.

A family knows when something is deeply wrong. True she was a private person and liked to deal with things on her own. She was stressed out, but she was not ready to flee. There is a huge difference between having a heart of gold and not wanting people to worry about you, and having a heart of steel and taking off.

Maura's boyfriend knows she loved him and wanted nothing more than to be his wife. His mother remembers her talking with so much love about getting married to her son and having "little Billy's".

These people live with this pain every single day of their lives. They KNOW that she didn't just leave. They NEED answers. They need public support.

 

[docwho3]

. . .That being said, I am still bewildered.
She had no reason to leave. . .

Actually, as I used examples in previous posts to show, a missing person does not have to have what you or I would see as a valid reason to decide willfully leave. I know that may sound hard to believe but it is so and it is one reason that I went to the trouble to post examples. I did that to help people understand and not to intimidate anyone from posting contrary opinions. Sometimes the missing person goes missing for reasons known only to themselves, sometimes due to mental breakdown. We may not know the intimate details of their life but that does not stop them from leaving anyway.

Let me take a moment to say that I recognize your right to believe that she was the victem of foul play even though I see no evidence to support that so far and I do not mind in the least to try to point out any possible points about the case, as they occur to me, that might bear investigation and thus possibly yield the proof of foul play that you seek.

I don't require it be one way or the other. I tend to go by evidence. What little facts are known in this case lend to her being alive and having left on her own and the known statistics according to L.E. sites, so far, tend towards her being alive. That having been said, if evidence turns up to indicate otherwise I will quickly change my mind. I go by evidence.

If I take issue with some of your points it is not meant as an insult to you:

. . .She had no personality disorder. . .

Actually, you can't know her psychiatric health without having had access to her psych records or without having seen her professionally as her psychiatrist.

. . .She was not being controlled by anyone. . .

There are some hints in news reports that to my mind hint otherwise and I don't see how you can know that without living in the family. And again, I previously posted examples of family of a missing person saying there was no abnormal control even when the missing person was found and said there certainly was control. So don't feel badly if I and some others hesitate to take the family word about such things as being gospel.

. . .She had no reason to fear if she really did want to leave UMass. . .

Again we do not know that to be true. It is an assumption you make.

. . .There was nothing shady about her time at West Point, she never had a single honor violation. . . .

Ummmm no comment at this time. (Keeping my word.)

. . .She didn't owe money. She wasn't involved in drugs. She drank lightly, and she carried tylenol. She got into two accidents. Well one of them was minor and most likely due to road conditions. No one was upset with her about the accidents. . .

You are still looking for her to have what you would consider valid reasons to leave and, as I have learned in my time at websleuths, that is not how it works. Sometimes they just leave. As to the facts about her owing or not owing money, I doubt we would know that. (I have known friends to loan $1000 to each other only on their word.) As to the accidents I see you are already making excuses for her by mentioning possible road conditions when you,again, don't know for sure. I admit it is possible the two accidents weren't suicide attempts and I mentioned them in a previous post to point out that, in the total of the evidence known, it is easily understandable for L.E. and others of us to see Maura as being possibly unstable and/or suicidal and running away. For those of you that believe Maura is the victem of foul play I think you would serve your cause far better by finding some actual evidence of foul play than to continue to try to defend her actions as being pure as the driven snow. I doubt she was that pure just as I doubt she was evil but she was human with strengths & weaknesses. I am more concerned with learning if there was in fact any foul play. This was not a little girl. This was a woman with the right to leave in privacy if she wants but also with the right to not be murdered.

. . .It seems that it's just nicer to believe that she left on her own rather than that she was taken. The family wishes and prays that is true. . .

Ten days after she was gone family had evidently already been speaking of foul play rather than safe return:

(Published 2/19/04) . . .But he did say, although there were no new developments yesterday, he was not ready just yet to go along with the fears of family members that Maura Murray has been the victim of foul play. . .

Valley News

I mention that to respond to your point and also because that article says something to me about the psychology involved in some angles of this case, something that I had to learn about over time in reading cases here at Websleuths. Since I think most likely Maura left on her own I see no need to go into that point indepth now.

. . .The vast majority of girls that go missing are abducted. Few do show up years later living a new life, but it's very few and in those cases deep down the family knew something was a bit off. So many girls go missing every year, some are found a few months later dead. Some are found years later dead, some are never found. There are even cases where they are abducted and kept against their will for years. . .

As I said Maura was/is a woman, not a little girl.
According to L.E. websites the majority of missing persons are not the victem of foul play. You need to check your facts or see some of my previous posts. One of them has a link to an L.E. website which speaks to that subject. It may be in the locked thread but it is still readable.

In conclusion, Even though I presently think Maura left willfully, I would rather we all work towards making sure if there was or was not foul play instead of "being sarcastic". As a sort of peace offering let me point out some things that might bear looking into. I know some are just now being gone over in <modsnip - no longer a working website> but some of these were already brought up in the past here at websleuths.

1. Only one person has admited to being on the road alone with Maura that night, the construction worker. That means we have only his word and no others as to his actions that night. I never like uncorroborated statements.
Did he make it up? Maybe, but it bears investigation to rule out if nothing else.
2. There was mention made of a possible fake police car having been on the scene. This was never confirmed to my knowledge and in fact I think I read in past posts on the murray site that it had been discredited, but even so at the time it was brought up here I found a few listings of people using such a ploy and posted them and another poster mentioned even more instances.
3. If Maura did plan to leave and if she infact did have a helper as I have posited then that person could have decided to double cross her so finding such person if he/they exists could provide info you seek but take care because it could also violate her privacy.
4. I already posted about the footprints in the snow. If they were hers they might point to where she went. . . .perhaps to remains in the snow somewhere?

There is one other possibility which I do not yet mention as there is no basis.

 

[docwho3]

One extra little point: The <modsnip - no longer a working website> website lists her stats this way:

Missing Since: February 9, 2004
Age: 22
Gender: Female
Race: Caucasian
Height: 67 inches
Weight: 120 pounds
Hair Type: Curly
Hair Color: Brown
Eye Color: Blue-Green
Clothing: Possibly wearing a dark colored coat and jeans, carrying a black backpack.

I suppose that means she was 22 when she disappeared in case anyone wondered.

 

[Gabby]

Prayers for Maura and her loved ones... Come home soon Maura

 

[armywife210]

And a box of red wine. And I've always read "bottles of vodka" although that might not be right.

vodka was not true. There were 3 bottles of alcohol and one box of wine.
Two of those types are used to make a favorite drink. One of those bottles are used in her coffee.
If she were planning to drink them all in one inhale, I would agree that it is a bit much alcohol. If she were planning to consume from each bottle in the next few days, I would say she were on a relax and chill mission.
I have no idea how large the bottles were, but I do know that it's less expensive to by in a regular size bottle than in a small bottle, and for a casual drinker who will eventually consume it, why not by bigger. You can bring it back with you.

 

[armywife210]

Docwho,

I have been asked by the family to represent Maura, so I do know some things.

Why do you suppose that all those closest to her, who know her character and her future plans, her loves, would start to lean toward foul play from the getgo? I certainly dont think that it's because they want her gone. I certainly dont think its because they have a plan to use LE to track down that silly girl.

A controlling family certainly does not send their offspring to West Point where they will have no control over them for the next 9 years, four at WP and atleast 5 following.

There is nothing controlling about her boyfriend, so I am not sure what kind of control that there might be.

As for the supposed honor violation, or something of the sort, at WP that you hint of. Forgive me, but I happen to know that once anyone there has a violation of any sort the whole place knows your buisness. It's not that the place is a rumor mill but it's hard to keep a secret like that when you are given added details and you suddenly have no privilages. Especially when you are involved in things (track). Then when you leave after all of this, it's sort of a tip off.

 

[docwho3]

Docwho,

I have been asked by the family to represent Maura, so I do know some things. . .

At least you are now honest about being here as their rep., which you had not said until now.

. . .Why do you suppose that all those closest to her, who know her character and her future plans, her loves, would start to lean toward foul play from the getgo?. . .

That question used to nag at me a bit but I think I gained some insight into it recently so it is not necessary for me to go into it indepth here.

. . .I certainly dont think that it's because they want her gone. I certainly dont think its because they have a plan to use LE to track down that silly girl. . .

Well, actually, Fred was quoted on a news report as saying he didnt feel he should have to bear the expense of looking for her when he felt it was L.E.'s job, so I could think that is partly behind it if I wanted to take that remark as it was spoken and I have known other people that certainly would have meant it that way. Knowing that L.E. is unlikely to do much with the case as long as its considered a willful adult runaway might give one reason to continue to want the case painted as foul play because as an adult runaway it can get expensive for the family to have to do their own tracking down of the missing person. And you yourself said ". . .This hinders the public cry for answers. The publics insistence is what motivates authorities to put more effort into investigating, thus solving, crimes. . ."
Let me hasten to add though, that I have,as I said before, gained some insight which I think goes beyond that and it seems to me unnecessary to argue the point between us now.

. . .A controlling family certainly does not send their offspring to West Point where they will have no control over them for the next 9 years, four at WP and atleast 5 following. . .

I might disagree with you about that point and other things involving controling behavior but since I am no longer looking into her willful disappearance (to avoid violating her privacy) I don't feel the need to argue the point in depth at this time.

. . .As for the supposed honor violation, or something of the sort, at WP that you hint of. Forgive me, but I happen to know that once anyone there has a violation of any sort the whole place knows your buisness. It's not that the place is a rumor mill but it's hard to keep a secret like that when you are given added details and you suddenly have no privilages. Especially when you are involved in things (track). Then when you leave after all of this, it's sort of a tip off.

Remember that you were the one who brought the subject up, twice now. I have said publicly for the second time now, "No comment at this time." (keeping my word.)" In any case the point only lightly touches upon the overall case and so is not worth arguing over. And in case someone might therefore think that I know some great and terrible damning black hearted thing about Maura the answer is "no". I say that much because I don't want to dirty Maura's name by not answering your question publicly and yet I need to keep my word to someone else.

On another note: You may have noticed I have not posted on the Maura Murray.com site at all. This is partly because I understand that it is mostly (although not 100%) populated with people who strongly believe in only the foul play theory and I actually think that it is important to not disturb that thought process. There needs to be one online place that does all that can be done to rule out foul play without splitting their efforts into considering willful leaving as well and I think that site will pretty much do that.

Feel free to PM me if you have questions or comments. After all,if we both wish for the happiest conclusion possible for Maura & her family then we are on the same side in the end.

 

[CyberLaw]

Unless you were in Maura mind, in her life, in her own relam of reality, you do not know MAURA"S resons for leaving, what was going on in her life that you or anyone else was not "privvy" to. Maura was the person who owned her emotions and thoughts. She obviously had her own reasons for "ditching" her family and boyfriend and "running away".

The statement "she had no reason" to leave, can be and is applicable to many, many case of "voluntary" missing adults.

Of course that is not the perspective of the "voluntary missing person", they feel they have "plenty" of reasons to leave and they do. They just choose not to share those reasons or tell anyone they are planning on "go missing". Therefore to an "outside person" they had "no reason to leave"

If you don't think that a women is not "troubled" greatly and may not be "emotionally" unstable just because she ONLY: Breaks down "emotionally" and is "too emotionally distraught" to the extent that she needs help to return to her dorm room ad is crying "hysterically", and ONLY gets into one accident where alcohol may be a factor and then ONLY in almost as many days, gets into another car acccident where alcohol again may be a factor, in addition to packing up her dorm room, draining her bank account and then buying booze while she is "on the road", is not troubled, then please review your logic and facts.

Look at the behavior.........

Since that person is not concerned with their own safety,(let alone the safety of others) I would think this would be a very, strong sign that person is "unstable,". After all, they are showing signs of "self destructive" behavior.

That person is "in emotional pain" and needs help so they do not hurt themselves or other people.

Some people just don't want to attend University, just because their parents want them to, some people want to live their life, experience the world, learn new things, work a job or a career that their parents don't want them to, after all they are 21 and an adult.

They have now learned that there is a whole world out there and they are free as the adult they are, to explore it, even if it means not finishing school, becoming a nurse, becoming an Army Wife, moving all over the place every few years, and then to top it all of, to be a Mom.

Before or if they step into that life, many people want to experience a different life other then the one their parents mapped out for them, especially if the adult child sees that they have a choice for their own life and they do not have to do "everything their parents want, just to please them, and avoid any family conflict".

The regret of looking back on your life and saying: What if....why did I not, I should have, I had the opportunity, I wish I did, especially when you could "see the writing" on the wall, is not the way a lot of people "wished" they had lived their lives.

So instead of: I should have.......they did, because they are young, have no husband and children. They are single..........an adult and 21.

Sometimes "adult children" have to be loyal and true to themselves, their own wants and wishes for their own life over and above what their adult parents "want them and expect" them to do.

Adult parents cannot control adult children, some parents learn that the hard way.............

Again, I have no doubt, what so ever, that Maura left on her on and is living the life that she wants to. Not the life anyone else wants her to, her life, according to Maura Murray.

Also I just have to add: I agree with the reason that Doc gave for "the Murray's family" quick "assumption" that Maura is dead.

LE said in essence this is not a "criminal case" it is now up to you to find your daughter as it is very evident that she planned and did run away. This is now a civil case, a private case, and not a case that involves public safety or any "breaking of the law", nor should you expect the "taxpayer" to pay for LE to find your daughter as no law has been broken and there is no evidence of a crime being committed.

So now, Fred Murray thinks: Well if Maura "has been a victim of foul" play then LE has to look for her..........I will tell anyone who will listen that Maura is a victim and that LE is not doing enough in finding my daughter who is a victim of a crime. So if LE finds her alive and well, they have found her just like I want them to, at least I "made" them look for her by "saying that she is a victim of a crime" .

So the way I am going to "force" LE to do their job and find my daughter is to tell everyone that will listen is that Maura is a victim and LE is just sitting back and do nothing to "solve" this crime and find her.

Most parents of missing adult children would" be "tickled" pink" and "extremely relieved" to be told that there is no evidence of foul play and it appears that their adult son/daughter has run away.

I would rather if I was a parent of a 'voluntary" missing adult child not assume that my child meet with a violent, painful, horrible, terror induced end to her life at the hands either of a stranger or strangers. I would not even consider "entertaining" this thought as it is just too horrible to consider without any evidence supporting same. Let alone lead the public to believe this.

If there is no evidence to the contrary, I would take the sitaution at face value and accept the fact that my adult child ran away and knows what they are doing and how to take care of themselves. After all I raised them to be a self sufficient adult.........

That is why Doc's theory makes perfect sense..........I included in my previous post that I always thought that it was 'odd" to assume foul play so shortly after Maura "ran away" and to put forth this "only theory of foul play" in the media when it is evident from behavior and evidence that this is clearly not the case.

Wasn't this the technique that the Federal Government used with the American people to "sell the Iraq War" and the invasion of Iraq. Manipulation, lies and propaganda, all in the "guise" of protecting the people from WMD. Which never did exist...........talk about a "con".

 

[mocity]

I have been reading these posts and it makes me sad. Making points and having an adult discussion about what may or may not have happened is what people should be focused on and what others are interested in. As I read through these posts it sounds like everyone is just trying to outdue the other person on their posts. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. No one here knows for sure what happened no matter what their "source" is. I am sure everyone here just wants to get Maura home so can't we stop with the bickering and move forward?