Teen sues family over alleged abortion threat

  • #21
I'm still having a hard time with this one. Here's why.

Legally, this girl is a child. Physically, she is still a child in large part.

But, she made the adult choice to have sex. She made the adult choice that she wants to keep this child. She consulted a lawyer, found advocates, and took this to court, instead of screaming "I hate you!" and locking herself in her room or running away. She told her family relatively early in the pregnancy, otherwise abortion would not even be a viable option. She is willing to fight for this child, lose her family over this child, and put herself through a court battle for this child. At 14. In other words, she's already a better mother than half the parents that end up on WS.

On the other hand, she's 14. There goes her childhood.

However, if she's one of those kids like I was, she doesn't give one whit about her childhood. I just wanted mine over. I moved out at 15, worked 3 jobs, and started my family at 16. This girl is at the very least VERY resourceful. There is nothing saying that she can't finish school online, get her GED instead, or find a special center that will allow her to have the child in class or provide child care. All viable options if she is willing to look for them. Just the fact that she has gotten to this point in the court battle tells me that she would look and she would find them.

Most states divide teens and young adults into categories: people under 13, people between 13 and 16, and those between 16 and 18 or the legal age of consent, which in some states is 16. Meaning that the baby's father is likely anywhere between 14 and 16, if no crime has been committed. He can work. So can she, most places at 14 or 15, with a work permit, which isn't that hard to get as a teen mother (been there, done that.) Special dispensations are sometimes made for licenses, like for kids that have a parent with a medical issue. My sister got her driver's license at 14 because her birth mom is blind, and someone had to be able to drive her to appointments. If special permission will not be granted, many insurance companies offer transportation to doctor's appointments for babies and expectant mothers, and then there's always the bus, if neither of the above options work.

Honestly, due to her family's reaction, I would like to see this girl placed in independent living through the state. All states have these programs, specialized foster care homes that are used for kids about to age out or about to have their children. She can gain any life skills that she may be missing, and she would have some of the family pressure off. She would be able to make her own decision, truly her own, as to whether or not to raise this baby or not. It seems her mind is made up when it comes to whether or not to have it.

I still don't know what I think, fully.
 
  • #22
The only thing that I am sure of is I don't think she should be made to get an abortion - as I am Pro Choice for adults decisions on this. Is this young girl old enough and mature enough to take on the responsibility of raising a child? Probably not at this point, but we don't really know all of the circumstances. Are there no longer Homes for Unwed Mothers? This would give her a safe place where she and prenatal care would be taken care of along with possibly classes for school. Down the line, a court may decide she is not able to care for a baby at this time and place the baby in the kind of foster care where she can visit and nurture their bond until she is able.

I think there are wonderful foster parents who really want to take care of children and shelter them until they can be with birth parents. If that never happens, then the adoption process can begin. We have wonderful Foster's here, are there circumstances where both the mother and baby are taken in and kept together?
 
  • #23
SBM and BBM
They had been taking care of the 14 year old..why didn't they have proper supervision of her to prevent this happening to begin with? If they knew she was sexually active they could at least have provided her with birth control. But their only reaction is to make the situation worse by abusing her.
I'm not about to place blame on the adults that was raising this child for the adult decision she made to have sex. I mean really! You cannot be with your child 24/7 and for all we know they gave her the tools she needed and tried to supervise and control things like this in her life.
Thankful I didn't have to deal with this with my children but if I had I would have hated to have been blamed.
Some kids just have to live it to learn it unfortunately.

Where is her parents?

ETA I don't think anyone should be able to force anyone to have an abortion!

MOO
 
  • #24
One more thing. I did ask an attorney (now retired) who practiced in TX until two years ago, and he said that the only way they can legally force her to have an abortion is if her life is in danger and the abortion is medically recommended. That is the only time that parental control overrides reproductive rights. That said, of course, there might have been a change in the laws, or he could be mistaken, as this was not his area of expertise, but it makes me wonder exactly how this all got to the court stage if they cannot legally force her anyway.

By the way, google Texas Teen + forced + abortion, and there is at least one story a year like this. Seems that this fight is nothing new, but raises the question of how it even needs a court injunction if guardians can't force an abortion in the first place.

http://www.tcdl.org/2011/12/family-stopped-from-forcing-texas-teen-to-have-abortion/
This is a biased article put out by the group that is helping her. She has only recently turned 14, meaning that she was 13 when she got pregnant. She was 7 weeks along earlier this month, so I'm guesstimating that she would be about 9-10 weeks pregnant currently. This link also adds that her family has not been allowing her to attend school. How is she even still in their custody?

At least a GAL was appointed for her earlier this month and they will be back in court soon.

Again a hearing is set for the January 19 when Judge Medary will decide whether to continue to enforce the temporary restraining order or withdraw it. In the meantime, the TRO prohibits the family members of the girl not to coerce, threaten or try to convince the girl into having an abortion.
http://www.kiiitv.com/story/16449008/parents-want-to-force-teen-to-have-an-abortion
 
  • #25
One more thing. I did ask an attorney (now retired) who practiced in TX until two years ago, and he said that the only way they can legally force her to have an abortion is if her life is in danger and the abortion is medically recommended. That is the only time that parental control overrides reproductive rights. That said, of course, there might have been a change in the laws, or he could be mistaken, as this was not his area of expertise, but it makes me wonder exactly how this all got to the court stage if they cannot legally force her anyway.

By the way, google Texas Teen + forced + abortion, and there is at least one story a year like this. Seems that this fight is nothing new, but raises the question of how it even needs a court injunction if guardians can't force an abortion in the first place.

http://www.tcdl.org/2011/12/family-stopped-from-forcing-texas-teen-to-have-abortion/
This is a biased article put out by the group that is helping her. She has only recently turned 14, meaning that she was 13 when she got pregnant. She was 7 weeks along earlier this month, so I'm guesstimating that she would be about 9-10 weeks pregnant currently. This link also adds that her family has not been allowing her to attend school. How is she even still in their custody?

At least a GAL was appointed for her earlier this month and they will be back in court soon.

Again a hearing is set for the January 19 when Judge Medary will decide whether to continue to enforce the temporary restraining order or withdraw it. In the meantime, the TRO prohibits the family members of the girl not to coerce, threaten or try to convince the girl into having an abortion.
http://www.kiiitv.com/story/16449008/parents-want-to-force-teen-to-have-an-abortion

From what I gather, what they lawyer is saying to you is accurate. The parents or guardians can't force her to have an abortion against her will, unless there is a danger to her life if she doesn't have it (which doesn't appear to be a case here). So the safe bet here is that she won't be having an abortion. Could she raise the child at 14 without family's support is another story entirely.
 
  • #26
I too am pro-Choice and the term means exactly what it says. I wish a 14-year-old were not faced with this choice, but she is and it is hers to make.

Once the baby is born, however, I'm not sure the 14-year-old can force her grandparents to raise the child. The teen mother may no longer have a choice and may have to put the baby up for adoption.
 
  • #27
If the girl doesn't agree to an adoption, I really hope the GAL will recommend foster care placement/custody by the state. Especially after I read above that the other relatives wouldn't even allow her to go to school it's obvious they have no interest in what is her best interest, or the baby's. In the state I worked, they allowed a minor mother and child to go into foster care together.

Someone also mentioned her being declared independent and allowed to live on her own which is also possible but due to her age and having a baby alone I would just feel better about it if she had supervision and assistance with the child for the first year or two.
 
  • #28
I don't get how a 14yo can choose to abort, but can't choose NOT to. :waitasec:
 
  • #29
My daughter had her first baby at 15 and her 2nd at 16. She put the babies in day care while she was in school. Unfortunately the 2nd baby, a beautiful, blond, blue eyed girl died of SIDS at the age of 3 months. My daughter married the father of her children and they got their own mobile home where they lived until after their 3rd baby was born, when my daughter's husband went into the army and they had to move to Texas, and they had a 4th child.. My daughter graduated from high school early and went to college for 2 years. She and the father of her children divorced after about 10 years or so. My daughter moved back to our area and had another child (4 live children now). Her daughter she had at 15 graduates from high school this year with all A grades and has earned a 4 year full ride scholarship to college and has been accepted at about 10 colleges. She is a beautiful and sweet girl, very intelligent with many talents. No way would I have wanted her aborted or adopted out! We are very blessed that our daughter wanted to keep her and raise her with the baby's father.
 
  • #30
I cant even beleve people considering letting the 14 yr old child give birth. Maybe because I have a 14 yr old. I just cant wrap my mind arround it.

I am pro choice , but it is an adult choice. One that to too huge for any 14 yr old girl.

I do think it is her parents right to make it for her. JMO.
 
  • #31
I too am pro-Choice and the term means exactly what it says. I wish a 14-year-old were not faced with this choice, but she is and it is hers to make.

Once the baby is born, however, I'm not sure the 14-year-old can force her grandparents to raise the child. The teen mother may no longer have a choice and may have to put the baby up for adoption.

In my state - Missouri, grandparents can be held financially responsible for a grandchild born to their minor child. For example if your child is in state custody and gets pregnant the state can order you to pay child support for your child and grandchild. The same goes for ex-spouses ordered to pay support. I don't know if it's actually enforced much, but the law is on the books.
 
  • #32
I cant even beleve people considering letting the 14 yr old child give birth. Maybe because I have a 14 yr old. I just cant wrap my mind arround it.

I am pro choice , but it is an adult choice. One that to too huge for any 14 yr old girl.

I do think it is her parents right to make it for her. JMO.

Her parents are guardians don't have a legal right to make this choice for her.
So she will not be forced to have an abortion.
 
  • #33
Maybe she will land her own reality TV show and we can all celebrate her choice to keep her baby and force her grandparents / parents to raise it.
 
  • #34
Maybe she will land her own reality TV show and we can all celebrate her choice to keep her baby and force her grandparents / parents to raise it.

I don't think the parents are even raising the girl herself.
 
  • #35
Ps.. can she sue her own family for an abortion they (obviously) didn't force her to have?? If this kid lived with me, she'd be looking for another place to sleep.
 
  • #36
I don't think the parents are even raising the girl herself.

SOMEONE is putting a roof over her head, no? She's suing her family.
 
  • #37
My daughter had her first baby at 15 and her 2nd at 16. She put the babies in day care while she was in school. Unfortunately the 2nd baby, a beautiful, blond, blue eyed girl died of SIDS at the age of 3 months. My daughter married the father of her children and they got their own mobile home where they lived until after their 3rd baby was born, when my daughter's husband went into the army and they had to move to Texas, and they had a 4th child.. My daughter graduated from high school early and went to college for 2 years. She and the father of her children divorced after about 10 years or so. My daughter moved back to our area and had another child (4 live children now). Her daughter she had at 15 graduates from high school this year with all A grades and has earned a 4 year full ride scholarship to college and has been accepted at about 10 colleges. She is a beautiful and sweet girl, very intelligent with many talents. No way would I have wanted her aborted or adopted out! We are very blessed that our daughter wanted to keep her and raise her with the baby's father.

Wonderful, but 99% of the time life doesn't turn out like that for the teenage mother or the children of teen parents.
MOO
 
  • #38
Maybe she will land her own reality TV show and we can all celebrate her choice to keep her baby and force her grandparents / parents to raise it.

And it will be called HA HA HA or Nananana boo boo
 
  • #39
Wonderful, but 99% of the time life doesn't turn out like that for the teenage mother or the children of teen parents.
MOO

The 14 year old doesn't have to raise the child. She could give the child up for adoption, which I frankly hope she does.
 
  • #40
The 14 year old doesn't have to raise the child. She could give the child up for adoption, which I frankly hope she does.

I agree with you, but i have a feeling she will not do that MOO
 

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