GUILTY PA - Ellen Robb, 49, beaten to death, Montgomery County, 22 Dec 2006

[mfmangel1]

The poor young daughter had a counselor? What kind--standard school counselor or troubled kid counselor?

Thinking of Olivia living in a home with depressed parents that were wanting to be divorced for years....Living separate lives....Actually a house divided in two....What a mess.

 

[AWL]

Thinking of Olivia living in a home with depressed parents that were wanting to be divorced for years....Living separate lives....Actually a house divided in two....What a mess.

I knew them all. Olivia was a secure, normal and happy child. Individuals who suffer from depression can also be very high functioning. Both parents were very involved in Olivia's llife - most of the time separately, but at times together. Olivia was aware of some disfunctional parts in the family life however both parents managed to provide for her on every level.

 

[Bobbisangel]

It is hard to believe that this killer is only 56 yrs old. I saw them bringing him out of his home...I believe that is where it was...and I thought he was an old man. I just checked out a picture of him on the forum just to make sure I was seeing the right person and he still looks like he is in his late 60"s or so.

Him and Ellen must have waited to have a child kind of late in life as their daughter is only 12 yrs. Olivia is the one that my heart goes out to. I know how hard this is for a child when one parent murders the other. I don't know if she believes that her dad murdered her mom but she will in time. I'm sure that her family will get her into grief therapy and the one thing that they do in grief therapy is face the facts head on. Her therapist will help her cope with the fact that her dad did murder her mother. It is a shame that the killer never gives the children a thought when they murder the other parent. They don't think about the impact the murder will have on the life of their child for ever. It is heartbreaking to say the least. These killers are so darn self centered that no one matters but them. Love their kids? If they truly loved their children the way a dad should love his child he would never hurt the child this way. That is my opinion anyway after living through the same nightmare.

 

[AWL]

I was very touched by your post and wanted to respond in some way.
It must have been terrible to live through that kind of pain and loss. Nobody can know or understand the pain except from first hand experience. Hopefully, like you said, those loved ones closest to Olivia will help her and assist her with the difficult work of working with and through her grief and loss.

I hope you have healed, as I hope one day Olivia will as well.

 

[curious1]

Possible reasons for the delay in making an arrest:

1. Castor does not want to "Nifong", especially since he is probably running for County Commissioner. He may go so far as to empanel a grand jury in order to have the GJ issue the indictment instead of doing it himself. It gives him political cover.

Hee, I love that fact that 'Nifong' is taking on a whole new meaning...

Webster's: Nifong....to totally screw up a case as a prosecuter...to act as not only prosecutor, but judge and jury....I could go on an and on....

 

[JAJ]

Apparently, Dr. Jekyl kept his evil self hidden at work:


http://media.www.dailypennsylvanian.com/media/storage/paper882/news/2007/01/16/News/Students.Speak.Out.About.Robb-2633724.shtml?sourcedomain=www.dailypennsylvanian.com&MIIHost=media.collegepublisher.com

 

[curious1]

Isn't that the way it usually is (although we have heard rumblings here that he let his true self leak out to others on some level)....they have this uncanny ability to compartmentalize their anger. To everyone else they are nice, polite even helpful. They are able to put on a good front, but at home their spouse or children bear the full brunt of their unhappiness with themselves and all their short comings. Why can't these brutes resort to self mutilation and suicide? They are angry at themselves, but I guess they love themselves too much to admit it and to bring harm to themselves. Oh and ultimately they are cowards. JMHO.

 

[Clearly Confused]

Apparently, Dr. Jekyl kept his evil self hidden at work:


http://media.www.dailypennsylvanian.com/media/storage/paper882/news/2007/01/16/News/Students.Speak.Out.About.Robb-2633724.shtml?sourcedomain=www.dailypennsylvanian.com&MIIHost=media.collegepublisher.com

There isn't a single person at Penn that would say a bad thing about him in public. I am surprised they even spoke out at all! Any of the professors I asked about this pretends they are clueless about the murder.:silenced:

Edited to add-Welcome JAJ!

 

[fran]

Isn't that the way it usually is (although we have heard rumblings here that he let his true self leak out to others on some level)....they have this uncanny ability to compartmentalize their anger. To everyone else they are nice, polite even helpful. They are able to put on a good front, but at home their spouse or children bear the full brunt of their unhappiness with themselves and all their short comings. Why can't these brutes resort to self mutilation and suicide? They are angry at themselves, but I guess they love themselves too much to admit it and to bring harm to themselves. Oh and ultimately they are cowards. JMHO.

I've known someone (well, a few) in an abusive relationship and that's exactly how it works. What goes on at home is nobody's business. IMHO, puts a different meaning of 'behind closed doors.' Everything is wonderful and we're all happy as a lark, until the door is closed.

The abuser is full of themselves and it's all about THEM. Everything and everyone else in their possession is just that, a possession. Their wife isn't a person and their children aren't people, they're possessions.

I think you're right, they are angry at themselves,.......but it's always someone else's fault.

Oh, and you're right, all of the abusers I've known were cowards. That's why they pick on those that are smaller, weaker, less able to defend themselves. They're pathetic really.

JMHO
fran

 

[angarella]

I am really perplexed by this case. I am trying to digest, absorb and register it all before I make any more comments.

Right now, I just want to send thoughts and prayers to Olivia. And say that I cannot even begin to imagine the horror that poor Ellen went through that morning and I hope that she is at peace and smiling down at her baby girl. RIP in Ellen.

IMO

Ang

 

[nanandjim]

.. all of the abusers I've known were cowards. That's why they pick on those that are smaller, weaker, less able to defend themselves. They're pathetic really.

Yes, they are cowards who know who they can abuse and who they can't. I really think that they hate themselves and project it on to others who are weaker and cannot stand up for themselves.

They beat down their victims literally and figuratively. It is like walking on eggshells when a victim is around this kind of person. The victim is made to believe that it is all his/her fault. The victim is persuaded to keep quiet because "no one would believe him/her any way."

The abuser is also really afraid of losing control of the victim. S/he will use whatever means possible to maintain the control. If the victim breaks away, the abuser knows what buttons to push to reign the victim back in. It usually involves apologies, gifts, being really nice. If this doesn't work, the abuser may stalk and threaten the victim, so much so, that the victim unwillingly returns out of fear.

In any case, this guy lost control of his victim. She was actually going to leave. To add insult to injury, she was taking the child; and he was going to have to pay a hefty sum to her. He wasn't about to let that happen.

I feel certain that he tried every manipulative tactic that he could think of. When she didn't bite, he was forced to kill her. Of course, that was her fault, at least in his own sick mind.

The last thing that I want to say is that many abusers are very successful. They hide behind this image and wrongly believe that they'd never be suspected of committing such a heinous crime or even of abusing their spouses.

Sometimes, it works; and sometimes, it doesn't. Hopefully, it won't work in this case.

 

[Hedidit]

You are right and how sad is that? You wonder how all this can be stopped. Perhaps if more men/husbands were arrested and jailed for abuse, they might think twice. More importantly, where can the abused go and feel safe without sacrificing her children?

You told it like it is and again...how sad is that?

 

[mfmangel1]

I knew them all. Olivia was a secure, normal and happy child. Individuals who suffer from depression can also be very high functioning. Both parents were very involved in Olivia's llife - most of the time separately, but at times together. Olivia was aware of some disfunctional parts in the family life however both parents managed to provide for her on every level.

I am not at all disputing the fact that the parents were devoted to Olivia nor the fact that people that suffer from depression can be high functioning.

I was merely stating that Olivia had to be aware of the dysfunctional relationship she had been exposed to her entire life; hence the need for counseling.

Quite frankly, in that situation, who wouldn't need counseling?

 

[luthersmama]

Very interesting article today in the Inquirer:

http://www.philly.com/mld/philly/16584062.htm

His salary was $180,000! I had guessed $150,000. What a tightwad.

 

[curious1]

Thanks for the article luthersmama. It just so sad. If he did do this it is very said for his Mother. I mean the woman survives the holocaust and thinks she has survived the worst and then her son turns out to be a murderer. He has destroyed so many lives. I will never understand people who think murder is a solution....if you get caught you lose so much more than you would ever gain in not getting caught. Why take that gamble?

 

[AWL]

Very interesting article today in the Inquirer:

http://www.philly.com/mld/philly/16584062.htm

His salary was $180,000! I had guessed $150,000. What a tightwad.

This would probably be accurate. His salary was GROSSLY misrepresented over the weeks since Ellen's killing.

 

[luthersmama]

This would probably be accurate. His salary was GROSSLY misrepresented over the weeks since Ellen's killing.

After taxes he must have been taking home at least $100,000. The profs get very generous benefits, including tuition discounts for their kids. The house has a small mortgage, but the total housing cost is probably only about $20,000 per year. Yet he wouldn't pay for the sales tax for Ellen to get a better used car from her brother.

She was a prisoner in her own home.

 

[nanandjim]

...Yet he wouldn't pay for the sales tax for Ellen to get a better used car from her brother.

She was a prisoner in her own home.

It was about control. However, Ellen allowed it. It's amazing how a beautiful, college educated woman who was outgoing and lively became an introverted, depressed woman who wouldn't leave home. This just shows you what emotional abuse and mind control can do to a person. It's no wonder that Michael Devlin could so easily control a young boy using the same if not worse techniques.

 

[curious1]

It happens all the time nan, I think am watching my sister beginning to go through this now. Things have been going on for the past 3 - 4 years that we didn't know about and she just can't see where it is headed. So sad

 

[nanandjim]

It happens all the time nan, I think am watching my sister beginning to go through this now. Things have been going on for the past 3 - 4 years that we didn't know about and she just can't see where it is headed. So sad

Make sure that you stay in touch with your sister and always let her know that she has somewhere she can come to if she decides to leave this guy. That's so very important.