Outrage Over Parents Who Had Down Syndrome Child Undergo Cosmetic Surgery

[imthemom]

Believe me when I say I am not worried. I know that may sound weird but i am not. I am ready for whatever is given to me. All I have ever wanted was a baby and either way that is what I am getting. :blowkiss:

Congrats Indy you will make a great mom and I am sure have a wonderful child with or without DS. Enjoy because they grow so fast. It seems like my 3 year old was just born. I wish sometimes I could make time stand still and they would never grow up.

 

[piper2]

LD, I'm glad you had such a good relationship with "Uncle Bobby", it sounds like you both cherished each other's company. However, I have to disagree with you on your use of language. Forget "political correctness", as I say above, these words are archaic and incorrect, not to mention cruel. Imbecile, idiot and moron used to be "classifications" used by the medical profession to label people with intellectual disabilities, would it be okay to have these words used to describe someone you love? I doubt it. As I expressed in another thread, words have the power to evoke both positive and negative images and ideas. It is important to understand what is behind the language we use and WHY some words are offensive, not just that they are.

You said "it won't make a difference at all. She will still be a "beautiful mentally retarded person" who will grow up to give much love to those who love her". I appreciate your sentiment but with respect, I think it is misplaced. What anyone looks like SHOULD not make a difference, but we all know it does. What WILL make a difference to this girl will be the attitudes of the people she encounters in her, the respect she receives as a human being, and most importantly the opportunities she may or may not have to grow, reach her full potential and achieve her goals and dreams. All of these things are inextricably connected.

Having a disability - whether physical, intellectual or otherwise, need not prevent us from reaching our full potential, unfortunately the attitudes of others can and do.

IMO (and experience)

According to http://http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/31076

Moron was originally a scientific term, coined around 1912 by psychologist Henry Goddard from a Greek word meaning "dull" or "foolish", and used on the English version of the "Binet Scale" of human intelligence. The Binet Scale was developed in the early 1900's by Alfred Binet, a French psychologist and inventor of the first usable intelligence test, the basis of today's IQ test. The Binet Scale went approximately as follows:

Normal ----- IQ 85-115
Deficient ---- IQ 71-84
Moron ------ IQ 51-70
Imbecile ---- IQ 26-50
Idiot -------- IQ 0-25

Now, I am not saying these words aren't hurtful and should be used. I just wanted to point out that they were not slurs when they started. When they started to be used to hurt, the powers that be changed the words to something else. It will happen time and time again. There is nothing they can change it to that bigots/bullies won't turn against them. And I am talking about all slurs, not just against the Down's Syndrome people.

As for the Mother who had the cosmetic surgery on her Daughter, I say live and let live. If she had such a problem with her daughter and the surgery made it possible to love her, why not? It really is her choice. As for the surgery being painful, IT'S SURGERY! It's gonna hurt. There is no getting around it. They give painkillers to the patients. Would anyone deny surgery for a kid born with fused finger and toes because it would hurt? What about circumcision? That hurts I'm pretty sure. The question of cosmetic surgery for a Down's syndrome person is simply a moral one. I am for it because people are cruel and they judge. Maybe this girl will benefit in that people who encounter her won't immediatley assume she is not going to be able to do things. But of course it is still up to the parents and of course the child.

 

[shadowraiths]

How sad that her own mother had a hard time looking at her.. I'm also inclined to think that these surgeries are also for MOM's benefit.

Well then, you might consider doing some reading up on cleft palate and the operations children undergo for that particular birth anomally. Or otherwise put, research does indicate that there is a significant correlation between a child's looks and their mother's ability to attach (attachment ala Ainsworth & Bowlby is considered the cornerstone of healthy childhood development). Imho, once we, as a society begin to acknowledge that a) attachment is not something that just "naturally occurs" once a child is born, b) start recognizing that "mothers are, by nature, nurturing" is really a myth, and c) fundamentally understand that raising children does take work and does require a life-long selfless commitment, we might begin to see fewer fillicides. One can only hope.