Howdy, a few of my posts have been removed so please delete again if I'm not doing this right. I was wondering if anyone finds the small fender bender he was in a few days before the incident at hand was of interest? In an affidavit or some other court document I had read he was in an accident around 3:54 am--the light changed and the car in front of him didn't move but he did and ran into the back of the car. Did anyone else read this from the documents from the court? I think the thing i find weird is why was he out that early in the morning--I mean that is early. I assumed he was on his way to work but the other thought I had was some sort of manic episode type of thing. Please delete if post isn't done right or appropriate.
That is just one more thing on top of everything. It could involve a drivers license suspension, serious fines, and/or cause increased issues with his National Guards reserves. Also, it is not uncommon for people under extreme stress and adversity to be clumsy, accident prone due to distractions, or make simple errors they would normally not make.
MOO
The objective stress load he was under is normal for a young man with children, it is him personally that felt too burdened, allowing anxiety to take the place of productive action.
Having so much taken care of for a person by the military creates a huge shock when transitioning to footing the responsibility for it all in the civilian world.
I see nothing normal about having so many stressors (good and bad) occurring. Also I respectfully disagree with the idea it is on him for feeling "burdened" and "allowing anxiety" to take the place of "productive action". Not everyone is gifted with the remarkable abilities to not be human, not experience normal human reactions or emotions, and to mentally override chemical, visceral, and physiological body reactions that manifest mental health issues. These types of statements really alienate, stigmatize, and minimize the battles faced by many in our society. This is essentially like blaming a paralyzed person in a wheelchair for not "using their legs" when the chair was stuck on the railroad tracks and the get hit by a train. Or like telling a female victim of assault or violence to put on a smile, don't double check the doors are locked, and get over it. LOL
I posted in the previous thread that transitioning to civilian life can be brutal and alienating. That is also a life stressor on top of all the other things. I emphasized this in many posts.
When I read about his stress, how much of it is created by him? ( like driving with no insurance)
It kind of fits with this post
@Boxer wrote
"The objective stress load he was under is normal for a young man with children, it is him personally that felt too burdened, allowing anxiety to take the place of productive action.
Having so much taken care of for a person by the military creates a huge shock when transitioning to footing the responsibility for it all in the civilian world.
Sadly, many of the actual symptoms of and ways mental health disorders are diagnosed is when seemingly and previously functioning people no longer are able to maintain regulations of the basics in their lives. This is not abnormal. We have all, for the most part, gone through losses that create a a pattern of grief. In those moments, we all for the most part, might not be as productive as usual, might slip on chores, tasks, forget to eat, over eat, not shower, stay on the couch for days, or miss hygiene. Usually that self corrects, because we all have resiliency. It is when all energy or focus ends up lost in the adverse situation and symptoms, and things keep falling apart, and the pathway to get back on track is overwhelming invisible that people simply don't have the resiliency or capacity to fix things. When you are so far in, it is very difficult to be objective.
For those of you who have been blessed and have not had massive adversity, it is very easy for many things to slip. Being unhoused is very destabilizing. It is also very expensive in its own right, can't budget cooking, hotel costs, not being able to unwind, it is constant movement, no time to relax or decompress. It is not surprising that a car insurance lapsed. This can happen with anyone overwhelmed by other stressors. This can happen to anyone who lives paycheck to paycheck, gets an unexpected bill, and something else goes unpaid. It doesn't mean it is a pattern or he was like
it, I am not paying this and I am going to buy a frivolous item instead. This is just one more thing to add to all the things. This literally IS part of symptoms. Our bodies do NOT recognize the difference from being chased by a saber tooth tiger from being homeless, living paycheck to paycheck, losing a job, losing a relationship, or any other modern day stress that creates fight or flight anxiety.
here is the original.
I have seen this before, I think its important and very much a factor.
Is it normal stress for a young father who is working but yet can’t afford a rental spot and is homeless. No place to take his kids on visits or no money or insure his vehicle, or even to be able to feed his dog as was in the case with Decker? That’s significant stress in my opinion for a 32 year old. For any age, I would think. Imoo
Just a different perspective not sticking up for him. Just say…
