Ramsey reaction to JonBenet's death

[JMO8778]

why would it have to be a 9 yo intruder? I'm confused...

 

[lilywhite]

you seem to take what Cyrill Wecht says as gospel. He also believes that Jeffrey MacDonald is innocent and I KNOW Jeffrey MacDonald is 1000% guilty.

Sorry for the off-topic, but what makes you so sure?

You can PM me to avoid hijacking this thread if you like.

 

[k-mac]

Bumping this thread.
Hope it gains some support.
The saturation of this forum with unproductive size 12s andlongjohns is killing off interest aroundhere L
Lets get back into the heart and minds of this family. Becausethere lies the truth…their reality.

 

[singularity]

For years, the biggest puzzle for me has been how the Ramsey's and their extended family have been a cohesive fortress regarding JonBenet's death. You would think a stray cousin or in-law would rock the boat. But nothing even close has happened. Add to this the way this family seemed to be putting this behind them when they walked away from the house that afternoon while JonBenet was still inside. Add to this their cavalier, flippant, and detached attitude over the years regarding JonBenet's death. I can't come up with the adjectives to describe my puzzlement over this.

Fair point but its not really any different than what goes on in other dysfunctional families. These types of families know how to keep secrets or simply not acknowledge anything disturbing. Masks can fly off behind closed doors but when the door opens, the thin facade appears perfect.

Did the family react the way they did because they put the majority of the blame on JonBenet? The root cause of this tragedy in their eyes was her behavior and so the family is just coping the best way they can.


So to sum this up, what happened was unfortunate, but if she hadn't been a handful, she would still be alive today.

Great observation.

I also agree that the "handful" comment was a potential reveal into what happened that night. As the years progress, i think what went on was some kind of domestic dispute that went too far and by labeling her a handful, it might be an attempt at justification for what they did to her and to lessen their own guilt.

The comments coming from the family over the years does indicate that none of them were very fond of her....and yeah....there does appear to be some victim blaming going on.

John has admitted that he doesn't think about her and the tragedy isn't her murder but how they were treated.

He wont be winning any father of the year awards with such statements.

I'm not a diehard PDI, believing the crime to be sexually motivated, but I do think there was real potential for combustion with the scheduling of this holiday...the party going into the evening, driving around dropping off presents until 10 pm, having to pack and leave at the crack of dawn for a vacation.

Yep....a perfect storm of sorts.

They had a hectic few days....and it wasn't about to get any easier.

I look at my own kids at age 6, and they would have been bouncing off the walls after the party..They would not have been asleep in the car. Toddlers sleep in the car...5-6 year olds close their eyes so they can be carried in the house...I believe Burke that she walked in....

I believe him too.

Patsy and John tried to make the world believe she was "zonked" when arriving home. Burke let us know she was awake. Without him speaking up, there's no official story of her walking in the house and up the stairs with Patsy.

I feel sorry for him. I cant even imagine what John and Patsy said or did to him when they found out he did a complete 180 and mentioned her being awake.

I'm hoping he has the courage to break through all the lies and dysfunction and stand up to be the unlikely hero for his little sister after his father dies.

John even said years ago that Burke would have trouble dealing with what happened when he's 40. Interesting how that timeframe would coincide with going past the point of the average life expectancy for John.

It had been so many hours since dinner that the kids likely needed a late night snack. I just don't believe an intruder fed her pineapple. I don't believe anyone went to sleep that night.

I don't believe anyone went to sleep either. Patsy still had packing to do, the kids would've still been on a 'Christmas high", and John may have wanted to have a drink once arriving home.

If some sort of argument broke out on the ride home or once arriving home, they definitely weren't asleep.

She/they may have wanted them to go to sleep but wanting and doing are two different things.

 

[icedtea4me]

*snip*John even said years ago that Burke would have trouble dealing with what happened when he's 40. Interesting how that timeframe would coincide with going past the point of the average life expectancy for John.*snip*

"They keep a lot inside and they don't really start thinking about it until they get to be 40 years old and that's when it hurts."

http://www.acandyrose.com/04032001enquirer.htm

Kind of sounds like he could have been describing Patsy on the night of the murder.

 

[BoldBear]

"They keep a lot inside and they don't really start thinking about it until they get to be 40 years old and that's when it hurts."

http://www.acandyrose.com/04032001enquirer.htm

Kind of sounds like he could have been describing Patsy on the night of the murder.

That's pretty much the age when I started dealing with my childhood--after 40.

I look back on it now and realize that my coping mechanism was to feel sorry for all the things that my mother was going through. I was a textbook example of a caregiver child. My emotions didn't matter. I was going to do everything I could to protect her and make her life easier.

While I don't agree with all conclusions reached in 'The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: A 25 Year Landmark Study' by Julia M. Lewis, the book described who I was fairly well.

This is one of the reasons why Burke's behaviors don't bother me as much. By not showing grief, Burke was becoming as hassle free to his parents as he could. For me, I became rigidly well behaved. My form of acting-out was to not make waves no matter how bad things were for me on the inside. This is a really bad thing for a child. We all get screwed-up in some ways when were growing up, but being responsible for your parent's happiness is impossibly hard. Burke escaped into Legos and gaming consoles. I escaped into very long walks, pinball and (of course) Legos--gaming consoles hadn't come out yet or I would have known Mario Brothers and Zelda like the back of my hand.

I also just finished watching "The Keepers" on Netflix. I find it absolutely astounding how many children repress memories until years and years later. I repressed memories that I had to work through. Even though Burke has had counselling, I'm certain there are many things he has yet to work through. There is a time when you look back and can start to face the monsters you locked away in the back of your mind. Until that time, might I suggest a lot of alcohol and a midlife crisis. They help the time fly.

 

[sgrump]

The Ramsey's reactions to the murder to this day are against the grain. John Ramsey proclaimed he would spend the rest of his life and his fortune hunting down the killer when he has done everything but. Even monetary rewards offered through the years were not from his funds.

Not a single family member has chosen to champion this dead child. Her surviving family has no intentions of looking for the killer because to do so would be a hid and seek game of unparalleled angst.

It doesn't suffice to say you can't judge their reactions because you haven't been in their shoes when thousands if not millions are in those same shoes and true victims DO NOT ACT THAT WAY.