Smiles Cafe

[CocoChanel]

Wish I could give credit to the source here, but it was copied from a friend who had copied it to her page on Facebook. It made me laugh out loud, seriously!


After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet" which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS pilots ("P") and solutions recorded ("S") by maintenance engineers:

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to: straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget

 

[Laughing]

Can't come anywhere near CocoChanel's list!!!

 

[Niner]

 

[Laughing]

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Niner! Get out of my closet!!! Please?

 

[Niner]

Niner! Get out of my closet!!! Please?

Ok - I might be a bit slow.... but I don't understand.... Are you talking about the jeans I pulled out of there?

 

[Laughing]

Ok - I might be a bit slow.... but I don't understand.... Are you talking about the jeans I pulled out of there?

Yes, and please put them back in order, okay, because they were carefully sorted by poundage when you snuck in.

BTW you will not get rid of all the 'Corgi hair,' not ever, and that's OK:

 

[Niner]

Yes, and please put them back in order, okay, because they were carefully sorted by poundage when you snuck in.

BTW you will not get rid of all the 'Corgi hair,' not ever, and that's OK:

 

[weepingangel]

I found this article to be (multiple) smile worthy
The Surprising History of Sesame Street's Prairie Dawn

 

[anneg]

I found this article to be (multiple) smile worthy
The Surprising History of Sesame Street's Prairie Dawn

I enjoyed the article and videos! Thanks.

 

[PayrollNerd]

I have selective movement most days.... LOL!

 

[dixiegirl1035]

 

[ivegotthemic]

 

[ivegotthemic]

I meant to include this with my previous post, this is the puzzle reviewed above lol. As per usual I'm sharing the finished masterpiece that I've somehow managed to lose 1 piece of (its an art form losing a single piece of every puzzle). Hope everyone is remembering to practice self-care during the pandemic! I'd love to see everyone else version of it (coloring, crafts, cooking, whatever you do to relax that's WS appropriate lol)

 

[Niner]

Since you asked @ivegotthemic ....

I color during commercials when watching football.
Before:


After:


Before:


After:

 

[Niner]

and finally found some Covid related funnies!

 

[BetteDavisEyes]

I meant to include this with my previous post, this is the puzzle reviewed above lol. As per usual I'm sharing the finished masterpiece that I've somehow managed to lose 1 piece of (its an art form losing a single piece of every puzzle). Hope everyone is remembering to practice self-care during the pandemic! I'd love to see everyone else version of it (coloring, crafts, cooking, whatever you do to relax that's WS appropriate lol)

When DD was growing up, we always had a large jigsaw puzzle on the coffee table in our family room. The three of us would do a few pieces just about every day, and anyone who came to our home would do a few pieces until, eventually, the puzzle got finished. We'd take it apart, put the pieces back in the box, and donate the puzzles to the local library.

I do several word puzzles every day. I like to bake and cook, and I read incessantly. I'm also a classic movie fan and try to watch at least one "old" movie daily. Thank you for reminding us to take care of ourselves during this pandemic

 

[ivegotthemic]

Since you asked @ivegotthemic ....

I color during commercials when watching football.
Before:
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After:
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Before:
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After:
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WOW!!!!!!!!! these are amazing! I tried to get into coloring but it turns out not being good at coloring while trying to color to relax made me more stressed then not coloring at all lol you must have 1. Incredible patience and 2. A very steady hand! Not going to lie these are 150% fridge worthy! Thank you for sharing your master pieces

 

[Niner]

WOW!!!!!!!!! these are amazing! I tried to get into coloring but it turns out not being good at coloring while trying to color to relax made me more stressed then not coloring at all lol you must have 1. Incredible patience and 2. A very steady hand! Not going to lie these are 150% fridge worthy! Thank you for sharing your master pieces

Thank you! Yes, a very steady hand and very sharp colored pencils!

 

[JudgeJoe]

WOW!!!!!!!!! these are amazing! I tried to get into coloring but it turns out not being good at coloring while trying to color to relax made me more stressed then not coloring at all lol you must have 1. Incredible patience and 2. A very steady hand! Not going to lie these are 150% fridge worthy! Thank you for sharing your master pieces

Thank you! Yes, a very steady hand and very sharp colored pencils!

Let us not forget to add great eyesight. I’d go blind!

 

[Laughing]

Three smiles!

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