SC - Columbia - Sheriff Slams Female Student to Floor In Class

[vestigare]

She could have put the phone down, do we have any idea why she chose not to? And the cop could have acted saner instead of letting anger win over the situation. I will never understand why violence like this is okay.

True.
We also don't know if she didn't put the phone down.
I can easily see a student using her phone. The teacher flips out, asks her to hand it over, the student says no and puts it in her pocket, the teacher then tells her to leave.
The student then is in a power struggle because she thinks she complied enough by putting the phone away. The teacher thinks she should have not defied her request to hand it over. The student sees no reason to leave the class because it escalated over something she was no longer doing.....

So I am interested in more info before I can even decide if the girl should have been requested to leave in the first place or if this teacher over reacted as well.

I agree either way the cop's behavior was never excusable.

 

[Trident]

In my opinion there should be a home study of this student's living situation.

 

[bluesneakers]

In my opinion there should be a home study of this student's living situation.

JMO but that's nonsense.

The officer's living situation, however...


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[JeannaT]

A power struggle is a no win situation. Challenging her at that point of defiance only escalates the situation. I'm sorry for the cop who lost it as I can understand how he lost it. I dont support a hands on solution to be clear.

I would agree if this were a hostage situation, or a conflict between two country's governments. Taking your time in negotiations, allowing everyone to save face, taking a non-confrontational stance are all things that are very helpful. This is different. This is a school girl, who hopefully will graduate soon. And one of the jobs a school should teach all children is life skills. And one of those life skills is how to behave in society so that you can be successful. This girl, even if she wins a large lawsuit, will never get along in the part of society that is powerful and mainstream if she never learns how to comport herself in the way that the successful community comports themselves.

I mentioned this book earlier, but want to mention it again. "Whatever it Takes", by Paul Tough. It's about a very successful school program in Harlem that teaches academics, but foremost teaches the behaviors that are expected in mainstream American culture, that without them, you will not be successful. You will not. Those skills are taught in the home, or if the kids arrive at school not knowing them, they can be taught in the school. A child who cannot function better than that is not prepared to go out and make her way in the world.

 

[JeannaT]

In my opinion there should be a home study of this student's living situation.

My guess is, there has been. From different articles, she had just recently moved there and had "no one", and I haven't seen anything at all about her parents. My guess (just a guess) is that she is living in foster care or some similar situation. This is not the behavior of a student who comes from a supportive mainstream family. I'm really glad that her name hasn't been released and I hope she continues to enjoy this privacy throughout this situation until it is resolved -

 

[vestigare]

In my opinion there should be a home study of this student's living situation.

There should be a home study of every adult who watched that happen and didn't stop the child abuse.

 

[Margo/Mom]

I would agree if this were a hostage situation, or a conflict between two country's governments. Taking your time in negotiations, allowing everyone to save face, taking a non-confrontational stance are all things that are very helpful. This is different. This is a school girl, who hopefully will graduate soon. And one of the jobs a school should teach all children is life skills. And one of those life skills is how to behave in society so that you can be successful. This girl, even if she wins a large lawsuit, will never get along in the part of society that is powerful and mainstream if she never learns how to comport herself in the way that the successful community comports themselves.

I mentioned this book earlier, but want to mention it again. "Whatever it Takes", by Paul Tough. It's about a very successful school program in Harlem that teaches academics, but foremost teaches the behaviors that are expected in mainstream American culture, that without them, you will not be successful. You will not. Those skills are taught in the home, or if the kids arrive at school not knowing them, they can be taught in the school. A child who cannot function better than that is not prepared to go out and make her way in the world.

Imagine if the same teacher were addressing a group of peers in some professional development session. As often happens, an audience member is rudely tuned out an consulting phone messages. Can you possibly imagine that teacher demanding that the person turn over their phone? Demanding that they leave the room? And then calling in armed personnel to remove them should they refuse?

Sorry, folks. This was not about teaching anyone "life skills." It was about a ticked off adult throwing his weight around. And when he lacked the personal power to get his own way, he called in reinforcements. This had nothing to do with teaching anything.

As a parent, I tended to counsel my kids in the direction of understanding the teacher's point of view, that the teacher cannot see everything than happens (and sometimes therefore tags the innocent along with the guilty) and that the teacher has a job to do. Also push hard on toning down attitude in conflict situations and recognizing where the power lies in order to stay out of trouble. But, as an educator, I would strongly suggest that the teacher made some bad choices, compounded by an administrator who inappropriately defined what looks like a very quiet act of defiance as a classroom disruption--using that as an excuse to call in security. No one--prior to the entry of the SRO--was endangered in that classroom. From the insular reactions of the students on film, it would appear as though no one was even disrupted by the initial incident, or the refusal to leave.

Again--this was not about teaching, life skills or anything else. It was about adults establishing their superior power base. Congratulations--big guys won.

 

[JeannaT]

The sheriff intends to announce his decision today about the fate of the deputy. I really like this sheriff, and trust him.

http://www.kvue.com/story/news/loca...high-student-deputy-incident-update/74700470/

 

[Margo/Mom]

My guess is, there has been. From different articles, she had just recently moved there and had "no one", and I haven't seen anything at all about her parents. My guess (just a guess) is that she is living in foster care or some similar situation. This is not the behavior of a student who comes from a supportive mainstream family. I'm really glad that her name hasn't been released and I hope she continues to enjoy this privacy throughout this situation until it is resolved -

Beg to differ. I have known a wide range of kids from a wide range of home experiences. I have certainly seen this same behavior in the homes of well-to-do professionals (so-called "good" parents) and single parent low income homes (the ones we always suspect of being inadequate). Pushing limits--it's pretty much what adolescence is all about.

 

[Trident]

Imagine if the same teacher were addressing a group of peers in some professional development session. As often happens, an audience member is rudely tuned out an consulting phone messages. Can you possibly imagine that teacher demanding that the person turn over their phone? Demanding that they leave the room? And then calling in armed personnel to remove them should they refuse?

Sorry, folks. This was not about teaching anyone "life skills." It was about a ticked off adult throwing his weight around. And when he lacked the personal power to get his own way, he called in reinforcements. This had nothing to do with teaching anything.

As a parent, I tended to counsel my kids in the direction of understanding the teacher's point of view, that the teacher cannot see everything than happens (and sometimes therefore tags the innocent along with the guilty) and that the teacher has a job to do. Also push hard on toning down attitude in conflict situations and recognizing where the power lies in order to stay out of trouble. But, as an educator, I would strongly suggest that the teacher made some bad choices, compounded by an administrator who inappropriately defined what looks like a very quiet act of defiance as a classroom disruption--using that as an excuse to call in security. No one--prior to the entry of the SRO--was endangered in that classroom. From the insular reactions of the students on film, it would appear as though no one was even disrupted by the initial incident, or the refusal to leave.

Again--this was not about teaching, life skills or anything else. It was about adults establishing their superior power base. Congratulations--big guys won.

And so it should be. Adults are running a school for many children - this isn't a playground. When will people understand the inmates should NOT be running the asylum?

 

[Confusion]

Not to speak for Kaboom, but the 'she' who is dead was a hypothetical 'she'.

And I agree with the general argument that some people appear to defend LEOs no matter how damning the evidence is against them, but I'm not willing to re-read so many posts to find them (and many of those threads are locked and gathering dust, now).

Sandra Bland?

 

[bluesneakers]

Imagine if the same teacher were addressing a group of peers in some professional development session. As often happens, an audience member is rudely tuned out an consulting phone messages. Can you possibly imagine that teacher demanding that the person turn over their phone? Demanding that they leave the room? And then calling in armed personnel to remove them should they refuse?

Sorry, folks. This was not about teaching anyone "life skills." It was about a ticked off adult throwing his weight around. And when he lacked the personal power to get his own way, he called in reinforcements. This had nothing to do with teaching anything.

As a parent, I tended to counsel my kids in the direction of understanding the teacher's point of view, that the teacher cannot see everything than happens (and sometimes therefore tags the innocent along with the guilty) and that the teacher has a job to do. Also push hard on toning down attitude in conflict situations and recognizing where the power lies in order to stay out of trouble. But, as an educator, I would strongly suggest that the teacher made some bad choices, compounded by an administrator who inappropriately defined what looks like a very quiet act of defiance as a classroom disruption--using that as an excuse to call in security. No one--prior to the entry of the SRO--was endangered in that classroom. From the insular reactions of the students on film, it would appear as though no one was even disrupted by the initial incident, or the refusal to leave.

Again--this was not about teaching, life skills or anything else. It was about adults establishing their superior power base. Congratulations--big guys won.

Post of the day. Thank you.
:tyou:

 

[Bravo]

My post upthread was speaking to "in the moment" of escalating tension. The aftermath can be dealt with later. I use CPI many times in my work when faced with a violent client. It does work. I can say in 33 years I have never been injured. Consequences can be dealt with later.

 

[JeannaT]

Beg to differ. I have known a wide range of kids from a wide range of home experiences. I have certainly seen this same behavior in the homes of well-to-do professionals (so-called "good" parents) and single parent low income homes (the ones we always suspect of being inadequate). Pushing limits--it's pretty much what adolescence is all about.

I think I've been misunderstood. Parents from all walks of life can teach acceptable social skills. I have never seen "good parents" tell their children they approve of this kind of lack of respect for authority in a situation like this, whatever their income level is.

 

[JeannaT]

My post upthread was speaking to "in the moment" of escalating tension. The aftermath can be dealt with later. I use CPI many times in my work when faced with a violent client. It does work. I can say in 33 years I have never been injured. Consequences can be dealt with later.

Me too. I've been trained in CPI also, from working at MHMR. The difference is, your main goal in that situation is to keep everyone from becoming injured. There is no expectation in that situation of teaching mainstream skills because that's not what you're doing. You're maintaining an atmosphere where no one gets injured. That's the whole goal. A "client" has a different relationship with the situation, and a different expected out come, than a senior in high school who is expected to be able to perform at a reasonable level of social gracefulness.

 

[bluesneakers]

I think I've been misunderstood. Parents from all walks of life can teach acceptable social skills. I have never seen "good parents" tell their children they approve of this kind of lack of respect for authority in a situation like this, whatever their income level is.

And by good you mean supportive and "mainstream." What exactly is a "mainstream" family?


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[vestigare]

Beg to differ. I have known a wide range of kids from a wide range of home experiences. I have certainly seen this same behavior in the homes of well-to-do professionals (so-called "good" parents) and single parent low income homes (the ones we always suspect of being inadequate). Pushing limits--it's pretty much what adolescence is all about.

Agree.

I think a lot of this requirement for total compliance and requiring children to not think for themselves is because parents are too wrapped up in their public image as parents. people are so quick to assume a child must have bad parents if they do anything at all outside what they deem acceptable.

IMO parents sgould step back and realize every child is an individual regardless of parenting.

 

[JeannaT]

And by good you mean supportive and "mainstream." What exactly is a "mainstream" family?


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That's a good question. I think the overriding factor, in a "mainstream" family is they view themselves as being a part of the fabric of the community. They want to be a positive influence on the community, in whatever form that takes, and believe that their presence is positive. Nonmainstream families believe the opposite - that they have no stake in the community, the community is against them, and have no desire to be successful and positive in the eyes of the community. In those families or individuals, there is no goal to contribute because they think the community as a whole has no value at all. And that leads to lawlessness and destructiveness.

 

[Bravo]

Me too. I've been trained in CPI also, from working at MHMR. The difference is, your main goal in that situation is to keep everyone from becoming injured. There is no expectation in that situation of teaching mainstream skills because that's not what you're doing. You're maintaining an atmosphere where no one gets injured. That's the whole goal. A "client" has a different relationship with the situation, and a different expected out come, than a senior in high school who is expected to be able to perform at a reasonable level of social gracefulness.

I agree yet again diffuse the situation and deal with the student when everything is calm.

 

[bluesneakers]

That's a good question. I think the overriding factor, in a "mainstream" family is they view themselves as being a part of the fabric of the community. They want to be a positive influence on the community, in whatever form that takes, and believe that their presence is positive. Nonmainstream families believe the opposite - that they have no stake in the community, the community is against them, and have no desire to be successful and positive in the eyes of the community. In those families or individuals, there is no goal to contribute because they think the community as a whole has no value at all. And that leads to lawlessness and destructiveness.

Who are these families? How would I recognize one of them?


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