NJ NJ - Stacey Grater, 36, Pemberton Township, 18 Feb 2006

  • #21
Did she owe anyone she got drugs from money? How long had she been clean for? What types of drugs did she use prior to becoming clean? And where there any stressors in her life prior to her disappearance? Addicts have a high likelihood of meeting people that cause them harm, so it would be important to look into contacts that she owed money to or any contacts that she previously did drugs with. Addicts also have a very high likelihood of returning to drug use. Any stressors in her life may help decide if she was more likely to reuse. The types of drugs could help decide if it was possible she would OD. I know it's painful for the family to think that way but all possibilities must be considered. But where is she??? How could she have not been found in all these years.
 
  • #22
I found a NamUs Profile of an unidentified/unknown skeletal remains.
https://identifyus.org/en/cases/9882

Also I mapped out from Pemberton Twp NJ to Berlin MD (Where the remains were found)
Doubtful that someone would drive that..but there is a common waterway.
 
  • #23
breaks my heart to read the "official" line on who stacey grater was and see how off it is to who her family knew her to be! even if she was a drug addict she would still deserve to be found (though it seems that she was actually a brave soul going through recovery)

i see that stacey's niece was here a few years ago. can anyone confirm what she said about the bike being found at the house? the article posted above and the charley project say she rode away and never came home, the family says different.

There are a lot of family thoughts on the Topix posts 121 - 140 of 155. They then stopped talking on the board.

Copied some of it below. They all feel the father did it & that the cops aren't doing anything because she used drugs. They feel she's still in the house :(


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she called 911 the day she went missing and the cops never went in the house to see if she was alright they just took the words of her father who told them she left...

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If there has been no activity on her bank account and credit cards since she went missing, the police/detectives know that she did not run away. Police do treat cases involving drug users or ex-drug users differently than cases involving non drug users. Therefore, since she has 8 siblings I would suggest that you take turns calling and/or visiting the police station every day. Insist on updates and/or new leads in her case. Don't let them forget her. Make her important to them.
Also if anyone knows of any problems between stacey and anyone else (including another family member (including her father)) they need to speek up for Stacey...she can't speek up for herself.

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she also called her councelor and her sponsor that weekend and left messages on the answering machine that he threatened to kill her she called the police that night and they never followed through to make sure she was ok it was a domestic abuse call and they just took the word of him that she left instead of checking the house they could have saved her life i mean if she wasnt dead already but aleast we could had closure instead of having to suffer do to rookie mistakes with no justice and no answers to what happened to her body its very disheartening and diappointing to my family who believed in protect and serve wich none of them seem to be doing these days there used to be really great non corrupt cops on the force my uncle is one of them and they were honest good cops who loved there job and would do anything for there fellow man now its like oh well she was a druggy who cares...HOW MUCH PROOF DO U NEED??

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straight we have been she has a brother who was a police officer for pemberton and they have done a piss poor job of helping us even though my uncle paid his dews to them and gave his time to help people for over ten years...and they cant even help us in this case she was a ex user not currently using drugs she was going to church along with getting support through counceling and methdone treatment the weekend she went missing she was due to go to a treatment facitlity to be wheened off the methadone wich she wanted to do for her daughter to prove she was stable now...we have been pounding the doors down and talking to the detectives on a regular basis or atleast trying to get in contact with them and they are either not there and will call us back and they never do ..or they are on vacation wich who takes a vacation every other weekend i mean come on there is only so much we can do to make them do anything i have contacted our local offices and congressmen attorney generals office and they cant do nothing i mean what are they in power for to just sit behind a desk and get paid to do nothing???I mean they have the proof they need to put her dad away without a body i have seen them put people behind bars without any of that becuase they knew they were the last ones to see them alive and she didnt go anywere else he said she left on her bike and never came back and her bike was in the house wich everyone knows about so this is no surprise for me to state the facts all her stuff was in the house everything her money her medicines her clothes her cellphone everything that any person would have taken with them..

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Next month will be five years my mother has been missing. She hasn't been heard from or seen. Her bank accounts haven't been touched. She is no longer with us but I grew up believing the police were there to help people. They have not helped my family and it's sad that they looked at my mother how ever they did and assumed her life wasn't worth anything so they did nothing for me or my family. She wasn't perfect but who really is? I have no respect for the police department for how they handled her case. It's disappointing that they gave up so fast and never listened to my family's voice. I would never wish this on my worst enemy I'd never want anyone to feel the pain myself and my family have to deal with everyday cause my family and her friends are missing a sister a aunt a cousin a friend and I'm missing my mother. I hope no other family has to go through this pain what kills me is that they police could have saved her but they might as well been involved in her death.

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you know jennifer me and her daughter have had nightmares but maybe more a dream from god i am wondering because her dream and mine were both the same she was hidden in the house inside the wall somewere and i have seen it on plenty of movies but its rediculous that they would even not take that into consideration to even consider it is ashame because I think that it might be were she is..sad but could be true it's just kinda weird that her daughter and me would have the same dream that she was in the walls somewere but hey it's just a possibility ya know
 
  • #24
  • #25
There are a lot of family thoughts on the Topix posts 121 - 140 of 155. They then stopped talking on the board.

Copied some of it below. They all feel the father did it & that the cops aren't doing anything because she used drugs. They feel she's still in the house :(

so so sad :( when they bring stacey home, i hope they also sue the police department for such a miscarriage of justice. is there any way we can reach out to LE to try and get pressure on to keep up the investigation? maybe now that there is possibly new folks on the force there, someone will give stacey the attention she deserves...
 
  • #26
Good question. I've messaged her FB page; left the link to this post there but there doesn't seem to be any activity. Maybe try posting on the Topix post to see if they're open to it?
 
  • #27
I live in the same town as Stacey, and almost forgot about her case. She really did seem to vanish into thin air. A couple weeks ago,they identified a body found not far from where she vanished, but the body was identified as a woman missing from Pennsylvania,and drugs were involved. Stacey lived in the White's Bog section of Country Lakes, which is very secluded and not very populated. There are alot of woods and cranberry bogs nearby.

I went into the post office in town today,and saw a flyer for a missing woman. She vanished a week or so ago after last being seen at the same post office. I don't know if she was found or not. I did some google searches, but came up empty. Her last name was BINGHAM or BINGAM
 
  • #28
NamUs MP #2693 - Stacey was last seen on February 18, 2006 at her father's residence where she was living at the time. She was expected for a critical appointment on February 19, 2006 but never made it. All her belongings were at the residence including cellphone, clothes and wallet with her credit card. Stacey's medications were also left at the residence.

Stacey Charley project

Topix- will they ever find Stacey Lynn Grater? -Feb 20, 2007 perhaps i can explain you see she lived with her father not ours and he said nothing of her being missing to me her big sis it was only 10 days before i was made aware she was mia ,so as soon as i was told i reported her missing he would'nt ,that part has been eating me alive for the past year and the rest of her family as well,we also had to wait and find out if her counselor had heard from her took time for her to break confidentiality ,so therefore we didnt wait so long ,it's called police protocol something they failed to follow the night before she went missing.
believe me when i say we loved her and didnt blow her off like you seem to imply
heartbroken in nj
 
  • #29
Roselvr, clear some of your PMs,I tried to respond to your PM,but I cant send a message because your PM box is full
 
  • #30
Sorry; its cleaned
 
  • #31
NamUs Case # 2693 has had changes made. You can view the case by clicking the url below

The following fields have been changed:
Photo Added

Surprised to see dental xrays uploaded.
 

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  • #32
Missing Since : February 18, 2006 from Pemberton Township, New Jersey
Classification: Endangered Missing
Date of Birth: February 17, 1970
Age: 36 years old
Height and Weight: 5'4 - 5'5, 90 - 100 pounds
Distinguishing Characteristics: Caucasian female. Brown hair, blue eyes.
Medical Conditions: Grater was addicted to drugs at the time of her disappearance.

Details of Disappearance Grater on the morning of February 18, 2006, the day after her thirty-sixth birthday, at her residence in Pemberton Township, New Jersey. She told her father, whom she lived with, that she was going to ride her orange bicycle to the Wawa convenience store on Lakehurst Road in the Country Lakes section of the township. Grater never returned home and has never been heard from again. She was not reported missing until March.

Although there is no hard evidence of foul play in Grater's case, authorities consider her disappearance suspicious. At the time she went missing she was preparing to enter a drug treatment center and had packed her belongings. She took nothing with her when she disappeared except her bicycle, and there's been no activity on her bank account or credit cards since she was last seen. She has gone missing before, but never for this long, and it's uncharacteristic of her to abandon her teenage daughter. Her case remains unsolved.



Stacey would have been 44 today :cake4u:

Tomorrow is 8 years missing! :banghead:

:rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose: :rose:
 
  • #33
Too long to not have answers.
 
  • #34
Could this be Stacey? https://identifyus.org/en/cases/12141

The New Balance sneakers really have me wondering, since that is a brand Stacey is known to wear. I wish we knew her shoe size. The ones found with the UI are size 9 and are white, orange and purple. The clothing is very descriptive as well maybe her daughter or a family could recognize them as belonging to Stacey.
 
  • #35
Could this be Stacey? https://identifyus.org/en/cases/12141

The New Balance sneakers really have me wondering, since that is a brand Stacey is known to wear. I wish we knew her shoe size. The ones found with the UI are size 9 and are white, orange and purple. The clothing is very descriptive as well maybe her daughter or a family could recognize them as belonging to Stacey.

I started a thread for the UI, since I could find none.

NJ West Deptford, WhtFem UP12141, 34-60, New Balance Sneakers Size 9, Jan '14 - Websleuths Crime Sleuthing Community
 
  • #36
Could this be Stacey? https://identifyus.org/en/cases/12141

The New Balance sneakers really have me wondering, since that is a brand Stacey is known to wear. I wish we knew her shoe size. The ones found with the UI are size 9 and are white, orange and purple. The clothing is very descriptive as well maybe her daughter or a family could recognize them as belonging to Stacey.

If it was Stacey; they wouldn't have been able to get finger prints. She would have been bones; not recently decaying.
 
  • #37
If it was Stacey; they wouldn't have been able to get finger prints. She would have been bones; not recently decaying.

You're right about the fingerprints. Hopefully the ones lifted from the UI are viable enough for comparison. I'm sure they wouldnt enter them in NamUs if they weren't but hey, you never know. And regarding Stacey's remains being found as skeletal I'd have to say that you're assuming she died close to or exactly on the day she went missing. I've learned through alot of missing persons cases to never assume anything. Many people go missing for years sometimes decades leaving their whole life behind including jobs, husband, children etc, only to pop up ALIVE. Statistically speaking, Stacey may not be alive but I can't sit here and say for sure she is dead. And God help us all if detectives assume and give up searching for the missing that easily.
 
  • #38
You're right about the fingerprints. Hopefully the ones lifted from the UI are viable enough for comparison. I'm sure they wouldnt enter them in NamUs if they weren't but hey, you never know. And regarding Stacey's remains being found as skeletal I'd have to say that you're assuming she died close to or exactly on the day she went missing. I've learned through alot of missing persons cases to never assume anything. Many people go missing for years sometimes decades leaving their whole life behind including jobs, husband, children etc, only to pop up ALIVE. Statistically speaking, Stacey may not be alive but I can't sit here and say for sure she is dead. And God help us all if detectives assume and give up searching for the missing that easily.

According to what is known; she & her father got into it; it went too far. Her stuff (including bike) was still in his house. She was always seen riding her bike. Something happened; whether it was her father or she bought bad drugs (was supposedly clean). Her father said he killed her. Cops aren't doing anything.

Today is 9 years missing.
 
  • #39
Frustrating case. She vanished only quarter mile or so from my house, so it really hits close to home, literally
 
  • #40
They just found a Body today in the woods near Stacy's House. They are not releasing any details about the body, sex, etc, but it is very close to Stacy's house

EDIT UPDATE: I heard from an inside source that thinks this Body is likely the remains of Stacy
 

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