South Hadley,MA Phoebe Prince 15 kills self over bullying

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  • #581
When District Attorney Elizabeth Scheibel charged the nine teens in late March, she said that Phoebe had endured a three-month campaign of bullying that was "common knowledge" among the students at the high school. She also said that "the investigation has revealed that certain faculty, staff, and administrators of the high school also were alerted to the harassment of Phoebe Prince before her death." Boisselle and Superintendent Gus Sayer have responded with what looks from the outside like a completely tone-deaf series of scoffs and denials. "Did they go interview all 700 kids at the school and found out that more than 300 knew about it? Isn't that the only way you could tell that they factually knew about it?" Boisselle asked in the Boston Herald. In print interviews and on CNN, Sayer has stuck to the oddly unapologetic line that the high school did all it could for Phoebe. Administrators and teachers just didn't really know or understand what was going on. "The kids have a way of communicating with each other without us knowing about it,'' he said. "They really have their own world."

This is meant as a defense, rather than an admission of lameness, even though after a suicide you'd think that the school would do some soul searching about why administrators, teachers, and guidance counselors didn't fully comprehend what was happening to a vulnerable student. This professed ignorance is also factually at odds with the account of Phoebe's mother, who has said she asked the school in November whether kids were threatening her daughter and then went back to talk to school officials about Phoebe in the first week of January. Sayer's claim also doesn't line up with the accounts of students who I've talked to. They say they saw Phoebe standing outside a classroom in tears and heard her crying in the nurse's office the day she died, as some students also told the New York Times.

Luke Gelinas, a parent who has called for the resignation of Sayer and Principal Dan Smith, told me he met with Sayer last Friday morning. "I told him I'd heard from Darby O'Brien, the spokesman for the Prince family, that during the intake process in September, when Phoebe was brought to the school, it was made known to them that she was prone to bullying and that she should have regular counseling and checkups to make sure she's OK. Sayer confirmed that for me. But no counselors reached out to her until three months later." This hasn't been reported elsewhere, so I called Sayer's office to check on it. I haven't heard back.

http://www.slate.com/id/2249867/
 
  • #582
I went away for the weekend and I see everyone has been oh ...so busy and Phoebe has her own little place in the sun.
 
  • #583
Luke Gelinas, a parent who has called for the resignation of Sayer and Principal Dan Smith, told me he met with Sayer last Friday morning. "I told him I'd heard from Darby O'Brien, the spokesman for the Prince family, that during the intake process in September, when Phoebe was brought to the school, it was made known to them that she was prone to bullying and that she should have regular counseling and checkups to make sure she's OK. Sayer confirmed that for me. But no counselors reached out to her until three months later." This hasn't been reported elsewhere, so I called Sayer's office to check on it. I haven't heard back.
http://www.slate.com/id/2249867/

respectfully snipped from post...more questions around "counseling"...
 
  • #584
"prone to bullying"..what does THAT mean?

That Phoebe was a bully herself? Or that she attracted bullying toward herself?

Poor choice of words.
 
  • #585
"prone to bullying"..what does THAT mean?

That Phoebe was a bully herself? Or that she attracted bullying toward herself?

I would guess she attracted bullying toward herself. We certainly have seen no reports suggesting she was bullying anyone. How well was she doing in Ireland's school? Do we know anything about that?
 
  • #586
I would guess she attracted bullying toward herself. We certainly have seen no reports suggesting she was bullying anyone. How well was she doing in Ireland's school? Do we know anything about that?

Jenny, I've read a number of articles that say she was very well liked. She attended a private school in Ireland. I'll try to find some links for you.
 
  • #587
I would guess she attracted bullying toward herself. We certainly have seen no reports suggesting she was bullying anyone. How well was she doing in Ireland's school? Do we know anything about that?

How the heck does anyone "attract bullying" toward themselves??? Please, with respect I ask, explain that to me.
 
  • #588
How the heck does anyone "attract bullying" toward themselves??? Please, with respect I ask, explain that to me.

Why don't you contact slate.com and ask them what exactly they meant by "prone to bullying" and then report it back to us?
 
  • #589
"prone to bullying"..what does THAT mean?

That Phoebe was a bully herself? Or that she attracted bullying toward herself?
IMO maybe that she was a sensitive kid who had been hurt by bullying previously...it implies to me, she had been a victim before, in some sense. Not surprising to me. The meek traditionally get eaten by the strong in our cruel society, imo...vulnerbility, they seem to sniff it out when they pick their victims...
 
  • #590
Everything I've read sounds like she did very well with other kids in Ireland. She went to a well-respected boarding school.

From this page:

[Her father] is remembered as a real green-fingers phenomenon, a man who made a living in good times and tough times. Anne became a schoolteacher locally and her kids. Her four girls and a boy were well-liked, well-mannered kids.

Phoebe went to school in the exclusive Villiers college in nearby Limerick. She is remembered there as a warm, outgoing girl popular in a coed boarding school environment where fast friends were made for life.

Villiers has a Protestant ethos and is fee-paying. The student body is multi-denominational and diverse, including students from Spain, Mexico, South Africa, Germany and Russia.

It is a nursery for many distinguished former pupils including politician Jan O'Sullivan. It has a unique reputation as a nurturing environment. Phoebe thrived there.


Just judging by the fact that the S.Hadley bullies were despicable enough to post ugly things online about her the day she died, and the obscene and contradictory excuse making by school officials and the one parent, I'm convinced that they were the source of the problem - not Phoebe.
 
  • #591
Everything I've read sounds like she did very well with other kids in Ireland. She went to a well-respected boarding school.

From this page:

[Her father] is remembered as a real green-fingers phenomenon, a man who made a living in good times and tough times. Anne became a schoolteacher locally and her kids. Her four girls and a boy were well-liked, well-mannered kids.

Phoebe went to school in the exclusive Villiers college in nearby Limerick. She is remembered there as a warm, outgoing girl popular in a coed boarding school environment where fast friends were made for life.

Villiers has a Protestant ethos and is fee-paying. The student body is multi-denominational and diverse, including students from Spain, Mexico, South Africa, Germany and Russia.

It is a nursery for many distinguished former pupils including politician Jan O'Sullivan. It has a unique reputation as a nurturing environment. Phoebe thrived there.


Just judging by the fact that the S.Hadley bullies were despicable enough to post ugly things online about her the day she died, and the obscene and contradictory excuse making by school officials and the one parent, I'm convinced that they were the source of the problem - not Phoebe.

And even if she did have a problem before...it means nothing. SHE is not responsible for her victimization, the perps are. IMO
 
  • #592
Why don't you contact slate.com and ask them what exactly they meant by "prone to bullying" and then report it back to us?

A dose of uncalled for sarcasm. Good grief....
 
  • #593
Maybe they are confused in that article. They seem to be quoting a Man, quoting Darby O'Brien...something may have gotten lost in translation...
 
  • #594
I'd guess all kids who are new to a country and school are prone to being bullied. So it could have simply meant they should take care that she felt welcome instead of shunned, as a child from another country coming to a small school in a tightly knit community, after spending her life among close friends.

It would be a wise thing to watch out for her, imo. Changing schools is hard, even for kids experienced with it and surrounded by other shuffled kids, like those with parents in the military. It would be especially tough on a 14 year old girl.
 
  • #595
How the heck does anyone "attract bullying" toward themselves??? Please, with respect I ask, explain that to me.

They don't "attract bullying", imo. Perps sniff out vulnerbility. We see it in many cases. Be it a small child, an open window, an inattentive Mother, a meek person...they are predators, imo.
 
  • #596
It could have simply meant they should take care that she felt welcome instead of shunned, as a child from another country coming to a small school in a tightly knit community, after spending her life among close friends.

It would be a wise thing to watch out for her, imo. Changing schools is hard, even for kids experienced with it and surrounded by other shuffled kids, like those with parents in the military. It would be especially tough on a 14 year old girl.

I don't think "prone to bullying" would be use unless she had some issues with bullying in the past. Assuming of course the report is correct and the school was actually warned she was "prone to bullying."
 
  • #597
Bullying can come in so many ways/directions. We have even seen it here very recently and we are adults. As adults, we can take it from the whatever source it comes from. I know I do. There is no peer pressure nor do we have to prove ourself to anyone. For a teen of 15, just place yourself where they are at that age. This is not like our days of way back when. It has been taken up a notch. Somewhere, these "children" never learned compassion, empathy, or even guilt of actions. Add in the transition flux of growing into yourself and that struggle. I do not believe Ms Prince was incapable of dealing. I think she was beyond slammed by stronger abusive forces she had never experienced before.
 
  • #598
respectfully snipped from post...more questions around "counseling"...

"Many of the girl’s shocked and mourning peers believe that the teen was bullied, Sayer said.

“She was having some difficulty adjusting to the new school and she was getting help with that,” Sayer said, referring to counseling Prince was getting. “I am very reluctant to speculate why she did what she did.”

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2010/01/south_hadley_high_school_stude.html
 
  • #599
I don't think "prone to bullying" would be use unless she had some issues with bullying in the past. Assuming of course the report is correct and the school was actually warned she was "prone to bullying."

I can't say for sure why they said it, but since all kids who are new to a country and school are prone to being bullied, and schools should be alerted to watch for it, I wouldn't assume "prone to bullying" meant anything more than just that - at least not until I had some information to contradict all the reports that she was happy and well-liked in Ireland.

Either way, I'm not inclined to see any of this as a problem with her, but with her abusers. Nor am I inclined to look for excuses for them. YMMV
 
  • #600
"Many of the girl’s shocked and mourning peers believe that the teen was bullied, Sayer said.

“She was having some difficulty adjusting to the new school and she was getting help with that,” Sayer said, referring to counseling Prince was getting. “I am very reluctant to speculate why she did what she did.”

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2010/01/south_hadley_high_school_stude.html

It sounds like she started getting counseling a short time before she killed herself.
 
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