TN - Gail Nowacki Palmgren, 44, Signal Mountain, 30 April 2011 - #5

[believe09]

For me Arlene’s article only made me more concerned about a thought which I have had that another poster was brave enough to post albeit while waving a white flag.

I see the evidence of the possibility of suicide.

I can think that would be a reason that privacy would be protected- for Gail’s sake, for the children’s sake.

IF,IF,IF she had a made a comment, even to MP, that might lead anyone to think that it might be indication she might hurt herself then it is most defiantly a private family matter.

I am unsettled about GP calling while at the lake home saying she was scared and wanted Adele to pick her up.

http://www.chattanoogan.com/articles/article_203035.asp



Not me and the children?

Personally my first words back would have been of what? MP? Did GP not tell Adele that SM LE had been called over the separate car issue?

Why did GP not call the Wetumka police and get an RO if she was afraid?

Why make plans to have the talk with the children together the next weekend in that same location?

I think she was afraid for herself of herself.

A very sensitive and emotional point of a very, very difficult situation:



A MSM first person report that GP was depressed:



Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicides.
http://www.suicide.org/suicide-warning-signs.html

Had she made up her mind?



You all can flame me and say she would never do it, etc, etc.

If only suicide were so easily predicated or so rare and not so very tragic.

Wonderful, loved, educated people make one bad decision way too often.

I know there is a lot of discussion about SM and their PD and the way things are and all but I think there may be a deeper reason for their silence.

Of course, while I am writing this solemn missive SMPD are probably cuffing MP.

All imo

No one should be flaming you here-and this is a valid POV. She had a lot to be in despair about for sure. BUT if they had made a decision to separate, what happened that caused the DV incident report?

 

[KathyJ]

OMG - we wrote almost the same thing at the same time! :crazy:

Needless to say, I totally agree!

EEEK! Great minds think a like :rocker:

It's just the whole point of people being arm chair quarterbacks, all with good intentions. Someone mentioned on here this is not TV and it's not. Police do not owe us a thing. It's way too easy these days to mess up a case based on a mistake and see someone set free on a technicality. Our justice system blows and it's always the cops that get blamed.

 

[happy409]

So . . . I think we just need to be patient and wait because things may be going on behind the scenes of which even Arlene is unaware. The system is slow, but this is not going to be brushed under the rug.

I completely agree, but at the same time with the constant exposure of AD and other's keeping it out there does place (if even some) pressure on LE to just not hope it goes away. SMPD is not a bad town force, they just do not have the type of resources to deal with a case like this. To add to that, HCSO is slammed with new investigations every day! It's going to take a while for sure. IMHO!

 

[KathyJ]

For me Arlene’s article only made me more concerned about a thought which I have had that another poster was brave enough to post albeit while waving a white flag.

I see the evidence of the possibility of suicide.

I can think that would be a reason that privacy would be protected- for Gail’s sake, for the children’s sake.

IF,IF,IF she had a made a comment, even to MP, that might lead anyone to think that it might be indication she might hurt herself then it is most defiantly a private family matter.

I am unsettled about GP calling while at the lake home saying she was scared and wanted Adele to pick her up.

http://www.chattanoogan.com/articles/article_203035.asp



Not me and the children?

Personally my first words back would have been of what? MP? Did GP not tell Adele that SM LE had been called over the separate car issue?

Why did GP not call the Wetumka police and get an RO if she was afraid?

Why make plans to have the talk with the children together the next weekend in that same location?

I think she was afraid for herself of herself.

A very sensitive and emotional point of a very, very difficult situation:



A MSM first person report that GP was depressed:



Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicides.
http://www.suicide.org/suicide-warning-signs.html

Had she made up her mind?



You all can flame me and say she would never do it, etc, etc.

If only suicide were so easily predicated or so rare and not so very tragic.

Wonderful, loved, educated people make one bad decision way too often.

I know there is a lot of discussion about SM and their PD and the way things are and all but I think there may be a deeper reason for their silence.

Of course, while I am writing this solemn missive SMPD are probably cuffing MP.

All imo

I agree, a very valid point, but I cannot help but think if it was a suicide, we would have known that by now. Truly my first thought on all of this was foul play first (it's always my first thought) second was an accident. I don't know the area at all down there but from what I have heard I could see the car being in water or in woods or something and not being found right away.

There are just too many what if's but now with all information that is coming out it's starting to point in a bad bad direction and speculation.

 

[perico]

In all fairness does any smaller community police department know how to handle a situation like this? I am from the outside of Chicago and most towns around me including the one I live in is a large town and we still have two missing women in this area.
We had one husband who could not keep his face out of the media and the other was barely seen on tv. Speculation is that the Hubbies were involved......but these cases are still open and the two women have never been found.....

Good question.

Hamilton County is made up of a lot of different small towns, and Chattanooga. The SMPD is rather, shall we say, infamous, even among some of the neighboring community LE.

I don't mean to harp on this point or turn this into a LE bash because I want to have a favorable opinion of LE, and in 99% of the country I do respect them, but we've got Arlene claiming to recieve "threatening texts" from the PD on Signal Mtn, and it's sad that it doesn't surprise me in the least bit, even if she was out of line. In many instances, I would agree that someone saying this might be overstepping their bounds, but the SMPD have a bad rap among a lot of people who live here, and it's not surprising.

My opinion is that this case will go cold if a lot of pressure isn't put on the department.

 

[KathyJ]

Good question.

Hamilton County is made up of a lot of different small towns, and Chattanooga. The SMPD is rather, shall we say, infamous, even among some of the neighboring community LE.

I don't mean to harp on this point or turn this into a LE bash because I want to have a favorable opinion of LE, and in 99% of the country I do respect them, but we've got Arlene claiming to recieve "threatening texts" from the PD on Signal Mtn, and it's sad that it doesn't surprise me in the least bit, even if she was out of line. In many instances, I would agree that someone saying this might be overstepping their bounds, but the SMPD have a bad rap among a lot of people who live here, and it's not surprising.

My opinion is that this case will go cold if a lot of pressure isn't put on the department.

Perico-
I do question the fact that Arlene was sent a text. What is that? I cannot imagine a cop texting me something like that. I would understand if they came to her house or brought her to the station but a text message.

I would like to know if Arlene went in and spoke to a higher up about the text she received and would love to know what they would say.

Sorry but I don't think it's standard procedure to text a civilian that she is interfering with an investigation. Another red flag.

 

[perico]

My personal opinion would be that if she committed suicide, would she put her children through the despair of not knowing? I understand the idea of not wanting your kids to find your body, but not knowing leaves that lack of closure that cause even more despair down the road. Would she do that to her loved ones?

 

[KathyJ]

Another thought to the mental capacity of Gail.

She seemed "on top" of things. Gathering information based on gut feeling and odd things she experienced with MP.

My thought on this is, if nothing had come out about the affair right there people can speculate she was not in her right mind and or was paranoid. Hiring a PI would show she is even more paranoid. However, what she did investigate herself turned out to be true.

IMO MP had alot to lose if he was caught, something tells me he caught wind of what Gail was doing and he had a ton to lose, in fact he has already lost the main thing...his job. A good one at that. That in itself will make someone mentally unstable....so let's turn the tables here and think about who was really emotionally distraught. A women who for a few weeks is speculating her husband is cheating? Or a man who stands to lose EVERYTHING!

 

[Sleuthy1]

For me Arlene’s article only made me more concerned about a thought which I have had that another poster was brave enough to post albeit while waving a white flag.

I see the evidence of the possibility of suicide.

I can think that would be a reason that privacy would be protected- for Gail’s sake, for the children’s sake.

IF,IF,IF she had a made a comment, even to MP, that might lead anyone to think that it might be indication she might hurt herself then it is most defiantly a private family matter.

I am unsettled about GP calling while at the lake home saying she was scared and wanted Adele to pick her up.

http://www.chattanoogan.com/articles/article_203035.asp



Not me and the children?

Personally my first words back would have been of what? MP? Did GP not tell Adele that SM LE had been called over the separate car issue?

Why did GP not call the Wetumka police and get an RO if she was afraid?

Why make plans to have the talk with the children together the next weekend in that same location?

I think she was afraid for herself of herself.

A very sensitive and emotional point of a very, very difficult situation:



A MSM first person report that GP was depressed:



Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicides.
http://www.suicide.org/suicide-warning-signs.html

Had she made up her mind?



You all can flame me and say she would never do it, etc, etc.

If only suicide were so easily predicated or so rare and not so very tragic.

Wonderful, loved, educated people make one bad decision way too often.

I know there is a lot of discussion about SM and their PD and the way things are and all but I think there may be a deeper reason for their silence.

Of course, while I am writing this solemn missive SMPD are probably cuffing MP.

All imo

:twocents:Absolutely not! Not suicide ... w/o going into details... I can say ....this was not an option for Gail... and as a medical professional ... I can tell you that even if I were to entertain your "suicide scenario" ... ppl contemplating suicide and ultimately following through with their plans don't hide themselves and their vehicles ... they don't disappear without a trace ... Gotta majorly disagree with you on this speculation/scenario:banghead:

 

[Sleuthy1]

My personal opinion would be that if she committed suicide, would she put her children through the despair of not knowing? I understand the idea of not wanting your kids to find your body, but not knowing leaves that lack of closure that cause even more despair down the road. Would she do that to her loved ones?

no she would not!

 

[Sleuthy1]

Another thought to the mental capacity of Gail.

She seemed "on top" of things. Gathering information based on gut feeling and odd things she experienced with MP.

My thought on this is, if nothing had come out about the affair right there people can speculate she was not in her right mind and or was paranoid. Hiring a PI would show she is even more paranoid. However, what she did investigate herself turned out to be true.

IMO MP had alot to lose if he was caught, something tells me he caught wind of what Gail was doing and he had a ton to lose, in fact he has already lost the main thing...his job. A good one at that. That in itself will make someone mentally unstable....so let's turn the tables here and think about who was really emotionally distraught. A women who for a few weeks is speculating her husband is cheating? Or a man who stands to lose EVERYTHING!

thank you kathy....very well said ...you took the words right out of my mouth...:great:

 

[Jade]

No one should be flaming you here-and this is a valid POV. She had a lot to be in despair about for sure. BUT if they had made a decision to separate, what happened that caused the DV incident report?

Well, we know MP had made a decision.

Gail said she only talked with Matt once on the phone that week. He told her he "would be filing for a legal separation on Tuesday."

It seems he was moving on and rapidly.

I’m not sure she was totally ready to let go. She had her evidence why let him file first?

As I’ve said before if I had known what she knew and he threw a fit and got out of the car I wouldn’t call the police to tell them he wouldn’t get back in. He would have walked home to find the locks already changed on the door.

All imo

 

[KathyJ]

thank you kathy....very well said ...you took the words right out of my mouth...:great:

Thanks! Of course knowing your marriage is going to possibly end is going to upset you, your not human if it doesn't. Too much of what has been said proves to me her mental state was normal. Losing your husband is not easy even if the marriage is not good. Losing everything? As in, your wife, your children, your job, peoples respect, your homes -----that can make a stable person lose it.

 

[Pearl*]

As I’ve said before if I had known what she knew and he threw a fit and got out of the car I wouldn’t call the police to tell them he wouldn’t get back in. He would have walked home to find the locks already changed on the door.

All imo

I've wondered about this situation. My response would have depended greatly on the location. Such as...was it in a rural area where leaving him could have posed a real danger? Was it day or night, and how many miles would he have had to walk? If those details were given somewhere, I missed it.

 

[Pearl*]

Perico-
I do question the fact that Arlene was sent a text. What is that? I cannot imagine a cop texting me something like that. I would understand if they came to her house or brought her to the station but a text message.

I would like to know if Arlene went in and spoke to a higher up about the text she received and would love to know what they would say.

Sorry but I don't think it's standard procedure to text a civilian that she is interfering with an investigation. Another red flag.

I wondered about that too. Definitely seems unusual. But if for some reason it had been difficult to get in touch with her and time seemed critical, I also think it might have been reasonable to try every contact approach possible. If I understood correctly, Arlene was "on the go" and might have been difficult to reach. Not trying to justify, but just trying to think of possible explanations.

Also...not to assume...but it strikes me that the word "threatening" might be a media-chosen eye-catcher to get a headline. I don't remember reading the particular message anywhere (and am not asking to--it seems that perhaps more details are out there than would be wise), but "threatening" is a very strong word, to say the least. No question that Arlene is on the offensive (in a good way) and interpretation of the text could be very subjective.

Regardless of the wisdom of Arlene's every move, her dedication to this case warms my heart. Arlene is the kind of friend I think we would ALL love to have!

On the other hand, I'm worried about Arlene. In the article I read, she was quoted as saying she can't eat, can't sleep, and has lost 27 lbs. since this all began. I know she's grieving but hope she can find some peace in knowing she's given Gail all that is humanly possible, and may need to take care of Arlene for a while.

 

[confused]

Glorias...I am curious about something you said. How did you come to this conclusion? Do you know Matt/Gail/ or Matt's mother? ... Ii was just wondering ... I haven't read anything about Gail's relationship with her mother-in-law at all. I have wondered where her voice has been in all this?...just my :twocents:

I can tell you for a fact that Matt's mother loves Gail, and always has considered her a daughter. She has told me many stories of trips she and Gail took together, shopping, decorating, etc. She is devastated by all that is going on, but with all the accusations flying around about Matt and even her, she's scared to step foot out of her house.

 

[KathyJ]

I wondered about that too. Definitely seems unusual. But if for some reason it had been difficult to get in touch with her and time seemed critical, I also think it might have been reasonable to try every contact approach possible. If I understood correctly, Arlene was "on the go" and might have been difficult to reach. Not trying to justify, but just trying to think of possible explanations.

I can understand if she was not easy to get in touch with, but what exactly was she doing that would make them have to text her and not wait until they were able to make personal contact. It just makes me think again, they know alot more than we seem to think that they do.

I also have to keep in mind I am only hearing Arlene's side of the text. Not to say she is wrong but there are usually THREE sides to every story. We are only hearing one side.

 

[JayCeeVee]

http://www.wrcbtv.com/Global/story.asp?S=14878595

Seems to me that Arlene is only trying to assist in finding her friend Gail. I wonder why Gail went back to the home; that part just doesn't make sense to me especially leaving the children unless she was thinking of their school, that could very well be. There are many missing pieces here.

Jan V

 

[Jade]

I’m not sure that we can put everyday reasoning to test with suicidal ideation.

I so feared that someone would think that a mention of GP being depressed or upset would somehow be turned to think of as a weakness on her part. I do not believe that at all and that attitude is what leads to a stigma and can keep people from getting the help they need.

She could have thought not knowing was better than knowing.

Vigorous denials of her mental state as uncharacteristic may speak to a person who has high standards for herself and fear of disappointing others who had high regard for her.

We do not know where the jeep is. It may be right there close on SM down a ravine, in water...

IMO, Just from the outside looking in MP didn’t seem too worried about the affair being exposed.

When MP went to the conference and defrauded his company by not attending he had already thrown caution to the wind.

By all accounts it was common knowledge anyway.

Rumor has it many of the men from the mountain cheat on their wife’s in town and the men stick together on that.

All imo

 

[believe09]

I think "threat" is a dramatic word-If the text message is accurate, I think it could be viewed as a warning.

I wonder if the sponsors of the RiverBend event would consider posting pictures of the missing women in the area at the venues???