Poll for the Armchair Psychologists

[TorisMom003]

Theft would absolutely be subsequent to, and dependent on, the addiction: Symptom, yes, consequence, yes: I assure you, I am not the one with the problem in the area of critical thinking.

Bolded by me

When one does this type of thing it takes away from the rest of the post, IMO.

 

[Linda7NJ]

I wonder what she wrote on those pages of the journal that later were ripped out?

More lies.

IMO


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[SMK]

Bolded by me

When one does this type of thing it takes away from the rest of the post, IMO.

I know, but he is always, always telling me that I do not know how to think. And I believe he doesn't.

 

[TorisMom003]

I know, but he is always, always telling me that I do not know how to think. And I believe he doesn't.

What one believes matters not to others, does it? If one knows what is in ones self then nothing else should matter. However jabs at others shows the level of understanding as well.

 

[SMK]

Look, we should probably not argue the point here, but agree to differ, there are 'honest' ways to get drugs, or at least generate an income .. the decisions made along the way designed to feed a habit show a difference in character, but that is my opinion only

Yes, in the end, better not to be addicted at all, and spend no income on such ends, whether honestly earned or not. I am thinking of someone such as Paul Schloesser who stole to feed his addiction, but when diagnosed and medicated as bipolar in prison, became a new person.

 

[SMK]

What one believes matters not to others, does it? If one knows what is in ones self then nothing else should matter. However jabs at others shows the level of understanding as well.

True: But as he jabs me (keeps hinting that I am an example of Americans who do not know science, have no critical thinking skills) I just decided to jab him back: I am only human

 

[Linda7NJ]

I agree that theft is dishonest; the fact remains, there are people without means who believe they must steal to support their addiction.

There are plenty of homeless addicts that have never stolen a thing. They may pan handle, they may run errands, mow grass, do odd jobs... They don't rob people and steal. Many are people with serious mental illness and in my experience most are war veterans.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Linda7NJ]

I agree that theft is dishonest; the fact remains, there are people without means who believe they must steal to support their addiction.

Stealing is a choice


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Tulessa]

True: But as he jabs me (keeps hinting that I am an example of Americans who do not know science, have no critical thinking skills) I just decided to jab him back: I am only human

That's why we have the ignore button, It's a beautiful feature. :blushing:

 

[Linda7NJ]

SMK

lil buddy isn't a male


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[SMK]

SMK

lil buddy isn't a male


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

well, "he" sure came off as one

 

[TorisMom003]

How does one come off as male or female? Sometimes it's easy to tell by the name as to the gender. But how does one come off as a certain sex?

 

[Linda7NJ]

As the wife of a terrific husband and the mother of a son... I'm a tad offended


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[MeeBee]

No, saying that a child is behaving like a brat is not telling the child that it is not their fault.

As a parent (and I am one) you have to do the best that you can when it comes to raising your children. What works for one child more often than not will not work for every other child. There are in fact times when a parent is at the end of their own rope. Even though the parent is the adult does not mean that they have their own issues they must deal with. Every person is raised a certain way and believes that they should or should not raise their own children in a way like they were raised. As a parent if you have a child that is completely out of control and you have other children in the home to consider that can be harmed by the out of control child then there are times when you have to let the out of control child go. If the out of control child decides to move in with her boyfriend to get away from your rules then sometimes the parent must let them go.

No matter what Jodi would have the world believe she did not have an abusive childhood. There is proof of this in the fact that Jodi herself admitted to FAMILY vacations to nice locations. An abusive parent would simply find someone for the child to stay with instead of going on the vacation with the parents. Jodi could have been sent away to live in a home for troubled kids instead of her parents trying to raise her and teach her right from wrong.

Love, caring, respect and concern? Jodi received all of those things. Even as an adult Jodi is receiving those things. But let's look at how she is repaying her parents for those things shall we? Jodi has told the world that her parents abused her. Jodi kicked her mother more than once that we know of. Jodi has told the world that her father shoved her into the wall or furniture to the point of her blacking out. Jodi grew pot on the roof of her parents home at the age of 14, something that could have gotten her parents arrested and sent to jail. Jodi stole from her grandparents when they allowed her to live with them. Jodi has forced her parents to deal with financial hardship to support her for her killing of Travis. There are other things as well I am sure.

It always amazes me how there are some people that have never raised a child that believe they know how to do it better than those that have actually raised children themselves. Teaching a child is completely different than having to be responsible for the well being of a child that is with their parents for at least 18 years.

MOO

Well said.

I think the parents get a bad rap. We simply do not truly know enough about Jodi's childhood to know what kind of parents she had. The family, from the outside, seemed normal enough.

The parents get a lot of blame and I believe much of it is unwarranted. If you are of the belief that a little counseling would have helped Jodi then you believe the parents failed her. I am of the belief counseling wouldn't have done much for her, but that's beside the point.

People seem to believe that since Jodi's parents never "got her help" that they must have neglected her or ignored her problems. I believe Jodi's issues probably manifested themselves in a way that made her seem like a problem child. To me, it sounds like the parents were doing the best they could with her with what they could. They were probably not fully aware of what illness or issues she had. They probably thought she was just a problem child and that a little tough love would do her some good. They came from a little town, probably with old fashioned thinking (wooden spoon) and probably thought a little extra discipline would eventually break whatever phase she was going through. So they gave her spankings, called the cops on her pot growing to try to scare the life into her, tried to ground her for 3 months to get through to her. They had no idea what they were dealing with. They had no idea their efforts were futile. Like I said, they tried to parent her with the little knowledge they had of mental illnesses and PDs. It was misguided, sure. They just didn't know. And at some point, they just figured there wasn't much they could do. I think the mother tried even after Jodi left to do SOMETHING. But put yourself in her shoes: what would you do?

But this is not entirely the parents fault and I think it's time to stop beating up on them until we have a full picture.

There is also the idea that the parents must have caused whatever happened in Jodi to happen. Again, this is an assumption and we just don't know enough. Her siblings seem well adjusted enough. And based on what Jodi herself has said when the abuse stories didn't benefit her yet and on what Patti has said when speaking candidly and from what we saw in Jodi's show and tell, Jodi had a pretty good childhood. Sure, that won't tell us much about how much affection they showed Jodi and how much her development had to do with nature vs. nurture. But until we do know more, any criticism towards the parents is unfair.

 

[shelley921]

Yes, as though they were hoping her problems would somehow "go away" : To seek services would have been to admit that they couldn't handle it. Some people see seeking help as failure. Now look what they have to live with. I do not envy them at all.

I know - seeking mental health help is STILL regarded as somehow weak or a failure or shameful when it is actually a sign of STRENGTH. In my own extended family I have seen the tragic results of not seeking help. My brother's 18 year old son killed himself [ almost 5 years ago]. His parents missed all the signs that the poor kid was depressed. And now they have to live with the guilt and pain that will never ever go away. Maybe nothing could have helped this boy but now we will never ever know because no help was ever sought. Tragic.

 

[OEJ]

I ended my comment with IMO - in my opinion - it was not a standard for others.

I had no hope, even tried to commit suicide at the age of 4, asked God in my prayers why I was born because nobody loved me - that gives an indication of how hopeless I was. But then a smile from a stranger in the grocery store changed my life and gave me hope that there is goodness and kindness in the world. It proved that goodness exists in the world.

This is from a small child's POV. I had to find the feeling of safety from within.

I just found it offending when JA blamed her crime on the abuse she allegedly endured as a kid. The survivor-shirts were a mockery to real victims.

IMO

Yes. I remember those precious, important smiles. What life-savers they were!

 

[human]

No, saying that a child is behaving like a brat is not telling the child that it is not their fault.

As a parent (and I am one) you have to do the best that you can when it comes to raising your children. What works for one child more often than not will not work for every other child. There are in fact times when a parent is at the end of their own rope. Even though the parent is the adult does not mean that they have their own issues they must deal with. Every person is raised a certain way and believes that they should or should not raise their own children in a way like they were raised. As a parent if you have a child that is completely out of control and you have other children in the home to consider that can be harmed by the out of control child then there are times when you have to let the out of control child go. If the out of control child decides to move in with her boyfriend to get away from your rules then sometimes the parent must let them go.

No matter what Jodi would have the world believe she did not have an abusive childhood. There is proof of this in the fact that Jodi herself admitted to FAMILY vacations to nice locations. An abusive parent would simply find someone for the child to stay with instead of going on the vacation with the parents. Jodi could have been sent away to live in a home for troubled kids instead of her parents trying to raise her and teach her right from wrong.

Love, caring, respect and concern? Jodi received all of those things. Even as an adult Jodi is receiving those things. But let's look at how she is repaying her parents for those things shall we? Jodi has told the world that her parents abused her. Jodi kicked her mother more than once that we know of. Jodi has told the world that her father shoved her into the wall or furniture to the point of her blacking out. Jodi grew pot on the roof of her parents home at the age of 14, something that could have gotten her parents arrested and sent to jail. Jodi stole from her grandparents when they allowed her to live with them. Jodi has forced her parents to deal with financial hardship to support her for her killing of Travis. There are other things as well I am sure.

It always amazes me how there are some people that have never raised a child that believe they know how to do it better than those that have actually raised children themselves. Teaching a child is completely different than having to be responsible for the well being of a child that is with their parents for at least 18 years.

MOO

Yeah. So far I am still feel responsible for my children who are all successful adults with good jobs inspite of living in a depressed economic area. My grandchildren are all doing way above average. Of course! Once a parent, always a parent.

I can brag more about my kids and grandkids, but I know it makes people get Schaudenfraud, so I will not. I will take credit for how they turned out. I could refer you to their different awards, but it is a problem to remain anonymous.

We all make parenting mistakes. We all could be better parents.

But blaming a child for their bad behavior is not productive for the child or the parent.

I think people who know a family and the child is a problem child, the people are not surprised at all. They see the parents in denial over how the child was treated.

Since when are abused children not taken on vacations or put in institutions by the parents?

Most abused children are taken from the family, unless of course, the parent has killed the child.

Emotional abuse is comsidered to be the most destructive.

My daughter used to work for treatment of civilly commited sex offenders until she could not stomach it anymore. She said rather than them being the vidtims of sex abuse as children, they were the victims of emotional abuse.

But whatever. My kids are all great, so I am going with that, unless I have to give all credit to my hubby.

In teaching hundreds of children and in watching the children my kids grew up with, I do not think that I or any of my friends are surprised at the outcome of the homes of the problem children

 

[2Hip2BSquare]

Ugh the arguing on this thread is getting really painful to read.

We can't we all be here to SHARE theories instread of IMPOSE theories.



Take care guys. Xo

 

[Linda7NJ]

Yeah. So far I am still feel responsible for my children who are all successful adults with good jobs inspite of living in a depressed economic area. My grandchildren are all doing way above average. Once a parent, always a parent.

I can brag more about my kids and grandkids, but I know it makes people get Schaudenfraud, so I will not. I will take credit for how they turned out. I could refer you to their different awards, but it is a problem to remain anonymous.

We all make parenting mistakes. We all could be better parents.

But blaming a child for their bad behavior is not productive for the child or the parent.

I think people who know a family and the child is a problem child, the people are not surprised ar all. They see the parents in denial over how the child was treated.

Since when are abused children not taken on vacations or put in instittutions?

Most abused children are taken from the family, unless of course, the parent has killed the child,

Emotional abuse is comsidered to be the most destructive.

My daughter used to work for treatment of civilly commited sex offenders until she could nkt stomach it anymore. She said rather than them being the vidtims of sex abuse as children, they were the victims of emotional abuse.

But whatever. My kids are all great, so I am going with that, unless I have to give all credit to my hubby,

I feel it's my job as a parent to raise a loving caring productive member of society. I provide everything I possibly can for mine to become independent and successful in life. He's expected to hold up his end. I allow him to make mistakes and suffer the consequences. He works very hard at being the best he can be and I don't take credit for his successes or failures. I stand supportive encouraging and always will.

I'm extremely proud of the young man he has become. The credit is his.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[SMK]

How does one come off as male or female? Sometimes it's easy to tell by the name as to the gender. But how does one come off as a certain sex?

A certain machismo, a certain arrogance.....