TX: HELOTES Baby found dead in hot car parked at Texas Walmart

[Blondie in Spokane]

I'm with you Dateline....I just don't understand (and never will, regardless of excuses) how ANYONE can forget their baby in a car. It's absolutely baffling.....my son was, has always been, will always be....my life. He was my main focus regardless of what else I had going on at any time. I worked full time as a single mom with NO help and he crossed my mind numerous times an hour, even while busy at work. Yes I admit I am judgemental- but we are talking about a living, breathing, dependent child. This is sickening.

 

[cuffem]

Right. How can this be possible?

You know how you take a medication everyday and sometimes you are not sure if you took it after just taking it? Now I am not comparing caring for children to taking meds but I think it involves the same cognitive function or whatever.People are so much in a hurry and so many distractions with short attention spans.I am sure he did think of the child but assumed he dropped the child off. I am not making excuses for this but I can see this being accidental.All of you can be outraged and maybe even think it is on purpose but people are human and make mistakes,bad deathly mistakes.

 

[DatelineFan]

I'm with you Dateline....I just don't understand (and never will, regardless of excuses) how ANYONE can forget their baby in a car. It's absolutely baffling.....my son was, has always been, will always be....my life. He was my main focus regardless of what else I had going on at any time. I worked full time as a single mom with NO help and he crossed my mind numerous times an hour, even while busy at work. Yes I admit I am judgemental- but we are talking about a living, breathing, dependent child. This is sickening.

First of all, great job, Mom! I have a soft spot for single parents. Parenting is hard enough with a partner. Those who are doing it alone and well, you have all my respect!

It is so strange. I have never even come close to forgetting someone else's child. I don't know how someone could forget their OWN. I hate thinking about the suffering these little ones go through in their last hours. It just kills me. I do feel for him. I can't imagine the life long pain and suffering from the guilt and "what ifs". It's very sad.

 

[cuffem]

One thing that seems to be consistent with the "genuine" accidents is that responsibility for the "forgotten child" was a break in routine. Maybe not "just" a man-thing. The opposite spouse ends up taking a child to daycare, and forgets them. A different caregiver picks up a child, child falls asleep, caregiver forgets. We can make a difference educating the ones with the break in routine and distraction issues. They have a conscience, at least. Most are good citizens and law abiding.

However, IMO, we can never make a difference with stupid, irresponsible caregivers, who never should have been parents or caregivers in the first place, IMO. They are beyond help other than storing them away in prison, IMO. Caregiver intentionally gets drunk, leaves or forgets child in car. Mother going to a job interview (Shanesha Taylor- AZ) intentionally leaves babies in car, rather than rescheduling or getting a sitter. Mother goes to strip club job, leaves kid in car. Parent goes shopping, leaves kid in car. Parent goes to casino, leaves kid in car. Etc. Those are not accidents-- those situations are "on purpose." I wish we could prevent these adults from breeding in the first place.

Well I agree with the first part of your post but the second part all I can say is no one can dictate who has or does not have children.

 

[DatelineFan]

You know how you take a medication everyday and sometimes you are not sure if you took it after just taking it? Now I am not comparing caring for children to taking meds but I think it involves the same cognitive function or whatever.People are so much in a hurry and so many distractions with short attention spans.I am sure he did think of the child but assumed he dropped the child off. I am not making excuses for this but I can see this being accidental.All of you can be outraged and maybe even think it is on purpose but people are human and make mistakes,bad deathly mistakes.

I don't know if you read my first post in this thread, but I'm not at all saying he did it on purpose. I'm honestly trying to understand. I'm not a parent, so I don't know what it's like. But I have been a nanny, and I've taken care of kids overnight, for several days in a row. Again, it's nothing like being a parent, but I'm still "on" when there are children depending on me. I guess I don't understand how one turns that awareness off. I have definitely forgotten other things, like making sure I put a 2nd change of clothes in the diaper bag. But not the actual human being.

 

[AmyPond]

I hear you...I don't get it either. Maybe because I don't have a "routine," per se, since I am a stay at home mom. But every time I'm in the car, I glance back at stoplights and whatnot to see what he's up to (he is almost 3 and still rear-facing but I can see him in the mirror.) He's also just always in the front of my mind. Seriously. Like...constantly. Before I had a child, I never realized how much of my mind would be consumed with thoughts of him. But that's just the way it is for me. Maybe that's not normal though...I don't know.

Here is the Walmart sign (found via google) -

 

[AmyPond]

Thinking about this problem of leaving baby in the car, the one thing that comes to mind is to put an alarm on the car seat.

I am not an engineer, but one could certainly design a system. If the baby is in the car seat and the straps are buckled, an alarm goes off to remind you there is a baby in his seat. Similar to the car telling us to put our seatbelt on. The alarm keeps beeping for so many seconds after the door is shut, just like the lights stay on. Or, the car won't lock if a baby is left in his car seat.

I believe the car seat manufactures and car companies are going to need to get together to find a solution to this problem. Yes, the price of both will go up. There are always those few people that ruin a good thing and everybody pays.

My opinions only.

Evenflo makes a car seat with an alarm...

http://www.evenflo.com/SensorSafe/

 

[GeeEm]

Evenflo makes a car seat with an alarm...

http://www.evenflo.com/SensorSafe/

Newer vehicles are coming out with alarms to notify, I seen on television, thank God!

jmo :moo:

 

[GeeEm]

I hear you...I don't get it either. Maybe because I don't have a "routine," per se, since I am a stay at home mom. But every time I'm in the car, I glance back at stoplights and whatnot to see what he's up to (he is almost 3 and still rear-facing but I can see him in the mirror.) He's also just always in the front of my mind. Seriously. Like...constantly. Before I had a child, I never realized how much of my mind would be consumed with thoughts of him. But that's just the way it is for me. Maybe that's not normal though...I don't know.

Here is the Walmart sign (found via google) -

Hi AmyPond ~

Your posts IS normal


Was that sign located at the Wal Mart he worked at?

Thanks ~

 

[AmyPond]

I'm not sure. I'm also not sure if employees enter through the main doors or some other door.

 

[AlwaysShocked]

Sometimes I wonder if this would be made an "automatic crime" if it would help to focus these supremely forgetful parents more on what they are doing in life. Theoretically these parents are well aware that it is the law to place the child into a car seat, and they do this.

Would making it a crime nationwide to leave any child under a certain age alone in a vehicle bring enough attention to the situation that it might not help?


Articles report at least 27 vehicle deaths so far this year vs. 15 last year. So the number has almost doubled.

 

[AmyPond]

Not in a case where it's a true accident. Losing a child for those types of parents is far worse "punishment" than anything the courts would give out.

 

[AlwaysShocked]

It was not so much the "punishment" aspect of it that I was focusing on. Just that the act of making it "against the law" to leave a child might elevate the act in the consciousness of people who drive. Just like we all get used to coming to a complete stop at a stop sign. Or buckling our child or grandchild into a car seat.

We didn't learn to do these things just because we wanted to. We learned to do them because it is the law to do these things.

Based on the figures, this is a growing problem. ANYTHING that can be done to prevent it should be implemented IMHO.

And absolutely, the parents of small children who are in any kind of care should be communicating with each other early in the day, immediately after the child should have been dropped off. And what about the daycare? Did they call anyone? That can be another back up for forgetful parents.

It is so very sad all the way around. But the thing is, it is preventable.

 

[PeggyAnnMcKay]

It was not so much the "punishment" aspect of it that I was focusing on. Just that the act of making it "against the law" to leave a child might elevate the act in the consciousness of people who drive. Just like we all get used to coming to a complete stop at a stop sign. Or buckling our child or grandchild into a car seat.

We didn't learn to do these things just because we wanted to. We learned to do them because it is the law to do these things.

Based on the figures, this is a growing problem. ANYTHING that can be done to prevent it should be implemented IMHO.

And absolutely, the parents of small children who are in any kind of care should be communicating with each other early in the day, immediately after the child should have been dropped off. And what about the daycare? Did they call anyone? That can be another back up for forgetful parents.

It is so very sad all the way around. But the thing is, it is preventable.

I hear you. Anything to bring awareness. It is crazy unbelievable how often this is happening to these poor kids. Are we just so distracted by everything around us that we forget the most precious things in our lives?

 

[jjenny]

It was not so much the "punishment" aspect of it that I was focusing on. Just that the act of making it "against the law" to leave a child might elevate the act in the consciousness of people who drive. Just like we all get used to coming to a complete stop at a stop sign. Or buckling our child or grandchild into a car seat.

We didn't learn to do these things just because we wanted to. We learned to do them because it is the law to do these things.

Based on the figures, this is a growing problem. ANYTHING that can be done to prevent it should be implemented IMHO.

And absolutely, the parents of small children who are in any kind of care should be communicating with each other early in the day, immediately after the child should have been dropped off. And what about the daycare? Did they call anyone? That can be another back up for forgetful parents.

It is so very sad all the way around. But the thing is, it is preventable.

I am pretty sure it's already illegal.

 

[jjenny]

Not in a case where it's a true accident. Losing a child for those types of parents is far worse "punishment" than anything the courts would give out.

Does it only apply to their own child? What if they forget somebody else's child?

 

[rob]

Sometimes I wonder if this would be made an "automatic crime" if it would help to focus these supremely forgetful parents more on what they are doing in life. Theoretically these parents are well aware that it is the law to place the child into a car seat, and they do this.

Would making it a crime nationwide to leave any child under a certain age alone in a vehicle bring enough attention to the situation that it might not help?


Articles report at least 27 vehicle deaths so far this year vs. 15 last year. So the number has almost doubled.

I agree. If people KNOW that its illegal, and that they will go to jail, maybe it will give them more incentive to do something different. I'm thinking about inventing something large and flashing that goes onto the steering wheel, "DID YOU FORGET THE BABY". Something has to change. This is happening too much. It also gives people who want to get rid of the baby/small child an idea of what to do (I'm thinking RH).
My new invention could be given to all new parents when they leave the hospital with the baby or included in a box of diapers or a case of milk.
I wouldn't want to make money off of it, just possibly same a child.

Or put a small stuffed animal on your keychain, or the ever important cell phone in the babies lap in the carseat ( that would solve the problem for sure) Or make a window stick-on to put right on the drivers window- DID YOU FORGET THE BABY? That might also get passer-bys attention to look into the car to see if there is a baby. There's a million ways to solve this problem. I'm guessing the biggest problem is no one thinks that they will be the one to forget. Unless of course, it's intentional or you wanted to get drunk and not baby sit, etc......

 

[Jovi Girl]

There are mirrors you can put on the back windshield and you can see the baby via your rear view mirror. We had them when my children were little, we just wanted to be able to keep on eye on the baby.

 

[AmyPond]

Some advice people are given is to put their shoe in the back seat. Then as soon as they get out of the car they'll realize they need their shoe.

The problem is that the people this happens to...when it is TRULY an accident...are people just like me who think "it can never happen to me." So they don't put their shoe in the back. I mean, I never say never. But I still don't put my shoe in the back or anything like that.

 

[GeeEm]

I agree. If people KNOW that its illegal, and that they will go to jail, maybe it will give them more incentive to do something different. I'm thinking about inventing something large and flashing that goes onto the steering wheel, "DID YOU FORGET THE BABY". Something has to change. This is happening too much. It also gives people who want to get rid of the baby/small child an idea of what to do (I'm thinking RH).
My new invention could be given to all new parents when they leave the hospital with the baby or included in a box of diapers or a case of milk.
I wouldn't want to make money off of it, just possibly same a child.

Or put a small stuffed animal on your keychain, or the ever important cell phone in the babies lap in the carseat ( that would solve the problem for sure) Or make a window stick-on to put right on the drivers window- DID YOU FORGET THE BABY? That might also get passer-bys attention to look into the car to see if there is a baby. There's a million ways to solve this problem. I'm guessing the biggest problem is no one thinks that they will be the one to forget. Unless of course, it's intentional or you wanted to get drunk and not baby sit, etc......

Hi rob

Copying from my original post:

"Come on people, leave a toy in the front seat, put your cell phone in the BACK seat, OMG just heartbreaking!"
Also, the newer vehicles are installing alarms for this situation.

Thanks ~

jmo :moo: