VA VA - Kelly Catalano, 40, Chesterfield, 15 Jan 2010 - #1

[knowthings]

Well I am confused about you saying you "came over" to take care of the cats early in 2009, weren't you guys still together then?

 

[truthsleuth]

CIV, this is the part that confuses me.

According to Chesterfield County property records, Kelly purchased her home on August 24, 2006. When she did so, there were two names reflected on the deed, Kelly's and another young woman her age. May 8th, 2009 Kelly removed this young woman's name from the deed. What does it mean in regard to Kelly's disappearance, perhaps nothing. But it's a fact, and I elected to bring it to your attention for that reason.

search assessments tab..you'll need the address

http://www.chesterfield.gov/eServices/RealEstateAssessments/RealEstate.aspx

... I can't be certain of the exact date, but Kelly changed the locks sometime around August 2009.

If your name was removed from the house deed in May 2009 (and that is of course a matter of public record), I am going to assume (knowing full well the danger in assuming) that was when you and Kelly broke up? So wasn't that when Kelly changed the locks? Or are you saying she waited 3-4 months (until August) to change them? Confusing.

 

[joseph d]

no...I did not watch the pets after Kelly changed the locks. I can't be certain of the exact date, but Kelly changed the locks sometime around August 2009.

uh oh.

 

[jokie7348]

ugh - I should be involved, I shouldn't be involved, I'm too involved, I'm not involved enough....everyone has an opinion. It is a difficult situation for all involved. I thought I might have information that was helpful in finding Kelly. For the most part, the break-up was as amicable as a break-up could be. Prior to August 2009, I would occasionally care for the pets while Kelly was out of town. The separation was difficult for Kelly to handle. The way she handled me getting my things out of the house was not good, and we agreed to cut ties completely. She sent my mom an email that same day saying that she was sorry they could no longer be friends. (They had been going out ballroom dancing together on Friday nights, not every Friday, but often.)

Concerned, I believe what we're missing here sometimes is TACT. Certainly questions will be asked, but it would be nice if everyone could think about their questions, statements, before posting. Sometimes the written word comes out much different than face-to-face speaking.
I applaud your desire to help in finding Kelly. Everyone has an opinion; the only thing that really matters is that you are doing what you feel is the right thing to do.
I wish sleuthing could really mean just that and not offering opinions that don't add to the case and that are hurtful.
Hang in there. Your input is valuable.

 

[MyTinkieGirl]

Because when I lived there, my car was the one in the garage. The point was that Kelly was usually in a hurry leaving for work in the morning. She would use the front door and many times left it unlocked.

After I left for good, she parked her car in the garage. Which to me would only indicate that if she had possibly forgotten to lock the doors, she probably wouldn't have even noticed because she would have been exiting through the door to the garage.

This is such a confusing case...and there ARE many inconsistant stories from ALL the people who've come on here that know Kelly, are related to her, work with her, etc...AND, not to mention, from media and neighbors.

I'm almost afraid to post anything for not wanting to offend anyone.

I KNOW, CiV, you're probably wracking your brain trying to sort things out and answer questions by using your knowledge of Kelly, having been in a long term relationship with her. So, I just wanted to say that it's NOT that "you" are being questioned, per se, it's the actual INFORMATION and OCCURRENCES we have that's being questioned, IMO.....and that's all I'm doing by this statement, OK??

Now, when you and she were together, you said she would be in a hurry leaving for work... run out the FRONT door and often forget to lock it...that seems perfectly understandable....
BUT, for the past 6 months or so AFTER you "left for good", Kelly had been doing the "new" routine of parking HER car in the garage and leaving THAT way....by the garage door....what reason would the front door be open or unlocked if she didn't use it to "hurry out the door for work" anymore??

I mean, it doesn't mean she couldn't have "used" the front door some other time....but, after getting into a routine of leaving thru the garage door, one wouldn't REALLY expect the front door being left unlocked as "NORMAL", at this point in time, since she didn't use that "old" routine when leaving for work in the morning.

ETA : I could see the "garage" door being unlocked as something understandable...."normal"....since she was NOW "rushing" out THAT door for work in the morning.....but, IMO, when you get into a routine of using another way to leave, the other door (front) would probably remain locked...IMO, of course.

 

[Curious18]

CIV, this is the part that confuses me.






If your name was removed from the house deed in May 2009 (and that is of course a matter of public record), I am going to assume (knowing full well the danger in assuming) that was when you and Kelly broke up? So wasn't that when Kelly changed the locks? Or are you saying she waited 3-4 months (until August) to change them? Confusing.

If ConcernedinVA was a legitamite suspect, maybe these dates would mean more to me, but I do admit I hate to loose strings.

To Concerned, I too applaud you for sticking it out in this forum, IMHO, you've been helpful and very, very gracious in the face of some of these questions which I would call borderline attacks.

The object is to find Kelly and think everyone means well, let's just keep Kelly in mind. Just my observations, sorry if I hurt anyone feelings, it was not meant to.

 

[Shutterfly]

:HBwhiteflag:

I don't think anyone is more cynical or as quick to pick people apart as I am. It's just in my nature, and that comes from forty years of realizing that the majority of people can't be trusted as far as I can throw them. They don't call me the original skeptic for no reason. But I do LISTEN and I've elected to sit back and 'hear' what CiV says with an open mind. What was it I read?

"Show compassion, peace and understanding: begin with yourself, then expand your practice to include all beings." :wave:

Here goes......
I have an ex-significant other whom I was with for a dozen years. It ended badly(by definition), some sixteen months ago. I can easily see myself in CiV's position. Those on the fringes of the relationship often see only the catastrophic blow-up's, not what was once normal, and what led to the success of the relationship for so long before it got to be too much to handle. Normal day to day relationship content doesn't make good gossip, it's boring. It's the bad that everyone talks about and remembers. If I or my ex vanished, the other would be shredded by family, friends and the media...and especially here. I know how we are here.
I have seen it stated that it's so odd that CiV is the ex and is so eager to help find her ex. Well, aren't all of us here working like dogs to try and find a COMPLETE stranger? If what CiV is doing is odd, then aren't all of us here on this forum odd right along with her? Locals post frequently. They too are involving themselves. We all do!!!! That proves beyond the shadow of a doubt that each and every one of us are cut from the same cloth.

Please be kind to one another. :blowkiss:

I can't help but wonder, because I believe CiV does know Kelly the best, that she may just hold the key to this mystery and not even realize it.

 

[nursebeeme]

bless you shutterfly

 

[MyTinkieGirl]

:HBwhiteflag:

I don't think anyone is more cynical or as quick to pick people apart as I am. It's just in my nature, and that comes from forty years of realizing that the majority of people can't be trusted as far as I can throw them. They don't call me the original skeptic for no reason. But I do LISTEN and I've elected to sit back and 'hear' what CiV says with an open mind.
"Show compassion, peace and understanding: begin with yourself, then expand your practice to include all beings." :wave:

Here goes......
I have an ex-significant other whom I was with for a dozen years. It ended badly(by definition), some sixteen months ago. I can easily see myself in CiV's position. Those on the fringes of the relationship often see only the catastrophic blow-up's, not what was once normal, and what led to the success of the relationship for so long before it got to be too much to handle. Normal day to day relationship content doesn't make good gossip, it's boring. It's the bad that everyone talks about and remembers. If I or my ex vanished, the other would be shredded by family, friends and the media...and especially here. I know how we are here.
I have seen it stated that it's so odd that CiV is the ex and is so eager to help find her ex. Well, aren't all of us here working like dogs to try and find a COMPLETE stranger? If what CiV is doing is odd, then aren't all of us here on this forum odd right along with her? Locals post frequently. They too are involving themselves. We all do!!!! That proves beyond the shadow of a doubt that each and every one of us are cut from the same cloth.

Please be kind to one another. :blowkiss:

I can't help but wonder, because I believe CiV does know Kelly the best, that she may just hold the key to this mystery and not even realize it.

IMO...I don't see it so much as anyone being picked apart, but of questioning "questions"...if that makes sense. Jokie7348 said it best....things seen "written" aren't always the same as when "spoken"....it's also that "tact" word, too.
But, again, IMO, if you don't ask questions, you don't get answers....and sometimes the answers require even more questions....being "outside" DOES bring MORE objectivity.....being side by side with someone day after day often mutes things readily available to the naked eye. That's why a lot of us are here....not just to listen...but to analyze what's been said and dig FURTHER and ask some more....and even more after THAT!!

ETA : All just IMO....and...I've been doing exactly what you've been doing....just reading what everyone has to say and only posted a question today....I'm not even paying attention to who really says what....just when something isn't clear, you ask a question to clarify it, no?? An inconsistancy...ask a question, right??

 

[ConcernedinVA]

CIV, this is the part that confuses me.






If your name was removed from the house deed in May 2009 (and that is of course a matter of public record), I am going to assume (knowing full well the danger in assuming) that was when you and Kelly broke up? So wasn't that when Kelly changed the locks? Or are you saying she waited 3-4 months (until August) to change them? Confusing.

We split up many times in our history, but this was the first time I was the one to leave. As I said, the split was fairly amicable/yet somewhat arduous for quite some time. We split in April of 2008 and continued to live together (but separate) until I moved some of my belongings and myself out in February 2009. (I was still a student and only working part-time). Over that time, and many conversations later, she knew our relationship was over, with no hope of reconciliation, (which every other time we had split, there had been a reconciliation, why would she believe this time would be different?). I think each step in the process was like a dare... 'I dare you to cross this line to show me that you're serious...that you really aren't coming back.' Each line was crossed. Each 'i' was dotted. Knowing Kelly, I believe she was always hoping for a reconciliation. She was tenacious and steadfast in a lot of ways, sometimes to her detriment.

In May of 2009, we changed the house deed at my request. We agreed that I would keep my things there - a mutually beneficial arrangement (most furnishings belonged to me and Kelly would have to purchase all new ones), until I had settled into a new place. Then in August 2009, Kelly asked me to remove my belongings, which I did. I can't remember exactly when she said that she had changed the locks. I'm pretty sure she notified me with a text message...but it was just before I moved the rest of my things out and we broke off contact completely.

As I have stated, I can only attest to Kelly's traits, characteristics, habits, etc that I have personal knowledge of...and that personal knowledge stopped in Aug. 2009. That being said, I have known this woman since 1997... people's tendencies and character don't change overnight. I am sure she didn't have a complete emotional make-over in 6 months, but anything is possible.

 

[VA Mom]

Why was Kelly afraid that her ex might try and come back into her house, having all the locks changed is unusual unless you are scared of that person!

What??? Afraid??? Kelly was exercising good judgement in changing the locks. It's interesting to see your reaction to what is normally done as a safety precaution when there is a change in residence or living arrangement. Kelly loved Concerned in VA, and may not have been open about her feeliings with her friends and family, but she spoke highly of her to me even after their breakup. Apparently there is a disconnect in what she told her family/friends and what she expressed to me but that could be because she knew I loved them both and was personally affected by their breakup.

 

[Shutterfly]

Now then, on another note....

I haven't decided if I have faith in the psychic on that other forum or not. BUT, she posts about sand and trucks moving earth (paraphrasing here) and I found something interesting because sand, trucks and smoke stacks stuck in my head. It's been a long time since I ran around this area but for some bizarre reason Mr. Shutterfly just called me. HE REMEMBERED!!!!

Can you read it? That's the sign for Vulcan Puddledock, conveniently located on...you guessed it, Puddledock Road!

Guess what they do? It's a rock quarry...and they move earth, sand and gravel, by truck, trailer and by boat....
http://www.vul.com/vcm.asp?content=results&fac=42

There is/was a coal powered 'powerhouse' on the property (smoke stack) and I still see coal piles near it in the zoomed in aerials. There are long, grey structures (48' semi dump trailers), 'disused vehicles' both trucks and heavy equipment, and parts/tires in one area along the back. Just thought I'd throw it out there so you guys can take a look. Your next question, naturally, would be "how would Kelly get here?" I thought that might come up....

The river.....

Except that they're 53' trailers Shutter, you moron. You'd never believe that ex I have, of a dozen years, IS A TRUCK DRIVER.....good grief.......

 

[truthsleuth]

We split up many times in our history, but this was the first time I was the one to leave. As I said, the split was fairly amicable/yet somewhat arduous for quite some time. We split in April of 2008 and continued to live together (but separate) until I moved some of my belongings and myself out in February 2009. (I was still a student and only working part-time). Over that time, and many conversations later, she knew our relationship was over, with no hope of reconciliation, (which every other time we had split, there had been a reconciliation, why would she believe this time would be different?). I think each step in the process was like a dare... 'I dare you to cross this line to show me that you're serious...that you really aren't coming back.' Each line was crossed. Each 'i' was dotted. Knowing Kelly, I believe she was always hoping for a reconciliation. She was tenacious and steadfast in a lot of ways, sometimes to her detriment.

In May of 2009, we changed the house deed at my request. We agreed that I would keep my things there - a mutually beneficial arrangement (most furnishings belonged to me and Kelly would have to purchase all new ones), until I had settled into a new place. Then in August 2009, Kelly asked me to remove my belongings, which I did. I can't remember exactly when she said that she had changed the locks. I'm pretty sure she notified me with a text message...but it was just before I moved the rest of my things out and we broke off contact completely.

As I have stated, I can only attest to Kelly's traits, characteristics, habits, etc that I have personal knowledge of...and that personal knowledge stopped in Aug. 2009. That being said, I have known this woman since 1997... people's tendencies and character don't change overnight. I am sure she didn't have a complete emotional make-over in 6 months, but anything is possible.

I cannot begin to tell you how much I appreciate your consistent and kind responses to my questions about dates and other matters. My intention is never to attack you (and I'm fairly certain you already know that) but to try to lessen my own confusion about how and when events played out.

Most of the time it's extremely difficult to put the events of someone else's life in proper order. And I want to figure out Kelly's life before her disappearance--since you were a major part of her life, who would be more appropriate to ask.

I hope you understand and if you ever think my questions are out of line, just tell me so. Or ignore me. But please don't ever read them as "borderline attacks." Not me at all.

 

[Shutterfly]

I cannot begin to tell you how much I appreciate your consistent and kind responses to my questions about dates and other matters. My intention is never to attack you (and I'm fairly certain you already know that) but to try to lessen my own confusion about how and when events played out.

Most of the time it's extremely difficult to put the events of someone else's life in proper order. And I want to figure out Kelly's life before her disappearance--since you were a major part of her life, who would be more appropriate to ask.

I hope you understand and if you ever think my questions are out of line, just tell me so. Or ignore me. But please don't ever read them as "borderline attacks." Not me at all.

bolded by me.....

I so TOTALLY second that!!! One of these usually works with me....:slap:

 

[nursebeeme]

What??? Afraid??? Kelly was exercising good judgement in changing the locks. It's interesting to see your reaction to what is normally done as a safety precaution when there is a change in residence or living arrangement. Kelly loved Concerned in VA, and may not have been open about her feeliings with her friends and family, but she spoke highly of her to me even after their breakup. Apparently there is a disconnect in what she told her family/friends and what she expressed to me but that could be because she knew I loved them both and was personally affected by their breakup.

welcome to websleuths VAmom!

 

[dreamweaver]

There is/was a coal powered 'powerhouse' on the property (smoke stack) and I still see coal piles near it in the zoomed in aerials. There are long, grey structures (48' semi dump trailers), 'disused vehicles' both trucks and heavy equipment, and parts/tires in one area along the back. Just thought I'd throw it out there so you guys can take a look. Your next question, naturally, would be "how would Kelly get here?" I thought that might come up....

The river.....
'respectfully snipped by me'

shutterfly:
Thank you for the maps.
But I am a little confused.
Are you saying that Kelly could have gone into the river, and been swept
to the Vulcan business?

Maybe I have been online too long this morning and am missing something?

 

[dreamweaver]

VA Mom:
Welcome to WS.

Nice to have you here.

 

[Shutterfly]

VA Mom


:Welcome-12-june:

:seeya:

I used to be 23834

 

[truthsleuth]

Now then, on another note....

I haven't decided if I have faith in the psychic on that other forum or not. BUT, she posts about sand and trucks moving earth (paraphrasing here) and I found something interesting because sand, trucks and smoke stacks stuck in my head. It's been a long time since I ran around this area but for some bizarre reason Mr. Shutterfly just called me. HE REMEMBERED!!!!

Can you read it? That's the sign for Vulcan Puddledock, conveniently located on...you guessed it, Puddledock Road!

Guess what they do? It's a rock quarry...and they move earth, sand and gravel, by truck, trailer and by boat....
http://www.vul.com/vcm.asp?content=results&fac=42

There is/was a coal powered 'powerhouse' on the property (smoke stack) and I still see coal piles near it in the zoomed in aerials. There are long, grey structures (48' semi dump trailers), 'disused vehicles' both trucks and heavy equipment, and parts/tires in one area along the back. Just thought I'd throw it out there so you guys can take a look. Your next question, naturally, would be "how would Kelly get here?" I thought that might come up....

The river.....

Except that they're 53' trailers Shutter, you moron. You'd never believe that ex I have, of a dozen years, IS A TRUCK DRIVER.....good grief.......

Yep, my next question, naturally, is "How would Kelly get here?"
Any "object" in the river would first have to travel north, then turn south to get to this location. Is that even possible? I don't know much about rivers, obviously.

Nope, for me, if I'm applying any significance at all to the psychic's predictions I'm sticking with the lot with the red trucks.

Oh, and BTW, may I be the first at this site to officially declare myself "odd." Always have been, always will be.

 

[Shutterfly]

shutterfly:
Thank you for the maps.
But I am a little confused.
Are you saying that Kelly could have gone into the river, and been swept
to the Vulcan business?

Maybe I have been online too long this morning and am missing something?

I think I am, yes, but don't quote me on that....LOLOLOL. I just wanted to throw it out there because although it's difficult to imagine that she did wind up in the river and hasn't been found, there are a million places there that something going into that river could wind up. But I draw the line on her being responsible for putting herself there, at least intentionally.