Anybody ever gotten "Drunker 'an Cootie Brown?"
And who the heck is Cootie Brown anyway?
AND
Back home, whenever we were out riding mud buggies/four-wheelers and a guy needed to...err..."use the little boys' room," he'd point in one direction and yell, "Look! There's Elvis!" Which meant we were to look in THAT direction while he went to "tinkle" in the other direction!
(Yes, I have redneck blood in me...though neither side of my family will claim it. Must have been a "redneck in the woodpile?")